I Miss You
Day Twenty-Four
Day 2 of the family program:
Good evening, dear,
Good evening, dear,
Waking up felt hard this morning. I wanted to keep sleeping, but I know I needed to drive for the program today. I stopped at Sheetz on the way down and bought three packs of cigarettes; the woman didn't give me the 100s though.
I entertained myself in the car by singing. I got down there at 8:37 and went in. One of the women who was there for her son told me she was proud of me. After she stepped out of the room, grump, age-difference lady tried to give me motherly advice that just pissed me off. She's basing us on her 30+ year marriage that from my understanding has never had the husband sober. She keep glaring at me; I may be the youngest person in there, but her acting like that makes me uncomfortable.
We had our first joint session today which made me really nervous. I know the counselor mostly just talked to you, but I also learned something that I had no idea about and it horrified a part of me. I never realized you had made that plan the night of your last arrest and it made me realize that there has to be something higher out there that brought you to me, when I needed someone to take me out of my previous situation, and what told me to text you the night after your arrest when we were no longer together.
It's a miracle to me.
Also, the fact that the counselor made me admit to wanting to spend the rest of my life with you still makes my face burn.
The drive home wasn't bad; I made a last minute decision to go buy jeans that I've been desperately needing. Spent a little more than I would have liked to, but all my jeans have holes where they absolutely don't need them.
Since getting back to the house, I've done my "homework" and that's been it.
Oh well, I need to get to bed. Goodnight. I love you. I'll see you in the morning.
I entertained myself in the car by singing. I got down there at 8:37 and went in. One of the women who was there for her son told me she was proud of me. After she stepped out of the room, grump, age-difference lady tried to give me motherly advice that just pissed me off. She's basing us on her 30+ year marriage that from my understanding has never had the husband sober. She keep glaring at me; I may be the youngest person in there, but her acting like that makes me uncomfortable.
We had our first joint session today which made me really nervous. I know the counselor mostly just talked to you, but I also learned something that I had no idea about and it horrified a part of me. I never realized you had made that plan the night of your last arrest and it made me realize that there has to be something higher out there that brought you to me, when I needed someone to take me out of my previous situation, and what told me to text you the night after your arrest when we were no longer together.
It's a miracle to me.
Also, the fact that the counselor made me admit to wanting to spend the rest of my life with you still makes my face burn.
The drive home wasn't bad; I made a last minute decision to go buy jeans that I've been desperately needing. Spent a little more than I would have liked to, but all my jeans have holes where they absolutely don't need them.
Since getting back to the house, I've done my "homework" and that's been it.
Oh well, I need to get to bed. Goodnight. I love you. I'll see you in the morning.
♠ ♠ ♠
Me and that woman did not get along at all. I was a little furious with her at this point and I did inform the counselor of what she was doing during one of the joint sessions. I wasn't the only one that was uncomfortable in that situation though.Also, the plan of his night of arrest wasn't something that I'd like to speak about. He was at a point so low after leaving me for his previous girlfriend that he just wanted to disappear. That's why I'm shocked that these events played out the way they did.