Paw Prints on My Heart

“You guys did everything you could,” Zack said softly. He opened the door to the exam room for the couple as they left, tears in their eyes and arms around one another. Zack’s eyes were teary too, and he could feel his lip tremble as he reached out to rub the woman’s shoulder. “I’m really sorry.”

She left her husband’s arm for a moment and hugged Zack fiercely before they turned to leave.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for her,” she whispered before she let go.

Zack nodded, swallowing back tears. “We’ll bring her out to your car for you, ok?”

The couple went outside to pull their car around and Zack retreated into the back area of the clinic where Jack, another vet assistant, was cleaning up the treatment area.

“You ok?” Jack asked, winding up the cord to a pair of clippers before putting them away in a drawer. He glanced at Zack with concern as he moved on to spray the metal exam table.

Zack nodded quickly, swiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. “Can you wrap Annie up and bring her out to their car? I don’t think I can do it.”

“Of course,” Jack said, laying down his towel and disappearing back down the hallway to where Annie was.

Annie had been a long time patient of the vet clinic, and even though Zack had only been working there for a couple years he loved the little old beagle the most out of the whole staff. Despite her age she’d always been happy as could be when she came in, either to check her weight or for her yearly vaccinations. She’d been amazingly healthy all her life, and it had come as a shock to everyone when her routine bloodwork revealed kidney and pancreatic disease a little less than a month ago.

The doctors had done everything they could, from multiple rounds of fluid therapy to a special kidney-friendly diet, but the disease was progressive and wasn’t getting better. Eventually, her owners knew that she was suffering, and had made the hard decision to put her to sleep.

Zack had wanted to be there when they came in, and he had wanted to assist the doctor when they were ready to let her go. He loved Annie like she was his own dog, and he wanted to hold her for a moment for the last time.

But now, after everything was said and done he held back the tears and took a deep breath, then moved on with the doctor to the next patient. They were in the middle of afternoon appointment hours, and he didn’t have time to be sad.

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Later, when the last of the clients had left, Jack found him outside. He was sitting on the concrete just outside the break room door, leaning up against the building.

Jack quietly sat down next to him, and when he gently put his arm around Zack’s strong shoulders, the tears finally came.

Jack didn’t say anything, just let Zack cry, his arm steadying his shaking shoulders. For Zack it was enough just to have him there, watching out for him while he felt at his most vulnerable.

After a few minutes the tears slowed, and Zack took a deep breath, wiping at his nose with the sleeve of his scrubs.

“It’s always the ones you love the most,” Jack finally said, hugging Zack closer to him. When Zack looked over he saw Jack’s eyes were wet too. Jack half-heartedly laughed. “Meanwhile, the ones who would sooner bite your face off when you just look at them manage to live forever.”

Zack smiled despite himself and leaned into Jack, laying his head on his shoulder. “Thanks, Jack.”

A moment passed before Jack surprised him by kissing the top of his head. “I’m sorry.”

Zack sat up from Jack’s shoulder, and when he met Jack’s eyes they were kind and loving. “I don’t really want to be alone tonight,” Zack said softly.

“We can go see a movie? One without any dogs that might not have a happy ending?”
“That sounds good.”

Jack gazed at him for a moment longer, before leaning in and quickly kissing Zack’s cheek. “For now, back to work.”

When Jack stood up and went back inside, Zack’s cheeks were crimson red, and not just from the crying.