I Didn't Want to Let You Go

Zacky POV

Becky had been taken into foster care 3 years ago.

There was a letter waiting for me when I got home from tour. The house was quiet, my wife had left me just before I went on tour, she took Jade and Johnny with her. Ingrid and Rick kicked about at home with the girls checking on them.

The letter had the classic seal from the local authorities, it may have been my update on Becky but it wasn't due for another month. As I opened it I felt dread, when the social worker updated me it was an informal letter but this was official, stamped and signed by a service manager. As I read it I felt my heart beat faster, I hadn't seen Becky in three years, we had no contact and it wasn't going to change but why would they think I would want her adopted? They couldn't adopt her, I was her dad.

I rummaged through the drawers looking for the paperwork, I was sure they couldn't do this. I had complied with all their wishes, I had signed over my rights, surely they couldn't adopt her out. It didn't even say who was applying to adopt her, it could be total strangers. I was told she was settled in her foster home, why would they want to adopt her out to total strangers if she was settled.

Becky's POV

I was given the news this morning when my social worker Sid came round. They wanted me, they wanted me permanently. I had been with Brayden and Kelly for three years and they want to adopt me. They told me it was my decision and nothing would change, I'm always apart of there family, but they want to make it official, have their surnames on all of my paperwork, they wanted to be my parents. I already called them my parents, when I introduced them to my friends I called them my parents, this would just make it official.

I never got back in contact with my family, I didn't want to. I remember my Dads words about how I had disrupted their lives and tore the family apart, I would rather stay away and let them live happily. Braeden and Kelly want me, I don't ruin their lives and I make them happy and they make me happy, there's no shouting, no drinking, no late nights. In this house, everything makes sense. After what Ryan did nothing made sense with Dad.

Zacky POV

The social worker arranged a meeting for two days later, I went alone. The social worker seemed sympathetic, but he agreed with the decision. They explained that I had made no attempt to sort anything at home, that I made no attempt to repair my relationship with my daughter and that I made no attempt to comply with the plan for reunification. How could I do that if I wasn't allowed any contact with my daughter? I only knew what social services had told me and they are known to stretch the truth, they had said in court Becky was just troubled, no mention of the fact she threw a glass at my wife. she could be violent still and you hear about the abused becoming the abuser, I had other kids. Why didn't they understand? It didn't mean I wanted her adopted, I was her father, they were just sorting her out. If I had known they would do this I would of never gave her up.

Apparently social services team didn't like what I had to say, even though they said I made the right choice putting Becky into foster care, they are saying it's my fault she isn't home right now and she was being adopted. What can I do? I can appeal again and again against the decision but it was unlikely to change. I would get Becky back if it stopped her being adopted, but it was unlikely to happen, the bond was broken and social services weren't willing to chance a placement breakdown and Becky was settled and loved her new home, her new family, she didn't want to come back to us. They said I had an unstable relationship and my job would make it difficult to care for Becky.