I Will Make You Believe....

We had both been sitting on my bed for the better part of an hour just staring at anything but each other. I was lost on what words to use to tell Josh what is probably the biggest piece of me. He needed to hear it at this point though.

"I miss you..." I looked over at Josh, who was staring at me.

"I miss you too... I'm sorry..."

"No, I should've said something to you before you got on the plane... or the last week..." I shook my head.

"I think it's time I told you that story I never told you on the balcony that first night..." I stood and motioned him to follow me.

We walked down stairs and Trina was nowhere to be found. I assumed she had left to give us some privacy. I had him follow me down into the basement. We had our instruments and game room down here. We also had our storage closet.

I motioned Josh to sit down on the couch while I turned to the storage closet. The small box, containing what I wanted to show him, sat in the back covered in dust. I hadn't looked through it in nearly two years. I brought the box over and sat on the coffee table with him in front of me and the box on my lap.

"I was one of four kids," I told him as I opened the box, sifting through the contents for the picture I was needing," Elenor, Zack, Devin, and me." I showed him the picture of me and my siblings on Devin's 18th birthday.

"My dad passed when I was still in my mom's tummy. He had some kind of medical issue. My mom hated going into it." I chuckled at the memory of her avoiding the topic. No matter how sad it was she always cracked a joke to change the subject.

"This is my mom, Abigail," I handed him another picture of my mom and my dad from several decades ago before I continued digging," She had Devin when she was 15. She was raped and refused to give up the child. She actually met my dad when he helped her after one of the kids at school called her names and threw her books on the ground after she started showing." I smiled at the story.

"I was the youngest. Devin being a decade older than me, Elenor three years older than me, and Zack just one year older than me. We were actually on the way to Zack's graduation. Elenor had come home from college, Devin from Pennsylvania, and mom was driving us from the house. I was telling them about a tour I had that summer with one of the local bands I had been working with for a few years. Devin would scoff every time I brought up touring, but mom loved it. She loved hearing us talk about what we wanted to do in life. Devin had a full scholarship to USC for football and was working on a masters, Elenor was at New Mexico studying rockets, and Zack was going to Berkley for music. We all were bright kids." I didn't realize I had been crying, until Josh leaned forward and wiped away one of the tears. He placed his hand on mine in a comforting way and I continued.

"We were just talking and singing along to the radio randomly and out of nowhere," I took a deep breath and wiped my face," Out of nowhere this truck that wasn't paying attention sideswiped us on the highway..." I just took another deep breath and looked at Josh.

"Mom and Devin, who were in the front seat, were killed instantly after the Tahoe flipped six times and flew off the side of the overpass. Zack and Elenor were in the ICU for a few weeks before they succumbed to the massive amounts of Trauma. They still don't know why, but I only had a fractured skull, a broken leg, and a bunch of cuts." The tears were falling again. Josh moved the box of photos before pulling me into his lap and just holding me.

I cried and cried. The accident is something only Trina really knew about and something I hadn't spoken about in nearly five years. It wasn't something that haunted me anymore, but it was definitely still hard to talk about. After a few minutes though, I had calmed down to just some sniffles and Josh rubbed my back.

"Trina said that I told you I wanted to keep us a secret because I didn't remember what it was like to have a family. I didn't want you to think that. I didn't mean to do it. I swear... I'm sorry." He just sighed.

"I don't think that, I'm sorry this all happened to you..." I just sighed and sat up, rubbing my face on my shirt and ever so grateful that I had forgone wearing makeup today.

"It's in the past, I just haven't told anyone for five years. I'm sorry I cried all over your shirt..." I chuckled as he waved me off.

"Well, the shirt can be washed. Now I get to tell you what I've been thinking about the last week." He sat up and I moved next to him on the couch.

"I want to be with you. If that means hiding it until you're ready then I'm ok with that. Annabel, please be my girlfriend?" I smiled at him.

"I would love that..." He leaned forward and kissed me.

We both sat back and smiled at each other. That's when I noticed how dark the circles were under his eyes.

"When's the last time you slept?" He took a deep breath and looked up thinking about it.

"Uh on the plane to Mexico yesterday morning..." My eyes bugged out at him.

"Go back up to my room and take a nap. I have to help Trina start prepping for thanksgiving." He nodded as I went to grab the box and put it back for another few years, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me down so I was straddling him.

"Hey," I blushed at our current position,"You're my girlfriend now." He smirked at me.

"Oh Little Drummer Boy," I kissed him chastely," Just think of all the fun we'll have..."