Status: 1/1
Reassemble It
the only exception.
Love never lasts and she’d known that all along.
It would pass. Like the seasons, like April rain showers, like a sea breeze, like a thunderstorm. And it would hurt, like skinning her knees on gravel, picking out the dirt from the wound. But that would also pass. So perhaps that was the silver lining.
Nothing ever lasts, and love is no exception. There was no only exception.
Posting the statement was like... relief. After all, it had been a long time coming. Forgiveness wasn’t something Hayley found herself willing to give. Not romantically. They had been over for a while now. Several weeks. They just hadn’t been admitting it. Tour One was the distraction, the space needed, the happiness and excitement Hayley had craved. It was healing, and eye-opening, and the start of a new chapter. A new album cycle, a new band line-up, a new era in their friendships, a new bunch of tours to plan... and, perhaps, finally, a new relationship status. Single.
Single wasn’t so bad. Divorcee, on the other hand, didn’t sound so great. Hayley hadn’t pictured herself becoming someone’s wife, but then she had. She also hadn’t pictured herself becoming someone’s ex-wife, either, but here they were.
Wallowing in the misery of it wasn’t Hayley’s style any more, but she felt entitled to mope around at least a little. She was separating from the man she’d loved and grown with for a decade. That was going to need some grieving time. A process. She’d already been through the denial of the idea that the relationship may be falling apart, and the anger over the fact that it mostly came down to Chad’s behaviour. They were both to blame, she knew that, but Chad had been a terrible, sour catalyst. They had done their bargaining, trying to make it work... but it wouldn’t. Hayley felt as if she was, in part, both suffering the depression and acceptance stages at the same time. She had long ago accepted that this was it, but putting it out there in the world was a different kind of acceptance.
So, she was wallowing. A cliche sort of walling in her hotel room -- she’d eaten ice-cream and watched a lot of Friends. She was still watching a lot of Friends and opted to stay that way for the rest of the night. She’d probably have ice-cream for dinner too, because she was a goddamn adult and could do what she liked. Good thing they didn’t have a show tonight. Realistically, playing a show probably would’ve made her feel better, but she didn’t want to face the possibility of seeing the pity in people’s eyes. Not tonight. Tomorrow, she’d be strong. But not tonight.
It was around seven when she heard three soft taps on her door, and immediately knew who it was before she even answered.
“I brought Chinese food,” Taylor smiled, gentle and warm and not in the slightest bit pitying, just like his eyes. “Dinner for two?”
They had a picnic dinner. Hayley spread the duvet out on the floor and they sat down, eating rice and noodles and chicken from plastic forks, and watched half of season three of Friends before finally speaking again.
“I know you. And I know you don’t wanna talk about it right now. That’s okay. I’m not here to talk about it. I’m just... here.”
T could be a man of few words but when things came down to it... he knew what to say.
Later, they migrated to the bed. The empty containers were in the trash and they’d reached season five... and Hayley had ice-cream. With her head on Taylor’s chest, she had a feeling she would fall asleep here. He would too. It wouldn’t be the first time.
“T?” she spoke up.
It was a moment before he answered. “Yeah?”
“I love you.”
Quiet again. Quiet contemplation. “I love you too, H.”
Two more episodes and Taylor was asleep. Hayley couldn’t see his face but his breathing was low and even, quiet snores following, and his arms around her felt limp.
Hayley, on the other hand, was more awake than she thought she’d be. Awake, thinking, wondering... maybe she did have it wrong. Wrong in a different way than she’d originally thought.
Maybe love could last.
She felt Taylor’s hand twitch against her waist, and she smiled.
Maybe the only exception to her rule had been someplace else all along.
It would pass. Like the seasons, like April rain showers, like a sea breeze, like a thunderstorm. And it would hurt, like skinning her knees on gravel, picking out the dirt from the wound. But that would also pass. So perhaps that was the silver lining.
Nothing ever lasts, and love is no exception. There was no only exception.
Posting the statement was like... relief. After all, it had been a long time coming. Forgiveness wasn’t something Hayley found herself willing to give. Not romantically. They had been over for a while now. Several weeks. They just hadn’t been admitting it. Tour One was the distraction, the space needed, the happiness and excitement Hayley had craved. It was healing, and eye-opening, and the start of a new chapter. A new album cycle, a new band line-up, a new era in their friendships, a new bunch of tours to plan... and, perhaps, finally, a new relationship status. Single.
Single wasn’t so bad. Divorcee, on the other hand, didn’t sound so great. Hayley hadn’t pictured herself becoming someone’s wife, but then she had. She also hadn’t pictured herself becoming someone’s ex-wife, either, but here they were.
Wallowing in the misery of it wasn’t Hayley’s style any more, but she felt entitled to mope around at least a little. She was separating from the man she’d loved and grown with for a decade. That was going to need some grieving time. A process. She’d already been through the denial of the idea that the relationship may be falling apart, and the anger over the fact that it mostly came down to Chad’s behaviour. They were both to blame, she knew that, but Chad had been a terrible, sour catalyst. They had done their bargaining, trying to make it work... but it wouldn’t. Hayley felt as if she was, in part, both suffering the depression and acceptance stages at the same time. She had long ago accepted that this was it, but putting it out there in the world was a different kind of acceptance.
So, she was wallowing. A cliche sort of walling in her hotel room -- she’d eaten ice-cream and watched a lot of Friends. She was still watching a lot of Friends and opted to stay that way for the rest of the night. She’d probably have ice-cream for dinner too, because she was a goddamn adult and could do what she liked. Good thing they didn’t have a show tonight. Realistically, playing a show probably would’ve made her feel better, but she didn’t want to face the possibility of seeing the pity in people’s eyes. Not tonight. Tomorrow, she’d be strong. But not tonight.
It was around seven when she heard three soft taps on her door, and immediately knew who it was before she even answered.
“I brought Chinese food,” Taylor smiled, gentle and warm and not in the slightest bit pitying, just like his eyes. “Dinner for two?”
They had a picnic dinner. Hayley spread the duvet out on the floor and they sat down, eating rice and noodles and chicken from plastic forks, and watched half of season three of Friends before finally speaking again.
“I know you. And I know you don’t wanna talk about it right now. That’s okay. I’m not here to talk about it. I’m just... here.”
T could be a man of few words but when things came down to it... he knew what to say.
Later, they migrated to the bed. The empty containers were in the trash and they’d reached season five... and Hayley had ice-cream. With her head on Taylor’s chest, she had a feeling she would fall asleep here. He would too. It wouldn’t be the first time.
“T?” she spoke up.
It was a moment before he answered. “Yeah?”
“I love you.”
Quiet again. Quiet contemplation. “I love you too, H.”
Two more episodes and Taylor was asleep. Hayley couldn’t see his face but his breathing was low and even, quiet snores following, and his arms around her felt limp.
Hayley, on the other hand, was more awake than she thought she’d be. Awake, thinking, wondering... maybe she did have it wrong. Wrong in a different way than she’d originally thought.
Maybe love could last.
She felt Taylor’s hand twitch against her waist, and she smiled.
Maybe the only exception to her rule had been someplace else all along.
♠ ♠ ♠
I'm sure people are aware but Hayley Williams and Chad Gilbert announced their separation today... I have a lot of feelings about it, particularly that Chad is nasty and I'm so glad Hayley is finally putting herself first, but I'll leave that out of this space. You can message my Tumblr to talk about it if you want to though.I also just wanna say that this fic is not necessarily romantic!Tayley... I'm also not a Tayley shipper waiting for them to get together now that Hayley and Chad have broken up (for the record, I think they'd make a sweet couple, but I'm not holding my breath about it, and I'm definitely not celebrating the divorce for that reason). This idea just kinda popped into my head after I saw someone make an edit featuring the lyrics from The Only Exception and this is what formed from it. Just something soft and sweet... I found it cleansing because as glad as I am that Hayley is starting this album cycle with a fresh beginning in her personal life too, I am so sad for her. This is a very sad day and this fic isn't meant to disrespect that. I just thought I might post it in case some others find it cleansing too? I don't know. Let me know if you enjoyed it!