If You're Going Through Hell

"So, the little twit actually left you, hmm?"

"Fuck off, Crowley." Rachel, Ivy's partner--only in love, not in hunting--just walked out the door. She came with Castiel to see that Ivy was brought back from the dwelling of a coven of witches, where she'd been held captive for a month. The witches made her sick with a disease that's slowly wearing down her body, effectively ending her hunting career. The disease can't be healed by grace or by any other spell, so she's pretty much screwed. When Rachel was sure that Ivy was safe at home in the bunker, she broke off their relationship, saying she couldn't handle Ivy's illness, not right now. With big sad eyes that made Ivy sick to her stomach, Rachel apologized profusely, saying they'd still be friends.

"With friends like you," Ivy said calmly, "who needs enemies?" When Rachel didn't respond, Ivy sent her away with an emotionless, "Go away, Rachel," turning toward the files she was organizing with shaky hands. And Rachel left.

"Filing?" Crowley asks, approaching her slowly. "I'd think, in your condition, you'd be doing something more fun than working."

She slowly shakes her head as bile rises in her throat. "We can't all be leisurely as you, Crowley. We're not all gifted with all the time in the world. There are things that need to be done, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna fuck around until I die."

The demon pauses a half o' foot away to her left. "If it's gifts you want," he says, and she can feel his eyes boring into the side of her face, "call me jolly ol' St. Nick, child."
"What the hell are you talking about, Crowley?" she asks, frowning as she tries to think if what he could mean.

"You're so smart, love. Figure it out."
"...The gift of time?" she asks, remembering what she said--'We're not all gifted with all the time in the world.'

"Give the lady a cigar," he replies through a smirk, producing an actual Cuban from his suit jacket. She recognizes the smell, as the memory of a time from long ago passes through her mind, from when the demon king, still a crossroads demon at the time, kidnapped Ivy and blew cigar smoke at her face. Her eyes remain on the one he holds now when she speaks in a dead voice.

"What exactly are you saying, Crowley."

Maybe it's the defeat already present in her tone and her stance, maybe it's his higher level of humanity that sets him apart from most demons, maybe both; but when Ivy's eyes lift to meet his, empathy has softened his features.

"I'm saying," he says, slipping the cigar into his suit jacket, "I want to give you immortality." She takes a step back, deciding they're too close.

"You want my soul. I'm not stupid, Crowley."

"No, you're NOT stupid. And that is why you know that this is not about adding another soul to my kingdom. You try to deny it, but you know I care about you, you annoying little human." He takes a step toward her, reaching out for her hand. She let's him take it, nearly all out of fight. "And I can't stand to see you in this state. You're strong, you're a fighter. You're not a SECRETARY," he says, spitting the last word. "Take this deal, Ivy. I won't put you through torture, won't make you perform it. You'll have free will, you'll be under my protection." They're so close now. Ivy can smell his aftershave, one of the very human things about him. "Ivy, please." Her eyes close for a second, his passionate words overwhelming her. And a new voice speaks up.

"Ivy?"

She opens her eyes and turns her head to see Emma in the doorway to the library. "Yeah."
"Come eat."

Ivy tears herself out of Crowley's orbit, to follow her sister to the kitchen. They don't speak of what just happened, and Ivy believes that Emma heard Crowley's proposal.

~~~

Four months go by, during which Ivy does paperwork and filing while Emma goes hunting with Cas and Garth; and spends as much time as possible with Emma and their friends, having as much fun as they can. Emma tells her many times that it's okay to sleep downstairs, she doesn't have to go up to her room when she's in pain. But Ivy's in pain all the time, and she won't stop doing normal everyday things until she doesn't have to. She won't just give up like that.

"Ivy."

She looks up at the sound of the pain-filled voice, to see Crowley watching her lean against the kitchen counter, sobbing. She cries often, whenever Emma leaves, to release all the pent up misery and fear. "What do you want, Crowley?" she asks, wiping furiously at her eyes before continuing to cut vegetables for dinner. He walks up to her, slowly, and places a hand over hers, ceasing her movements. She looks up at him, anger in her eyes and pain in her heart. He watches her for a moment before responding.

"Want company?"

She does. Crowley's personality has always meshed well with her own, and she enjoys being around him--even if she won't say so. Ivy nods, and goes back to preparing dinner. And he doesn't stop her, even though he can tell she is in pain; because despite all his falts, the demon knows her well, and he respects her.

Four more months pass, where Ivy is no longer capable of fooling anyone. She still does as much as she can, shrugging off Emma's protests, fighting with her at times, but her sister never gets tired of her, never stops being there for her. Crowley visits sometimes, during Emma's hunts. Ivy is thankful to her sister, and to her demon friend.

During the next four months, Ivy can no longer use the stairs. She sleeps in the Impala, and her sister no longer goes on hunts. Friends no longer visit. Crowley is neither seen nor heard. And Ivy's smile no longer reaches her eyes. Ivy stops hiding her tears. Emma cries alot now, too, but she doesn't know her big sister knows, and that it makes the elder cry that much more. Ivy hasn't mentioned Rachel once since she abandoned her, but in these days, she finds herself thinking about her more than before. She wonders if Rachel thinks about her. If she asks about her. One night, when Emma is making dinner while Ivy sits at the table, the elder decides to ask.

"Has Rachel asked about me? At all?"

Emma slams down the box of pasta on the counter, making Ivy jump. "Fuck her," is her angry answer. "You don't need her. She doesn't deserve to have anything to do with you." She goes back to what she was doing. Ivy piles her sister's current pain on top of herself to sit with everything else on her shoulders, weighing herself down even further.

Four more months go by with Ivy resting, mostly outdoors, with her sister by her side. At the end, they hold onto eachother, as Ivy's breaths come slowly, barely there.

"Ivy," Emma says softly. "Take the deal."

Ivy knew. Deep down, all along, she knew that she would take the deal, if she had her sister's blessing. Crowley appears as relief floods Ivy's body, and he stands at a respectful distance while the younger Winchester speaks to the elder, who communicates with her eyes.

"I'm not saying goodbye. This isn't goodbye. You'll never lose your humanity, Ivy, not for good. You'll find yourself, and we'll go back to normal." Ivy agrees, and her eyes close as her sister presses a kiss to her forehead, and hugs her tightly as she dares. Despite Emma's care, the hug still causes her sister pain. Ivy can't wait for the pain to stop. Crowley walks up to them, takes Ivy from the safety of her sister's arms, and teleports away.

"Ivy," he tells her, looking down into her eyes. "I need you to agree to the deal before I can do anything. Think you can manage one word, darling?"

Ivy's mouth open shakily, and she breathes the word, "Yes." Immense relief floods the demon's features.

"Atta girl," he says proudly, and leans down to brush a chaste kiss over her lips. He holds Ivy until her last breath.

~~~

"Ive-Ives?"

Ivy's eyes open to the sound of her sister's small voice, to stare up at huge puffy clouds partially covering a bright blue sky. The breeze is cool and smells earthy. Ivy can't believe how incredible this day feels. A smile lights her face. Something's different.... Okay, alot of things are different. Her senses are sharper, and she feels so strong. Alarm shoots through her. STRONG? Her muscles have been deteriorating, she's not STRONG. And...there's no pain. She's ALWAYS in pain. She thinks...very hard...and remembers her last day alive. She's a demon.

"Ivy," her sister says softly, and her head rolls to meet green eyes and freckled cheeks.
"Emma," Ivy grins, and sits up. "I'm better! The pain's finally gone!"

"I'm so happy for you, Ivy," Emma says, and her body twitches forward slightly...like she wants to hug Ivy, but stopped herself. Ivy carefully pulls her sister into a not too tight hug. After a moment, Emma returns the embrace, and Ivy chuckles lightly.

"Used to be you having to be careful with me."

Emma gives a soft laugh in response, and buries her face in Ivy's shoulder.

When they release eachother a few minutes later, Ivy looks around, running her hands through the grass on which they sit. "Where's Crowley?" Ivy knows the demon wouldn't just leave her here.
"He'll be here soon. He...he says you need time away to learn about your new life, before we can live together again. Like we thought."

"Yeah." Ivy looks down. "I don't want to leave."

"I know."

Ivy idly plays with the grass for awhile, feeling a calm she's never before experienced. "But I won't be gone long."

"Yeah. I know."

Ivy smiles at her. "You'll have Cas. He'll protect you."

"I don't need protection. But yeah, he will." Emma pauses before adding, "And Garth'll be around." Ivy grins. She totally supports her sister and that goofball getting together.

"He'd better be."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Emma asks.

"Nothing, nothing." Ivy hugs her sister again, and when they sit back, Crowley is standing nearby.

"Ready to go, love?" he asks. Ivy gives her sister one more smile, and stands up to join the king of Hell.

"Ivy, wait," Emma says, and tosses something to her sister. Ivy catches it, and looks down at the two keys on their purple ring.

"You need a car, Bem," she says, looking back up at Emma, who still sits on the ground. "I don't."

"It's not my car, Ivy. And I've got my bike."

"You can't ride a motorcycle in the rain."

"That's where Cas and Garth come in," Emma says with a smile and a wink. "I'll be fine. Take your car."

A smile stretches Ivy's lips, and she nods. "See ya soon, Bem."

"See you soon. Love you."

"Love you, too." As Crowley apparates away with her, Ivy realizes her words were true. She does love her sister. She can still feel love. Her humanity's not gone, just like Emma predicted, while Ivy didn't share her optimism.

"Well, darling," Crowley says, as Ivy stares at the setting sun, and she looks up at him. "Let's go take a howl at that moon." She goes with him; to learn, to experience...to live.

~~~

Ivy did quite well at her first kill. She discovered quickly that enough humanity still exists within her to keep her from hurting people who don't deserve it. But when she learned what that man did to that boy.... She danced with his entrails afterward, while Crowley watched her, his expression fond. He indulges her like a child, giving her whatever she wants, taking her wherever she wishes to go. They're a team, never without eachother. Most of the other demons seem to find her new state of being amusing, exciting. Some objected.... Crowley let her kill them.

"Hurry up, Crowley!" Ivy calls to the king over her shoulder, as she dances toward the karaoke bar.

"Why are you so slow?"

"Centuries of immortality bring patience, pet."

"I think you're just old," she teases him, and crosses the last few yards to the bar's front entrance. They could teleport everywhere, but they prefer to drive and walk when there's no pressing time limit. Crowley protested in the beginning, but he came to enjoy the longer trips. Ivy secretly hopes his change of heart had to do with her. When he reaches her at the door, Crowley pulls her against him.
"Feisty tonight, are we?" he asks, his face close to hers. She rolls her eyes and shoves him away. He's always flirting, lightly manhandling her. She's used to it by now, after six months.

"You always are, Crowley," she retorts, before spinning on her heel to walk into the bar. He follows, chuckling darkly.

By the time they call Ivy's name to go onstage, she's had nine Jacks to Crowley's two cocktails. Damn, she loves getting to drink as much as she wants, as a demon.

"Go sing a song for me, princess," Crowley tells her, starting on a scotch. Ivy ignores him, moving through the tables and onto the stage.

"I used to come home late and not a minute too soon
Barking like a dog, howling at the moon
You'd be mad as an ol' red hen, up all night wonderin' where I been
I'd fall down and say come help me honey
You laughed out loud, I guess you thought it was funny
I sobered up, and I got to thinkin'
Girl you ain't much fun since I quit drinkin'

Now I'm paintin' the house and I'm mendin' the fence
I guess I gone out and lost all my good sense
Too much work is hard for your health
I could've died drinkin', now I'm killing myself
Now I'm feedin' the dog, sackin' the trash
It's honey do this, honey do that
I sobered up, and I got to thinkin'
Girl you ain't much fun since I quit drinkin'

Now I'm fixin' the sink and I'm mowin' the grass
You made me a list and I'm bustin' my wheeeeeel
All broke down, tail's been draggin'
It's a tough ol' life up here on the wagon
Now I'm feedin' the dog, sackin' the trash
It's honey do this, honey do that
I sobered up, and I got to thinkin'
Girl you ain't much fun since I quit drinkin'
Yeah, I sobered up, and I got to thinkin'
Girl you ain't much fun since I quit drinkin'"

It sure is fun when the crowd starts singing with you. Ivy steps off the stage, and nearly runs into someone, just standing there. "Hey, watch it, buddy," she warns. And her eyes focus on the person before her. "Rachel?"

"Ivy," she says, eyes wide. Looks like she's seen a ghost.

"You look different. Change your hair?" Obviously. It's red. Looks terrible on her. Plus, she's gained, like, thirty pounds.

"...I thought you were dead."

"Nah, sweetheart," Ivy smirks. "I'm very much alive."

Rachel's eyes widen impossibly further. "You're a demon."

"Give the lady a cigar," Ivy says, her lips stretching slowly into a dark grin. Rachel backs away a few steps.

"Can we talk outside?"

"So you can kill me?" Ivy asks, amused.

"No. I'm not going to kill you, Ivy. I never tried to kill CROWLEY, I'm not going to kill you."

"You didn't try to kill Crowley because you knew you couldn't."

"And you can't kill her, either," Crowley says casually, and Rachel spins to face him. "So you'd best not try." Rachel steps carefully to her left, so that she's no longer between the two demons, and she can keep both of them within her line of vision.

"Please, Ivy," she says. "Please come outside with me. I just want to talk. I NEED to talk to you, Ivy."
"I do believe I like it when you beg," Ivy taunts with an easy smile. She looks to her partner. "I'll be back soon," she says, throwing a finger in his direction. "Ge'me another drink."

"Yes, ma'am," he replies, giving her a sparkling smile in return and watching her leave with Rachel.
Outside, the women face eachother. They don't say anything for awhile. Ivy looks bored. Rachel looks anxious.

"I understand why you made the deal," Rachel says, finally breaking the silence.

"I understand why you left."

"You do?"

"Nah, just fuckin' around," she scoffs. "I don't care why you left."

"Did you care before you turned?"

"I had more on my mind than your pathetic exit from my life, Rachel."

She winces. "Ivy, I'm sorry. I fucked up, majorly. I tried to make it up to you a week later, and more times after that, but your sister wouldn't let me--"

"Don't blame her for ANYTHING!" Ivy didn't mean to let her composure crack, but hearing Emma being brought into this just pissed her off.

Rachel raises her hands defensively. "Okay, okay," she says quickly. "I'm sorry. What happened is my fault. I should have been there for you."

"Yeah, you're right about that," Ivy says as she crosses her arms, back to her casual, smug self. "So. Is that all? 'Cause I'd like to get back to my partner."

"Crowley's your 'partner' now? Doesn't he, like, own you?"

"No one owns me. You haven't been around, you don't know anything about my situation."

"Okay, that's true. But, he IS your king, right?"

"Technically. We don't care about that, though. We respect eachother as equals." She let's her head fall to the side, regarding Rachel with a mockingly thoughtful expression. "You don't know about respect, though, do you."

"Ivy--"

"Or decency, or love," Ivy continues, as if Rachel didn't start to speak.

"Ivy, I...." She doesn't finish, standing there helplessly. It's pathetic. Ivy shakes her head in disgust and turns to go back inside. Rachel dashes forward and grabs her arm. As Ivy is turning to eye the offending hand, Crowley appears to remove it.

"You will leave us, now," he tells her. His tone is unconcerned as usual, but his red eyes hold a terrible warning. Rachel does as he says. He walks around Ivy to open the door, and waves a hand in gesture. "Shall we?"

"We shall," she smiles at him, and re-enters the bar.

"Enjoying yourself, darling?" Crowley asks, watching Ivy swing around a telephone pole she grips with one hand. She grins and makes one more go 'round, to swing into his arms. He chuckles, holding her steadily against him. After a moment, he asks in that gentle voice only she gets to hear, with that soft smile reserved only for her, "What are we doing, love?"

"Wha'd'you mean?"

"You hug me and you flirt. You jump into my arms, but when I, try to..." he says, leaning in, and she pulls back a few inches. "When I try to kiss you, you pull away," he finishes.

"You're just messing around, right?"

"No, pet, I'm not."

"Right." She tries to pull back, but he keeps a firm hold.

"Pretend I was. You've never had a problem with just messing around before. You've had many casual affairs. What's different about me?"

"I...I don't know. I'm never gonna be monogamous or anything, but...we're not casual, Crowley."

His soft smile grows just slightly, and he brings up one hand to cup the side of her face, stroking his thumb across her cheek. "No, we're not. We're epic partners in crime. We're enemies made friends." A few beats pass, and he continues. "I don't want anything casual from you. I want everything, and I want it to mean something."

"Crowley--" she starts, and he cuts her off with a slow, burning kiss that blanks her mind and melts her muscles, but he holds her up. When he pulls back, she stares at him for a brief moment before yanking his back to her, kissing him deeply and hard. She feels their location change, and the smell of brimstone tickles her nose and excites her blood as they fall onto silk sheets. Ivy and Crowley, Knight and King, together in the field are like a violent, raging storm of power, passion and blood. Together in the bedroom, they're the same way.

~~~

Ivy is draped contentedly over Crowley, her head on his chest, eyes closed as he strokes her hair and back.

"I do wish you'd told me sooner how easy it is to calm you, kitten," he says, referring to the affliction that is her terribly sensitive skin--when someone starts petting her, it's VERY difficult to move through the sensations.

"Mmmph," is her response, and he chuckles. It's difficult to speak, as well.

"Unfortunately, it's almost time we get to work," he tells her, and when Ivy makes a dissatisfied sound, he kisses her hair and adds, "Five more minutes."

"Hmmmm," she sighs happily.

~~~

"What's on the agenda for today?" Ivy asks, watching Crowley get dressed.

"First off, we have to visit some bratty creatures for some information."

She instantly perks up. "Will torture be involved?" Ivy knows Crowley wouldn't take her to hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it, so she let's herself get excited.

He chuckles low in his throat, bending to look her in the eyes, his fingers taking hold of her chin. "There just might be. Would you like that?" Her eyes shine black with bloodlust, and his lips curve into a half smile. "My eager pet." He presses a kiss to her forehead and straightens up. "We'll go as soon as you're ready."

Ivy dresses quickly in her holey white half-shirt, black denim shorts, and black leather boots, before taking Crowley's hand so they can apparate. He looks her over with satisfied eyes.

"Most gorgeous Knight in all of Hell," he states proudly, before taking them to the car.

~~~

"Oh, please talk to me, please?" Ivy taunts the man bound to a chair before her. "I'm just CRAVING some stimulating conversation."

"Leave us alone," he begs, glancing quickly right and left at his two companions. "We don't know anything."

"Then what good are you?"

Ivy's halfway covered the first man's upper body in cuts and burns when she hears a surprised intake of breath.

"Ivy?"

Her head jerks to the right to see Emma standing in the doorway of the apartment.

"Ivy!" Emma runs to her sister, who drops the knife she holds and takes a couple steps back. Emma ignores everything but Ivy, pulling her into a tight hug.

"Emma, don't be so careless," ivy says quietly, stiffly. "You're getting blood on yourself."

Emma pulls back enough to look up at her. "I don't care." She holds onto her with a grip that would be painful for a human, as if using her sister as an anchor, as she looks warily over at the three bound men. "Tell me what's going on here."

"We need information. They're being less than forthcoming. We're doing what needs to be done."
Emma looks surprised at the matter-of-fact explanation, but continues to push down the unpleasant emotions this interaction is causing within her. She nods and steps back, before calling, "Cas." The angel appears and looks at Ivy with big eyes. She smiles at him.

"Hey, Cas."

"Hello, Ivy," he says carefully.

"Cas," says Emma, bringing his attention back to herself. "Please help Ivy get the information she needs from these men." Ivy feels a tickle of irritation at her fun being ended, but it's overwhelmed by everything else this encounter is making her feel. Castiel nods and steps forward to fix the first man with his gaze.

"Please," he says. "I do not want to hurt you. Simply tell them what they need to know." His presence, both calming and intimidating, gets through to the man, and he spills everything he knows. The angel turns to look between Ivy, and the demon king watching with interest from a corner. "Satisfied?" he asks calmly, and Ivy looks to Crowley, who gives a subtle inclination of his head. She turns back and nods to Castiel.

"Thanks, Cas."

He gives a Curt nod in return, and looks to Emma.

"Cas, why don't you tell Garth to come here?" the younger Winchester asks, reaching behind herself to take Ivy's hand.

The angel disappears, and reappears with Garth soon after. The man walks cautiously to Emma, while keeping nonchalant. He was always good at that, Ivy muses.

"Hey, Emma," he says, and takes her other hand as his eyes move to her sister. "Ivy. It's been such a long time. It's so great to see you."

"Is it, Garth?" she asks, and sees his wariness intensify. Ivy knows she shouldn't tease her friends, but it's amusing.

"Yeah, it is. You look good. How are you?"

"Better than ever." She slowly tilts her head to the side. "Would it make you feel better if I took my hand back from Emma?" When he doesn't respond, she adds, "I'm not the one holding on, you see. If that helps you."

"I don't have a problem with it," he lies in that amiable way of his. Always the peacekeeper.

"Ivy, now that you have what you wanted," says Emma, "why don't we let these guys go and we can catch up?" Ivy looks to Crowley, who snaps his fingers, making the men disappear. "Where did they go?"

"Away," Crowley answers, stepping out from the shadows. "You want to talk to my Knight, you'll have to wait until she's finished her duties for the day."

"You're a Knight of Hell?" Castiel asks, his usually monotonous voice raised slightly.

"One of my best," Crowley answers with a proud smirk, running a hand down Ivy's back. "Make your plans for the evening so we can get back to work."

"Come to the bunker?" Emma asks, her hopeful eyes trained on Ivy's face.

"Yeah. I'll come by tonight."

Emma gives her sister one more fierce hug, before stepping back and allowing Garth to lead her out of the house. Her eyes remain on Ivy until she rounds the door frame--as do Castiel's unnerving blues, until he disappears.

"You could take off early, you know," Crowley says.

"Yeah," Ivy answers. "I know." She picks up her knife. "What's next?"

"Soul collecting."

"Perfect."

~~~

Ivy pulls up to the bunker at 5, with Crowley riding shotgun as always. She turns off the car, and just sits for a moment.

"Do you want me to come in?" Crowley eventually asks, taking it upon himself to break the silence.
"Do you think you should?"

"I suppose it COULD be a trap."

"That's what I'm thinking."

"If we both go in, they could catch us both, maybe kill me. If you go in alone, and they catch you, I could rescue you." When Ivy doesn't respond, he reaches over and squeezes her hand. "I WILL rescue you," he tells her with complete earnestness. "If it IS a trap, they will not have you for long." Ivy gives a small smile and a nod.

"I'll text you a code word every hour."

"What shall our words be?"

"...Blood, rain, kareoke."

Crowley shakes his head in amusement and pulls her into a deep kiss. "Have a good time, love."
Ivy let's herself into the bunker and looks around. The place is exactly the same as when she and Emma--mainly the former--decorated it. There aren't even any dishes or trash anywhere, leading her to believe that her sister must have cleaned up in anticipation of Ivy's arrival. Emma was always bad about cleaning. Castiel appears, and Ivy gives a half smile.

"Hey, Cas."

"Hello."

"So, uh...how've ya been?"

"I've been well."

"Good."

"...Why are you visiting now?"

"...Emma asked me to."

"You weren't supposed to see her until you were ready. If you were ready, why did it take her happening upon you to visit?"

"I've been planning on coming to see her since yesterday. Running into you guys was a coincidence. What's with the third degree, Cas? Aren't you happy to see me?"

The angel takes his time answering. "I am. But I also am not." He disappears, leaving a slight sting in Ivy's heart. She brushes it off easily, though, when Emma appears.

"Ivy! I'm so glad you're here! Garth and I were making food. Do you still eat?"

"Hell, yeah. Even more now that I don't have to worry about gaining weight."

They laugh, as Emma reaches out and grabs her hand to lead her to the kitchen.

"Garth! Ivy's here!" Emma calls as they enter.

"Hey, Poison," he says with a smile. "Don't worry, didn't forget you're vegan. I'll take care of the food, you two can chill 'til it's ready."

"Are you the one who cleaned the bunker?" Ivy asks him.

"Usually, but Emma helped this time," he says, smiling indulgently at the younger Winchester.

"I'm not THAT messy," Emma says, delivering the familiar lie with rolling eyes.

"Sure you're not, my princess of darkness," Garth says, pulling her to his side to kiss her cheek, ignoring her very pissy-cat-like struggles.

"I'm going to the bathroom," she huffs, and hurries from the room with a quickly blooming blush. Chuckling softly, Garth goes back to stirring one of the pots on the stove.

"You're really good with her," Ivy says with a smile.

Garth glances at her. "I do my best."

"Do you love her?"

His smile deepens. "I do."

"I was hoping you two'd get together."

"Really?" he asks in surprise.

"I knew you'd be good for her."

Stepping toward her, he says, "I'm honoured," and pulls her into a hug, which she returns. "I'm glad your back, Ivy." When Garth steps back to return to the stove, he adds, "I hope you'll visit alot. Everyone's really missed you."

"I will. I didn't mean to stay away so long. I just...."

"I get it," he says, and she believes him. He's always been the epitome of empathy and understanding.

"Ivy!" Emma calls, and Ivy follows her voice to the living room.

"What's up?"

"Wanna play Uno until dinner's ready?"

"You never wanted to play Uno before. I had to teach Cas so I'd have someone to play with."

"Well, I wanna play now." She plops down onto the couch. "Come lose."

"You're on, oh prideful one."

~~~

"I AM THE CHAMPIOOOON!" Ivy proclaims, standing on the coffee table with her fists high in the air.

"How many times did ya win?" Garth asks from the doorway.

"TEN OUTTA TWEEEEELVE!"

"Well, sounds like you two worked up an appetite. Come on, food's ready."

"Food," the sisters gasp excitedly, and race for the kitchen.

~~~

"I'm not nearly as good a hunter as you two," Garth says, as they sit in the living room for dessert, "but I do my best. Emma picks up the slack."

"I'm glad to have you there," Emma says, giving his shoulder a comforting shake.

"Well, you guys have Cas if anything gets out of hand," Ivy says. "Who's doing the desk work?"

"One of Bobby's friends took over," Emma answers. "He's cool. Does a good job."

"Everything seems to be runnin' smoothly," Ivy says, her eyes on the knife in her hand with which she plays absent-mindedly.

"Yeah...but we miss you," Emma says. "It'd be better if you were here." Garth places a hand over hers, softly says her name, and she quickly adds, "But we know you're doing what you need to do. We're happy you're not sick anymore."

"She's still sick," Castiel speaks up, from where he must have just appeared near the doorway. "Just with a different disease."

"Cas--"

"The best disease," Ivy says with a lifted head revealing her black eyes, cutting off Emma's admonishment.

"Castiel, it's still Ivy," Garth says. "Like it was still me when I was a werewolf. She's not that different."

"I can see the difference," the angel argues. "I can see it quite clearly."

"I don't need your crap, Feathers," Ivy says, standing from the couch.

"Can Crowley's new pet kill find it in herself to kill a friend?" Castiel asks. Ivy snarls, hands curling into fists at her sides.

"Cas, stop!" Emma shouts.

"It's time for me to go, Emma," Ivy says, her voice low, controlled. "I shouldn't be here. I'm sorry."
"No, Ivy, don't leave like this, please," Emma says. "We can work through this, everyone just needs time."

"Time's not gonna change things, Bem," Ivy tells her, black eyes still on the angel. "I'll still be a demon. He still won't accept me."

"You don't have to be a demon," Castiel says. "We can cure you. You'll come back with the disease gone."

"How do you know?"

"Such a spell cannot withstand dying, being made demon, and the cure. You will be human, and healthy."

Ivy shakes her head. "Human, and vulnerable to another spell, another disease. No. I won't go back to that."

"Ivy," says Emma, "maybe you'd be happy once you're cured. Maybe you'd feel differently."

"We can cure her, Emma," Castiel says, latching on to the younger Winchester's sign of agreement. "She doesn't have to like it now, but she'll thank us for it later."

"Emma, no," Ivy says in a firm voice, already moving around the couch to get to the door.

"But Castiel might be right."

"He's not right, Emma! I don't want the cure!"

"Emma, she's right," Garth speaks up gently. "Let her be."

"That would be a mistake, Emma," Castiel says. Ivy makes a break for the door, but Castiel flies across the room to restrain her. She screams in terror and rage, fighting his hold with all she has.

"Cas, stop!" Garth hollers. Suddenly, the angel is thrown off of the demon, and she looks up to see Crowley standing there in all his regality, wearing an expression of disapproval.

"I gave you a few extra minutes after the hour to send the text, love," he tells Ivy, eyes on everyone else, "before I came rushing in. A good thing I didn't wait any longer."

"She's ours, Crowley," Castiel scowls from where he was tossed by the flick of the king's wrist. "Leave her here."

"What is it with you, always classifying her as property?" Crowley asks. "She doesn't belong to YOU. She doesn't belong to ME. She belongs to no one but herself. She's proven that." He holds out a hand toward Ivy, and she hurries to his side to be held under his protective arm. "We'll be going now. It's a shame Ivy can't trust you. I sincerely hoped she could come here and be happy." He exits through the door he'd thrown open upon his entrance, his arm still tight around her.

"Ivy, I'm sorry!" Emma cries, running out the door as Ivy and Crowley get into the car.

"We really didn't mean for this to happen, Ivy," Garth says from behind Emma. "I'm sorry."

"I believe you, Garth," Ivy tells him through her window, starting the car. "Take care of Emma, okay?" She speeds away without looking back.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Crowley asks.

"Later. Thanks."

The king nods and turns on the radio. Ivy gives a tight smile of appreciation, and he pats her knee.

Ivy takes out her anger on her victims tonight, being particularly brutal and sadistic. After hours of observing, Crowley speaks up.

"Not to say you're not turning me on terribly with all his mindless violence. But perhaps it's time we talk about what you're feeling."

"Demons," strike, "aren't," slash, "supposed to feel," stab, "this much!" crush. She let's out a scream of deep frustration, and is immediately wrapped up in Crowley's arms. She buries her face in his shoulder and cries in mostly silence for a good long while. When she's finished, Crowley dries her face with his handkerchief.

"You're not a normal demon, love."

"I wanna be," she says quietly. "I don't want to feel a thing."

"You want to tell the truth now?" Crowley asks patiently, petting her hair.

"...I want to keep my humanity. I want my sister and friends to accept me."

"I know, pet," he says, pulling her head back to his shoulder. "I know."

"...Do you think they ever will?"

"...I hope so, love. I do. I want you to be happy."

Later that night, Ivy and Crowley lie on the hood of the car, looking up at the stars.

"Do you wish you never started to get back your humanity, Crowley?"

"Nah. I like having some of it. I like feeling. Especially for you."

She smiles as their hands find eachother on the cool metal.

"Good."

A month goes by after her visit at the bunker, and Ivy is doing the best she can to keep her mind off what could be. She works even harder to keep her mind off the truth--that what could have been cannot be, because of Castiel. She doesn't want to hurt him, and she wasn't going to back at the bunker. Why didn't he see that? Why couldn't he see that she still loves her sister and her friends? 'Bird Brain is close-minded,' Crowley told her. 'Comes with the package of being an angel.' He's right. But Castiel's mind has opened so much since he pulled her from Hell years ago. Maybe he can come to accept her new state of being, in time.

Right now, Ivy's finishing up some business solo. It's rare that she works without Crowley, but he has things he has to do for which she just can't be present. She stands straight, legs spread apart as she brushes off her hands. "Job well done," she says to herself.

"I'm not gonna lie. That was hard to watch."

Ivy turns to face the voice. "Rachel."

"It's hard to get you alone." She nods her head toward where the dead bodies were a moment ago. "Is that fun for you? Killing people? You used to save people."

"Don't be so naive, Rachel. The world's full of bad beings, human and not. Only difference in my hunting these days is, I clean up the human ones now."

"...I'm not surprised you only kill the bad ones. You still have some humanity in you, then."

"Enough of it. What do you want, Rachel?"

"You," she says, taking a couple steps closer.

Ivy snorts. "You've gotta be kiddin' me."

"Ivy, I've grown since I did what I did to you. I know I can make you happy. Just give me a chance."

"You've NEVER made me happy, Rachel. You're nothing but exhaustion and drama and craziness--and not in a good way."

"So," she responds tightly. "What? Crowley makes you happy now?"

"He does. Very happy."

"If you were human you wouldn't want him anymore."

"I've wanted him for years. Since he and I met, we've been moving toward this. My state of being doesn't change anything."

It takes Rachel a moment to speak. "Do you hate me now?"

"I don't hate you, Rachel. I don't feel anything for you."

"Oh?" She pulls a knife from her back pocket, raises it with the blade pointed toward herself.

Her composure breaks. "Rachel--" She flies forward to grab Rachel's hands before they can drive the knife through her belly. And now there are cuffs around Ivy's wrists. "What--?!" Rachel drops to her knees and hooks another set to Ivy's ankles, connects the pairs with a short chain. Ivy can't move, and she can't break the metal. "What is this?" she demands, as Rachel stands back up. "Rachel!" She's panicking, and when Ivy panics, she becomes very angry.

"You can't break through these. Reinforced with sigils." She reaches up to run a lock of Ivy's hair slowly between her fingers. "I knew you cared about me."

"Yeah? Now I wanna kill you, how 'bout that?" she says with bared teeth and black eyes.

"I'll see those blue eyes again soon," she says, and calls, "Castiel!"

Ivy's eyes open wide. "Rachel, Rachel, no, come on--" Their location changes. They're in a basement with Castiel.

"I'm sorry, Ivy," he tells her.

"I can tell you mean that, Feathers," Ivy says darkly. "But it doesn't mean SHIT." Rachel pushes Ivy back into a chair, and binds her to it.

"I suppose we should begin," Castiel says.

"Well," Rachel starts, walking over to face a wall behind Castiel, "I was thinking. Maybe it'd be better for me if Ivy wasn't cured." A familiar scent hits Ivy's nose, and Rachel starts drawing something on the wall.

"What do you mean?" Castiel asks in bewilderment, turning toward her.

"Maybe it'd be better for me if she stayed a demon. Hooked on my blood." She slams her hand against the wall, and Castiel disappears in a blinding light.

"Cas!" Ivy roars. "Shit," she hisses, beginning to feel fear for one of the very few times since becoming a demon. Rachel turns toward her with that sweet, alluring smile that used to make Ivy melt. She walks slowly toward her, bends down, and cups the side of Ivy's face.

"I have you now," Rachel murmurs. "Everything's gonna be okay." She presses a kiss to her forehead and straightens up to walk to a table at the side of the room. She brings back a syringe.

~~~

"Rachel," Ivy moans weakly. "Rachel, please!"

"You called for me, baby?" Rachel asks, coming down the stairs and into the basement.

"Need...need more blood." She's a mess of tears and sweat.

"It's such a strange addiction, isn't it?" Rachel asks casually, getting another syringe-full of blood ready. "It causes you so much pain and misery , but you crave it still." She walks to stand in front of the demon. "How badly, Ivy? How badly do you crave it?" Ivy drops her head with a small sob, and Rachel runs a hand over her hair before lifting her face. "I love you." Ivy knows she's not going to get the blood unless she says it back. She opens her mouth, and the words slip off her tongue. Rachel smiles and straddles Ivy's lap before sticking the needle into her neck.

~~~

A few weeks later, when Rachel comes down the stairs, it's not because Ivy called her--it's because she didn't, for a long time.

"Ivy? Are you doing alright?"

"Fine," Ivy says lazily with a wry smile, her body slumped forward. "Miserable. It's great." See, Ivy realized she had to fight this addiction. All it took was a small spark of clarity amidst the chaotic fog in her mind for the demon to gather the strength to fight.

"Oh, Ivy. I'm sorry. We don't have to do this for long. You know I can make you happy, if you just ask."

Ivy nods as vigorously as she can in this state. "Yes. Please. Rachel, I wanna be happy."

"Really?" she asks, stepping closer. "You're ready to be happy with me?"

"Yes. Yes, Rachel."

Rachel holds Ivy's face in both hands, holding it up to look into her eyes. "I'm not sure."

"I'm ready, Rachel. Please." Ivy nuzzles her wrist, sees her shiver.

"Wanna come upstairs with me?"

"Yes. Wanna be with you." She kisses her wrist, and the hands slip from her face. Her heart skips in relief as Rachel undoes her binds. She stands on shaky legs, and as Rachel leads her across the room and up the stairs, that old flame of anger reignites in Ivy's heart. She hasn't been weak like this since she was human, and NEVER wanted to experience it again. Ivy keeps her cool, reminding herself that there's nothing she can do right now. She has to get back her strength before she can put this bitch down.

~~~

A week into this weird game of House, Ivy gains Rachel's trust. The human leaves the demon unchained when she goes to bed. The first thing Ivy does is find Rachel's phone to call Emma.
"Ivy! Castiel told us Rachel tricked him and took you captive. He can't get back to her house or remember where it is because of some spell or something, which is also keeping Crowley from sensing your location. Can you get me the address?"

Ivy scrambles to grab an envelope off a stack of mail nearby, and reads off the address. "Hurry!" she whispers, before hanging up the phone, deleting the call, and going back to the couch to watch TV, the way Rachel left her. She hears her snoring, can smell her dream. It's a bad one. Rachel only seems to have bad dreams. Ivy wants to say the human deserves nightmares, deserves pain and fear. But she's never been able to bring herself to want true pain for her former partner. Maybe after the human blood is out of her system and the addiction gone, she'll be able to ignore these terrible feelings--after all, she was doing fairly well in doing just that, before the stupid girl nearly stabbed herself. Ivy wonders if Rachel would have gone through with it, or if she was just bluffing. Ivy let Rachel make her weak at that moment. She won't make that mistake again.

~~~

When she hears the cavalry arrive, Ivy leaps up from the couch, spins around--to face Rachel in her bedroom doorway. "Rachel. You're up."

"Yeah. I am."

"What's going on?" she asks, as Rachel slowly makes her way over to Ivy.

"Don't play with me, Ivy. I know you called them here. Now we have to leave." She reaches Ivy and grabs her arm. Ivy let's herself be pulled toward the back of the house, let's Rachel believe she's still too weak to fight back. Rachel opens the back door--to Crowley. He smiles coldly and waves with his fingers.

"Hello, there. Was in the neighborhood, thought I'd drop by. Smash your head in." He grabs her by the hair at the back of the head and slams it down onto the floor, before reaching out to Ivy, who jumps over Rachel's body to take his hands. "Are you hurt?" he asks, looking her over.

"Nothing that won't heal. We should go."

"We have to kill her first."

Ivy opens her mouth to protest, and Crowley gently takes her face in his hand.

"She is dangerous. She has started practicing magic. She needs to be stopped."

"We'll lock her up. Somewhere safe, where she can't hurt anyone."

"I am not going to risk your safety by keeping her alive. You are too precious to me. Do you know what happens if you die? Your soul will be purged and sent to Heaven. We'll never see eachother again."

"Crowley, I'm not going to die," she says gently, placing her hand over his on her face. "She's not going to kill me. Couldn't if she tried. We'll be on alert this time."

Crowley stares at her for a very long time, before turning away and cursing under his breath, tugging her away from the house. "You," he says to Castiel, who waits nearby with Emma and Garth, watching. "Help them get the witch to a secure lockup." Castiel, surprisingly, nods in agreement and obeys.

"Ivy, please come to the bunker," Emma says.

"No," booms the voice of the demon king.

"Cas won't bother you this time. He doesn't even have to be there if you don't want him to be."

Crowley's raging now. "If you think I'm letting ANY of you be alone with her until she's recovered, you are completely mad! I will kill WHOEVER crosses me, whoever tries to get to her until then! Understand?!"

"Crowley, what happened to being free to make my own decisions?" Ivy asks, and her king turns on her.

"You are completely free to make the decision to fight me, Ivy, but you will not win. What will it be? Fight, or get started on recovery so you can go see your family?"

Ivy knows he's right, so she nods once and follows him to the car. She let's him drive, staring out the window until the car comes to a stop at the edge of a forest. They sit in silence for awhile before Crowley reaches over and starts to take her hand, but stops himself, instead setting his hand palm-up--letting her decide to take it or not. She places her hand in his, and they both squeeze.

"I'm sorry," he says.

"I know." She strokes his hand with her thumb, aware that the action always soothes him. "I understand."

"You've always been very understanding. And very patient with me. I'm sure it's quite troublesome for you."

"It helps that you're cute," she says, smiling over at him.

He raises an indignant brow. "Just CUTE?"

"Smokin' hot," she amends, leaning toward him, and he steals a kiss.

"Correct," he says, opening the driver's door as she giggles at him. "Now let's switch. I hate driving."

"You really drove my car to her house?" Ivy asks as she gets out.

"I knew you'd want it right away."

They meet at the hood, and he winds his arms around her waist, as her hands wrap around his neck.

"I love you, ya know," she says, eliciting that bright grin of his she loves.

"And I love you."

They kiss for as long as they like beneath the stars, feeling safe and whole once again in eachother's presence.

~~~

Ivy unlocks the bunker's door and steps inside. "Guys...? If you try to trap me again, Crowley's gonna kill you, and I won't be able to stop him."

Emma rushes into the room to throw her arms around Ivy. "I'm glad you're here. I'm so sorry."

Ivy hugs her tightly. "I know. It's okay."

"I almost wanted to cure you, but I wouldn't have done it if you didn't want me to, I swear."

"I believe you."

Garth steps into the room, looking unsure. Ivy smiles at him, and he smiles back.

"Good to see ya again, buddy," Ivy tells him when her sister steps back.

"Always a bright day when our Ivy shines on us," is his response, and she bites back the silly laughter that wants to escape. But he can tell. "My charm works on a demon," he says, pulling her into a hug. "Sweet." Ivy rolls her eyes, rubbing his back. When they part, she looks around.

"Is Cas here?"

"No," Emma answers sadly.

"I said I didn't mind if he was here."

"He knows. He said he's not worth your forgiveness."

"Well...that's a complete 180°. And complete bull. Where is Cassy the emo angel?"

"I don't know, but I can summon him."

"Let's do that."

When Castiel appears, he looks very anxiously at Ivy.

"What the hell, Cas. You don't get to run from this, COWARD." She heads outside, beckoning him to follow, and he does. "Remember when we used to look at the stars together? We'd lie in the grass or the hood of the car. Sometimes we'd talk, and sometimes we'd just be silent. But it was always comfortable, because we were together." Castiel nods, staring up at the sky with sorrowful eyes. "You were my best friend, Cas, and you wouldn't accept me. That hurt somethin' awful, but I could've been an adult and moved on. It was the betrayal, with Rachel of all people, that really messed us up, Cas."

"I'm sorry, Ivy," he tells her, and the deep pain in his voice reaches her heart. "Truly sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing. I believed her when she said she wanted to make things right with you. I was a fool." His eyes close for a moment, before opening to show glistening tears. "Even if she had been truthful, I shouldn't have done what I did. I understand my betrayal. I am not worthy of your forgiveness."

"That's bullcrap, Cas," she says, taking his hand.

"My apology was sincere," he says with confusion, finally meeting her eyes.

"No, the part about you not being worthy. You are, Cas. You pulled me outta Hell, rebuilt my body and mended my soul. You saved Emma and me more times than I can count. And you were my best friend, when I really, REALLY needed one."

"...I...I would like to be friends again," he says, with big, hopeful eyes.

"I'd like that, too, Cas," she says with a small smile, and pulls him close. He returns her embrace, holding on tightly, and it feels like everytime before. "I forgive you, buddy." She feels him sag in relief, and she tightens her hold on him, supporting him like they've always done for eachother.

"You really are almost the same as you were as a human," he says quietly.

"Except I'm on your level of strength, now."

"I do not believe that."

"I could whoop your butt, angel."

"...It is good to have you back, Ivy."

~~~

Ivy leaves with Crowley at 5:45 a.m., having had a great night with Emma, Garth and Cas.

"Things are patched up with you and Bird Boy, then?" Crowley asks.

"Yeah. We're good."

"You always forgive him."

"Yeah, well, he always forgives me."

"The two of you are truly inseparable," he says with distaste.

"Yup. So you'd better get used to him, 'cause you're gonna start hanging out with us all eventually."

"I really don't think that's necessary."

"Well, tough luck."

"I'm not doing it."

"You are, and you'll like it."

After a considering silence, he asks, "When did you become the boss of me?" truly sounding like he wants to know.

"When we met."

"...Damn."

~~~

Ivy and Crowley stand before the door to Bobby's panic room, with Emma, Garth and Cas behind them.

"Do you know what you're gonna do?" Emma asks quietly. Ivy shakes her head.

"Do you want to go in there alone?" Crowley asks, and she nods. He brushes a hand down her hair, and steps away. Garth unlocks and opens the door, and closes it behind Ivy once she's stepped inside. Rachel sits in the corner, chained to the floor.

"Oh, Rachel," Ivy says in mock concern as she approaches, and the human's head jerks up, wide-eyed. Ivy slowly bends down on one knee, peering closely at her face. "I wanted them to at THE MOST give you a CHAIR."

"Please, Ivy," she says in a burst, desperation spewing out with her words. "Please don't hurt me. I'm sorry."

"HURT. I know you've been hurt. I know some pretty fucked up shit has been done to you." Memories of what that vampire did to Rachel years ago slide through her mind. "But you still don't understand TRUE PAIN. You don't understand constant agony, having your strength, energy, the basic ability to function, be slowly taken away from you." She moves a little closer, lowering her voice, and it's a twisted echo of the times they used to sit together and share secrets. "That happened to me TWICE."

"I'm so sorry," she whispers.

"How many times are you gonna say that before you realize I DON'T BELIEVE YOU."

"But it's true! There's something wrong with me."

"That's the most honest thing you've ever said to me." She stands tall, looking down on the pitiful girl with disgust. "They want to kill you. I want to get your brain fixed so you can sit in here, nice and sane, and think about your hideous life for as long as it lasts." Ivy relishes in the terror in Rachel's eyes, as she calls Cas.

"Yes, Ivy?" he asks, appearing beside her.

"Rachel is mentally ill. I need you to use your angel mojo to fix that."

Castiel touches two fingers to the human's forehead. She screams through the whole process. When it's done, the angel disappears. Rachel looks up at Ivy with bloodshot eyes.

"Goodbye, Rachel." Ivy leaves the girl weeping on the floor.

"I want her to stay here until further notice," Ivy proclaims, once she's shut the door to face her friends.

"Gotcha," says Emma, the only one who agrees with Ivy about keeping Rachel alive to suffer this way. "Think that'll be forever?"

"Don't know. Maybe. I only know what I want right now, and that's about thirty drinks. Who wants to hit the bar with me?"

Emma, Garth and Cas glance at Crowley, who rolls his eyes. Emma is the first to speak up.
"Okay, let's go."

"Guess I'm goin', too," says Garth.

"I'll see you when you return to the bunker," Castiel says, and disappears. Ivy sighs, and puts on a smile, leading everyone out of the house.

~~~

It only takes a couple months for Emma and Garth to get used to Crowley, and for everyone to start becoming friends. It takes another few for Castiel to come around, but Ivy is patient. About six months after their visit to the panic room, Ivy and Emma make another. Emma pats Ivy's shoulder, and the demon gives a small smile before entering the panic room and shutting the door.

"Hey, Rachel."

The human looks up at her with dull eyes. "Ivy," she says in a tired voice. "Hi."

"How're you feeling lately?"

"Depressed. Weak."

"Anything that make ya think of?"

"...You?"

Ivy waits.

"I locked you away, made you weak, hurt you. It was evil. I deserve this. I'll never forgive myself. I'm sorry."

"Ya know, Rachel. That's the first time I've believed you in a long time. I think you've learned from your mistakes." Ivy walks up to her, pulls a gun and a knife from their holsters, and offers them to her. "You can pick. Live the rest of your life in here, or die by your own hand. I'll even let you choose which weapon you use."

"...Why would you show me kindness like this?"

"Like I said. I think you've finally learned what you needed to. You're finally clear-headed. It's just what I want to do."

After a long moment of studying Ivy's face, Rachel takes the knife. Ivy re-holsters the gun.

"You really aren't like other demons."

"I've been told."

"Will you stay until I die?"

"I will." Ivy has a pretty strong sense of right and wrong, and she believes that, if she's going to let Rachel die, then it is only right for her to stay and watch the light leave her eyes.

"Will you keep your eyes blue?"

"Yes."

Rachel doesn't break their gaze the whole time--as she raises the knife, drives the blade through her stomach, struggles with bloody breath, and finally passes on. Ivy kneels on one knee, and closes Rachel's eyes. She's done looking at them. She takes the body to lay it on a beach, and returns to Emma to take her there. They light Rachel's body aflame and set it adrift on the water, to watch it burn into the night, before going back to the car.

"You okay?" Emma asks, as Ivy drives toward the bunker.

"I am. Rachel and I both moved on today."

At the bunker, the sisters are greeted by their friends, kissed by their guys, and given drinks outside by the grill on which Garth is making dinner. Music plays, a Classic Rock and Country playlist. Ivy realizes that she's happier than she's ever been. They all are. And what could be better than that? She's won. She's conquered her demons, and won her life.