Status: Active!
If We Jump
'Cause I Have Hella Feelings For You
I drove around for a little while to cool off. When I came back, her mom was still at work so I let myself in. She was on the floor in the bathroom with her head over the toilet. "Hey you okay?" I asked, rubbing small circles on her back.
She nodded. "Just nauseous"
"Did you take your pill?" She nodded again and held up two fingers. "Let me make you some food. It'll help."
"No. I just want to sleep for a while" she tried to get up but couldn't quiet manage it with her cast so I picked her up and carried her into her room.
"You're only supposed to take one at a time. Don't go to sleep yet baby, I'm gonna get you something to eat." I told her and went in the kitchen. I came back in a little bit later with some chicken and rice to settle her stomach. She was laying down with tears silently streaming down her face. "What's going on with you Kodah?" She shook her head and started taking small bites of the food I gave her. When she was done eating, I grabbed her up and held her tight in my arms.
"What's got you so upset?"
"I'm sick of feeling like this." She said.
"Like what?"
"Not good enough."
"Are you crazy?" I laughed. What the hell was she talking about?
"Not for Brent. Not for you. Not for Morgan. Not for anybody." She said.
"Oh you are way too good for any us. Everyone you meet is lucky to have you in their life"
"Then why doesn't anybody ever stay?" She said into my shirt.
"I did."
"No you didn't. You cheated on me." She shook her head. Not this again.
"I fell in love with this amazing girl. And I made a stupid mistake a long time ago that made me lose her. You were far too good for me"
"Then why do you keep hurting me" she sobbed.
"I'm sorry for everything baby. I never meant to hurt you." I said honestly. She continued to cry into my shirt and eventually drifted off to sleep. I felt terrible. She was the one person I could never be without and I had walked out every time she needed me most. I held her until she woke up.
"Hey. Sorry. You can go home if you want. I told you I didn't need a babysitter" she said, wiping her eyes. I tilted her chin up to look in her eyes, "three years without was hell. I'm not leaving you." I told her and kissed her gently, not sure if she'd push me away. Instead she pulled herself closer to me.
"I really fucking love you." She told me.
"Marry me then." I blurted out. She looked surprised, staring at me for a minute before answering.
"Are you kidding?" She said, sounding confused.
I shook my head. "We might as well be. Look at us. We're nuts without each other. So let's not be without each other."
"We're not even dating Stephen. It's been years, we're not the same as we were" she said. I didn't care. I wanted her and only her. We sat there on her bed, watching something on the tv until her mom came in.
"Hey honey, how are you feeling?" She said coming over to kiss her on the head.
"I'm good" she smiled back.
"I need to run to my house, check on John and everything. I'll be back before you have to go to work" I said, smiling at her mom and she nodded with a smile. "It's time for your medicine. I'll see you soon" I told Dakotah, kissing her cheek before I left.
I went home and turned on my computer. I ordered some photo prints online, while I waited for John to get out of the shower.
"Oh you still live here?" He smirked, walking out of the bathroom. "How Dakotah?"
"I asked her to marry me." I said. His mouth fell open. "Wait are you serious? You're not even dating her! What did she say?"
"That's exactly what she said" I told him.
"Look at you, little Stevie's all grown up. You two are meant for each other. She'll say yes, just give it some time" he smiled, patting me on the shoulder before going downstairs.
Shortly after my phone was buzzing with texts. It was our bands group chat.
John: STEPHEN PROPOSED TO DAKOTAH!
John: crap, I forgot Stephen was part of this group chat. Sorry dude.
Brian: what!
Josh: Finally, congrats man.
Jess: OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU BOTH
Brian: did she say yes???
John: no. But she will.
Josh: seriously? Definitely wasn't expecting that.
Jess: wait, they're not even together for some reason
Brian: they might as well be, look at them!
John: that's why she didn't say yes
I closed out the message, not wanting to see anything else. You can always count on John to blab, but I knew Kodah would've told everyone eventually anyway.
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I had taken my meds earlier but they were pretty much worn off. Sleeping was impossible because the pain medicine had me sleeping all day. It was around 3:30 a.m. and Stephen texted me. Want to get out of the house for a little bit? I sent back definitely. He told me to come outside.
Mom, I had to get out the house for a little bit. I'm going crazy in here. Don't worry I'm with Stephen, he'll take care of me. I promise I'll be home soon. Love, Dakotah
I wrote a note for my mom and stuck it the the microwave. When I opened the door, Stephen was on my porch, ready to help me down the steps with my crutches. When we got to the bottom, I looked up. "Whose car is this?" I laughed. There was a white convertible with the top down sitting outside my house.
"I borrowed it from a friend" he smirked. He opened the door for me and put my crutches in the backseat.
"I'm getting real tired of those things" I said pointing to them.
"You won't need them forever" he said, getting into the drivers seat and starting the car.
"Where are we going?" I asked him. He smiled and told me to just wait and see.
About a half hour later, he stopped the car. We were up on a big hill, seemingly in the middle of nowhere. Looking out the windshield, you could see the whole city lit up beautifully.
"One of the few places near us you can actually see the stars" he said. He leaned over me and gave me a kiss on the cheek before pulling the lever to make my seat fly back. He did the same to his own and held my hand as we looked at the sky. The night was cool, and there was soft acoustic music playing quietly on the radio. It was perfect. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed my knuckles.
"What are we doing, Kodah?" He asked me, "do you want to try to be together again or do you want to move on? This on again off again thing isn't really for me"
"I can't move on so i guess I'm stuck with you" I smirked and he frowned at me.
"I try to be romantic and this is the thanks I get" he laughed. I leaned over and kissed him lightly so he knew I was kidding.
"Are you into Morgan?" He asked quietly after a few minutes of silence.
"Depends, are you jealous?" I laughed and I swear I saw him blush.
"No, just curious." He answered. "But you didn't answer"
"Paybacks a bitch" I smirked, remembering the night I spent in his bunk asking him about Jamie. He just sighed in response. We must've have been here for a few hours because we could see the sky starting to lighten up as the sun rose. I was starting to get tired so we decided to drive back.
When we got back to my house, he helped me inside. My mom was in the kitchen drinking her coffee before she had to go open up the salon.
"Hey guys. Late night?" She asked and I nodded.
"I couldn't sleep so he offered to take me out for a few hours. I'm tired of being cooped up" I yawned.
"You two go get some rest. I'm off to work, call if you need anything" she smiled and kissed my head.
I went into my room on my crutches and stopped as I passed the mirror. My eyes were puffy from being tired and I looked disgusting. As if he read my mind, Stephen wrapped his arms around my waist and said, "you're beautiful" into my ear before giving me a kiss.
I leaned my crutches against the wall and sat down on the bed. He was already laying on his side, watching me with a smile.
I climbed under the covers and moved over to lay against him. As I was just about to fall asleep, I heard my phone buzzing. Jess wanted to FaceTime. I reluctantly answered with "don't you ever sleep?"
She laughed and said, "not today, I'm on my way to go record my part of a new song. So I hear your getting married" she smirked and I could feel my face turn bright red and Stephen sighed.
He moved his face closer so he was in view of the camera and said, "goodnight Jess" before hanging up on her.
"Rude" I stuck my tongue out at him, "so what do they know?" I sighed.
"They know what I said and what you said, that's it. I was talking to John and it just came out and he told everyone in the group chat" he told me. I just nodded, trying to think things through. "You realize that we weren't dating and everyone knows you think getting married is a good idea and now they're all gonna know you're sleeping in my bed at 7am?" I said, waiting for him to put two and two together.
He shrugged and was quiet for a minute. "And for the record, I think 99% of my ideas are terrible ones, with the exception of that"
"What do you mean?" I laughed.
"I don't know, I just think it would work out. We're together all the time, even when you move across the country. We basically live together anyway. I don't know it was dumb, just forget I said anything, okay?" He said, sounding like he was trying not to tumble over his words. Admittedly my heart fell a little, if he was taking it back now, what would have happened if I said yes? I closed my eyes and as I was falling asleep, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist pulling me close to him.
When I woke up it was around 11:30 am. Stephen was already awake, doing something on his phone. I turned my head and gave him a light kiss on his collar bone. He smiled at me, "what do you want to do today?"
"Leaving my bedroom sounds like a good idea"
"We can do that. Where do you want to go?" He asked me. I just shrugged, I didn't have any particular plan but I was tired of just sitting here. "Get dressed and we'll go do something" he gave me a kiss and walked out of my room so I could change.
He took me out to our favorite diner to get some food and then said he wanted to go to his place and change. When we pulled up, he helped me out of the car and unlocked the door. John, Jess, Brian, and Josh were hanging out in the living room laughing. I had missed that so much. It was like being back in high school. I went over closer to them and they seemed excited to see me. They hugged me and kept asking me about my ankle and said to get better soon.
When Stephen appeared next to me, John said, “We need to have a get well party I think”. Everyone agreed, despite my many protests. Honestly I just wanted to spend time with the five of them. “When?” I sighed, giving up.
“Now” Jess and Josh said at the same time. I rolled my eyes. Leave it to them to have a party at noon. They all kept talking over each other, giving each other jobs – cleaning, alcohol, food, etc. Stephen rubbed my back and said, “It’ll be fun. And if you don’t like it we can go hang out in my room or I’ll bring you home”.
“My life’s never boring with the five of you around” I told him, “but I’m gonna need booze”
“I think that can be arranged” he smiled and kissed me on the cheek. John looked at him confused for a second and Stephen shrugged. He must not have told him we were trying again.
She nodded. "Just nauseous"
"Did you take your pill?" She nodded again and held up two fingers. "Let me make you some food. It'll help."
"No. I just want to sleep for a while" she tried to get up but couldn't quiet manage it with her cast so I picked her up and carried her into her room.
"You're only supposed to take one at a time. Don't go to sleep yet baby, I'm gonna get you something to eat." I told her and went in the kitchen. I came back in a little bit later with some chicken and rice to settle her stomach. She was laying down with tears silently streaming down her face. "What's going on with you Kodah?" She shook her head and started taking small bites of the food I gave her. When she was done eating, I grabbed her up and held her tight in my arms.
"What's got you so upset?"
"I'm sick of feeling like this." She said.
"Like what?"
"Not good enough."
"Are you crazy?" I laughed. What the hell was she talking about?
"Not for Brent. Not for you. Not for Morgan. Not for anybody." She said.
"Oh you are way too good for any us. Everyone you meet is lucky to have you in their life"
"Then why doesn't anybody ever stay?" She said into my shirt.
"I did."
"No you didn't. You cheated on me." She shook her head. Not this again.
"I fell in love with this amazing girl. And I made a stupid mistake a long time ago that made me lose her. You were far too good for me"
"Then why do you keep hurting me" she sobbed.
"I'm sorry for everything baby. I never meant to hurt you." I said honestly. She continued to cry into my shirt and eventually drifted off to sleep. I felt terrible. She was the one person I could never be without and I had walked out every time she needed me most. I held her until she woke up.
"Hey. Sorry. You can go home if you want. I told you I didn't need a babysitter" she said, wiping her eyes. I tilted her chin up to look in her eyes, "three years without was hell. I'm not leaving you." I told her and kissed her gently, not sure if she'd push me away. Instead she pulled herself closer to me.
"I really fucking love you." She told me.
"Marry me then." I blurted out. She looked surprised, staring at me for a minute before answering.
"Are you kidding?" She said, sounding confused.
I shook my head. "We might as well be. Look at us. We're nuts without each other. So let's not be without each other."
"We're not even dating Stephen. It's been years, we're not the same as we were" she said. I didn't care. I wanted her and only her. We sat there on her bed, watching something on the tv until her mom came in.
"Hey honey, how are you feeling?" She said coming over to kiss her on the head.
"I'm good" she smiled back.
"I need to run to my house, check on John and everything. I'll be back before you have to go to work" I said, smiling at her mom and she nodded with a smile. "It's time for your medicine. I'll see you soon" I told Dakotah, kissing her cheek before I left.
I went home and turned on my computer. I ordered some photo prints online, while I waited for John to get out of the shower.
"Oh you still live here?" He smirked, walking out of the bathroom. "How Dakotah?"
"I asked her to marry me." I said. His mouth fell open. "Wait are you serious? You're not even dating her! What did she say?"
"That's exactly what she said" I told him.
"Look at you, little Stevie's all grown up. You two are meant for each other. She'll say yes, just give it some time" he smiled, patting me on the shoulder before going downstairs.
Shortly after my phone was buzzing with texts. It was our bands group chat.
John: STEPHEN PROPOSED TO DAKOTAH!
John: crap, I forgot Stephen was part of this group chat. Sorry dude.
Brian: what!
Josh: Finally, congrats man.
Jess: OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU BOTH
Brian: did she say yes???
John: no. But she will.
Josh: seriously? Definitely wasn't expecting that.
Jess: wait, they're not even together for some reason
Brian: they might as well be, look at them!
John: that's why she didn't say yes
I closed out the message, not wanting to see anything else. You can always count on John to blab, but I knew Kodah would've told everyone eventually anyway.
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Dakotah's P.O.V.
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I had taken my meds earlier but they were pretty much worn off. Sleeping was impossible because the pain medicine had me sleeping all day. It was around 3:30 a.m. and Stephen texted me. Want to get out of the house for a little bit? I sent back definitely. He told me to come outside.
Mom, I had to get out the house for a little bit. I'm going crazy in here. Don't worry I'm with Stephen, he'll take care of me. I promise I'll be home soon. Love, Dakotah
I wrote a note for my mom and stuck it the the microwave. When I opened the door, Stephen was on my porch, ready to help me down the steps with my crutches. When we got to the bottom, I looked up. "Whose car is this?" I laughed. There was a white convertible with the top down sitting outside my house.
"I borrowed it from a friend" he smirked. He opened the door for me and put my crutches in the backseat.
"I'm getting real tired of those things" I said pointing to them.
"You won't need them forever" he said, getting into the drivers seat and starting the car.
"Where are we going?" I asked him. He smiled and told me to just wait and see.
About a half hour later, he stopped the car. We were up on a big hill, seemingly in the middle of nowhere. Looking out the windshield, you could see the whole city lit up beautifully.
"One of the few places near us you can actually see the stars" he said. He leaned over me and gave me a kiss on the cheek before pulling the lever to make my seat fly back. He did the same to his own and held my hand as we looked at the sky. The night was cool, and there was soft acoustic music playing quietly on the radio. It was perfect. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed my knuckles.
"What are we doing, Kodah?" He asked me, "do you want to try to be together again or do you want to move on? This on again off again thing isn't really for me"
"I can't move on so i guess I'm stuck with you" I smirked and he frowned at me.
"I try to be romantic and this is the thanks I get" he laughed. I leaned over and kissed him lightly so he knew I was kidding.
"Are you into Morgan?" He asked quietly after a few minutes of silence.
"Depends, are you jealous?" I laughed and I swear I saw him blush.
"No, just curious." He answered. "But you didn't answer"
"Paybacks a bitch" I smirked, remembering the night I spent in his bunk asking him about Jamie. He just sighed in response. We must've have been here for a few hours because we could see the sky starting to lighten up as the sun rose. I was starting to get tired so we decided to drive back.
When we got back to my house, he helped me inside. My mom was in the kitchen drinking her coffee before she had to go open up the salon.
"Hey guys. Late night?" She asked and I nodded.
"I couldn't sleep so he offered to take me out for a few hours. I'm tired of being cooped up" I yawned.
"You two go get some rest. I'm off to work, call if you need anything" she smiled and kissed my head.
I went into my room on my crutches and stopped as I passed the mirror. My eyes were puffy from being tired and I looked disgusting. As if he read my mind, Stephen wrapped his arms around my waist and said, "you're beautiful" into my ear before giving me a kiss.
I leaned my crutches against the wall and sat down on the bed. He was already laying on his side, watching me with a smile.
I climbed under the covers and moved over to lay against him. As I was just about to fall asleep, I heard my phone buzzing. Jess wanted to FaceTime. I reluctantly answered with "don't you ever sleep?"
She laughed and said, "not today, I'm on my way to go record my part of a new song. So I hear your getting married" she smirked and I could feel my face turn bright red and Stephen sighed.
He moved his face closer so he was in view of the camera and said, "goodnight Jess" before hanging up on her.
"Rude" I stuck my tongue out at him, "so what do they know?" I sighed.
"They know what I said and what you said, that's it. I was talking to John and it just came out and he told everyone in the group chat" he told me. I just nodded, trying to think things through. "You realize that we weren't dating and everyone knows you think getting married is a good idea and now they're all gonna know you're sleeping in my bed at 7am?" I said, waiting for him to put two and two together.
He shrugged and was quiet for a minute. "And for the record, I think 99% of my ideas are terrible ones, with the exception of that"
"What do you mean?" I laughed.
"I don't know, I just think it would work out. We're together all the time, even when you move across the country. We basically live together anyway. I don't know it was dumb, just forget I said anything, okay?" He said, sounding like he was trying not to tumble over his words. Admittedly my heart fell a little, if he was taking it back now, what would have happened if I said yes? I closed my eyes and as I was falling asleep, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist pulling me close to him.
When I woke up it was around 11:30 am. Stephen was already awake, doing something on his phone. I turned my head and gave him a light kiss on his collar bone. He smiled at me, "what do you want to do today?"
"Leaving my bedroom sounds like a good idea"
"We can do that. Where do you want to go?" He asked me. I just shrugged, I didn't have any particular plan but I was tired of just sitting here. "Get dressed and we'll go do something" he gave me a kiss and walked out of my room so I could change.
He took me out to our favorite diner to get some food and then said he wanted to go to his place and change. When we pulled up, he helped me out of the car and unlocked the door. John, Jess, Brian, and Josh were hanging out in the living room laughing. I had missed that so much. It was like being back in high school. I went over closer to them and they seemed excited to see me. They hugged me and kept asking me about my ankle and said to get better soon.
When Stephen appeared next to me, John said, “We need to have a get well party I think”. Everyone agreed, despite my many protests. Honestly I just wanted to spend time with the five of them. “When?” I sighed, giving up.
“Now” Jess and Josh said at the same time. I rolled my eyes. Leave it to them to have a party at noon. They all kept talking over each other, giving each other jobs – cleaning, alcohol, food, etc. Stephen rubbed my back and said, “It’ll be fun. And if you don’t like it we can go hang out in my room or I’ll bring you home”.
“My life’s never boring with the five of you around” I told him, “but I’m gonna need booze”
“I think that can be arranged” he smiled and kissed me on the cheek. John looked at him confused for a second and Stephen shrugged. He must not have told him we were trying again.
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