I'm Not Letting Go
LA Sunshine
I could see him coming towards me. His hair solid black but his eyes still piercing blue.
Please Don't hug me. For godsakes please just walk past me and ignore. Don't recognize me. Goddamnit. Too late here he comes. What do I do. I Can't wince in pain.
"Angie! Holy shit, Hey! How are you? I didn't know you lived here." He said looking down at my hands shoving his in his deep leather pockets.
"Yeah, yeah. I do. I moved here after high school to persue my fashion line. What are you doing out here. It's a long ways from Michigan. How've you been?"
"Great actually. I'm out here recording for a while. I'm in a band now. Well not that that's new, but it's a new band. You look nice. Is that your design or someone elses?"
"Mine. I always make a sample for me to try to make sure the fabrics not too heavy or anything." I whispered as he brushed hair from my face.
"Listen, heres my number. Text or call me sometime. Maybe we can grab dinner or something, catch up." he said handing me a slip of paper smiling as he went back to walking towards his destination.
It'd been years since I'd seen him. Years since I was even myself. I moved out here straight out of high school and that's when I met Tyler. I thought moving here would be the best adventures of my life, but the secret behind closed door is it really isn't. After being here and with Tyler for a year I moved into his place in downtown LA. I loved the city, I loved the lights, and at the time I thought I loved Tyler. As the days went on he went from some who said he loved me and gave me the world to a slap across the face here or a kick to the ribs there or another senseless threat because I didn't do something the exact way he wanted me to. I was to scared to stay but too scared to go at the same time. In the middle of a hot LA summer I'm wearing a long sleeves to his the bruises on my arms. I hadn't seen the sand or the ocean in years. I missed the feeling of the waves crashing against my feet, the sun kissing my skin.
I mainly missed the friends I'd grown to love when I moved here. They were my only sense of security and safety until Tyler took them away. I continued walking my way back to Tylers house to make sure I got there just in time to start dinner. I could see his car parked in the driveway. Either he's pissed that I'm late or he's early to surprise me with an "I'm sorry about this morning baby I love you gift"
I opened the front door, he was sitting on the couch with his friends and a large gift bag in front of him.
"Angie! Babe! How was your day. You look great babe" he said wrapping his arms as tight as he could around my bruised waist.
"It was great. How was your day baby? Are your friends staying for dinner. I've got to go get it started."
"Yeah, they'll be sticking around. I got you a gift. I'll bring it to you in just a second." he said walking back to his friends as I walked to the kitchen to start the chicken.
I wanted to scream and cry. I knew my ribs had been broken for weeks since one of his last attacks but the harder he squeezed me everyday the more I could feel them shatter.
"Where were you today? I didn't say you could go out." Tyler said sternly grabbing my arm.
"I'm sorry I --"
"No, you know better. Just wait until everyone leaves tonight Angie." He said releasing his grip from my arm.
"Yes sir." I whispered. "I really should start dinner..."
Tyler walked away and I stared out the window. How did I become so weak? So controlled? I can't remember the last time I spoke for myself, defended my self or anything that came to doing it for me. I looked at the bedroom across the kitchen and back to the living room Tyler was four drinks in, a few more and I wouldn't be able to handle what he was gonna dish out tonight. I made my escaped plan. I started to prep the chicken and potatoes for dinner and went in the living room.
"Tyler, do you have anything you need me to throw in the laundry? I wanted to get my outfit for your company dinner cleaned and ironed before tomorrow." I said softly looking in his direction.
"Actually yeah. Anything in the hamper can go ahead and be washed." I nodded and walked in the bedroom. I threw as much of my clothes in a duffel bag as I could. I grabbed my cell phone charger my wallet and anything else I still had of me and zipped it closed. I glanced on last time at the living room, he had two more beers down. I grabbed the bag and headed back towards the kitchen. I opened the back door and without another glance back or another thought I ran. I ran as fast as I could, as far as I could until I felt somewhat safe. I grabbed my phone from the pocked of my jeans "25 missed calls : Tyler Barnes" I shuttered at the thought looking around to find the closest place indoors. I saw a coffee shop I'd never hear of, and it was on a corner. I dialed the first number that came to mind.
"Hello?"
Please Don't hug me. For godsakes please just walk past me and ignore. Don't recognize me. Goddamnit. Too late here he comes. What do I do. I Can't wince in pain.
"Angie! Holy shit, Hey! How are you? I didn't know you lived here." He said looking down at my hands shoving his in his deep leather pockets.
"Yeah, yeah. I do. I moved here after high school to persue my fashion line. What are you doing out here. It's a long ways from Michigan. How've you been?"
"Great actually. I'm out here recording for a while. I'm in a band now. Well not that that's new, but it's a new band. You look nice. Is that your design or someone elses?"
"Mine. I always make a sample for me to try to make sure the fabrics not too heavy or anything." I whispered as he brushed hair from my face.
"Listen, heres my number. Text or call me sometime. Maybe we can grab dinner or something, catch up." he said handing me a slip of paper smiling as he went back to walking towards his destination.
It'd been years since I'd seen him. Years since I was even myself. I moved out here straight out of high school and that's when I met Tyler. I thought moving here would be the best adventures of my life, but the secret behind closed door is it really isn't. After being here and with Tyler for a year I moved into his place in downtown LA. I loved the city, I loved the lights, and at the time I thought I loved Tyler. As the days went on he went from some who said he loved me and gave me the world to a slap across the face here or a kick to the ribs there or another senseless threat because I didn't do something the exact way he wanted me to. I was to scared to stay but too scared to go at the same time. In the middle of a hot LA summer I'm wearing a long sleeves to his the bruises on my arms. I hadn't seen the sand or the ocean in years. I missed the feeling of the waves crashing against my feet, the sun kissing my skin.
I mainly missed the friends I'd grown to love when I moved here. They were my only sense of security and safety until Tyler took them away. I continued walking my way back to Tylers house to make sure I got there just in time to start dinner. I could see his car parked in the driveway. Either he's pissed that I'm late or he's early to surprise me with an "I'm sorry about this morning baby I love you gift"
I opened the front door, he was sitting on the couch with his friends and a large gift bag in front of him.
"Angie! Babe! How was your day. You look great babe" he said wrapping his arms as tight as he could around my bruised waist.
"It was great. How was your day baby? Are your friends staying for dinner. I've got to go get it started."
"Yeah, they'll be sticking around. I got you a gift. I'll bring it to you in just a second." he said walking back to his friends as I walked to the kitchen to start the chicken.
I wanted to scream and cry. I knew my ribs had been broken for weeks since one of his last attacks but the harder he squeezed me everyday the more I could feel them shatter.
"Where were you today? I didn't say you could go out." Tyler said sternly grabbing my arm.
"I'm sorry I --"
"No, you know better. Just wait until everyone leaves tonight Angie." He said releasing his grip from my arm.
"Yes sir." I whispered. "I really should start dinner..."
Tyler walked away and I stared out the window. How did I become so weak? So controlled? I can't remember the last time I spoke for myself, defended my self or anything that came to doing it for me. I looked at the bedroom across the kitchen and back to the living room Tyler was four drinks in, a few more and I wouldn't be able to handle what he was gonna dish out tonight. I made my escaped plan. I started to prep the chicken and potatoes for dinner and went in the living room.
"Tyler, do you have anything you need me to throw in the laundry? I wanted to get my outfit for your company dinner cleaned and ironed before tomorrow." I said softly looking in his direction.
"Actually yeah. Anything in the hamper can go ahead and be washed." I nodded and walked in the bedroom. I threw as much of my clothes in a duffel bag as I could. I grabbed my cell phone charger my wallet and anything else I still had of me and zipped it closed. I glanced on last time at the living room, he had two more beers down. I grabbed the bag and headed back towards the kitchen. I opened the back door and without another glance back or another thought I ran. I ran as fast as I could, as far as I could until I felt somewhat safe. I grabbed my phone from the pocked of my jeans "25 missed calls : Tyler Barnes" I shuttered at the thought looking around to find the closest place indoors. I saw a coffee shop I'd never hear of, and it was on a corner. I dialed the first number that came to mind.
"Hello?"