Our Life Is Just a TV Show

“Hey, you okay?” Jeni sat next to me on my bed.

I closed my laptop and rubbed my temples. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Bill will be back soon,” she assured me.

“I know,” I got off my bed and walked into our kitchen. Our apartment was this amazing loft, everything was modern and retro.

I opened the pantry. Ugh nothing was in there.

“Sorry, hun, I didn’t get a chance to go to Chelsea today. I was practicing at the studio,” Jeni explained.

Ugh that’s right. She was going to have a part in Les Miserables on Broadway soon, and if she worked hard enough she might even catch the part of Eponine. I mean she did fit the part perfectly, she was a tomboy.

“What’s it like to be in a real relationship?” Jeni asked me as I sat down at the island.

Poor Jeni. She didn’t trust guys much, naturally. She’d been raped when she was ten and it was hard for her to let any guy in.

“You just need to find that right guy. Sadly I don’t think one will be on Broadway,” I laughed. “Or Juilliard for that matter.”

“You’re right,” she sighed and sat down next to me with a cup of tea in her hands.

“I think you and Gustav would be quite cute together,” I mumbled. “But of course I’m not dissing Bea or anything. They love each other….”

“What if I was gay?” Jeni spurted out.

“What?” I gasped.

“I mean face it I’m attracted to guys but I can trust none of them. I don’t know I think I should be gay,” Jeni looked not too sure of herself.

“Jeni are you attracted to girls at all?”

“No…not at all,” she sighed.

“Well I didn’t think so. Don’t worry Jen we’ll find you someone. I promise.”

We sat there quietly for a moment and then my cell started to ring, breaking the awkward silence. I mean personally I wouldn’t care if Jeni was gay. I worked with a gay guy. And in the field she worked in most everyone was.

I knew she wasn’t. She was much too attracted to guys. I had heard her talking about Georg one day when Bea had been over.

That would be nice, all three of us with boyfriends in the band. Poor Tom, he’d be alone. Maybe if he would just change it would be good, things would be better for him.

It was Bill calling.

“Hey baby,” I answered. “Miss me already?”

“I missed you as soon as I got on the plane,” Bill sounded tired.

“The plane ride almost over?” I asked.

“Nah, there’s a lot of turbulence. I haven’t been able to get any sleep,” he explained.

“Try and get some, kay? Don’t get tired out on tour or your throat is gonna get messed up again.”

“Yes mommy,” he said. I could almost see him smiling.

“So the turbulence is really bad?”

“Yeah, it was so bad about an hour ago that the oxygen masks came on. I was so afraid Tara, you should have seen my crying like a baby. Gussi calmed me down.”

“Don’t call me that!” I heard Gustav yell sounding half-asleep.

“Agh he just hit me with a pillow!” Bill laughed. “And we just woke up about ten people around us. I’m gonna go before something else happens.”

“Okay, I love you,” I said.

“I love you more,” he whispered.

“Must we start this again Bill?” Bill and I had a thing where we said we loved it each other back and forth. One time it lasted almost an hour.

“No, I promise I won’t take an hour this time.”

“I love you Bill,” I whispered.

“I wuv you Tara,” he replied.

“Goodnight.”

“Hold my pillow and pretend I’m there!” he demanded.

“Bill just say goodbye already!” Tom sounded quite aggravated.

“Sorry babe I just woke up Tom from his beauty sleep. I better not disturb him. You don’t wanna see what he looks like without,” Bill giggled.

“Ok Bill, go. I love you. Bye.”

“I love you too. Bye-bye.”

I closed my cell and took out my Bill pillow, hugging it close to my chest.

“I love you Bill,” I whispered, wanting him to really be there holding me.