Scribbles of a Broken Heart

’I can do this,’ I told myself while taking out my #2 pencil.

Mr. Yenen was starting to pass out the tests on the other side of the room. I looked over to Garrett, now sitting to my left. As a “Christmas gift” Mr. Yenen had let us switch seats for the first time in the year. Garrett couldn’t resist stealing the empty seat next to me once it became available.

Now, he was slightly shaking his head at me, blue eyes pleading me not to do what I had told him less than six hours ago. I breathed in deeply, trying my best not to just break down right then and there. It took all I had in me to control my overwhelming nerves, not to sob on the black table in front of me. Like a car out of control, I was hit full force: there was no turning back from this.

I knew, of course, that Garrett was worth this. But was he right?

‘No,’ I scolded myself. ‘This is more than just academic suicide. This is proof…it has to be sufficient proof.’

My legs began to shake as the person in the front of my row received four tests. My hands trembled terribly when I reached to grab the remaining two tests. But a pair of tanned hands intercepted them and passed the one test, as well as the extra one he had received, to the table behind us.

I felt his hand rest upon my left leg, which was quite easy since the lower half of my body was angled towards him. He stroked my knee with the side of his thumb, and I hoped the desks, chairs, and students in front of me offered adequate coverage.

Garrett slid the Biology test toward me, while still trying to calm the uncontrollable movement of my legs. A circle of silver rested in the right hand corner.

I looked over at him again, and it seemed as if his eyes were piercing right through me. He shook his head once more, brown hair swishing back and forth.

Don’t do this, he mouthed.

I picked up the ring, and slid it on to my right thumb, and for the first time it weeks, it did not feel naked. And I realized that this was how things were meant to be. Although Garrett probably gave me the ring back at that particular moment for a completely different reason, it just gave me the strength to complete this task. My life had turned into all or nothing, and he enabled me to take that leap.

I jotted my name down and read the first question.

‘Dear God, allow me to use the hours that I have studied to discern right from wrong, and to do my absolute worst on this test. I need Garrett in my life. Amen.’

Ms. Templeton looked nearly close to falling out of her oversized chair.

“You honestly answered all of them wrong?”

I shrugged, “I think I got a couple right by accident. True/False sections are my weakness.”

“What percentage did you receive?”

I faintly smiled, “A few days later, Mr. Yenen called Garrett and I out of Lit., which happened to be his free period. All of our classmates were oh-ing and ah-ing. Only our close friends knew all the drama that was going on between us, everyone else simply thought that we just got back together in an overly-romantic way. Garrett and I held hands all the way upstairs since the hallways are usually empty of teachers during class. We dropped hands once we got to the doorway of Mr. Yenen’s room. And let me tell you, he did not look happy.”

Mr. Yenen sighed as he smoothed down what little hair he had left. Angry eyes were focused on the sheets of paper held in front of him.

Garrett and I walked to his desk, and he looked up at the sound of our footsteps.

“Ah, Garrett…Constance,” he beckoned us to come to the front of his desk. “Do you know why

I pulled you out of class?”

Garrett shrugged, “Test grades?”

“That is exactly the reason.”

Mr. Yenen filled the empty space in front of him with two test papers, marred with red pen all over.

“I was beyond shocked when I graded these. And right now I’m wondering if this is some sort of joke.”

Ms. Templeton looked at me anxiously, "Garrett had scored a twenty-two percent, and I, got a six."