Seems Like We Lost It All

The first thing Madison noticed the next morning was the awful throbbing pain in her head. The second thing was Brian’s scent all around her. Braving the sunlight, she cracked open her eyes just enough to look around. Why the hell was she in Brian's bed? What the fuck happened last night?

She didn’t have long to wonder before Brian walked in, closing the door behind him. He held out a glass of water and a bottle of pain medicine. “Thought you might need these,” he said quietly.

“We didn’t...umm.”

“No way, unconscious isn’t my type.”

“Okay, good. Now give me those, my head fucking hurts.” She took the items from Brian and quickly swallowed two of the pills.

“That’s usually what happens when you attempt to drink a whole bar’s worth of alcohol.”

“Shut up, your voice is making my headache worse.”

Chuckling, Brian headed back for the door. “We are going to talk about what happened later. But for now, sleep it off.”

She waited until he was gone before wiggling out of the jeans she’d been wearing the day before. That allowed her to get much more comfortable and she snuggled back into the blankets and was asleep within minutes.

------------

Hours later, when she woke up again, the bus was still moving, but it was dark outside the window. Snores of different volumes filled the room, coming from the guys. It had to be late for all of them to be in bed already.

She quietly slipped out from under the blankets and went to her bag, grabbing some pajamas before heading to the bathroom. The first thing she wanted was a long, hot shower then she wanted food. Her stomach was already making awful growling noises.

Once every inch of her skin was scrubbed and her hair was sufficiently washed and rinsed, she stepped out of the shower. She dressed quickly, leaving her hair wrapped in a towel as she headed for the small kitchen area in the bus.

Brian was stretched out on the couch, holding his phone up to his ear as he spoke quietly to someone. Madison did her best to ignore him as she rummaged through the refrigerator. There wasn’t much to choose from, so she finally settled on some leftover pizza. She tossed it onto a plate and placed it in the small microwave.

Brian was just finishing up his call when she took her plate to the table to sit down. “My brother is going to propose to his girlfriend tomorrow. He called me freaking the hell out about it.” He sank down into the seat across from her and she forced a small smile. She tried to ignore the surge of relief she felt upon hearing that it was his brother he was talking to so late and not a woman.

“That’s great. Tell him congratulations from me.”

“What happened to you last night, Madison?”

Madison sighed, pushing her plate of food away from her, suddenly not hungry anymore. “It just wasn’t a good night.”

“That’s not good enough. What made you disappear and get so drunk you passed out in an unknown place?”

“You’re not going to leave me alone until I tell you, are you?”

“Nope.”

“The fact that it all even happened is insane. But I ran into Andrea, the woman that Alex was having the affair with. She had no idea what happened to him, she thought he’d just left her without saying anything. It fucked with her head, so she left California and went away to stay with her mom for a while. Which just so happened to be the same city you guys played in last night.”

“Fuck, that’s a lot for you to deal with. Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not. I’m tiring of reliving this shit over and over. Every time I think I’m finally going to be alright, something comes up. It’s like I get dragged back to square one all over again. Maybe I’m just going to be fucked up for the rest of my life.”

“That’s not true, it hasn’t even been a year yet. You’re not just going to be okay overnight.”

“I had to tell Andrea that Alex was dead. She had no idea he had a wife. She thought she was the only one and she thought he loved her. He had been with her the night he died. He was on the way back from her house when the wreck happened.”

“How did she take the news?”

“Honestly? She seemed relieved. I told her to never think of him again. I told her to forget about him and move on. Why can’t I take my own advice?”

At the sight of the first tear rolling down her cheek, Brian moved around the table and slid into the seat next to her. He wrapped an arm around her and she leaned against him, letting her head rest on his shoulder.

“You’ve just got to take it one day at a time. Every single person on this bus cares about you a lot. You can talk to any of us. At anytime. But you’ve got to stop running away like you do. When it gets too overwhelming come find me. Or Matt or any of us. None of us want to see you hurting anymore, let us help you.”

“Thank you for finding me and taking care of me last night.”

“You can thank me by promising not to disappear again.”

“Okay, I promise.”

“Good. Well now that you’ve decided to get up and let me have my bed back, I need sleep.” He gave her one last squeeze before sliding out of the seat and heading for his bunk.