Hospital Beds and Memories

I sighed as I hung up the last ornament that hadn’t broken. The tree still looked great despite the journey it had taken. The lights were already sparkling brightly, the ornaments now also hanging in the branches, creating a festive environment. Well, my surroundings were very Christmasy, but my mood really wasn’t. Of course, I was the only one decorating the tree right now. Nobody offered me any help, not even bothering to make this any better for me. It was the 24th of December and I couldn’t feel the Christmas spirit at all yet.

No, it wasn’t because Jack wasn’t here, because he was. He was sat on the couch, playing with the cat that had caused our beautiful Christmas Tree to fall over just minutes before. We were both upstairs getting ready when there was suddenly a loud crash from downstairs. Both running down to see what it was, we saw Taco standing guiltily next to the tree that was knocked to the floor. I immediately went to clean the whole thing up, picking up the tree and vacuuming all the broken shards. But what did Jack do? Well, I’ll give you a hint. He wasn’t just sitting on the couch in his boxers. No, he was fully dressed, his tight black suit making him look way too hot for words, his hair spiked up perfectly, and his dress shoes already on and tied.

And how did I look? Ha, well let me tell you that as well. My teeth had just been barely brushed, I was still in my pajamas, and my hair was a complete disaster from not being blow dried after I had washed it. So, while Jack looked just plain sexy and irresistible, I looked like somebody you’d probably want to avoid. At least my period had ended the day before, or I would have exploded with rage.

Alex and Lisa were going to show up soon and I was nowhere near done. Now I was going to seem like the one that took ages to get ready! What made it even worse was that this occasion was too big and important for me to do my usual ten-minute routine. I actually needed my time to get ready. Jack could have easily cut down the time it took me to redecorate the entire tree, leaving more than enough time for both of us to make ourselves look presentable, but he didn’t even bother.

Now, you might wonder what this important event may be. Well, it was time for my family’s annual Christmas party. The one we had the year before wasn’t all too grand, only being the family that was really close to us, but normally Christmas meant renting a venue and have the whole extended extended family there. So, it was basically the whole lot: grandparents, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, their partners, their kids, sometimes even their kids, and then there were also some of my grandparent's siblings who showed up. It was an entire family gathering that was way too overwhelming. At least I got to bring some more friends to keep me sane, and I immediately suggested Alex and Lisa because of Jack and to cheer up Cam since Tay couldn’t make it.

Of course, just as I took a step back to look at my work, the doorbell rang. I gave Jack a quick glance to see if he would get up, but he didn’t even seem to notice that somebody was calling us. Rolling my eyes, I walked up to the front door and opened it. Lisa was waiting on the other side, looking even prettier than she normally did. After hearing that this event was formal, she went all out. Her hair had been curled lightly and swept to one shoulder, her makeup accentuated all her features, and the dress she wore showed off her figure, her heels making her legs look great. I had no clue how I was going to make myself up to the standard she was setting.

And here I was, in my pajamas and crazy hair.

She nearly burst out laughing at the sight of me, but I just waved it off. I wasn’t up for it. After she walked in, I saw Alex still standing out on the driveway, staring at and admiring the car my dad had given me. He didn’t even seem to realize that Lisa had rung the doorbell, let alone that she was inside. He was basically just as dazed as Jack was, but about different things. However, Jack actually made an effort to suddenly stand behind me, making me jump when I went to turn around and join Lisa.

He walked out to join Alex, also taking his time to appreciate the sports car once again. I sighed and got the car keys off the key hooks, calling out Jack’s name to try and get his attention, which seemed like quite an impossible task. But somehow, he actually turned around and raised and eyebrow to see what I wanted.

“Be back in half an hour and don’t get arrested.” I threw the keys at him rather than tossed them. Just because I was letting him go out for a bit, did not mean that I forgave him for not helping me at all.

I closed the door before Jack could thank me... if he were even planning on it. If I wanted to be done before they came back, I was going to have to hurry. So, when I turned back towards Lisa, I gestured towards the mess I was. “I’m going to go upstairs and actually get ready. If you want, you can come with me.”

“I don’t have anything better to do, do I?” She joked and followed me up the stairs and into the bedroom, which I’d admit was pretty messy. Our bed was made, but Jack’s clothes were all over the place. At least my part was cleaned up. Same for the bathroom.

“I was actually hoping to be ready right now, but I had to set up the Christmas Tree, so that didn’t really happen,” I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror -- I really had to fix my hair. “Also, sorry for the mess. I’m blaming it on Jack.”

Lisa brushed it off and entered the bathroom along with me. “Did you really just set up your Christmas Tree now?”

I shook my head while realizing my hair wouldn’t be fixed with any hair products. “It’s been up for a while, but it fell down after a certain cat decided it would be cool to do so. So, I had to put it back up while Jack didn’t even offer to help.”

“If Alex did that to me, I’d be so mad. I really don’t get how you guys stay so calm about everything. Alex told me the story of the thing that happened in LA. Like, how do you not get furious at each other?” Lisa asked as she sat down on the lid of the toilet to watch me do whatever I was going to do.

I shrugged, not really knowing why it happened the way it did. “Mainly it’s just not blowing everything up and just hearing each other out before coming to conclusions. But trust me, it doesn’t always work that way. I don’t think he really realizes how annoyed I am this time, but I don’t want to make it known yet because we are going to see my whole extended family, and I don’t want any awkward tension. Maybe it will come up tomorrow after you guys are gone.”

“You do have a point there, but isn’t there still awkward tension if you’re mad at him?”

“Not if I ignore it for now and come back later,” I told her while walking over to the shower and grabbing the shower head. “Now, as for my hair, the only way to fix it is to wet it and blow dry it again.”

----

After we got out of the Uber and thanked the man who had driven us, we walked up to the large fancy hotel where my family had rented a place to hold the Christmas party. Not everybody in my family had as much money as my parents did, many not even close to it, but with so many people coming here, and everybody chipping in, it wasn’t all too expensive. I could already imagine how many people there would be. Kids would be running all over the place, there would be round tables scattered around, countless of groups of people talking loudly, and then there would be me completely lost while surrounded by mostly strangers.

At least I was wearing something I actually remotely felt comfortable in. Rather than wearing a beautiful dress like Lisa, I decided to go for something much different. Instead, I went for some long flowy baby pink pants, a black crop top with lace at the bottom, a cardigan that went nearly down to the floor, black heels and a pink clutch, and I actually did my makeup. It wasn’t neutral like I normally had, I actually did a smokey eye with black and brown eyeshadow and put on some dark teal matte lipstick. Why not just go full out, right? I bought it with Tay, so I didn’t just want to have bought it for no reason. Let’s just say Jack was shocked when he first saw me.

We entered the building and followed the signs towards the room where the party was being held. Everything looked way too fancy; I was afraid to break things just by looking at them. The ceilings were high, the chandeliers big and sparkly, the floors marble, the art expensive. I expected it would literally cost all my savings and more just to spend a night at this hotel. To be fair, I didn’t exactly have too much money in my savings account, but you get what I mean.

“Ireland, is that you? I haven’t seen you in ages!” An older woman with black hair styled in a way many 50-year-old women had, came up to me and hugged me tightly. “Look at you!”

Before I could answer back, her eyes fell on Jack. She moved away from me and shuffled over to him, taking in his appearance as well. “And you must be Jack! It’s nice to meet you.”

Soon after, she told us she had to go somewhere but would be back later. I didn’t really mind, however, because I hadn’t really intended on starting a conversation. Really, all this was about was showing up so that people would see that I still cared about family and that I was still alive. I would have been happy enough just to spend Christmas with my parents and Cam. But that wasn’t going to happen. I was going to see them now, then the next day it would be Jack, Alex, Lisa, and me, and then the next day was it just Jack and me. We weren’t going to see his parents because they were over in Chicago, but we already made up for that by seeing them before Jack left to LA.

“Who was that?” Jack asked me as we finally saw the large room where the chattering of people was the loudest.

“Honestly?” I laughed as we stood at the two doors that were opened widely allowing us to see everybody. “I have no idea. Nice to know my whole family is talking about us. I’m blaming aunt Doreen.”

“That would make sense…” He nodded in agreement and stopped me before I could walk in. “Which grandma am I meeting again? Knight, or whatever Swedish name it was?”

I rolled my eyes at him. “It’s Andersson, and I don’t pronounce it properly either, so don’t worry about it. So, you’re meeting her. I don’t think you’ll even get to meet grandma Knight since I’m not allowed to see her anymore. She has dementia and our memory problems clash. We’ve tried before, but she can only remember the part of my life that I can’t remember.”

“Oh, that doesn’t seem very nice,” Alex frowned before Jack had the opportunity to say anything.

I shrugged in response. I didn’t have that many memories of my Grandma and I rather kept the few I had than replace them by my family having me to drag me out of the room while my Grandma kept going on and on about the life I didn’t know about. Of course, Cam still got to see her, so that was something. To be honest, I was much closer to my grandma on my mom’s side anyway.

“Thank god you guys are here!” Cam came running up to us, sporting a very shiny and glittery silver suit jacket. I immediately wanted to laugh and make a comment about it, but he beat me to it. “Don’t laugh at my jacket, don’t make a comment about my jacket, and don’t even think about my jacket. It wasn’t my choice to wear it, but here I am. So, if you even dare, I will--”

“You will do what?” I snorted, not bothering to obey him. “Bedazzle me with a handful of glitter out of your pocket?”

“Well, aren’t you funny,” he deadpanned while glaring at me. “The only reason I’m wearing this is because Carter thought it would be funny to switch out a couple of things in my suitcase just before I left, this included. The worst part is that this isn’t the worst.”

“I’m more concerned about you even having this thing in your possession. You look like some Brendon Urie wannabe. Are you also going to do the whole shirtless backflip thing up on stage?” I nudged, pointing towards the stage on the right, knowing that Cameron was going to be singing quite a few songs so the music wasn’t only a CD or a band playing without vocals.

“I feel you judging me, and it’s specifically what I asked you not to do.”

“But you look like a Christmas Tree ornament!”

“Ok, you know what,” he pushed me into a direction, making Jack follow me because I was holding his hand, “grandma has been asking me about you, so why don’t you go say hi. Alex and Lisa, you can come with me.”

And with that, Jack and I were left alone while Alex and Lisa happily went along with my brother. They immediately started talking about something, making me wonder when they became so comfortable around each other. Maybe something had happened that night when everybody had gotten so drunk, making them better friends. Who knew my twin would become friends with his idols?

I kept hold of Jack’s hand and saw my grandma sitting at a table with my mom and one of my aunts. Starting my way towards them, I whispered to Jack, “just so you know, my grandma calls me by one of my middle names, Åse, but she’s the only one allowed to do that, so don’t even think about it.”

“Got it.” Jack nodded, but not without making a joke. “No kinky sex using your middle name.”

I elbowed him in the side, making sure he knew I was being serious. While I didn’t really mind that my middle names were names my Grandma had chosen, I didn’t really like people calling me them. Well, my Grandma was an exception because she called me it since my birth. It was just a small thing between her and me. Cam just liked making fun of me for it occasionally.

When Jack and I arrived at the table, my mom was the first to spot us and made our presence know by saying my name out loud. My grandma immediately brightened up at the sound, looking towards me and giving me the biggest smile I had seen in awhile. She stood up just took some time to take in my appearance.

“Åse,” she leaned in to give me a hug, which I was quick to return, “I haven’t seen you in so long!”

“I know,” I mumbled back while I noticed Jack and my mom exchange greetings, “the last time was after I got to leave the hospital after the car accident. That was two years ago! I should have visited, but this year was kind of… busy.”

“I know,” she whispered back and retreated from the hug, “you know you aren’t allowed to leave this world before I do, ok?”

I nodded in response, feeling like I was going to cry, but knowing I shouldn’t. To keep myself distracted and to change the subject, I turned to point at Jack. “This is Jack, my boyfriend.”

“Ah, yes, I heard about you!” She grinned, going in to hug him as well. “You two are so brave.”

Jack and I both knew she was referring to my battle with Leukemia. Although she hadn’t physically been there, I knew my mom was constantly updating her on things. She had been concerned about me and had been wishing for me to get better ever since she found out, which might have been before Jack found out. She had been here for the whole journey.

Although I knew she wanted to know how I was doing, she decided to change the subject. “So, tell me the story of how you met.”

And that’s exactly what Jack and I did. We told her about the day Jack accidentally poured boiling coffee on me and how I had been stupid enough to ask a stranger to follow me; we told her about the first time we properly hung out and that I once again did something strange by staying over at his place; we told her about the day Jack and I got together at the hospital, leaving out the kiss that happened on the day of aunt Doreen’s wedding; we told her about me moving in with Jack after Cam announced he was moving to LA and that Jack warmed up completely to the little kitty he didn’t feel anything for in the beginning; and I even told her about the amazing day Jack had planned out for my last birthday. She really seemed to like him, making Jack feel so much more comfortable and making me feel elated. It was a perfect situation.

After our pretty long conversation ended, we left to go and find where Cam had dragged Alex and Lisa to. Eventually, I spotted them at a table in the back. There was enough space for six people, but only three were occupying it. So, once my fingers were intertwined with Jack again so that we wouldn’t lose each other while making our way to the other side of the room, I made it my destination to get there without any interruptions. I did see many people glancing at me, noticing that I actually did have a boyfriend and that it wasn’t just some rumour somebody had started. To be honest, I didn’t really get why it was such a big deal. Was is so weird for a girl to be single and then finally be in a happy relationship? Were they expecting me to stay single forever, like I had always stated? I mean, I never was against being in a relationship, I just said that it wasn’t so likely.

Before Jack and I got to the table to sit down, however, Cam was up on his feet. He grabbed my wrist and started pulling me in the other direction, the one I just came from, making me let go of Jack. I yelped out in protest, trying to get him to let go of me, but it only made him hold onto me tighter and pull me away faster. I pouted at Jack while he just gave me a questioning look. Well, it seemed like nobody was going to help me out.

“What the fuck!” I whisper-shouted at Cam as he guided me through the masses of people, ignoring some of the nasty looks that were shot in my direction.

“I need you right now,” was all he said to me, “just wait a second. I don’t want to do this here.”

“Well, I feel like a terrible person right now because I invited Alex and Lisa and I haven’t spent any time with them yet.”

“They were fine around me, and I’m pretty sure they’re fine with Jack right now,” Cam argued and pulled me to where a cloakroom was, surrounding us with jackets from different members of my family.

“Ok, well, then tell me what you ‘need’ me so badly for,” I rolled my eyes. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to help him, I just didn’t see the need of dragging me away just when I had arrived. I didn’t want to have to make my way back through my judging family.

He took a deep breath and looked behind him to check if nobody followed us. Before I could ask him once again why my help was required, he took something out of the pocket of his over-the-top jacket. “I need you to keep this for me for the time being. I’m not exactly good at hiding things and I don’t want to keep it on me the entire time just to lose it.”

My eyes went wide as I took the small red velvet box from him. I knew exactly what I expected to be in the box, but I didn’t just want to assume things. “Cam… what is this?”