Better for You

After a really relaxing day at the beach I was sat in the passenger’s side of Harry’s car, resting my head back on the head rest as he drove us both back to my dorm.

“Is Lucy ok?” I asked Harry softly, the thought had been running around in my head – she had clearly been around Harry a lot recently and I had gotten the impression that she was going through something.

“Not really, she’s going through some shit at the moment.” Harry answered and I nodded my head. My curiosity only grew after Harry’s response however I knew that it wasn’t my place to ask what was going on with her seeing as we don’t really get along at the best of times.

“Well she seems like a strong person so I’m sure that she’ll be alright in the end.” I commented and Harry looked at me with an alarmed expression on his face as he eyed me cautiously before returning his attention to the road. “What?” I asked Harry.

“Are you feeling well?” Harry asked me and I frowned at him in confusion.

“Yes?” I answered, although it came out more like a question that a statement. “Why?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say anything even remotely pleasant when it comes to Lucy, so why are you being polite about her – you can’t stand the girl, Izzy.” Harry answered me.

“Well I mean I’m not Lucy’s biggest fan and I wouldn’t trust her with anything but if she’s going through something that doesn’t mean that I don’t want her to be ok – I don’t like Lucy but I don’t wish bad things upon her.” I replied as I watched the trees that we passed out of the passenger window.

“And that’s why I love you.” Harry commented after and a childish grin covered my face as I turned to face him and I saw elements of adoration shining in his beautiful green eyes.

“Damn it Harry, you’re making me blush.” I grumbled causing laughter to erupt from Harry as I covered my cheeks with my hands to try to hide the blood that was gushing to my cheeks.

The rest of the car journey was very relaxed and was spent with my hand resting in Harry’s as we listened to the voice of The Weeknd playing through the speakers.

When we reached my dorm, Harry checked his phone and his face dropped instantly and my stomach dropped at his expression. “You ok?” asked Harry wearily and he raised his head to look at me with guilt in his eyes.

“I’m really sorry to do this, but something’s come up and I’ve got to go.” Harry told me and I nodded my head gently as I looked at the ground, my gut telling me that this had something to do with Lucy.

“Ok, well I had a nice day with you anyway, when will I see you again?” I asked Harry quietly.

“I’m not sure; are you free the day after tomorrow?” Harry questioned.

“I’m working most of the day and evening but I’m free for a bit in the morning?” I replied and Harry nodded his head reluctantly in response.

“Ok, well I’ll let you know if I can see you then.” Harry answered and I gave him a tight smile and pecked his lips lightly before he left and the unsettling feel returned to my stomach as I could only hope that things wouldn’t return to how they were before and that Harry would keep his word.

With an exaggerated sigh, I made my way back to my dorm and a shriek escaped from my lips when I came in to find Abby on top of Niall with very little clothing on.

“Shit, sorry Izzy we thought you’d be out longer.” Abby apologised as she grabbed her top and put in on and crawled off of Niall.

“Well you’re just lucky Harry didn’t come inside with me!” I told Abby and she scrunched up her nose in response.

“So you saw Harry today then?” Abby asked me in a surprised voice as she moved to sit on her bed next to Niall and I also went to sit down on my own bed.

“Yeah, he came over this morning and apologised for everything that he had done this past week and not being there on New Year’s Eve.” I responded in monotonous voice.

“And you forgave him?” Niall asked and I sighed, rubbing my tired eyes with my hands.

“I did,” I my voice rising in pitch towards the end, “I mean Harry seemed really sorry and I wanted to believe him because I don’t like fighting with him and we then spent a really nice day together on the beach.”

“But?” Abby asked, clearly knowing that something else was bugging me in the back of my mind.

“I don’t know, maybe I’m overreacting, but after our day out he got a text and he left abruptly, again, and this uneasy feeling that I’ve had in my gut returned again and I just feel like something’s not quite right.” I answered and Abby and Niall both nodded.

“Is this the feeling that you had when you got back from your Christmas trip?” Abby asked and I simply nodded my head to confirm her question. “Maybe you should listen to your gut then?” Abby told me and suddenly my stomach dropped after hearing to her question, not entirely sure what she meant by it.

“Wh-what are you saying?” I asked Abby, my mouth feeling dry, my palms get sweaty and my heart thumping loudly in my chest.
“I’m not saying break-up with Harry or anything, but just don’t ignore the feeling – if something doesn’t feel right then maybe that’s because something isn’t right.” Abby suggested with a soft voice but it still felt like a stabbing knife.

“Ok.” I managed to somehow croak out as I stood up from my bed with my body feeling like jelly. I decided that I needed some space and time to myself and so I picked up my toiletry bag, some clothes and towel and went to the showers.

My mind was racing from what Abby had said, was my gut right?

No.

Surely not.

It couldn’t be; I can’t lose Harry.

And that was when I came to the realisation of how intense my feelings towards Harry were. I was always aware of how much Harry meant to me, but the thought of losing him was too much for my brain to handle – I couldn’t process the possibility of having to let Harry go.

Was this wrong? Was it wrong for the thought of losing Harry to petrify me to this extent? I don’t think that I could exist without Harry, I couldn’t breathe without Harry – so how could I listen to my gut if it told me that something was wrong?

Harry gave me his word that he wouldn’t hurt me, he loves me and he promised that he wouldn’t let me down again and so I should believe him. Harry loves me and he won’t hurt me so I should trust him and not my gut.

I came out of the shower feeling slightly better than I had when I had first gotten into the shower but there was still an unsettling feeling in my stomach that I had now decided to ignore.

As I got back into the dorm Abby and Niall were both watching a movie on Abby’s bed. It was only around 6 but they both seemed very comfortable and I didn’t fancy third wheeling the two of them so I texted Andy if she was free for me to come over and she quickly replied that she was free but warned me that she was a mess.

I frowned at her response but went upstairs to her dorm nonetheless and I knocked on the door. Andy opened the door and I was surprised to Andy with blood shot eyes, smudged mascara and a sniffling nose. I instinctively wrapped my arms around Andy’s figure and I felt her body melt into mine as she exhaled loudly.

“What’s happened?” I asked Andy tentatively as I pulled back away from her and she lowered her gaze, refusing to look me in the eyes. “Andy?” I pushed.

“It’s nothing, I’m being silly.” Andy mumbled and I frowned and rested my hands on her shoulders and crouched so that I could make eye contact with Andy as I looked into her watery chocolate eyes.

“Andy, you are not silly and you are feeling what you are feeling for a reason.” I told her and she nodded her head at me and gave me a watery smile.

“Lucy came over and told me to stay away from Zayn or that she would make Zayn stay away from me.” Andy said and I frowned, shocked at what Andy was saying Lucy had done.

“What?! Why did she do that?” I asked Andy and she shook her head, rubbing her face with her hands.

“She’s being going through a lot and Zayn has tried to be there for her as a friend, but she wants him to be with her all the time; which obviously Zayn said he couldn’t do because he has a lift and also because he doesn’t want to mess up what we have at the moment.” Andy answered and my heart felt heavier in my chest as I knew that Harry hadn’t made that same sacrifice for me. “And I guess that Lucy was pissed off with me because of that and so she made sure that I knew that.” Andy explained and I frowned, shaking my head at Lucy’s actions.

“That’s ridiculous Andy, what Lucy did was mean and manipulative and you should tell Zayn about it because it’s really out of line, Lucy going behind Zayn’s back and saying that stuff to you.” I told Andy and her expression faltered as she looked at me with uncertainty in her eyes.

“What if he doesn’t believe me or chooses Lucy over me?” Andy asked me and I rolled my eyes at her and shook my head.

“Andy; Zayn has made it clear from day one with Lucy that he is not going to let her issues come between what you and him have, so there is no way that Zayn is going to let what Lucy said to you end what you have. He clearly cares about you a lot.” I told Andy and she nodded her head and sighed.

“Ok, you’re right, but what I need right now is a distraction.” Andy told me and I grinned at her.

“Don’t worry, I have the perfect distraction.” I promised Andy as I got up the Zac Efron and Dave Franco movie Neighbours and allowed us both to distract ourselves from the manipulative girl who was trying to destroy our love lives, with the beautiful men that are Zac Efron and Dave Franco.