Where's Daddy?
Chapter 1
‘Look Mummy, it Daddy!’
I turned to my daughter and ran my hand through her pigtails, letting her smooth hair flow through my fingers.
‘Honey, come on. We have to go home.’
‘But it Daddy! He says we should go to him. I want to go to him! Look!’
She pointed towards the empty bus stop, her hand bobbing up and down in her desperate need to get my attention. I made a show of turning in that direction, feeling her shaking beside me in excitement as she waited eagerly for my permission.
‘Pleeeease can I go?’
I turned and squatted down to her level, cupping her face in my hands and forcing her to look at me. Grace had had trouble accepting Karl’s death, and was constantly trying to convince me that he was still around. As a five year old, she had almost no concept of death and therefore couldn’t understand where her father had gone. Ignoring the creaking complaints from my ankles, I decided to try and explain to her one more time that he would never come back.
‘Ok hun, Daddy’s gone away to the angels in heaven. You remember the angels, don’t you? From Sunday school?’
Grace nodded, her face falling as she realised I didn’t believe her.
‘Well, he’s gonna be looked after by the angels for a very long time. You remember how you can talk to him, don’t you? The secret phone?’
More nods from Grace. 'I close my hands and my eyes and do the sign of the cross and then he will hear everything I say. But Mummy, why don’t he talk to me? What if the phone is broke?’
I sighed again and tried to explain how it was a one-way telephone, but I could tell that she wasn’t buying it.
‘He waves to me sometimes. He’s waving now!’
I sighed in defeat and stood up, my knees protesting loudly, and told her we were going home.
I turned to my daughter and ran my hand through her pigtails, letting her smooth hair flow through my fingers.
‘Honey, come on. We have to go home.’
‘But it Daddy! He says we should go to him. I want to go to him! Look!’
She pointed towards the empty bus stop, her hand bobbing up and down in her desperate need to get my attention. I made a show of turning in that direction, feeling her shaking beside me in excitement as she waited eagerly for my permission.
‘Pleeeease can I go?’
I turned and squatted down to her level, cupping her face in my hands and forcing her to look at me. Grace had had trouble accepting Karl’s death, and was constantly trying to convince me that he was still around. As a five year old, she had almost no concept of death and therefore couldn’t understand where her father had gone. Ignoring the creaking complaints from my ankles, I decided to try and explain to her one more time that he would never come back.
‘Ok hun, Daddy’s gone away to the angels in heaven. You remember the angels, don’t you? From Sunday school?’
Grace nodded, her face falling as she realised I didn’t believe her.
‘Well, he’s gonna be looked after by the angels for a very long time. You remember how you can talk to him, don’t you? The secret phone?’
More nods from Grace. 'I close my hands and my eyes and do the sign of the cross and then he will hear everything I say. But Mummy, why don’t he talk to me? What if the phone is broke?’
I sighed again and tried to explain how it was a one-way telephone, but I could tell that she wasn’t buying it.
‘He waves to me sometimes. He’s waving now!’
I sighed in defeat and stood up, my knees protesting loudly, and told her we were going home.
♠ ♠ ♠
It begins