Dear God, I Left Her When I Found Her

Wow, I never thought she would be so exceptive of me. She didn't give the stink eye or say something that would be a definite stay-out-of-my-life sign. She was pretty calm and mellow about the whole thing.

So there we were, in my car on our way to the beach. Her crazy friend, Tanya, in the back seat watching my every move while Michelle was in the front seat with me.

"Have you guys ever heard of my band?" I asked, finally working up enough guts to say something. I thought it was hard talking to girls when I was a teen, but now, trying to talk to my own daughter really made things a brain freeze.

"Yeah," Michelle nodded, unconcerned and gazed out the window.

"What Michelle means is," Tanya said from the back seat and leaned her elbows against the two front seats. "That we know all about Avenged Sevenfold and your gorgeous guitarist."

I managed to turn in my seat to look at Tanya, startled. I can't believe she would have one of those crushes on me.

"Not you!" Michelle and Tanya screeched in unison, outraged.

"Oh," I said relieved. "Got scared there for a second." I blew out a breath.

"Psh." Tanya exclaimed with an added hand gesture. "Why on God's green Earth would I like you?"

I sent an evil glare to Tanya through the rear-view mirror.

"Not that you're not good looking or anything." Tanya explained and rolled her eyes. "Its just that I'm not into guys that play guitar with their bum-bums."

They watched that?! I reached back behind me and started to try to hit her blindly. Tanya squealed and yelled while she was laughing. After the riot settled I decided to defend myself.

"Want me to tell you some of the stuff Zacky's said while he was drunk?" I asked Tanya.

Michelle turned to me, shaking her head frantically. "No!" she mouthed.

"Sure!" Tanya squealed again, excited.

"Nevermind." I laughed. "Zacky'd kill me."

Tanya stuck her tongue out at me and crossed her arms. Right about that time my cell phone rang.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hey, babe, you get her yet?" Michelle, my girlfriend asked.

"Yeah. We're on our way to the beach." I answered.

"Okay, then. The guys are going up there for some sun. I just hope Jimmy doesn’t get too burnt this time."

I laughed at the memory. Jimmy looked like a tall, clawless lobster.

"I'll get a ride with Matt and Val." She told me.

"See you there, babe."

"Bye."

I hung up the phone and put in back in my pocket.

"The guys from the band and their girlfriends are on their way to the beach." I announced.

"Really?!" exclaimed Tanya. "I get to meet Zacky drop-dead-sexy Vengeance?"

"Yeah," I answered a little uneasy. "And his girlfriend."

"So?" Tanya said, shrugging. "She's a lucky bitch. I can still stare. That's not illegal now, is it?"

Michelle started laughing and shook her head. "Its never stopped her before. She only likes older guys anyway. She totally ignores guys in our classes that have huge crushes on her."

"Whatever." Tanya said, dismissing Michelle's words. "Guys our age are really four years younger. So according to my calculations… Zacky could be my sugar daddy." We all began to laugh. Mainly because I could so picture Zacky dressed like a pimp. "And I don’t need a guy that’s overly clingly." Tanya finished.

"Nathan isn't clingly." Michelle said under her breathe. Tanya heard it anyway and scowled, but I still noticed the tinged red on her tan cheeks.

"Its against code to date a bandmate, isn't it, Mr. Gates?" Tanya asked me.

I shrugged. "Considering all of my bandmates are guys…-"

"Never mind." Tanya cut me off.