Worlds Apart

Thursday, November 10th

Tires crunched on the gravel in our driveway, pulling me out of my fitful nap. I hadn’t slept on the couch in years and now I knew why. My whole body was stiff and sore, and I was absolutely freezing despite having Dustin laying almost entirely on top of me.

I heard a door shut, and my heart fluttered with excitement. Barb?! Was she here to pick me up for school? Maybe I’d slept in! I struggled to sit up, stuck by the tangle of my brother’s limbs in mine. With a sigh, I carefully picked his arms and legs off me, pushed him back onto the cushions, and finally sat upright.

After wiping his drool off my arm, I stood up and hurried to the front door to peek out of our window. My breath caught painfully in my throat; Don was walking towards the house.

“Dustin!” I hissed, scrambling back to the couch and shaking him. He woke with a start and looked around wildly. “Don’s home! Get your stuff and go to Mike’s!”

I had no idea what time it was, but if he was out of the house Don couldn’t hurt him. I tugged him up and shoved him down the hall as I heard keys in the lock. Panic set in deep; I hadn’t cleaned anything up from the night before, too focused on Dustin and Barb to worry about dishes.

There was no time to do anything. I stood, rooted to the carpet with fear as the door swung open. Don took two steps inside, and instantly a scowl settled over his face.

“You gotta be shittin’ me.”

I couldn’t speak. I didn’t move as he threw his briefcase to the ground and shoved past me into the kitchen. I heard dishes clanking on the table, heard him curse under his breath, and then a plate shattered behind me.

“You gotta be shittin’ me!” he roared; I couldn’t help flinching down into myself as another plate shattered. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and saw Dustin peeking out, ready to leave. I motioned for him to wait a sec, and I took a breath.

Do it for Dustin, I told myself, shoving my fear down as I turned around to face Don.

“I’m sorry,” I said quietly, hiding the tremor in my voice. I carefully picked my way into the kitchen - over the plate shards - and positioned myself so Don had his back to the hall.

A moment later, I saw Dustin creeping past us.

"I'm gone for a couple days and you can't fucking handle that?"

"One of Dustin's friends -"

"I don't give a damn about your bullshit excuses! When I tell you I want this house spotless, I mean I want this goddamn house spotless!" he snarled, and took a step towards me. Dustin, at the door, paused and looked back. I shifted my eyes quickly to hold Don's furious stare and waved Dustin off discreetly.

When I didn't answer, Don took a step back and started to turn around. I knew better than to argue with him, but if he saw Dustin sneaking out... I had to hold his attention.

"I wasn't making excuses," I said, voice quiet but strong. Don stopped turning instantly and his head snapped back around to look at me. "Dustin’s best friend was found dead and we weren’t thinking about housework."

I risked a glance and saw the door click shut. Dustin was out. He was safe -

Don's hands locked like vices around my upper arms and hauled me back, slamming me into the fridge. A cry of pain left me involuntarily and one of his hands came up to slap me hard across the face.

I forced my whimpers back down and held perfectly still as he knelt to get in my face. His hand came back to my other arm, and he squeezed harder. Tears came to my eyes and I willed myself not to make a sound.

"Look at me." I slowly lifted my gaze up to his. He leaned even closer as he said slowly, "you ever talk back to me again, you'll be the next kid to be found dead. Do you understand me?"

"Yes sir," I whispered. Before I could brace myself Don threw me aside. I stumbled and fell into the table, slumping to the ground.

"I want this shit cleaned up by the time I get home tonight."

With that he stepped over me, grabbed his briefcase, and disappeared down the hall into mom's room. The second the door slammed I shoved to my feet. There was a deep ache in my ribs where I'd hit the table, and my arms hurt like hell, but I was okay. More importantly, Dustin was okay.

I scurried down the hall and slipped into my room, shutting the door silently as I took a few calming breaths to try and slow the fear and misery coursing through me.

You're okay. Dusty's okay. It's okay, I chanted to myself as I got dressed. Don't cry. Just don't cry. Don't let him hear you break.

Thankfully, the old bruises on my neck and jaw were all but faded and my sweater would cover everything else that had just happened. The moment I was decent, I opened my door just enough to poke my head through.

The door to mom's room was still shut; I grabbed my backpack and scampered back down the hall. The dishes could wait. Right now I needed a few moments for myself. Snagging my school bag, I slipped out the front door, eased it closed as quietly as I could, and then took off.

I didn't stop running until I hit the old railroad tracks that wound through the forest. I followed them a few yards north to make sure I couldn't be seen from the main road, and I finally let myself rest.

A sob racked through me and I dropped to the ground, slumping back against a tree and tucking my legs to my chest as I buried my face in my knees. I cried from the pain, from the frustration. The fear and the hatred that welled in me from Don. I cried for my mom, for my dad. God, I missed my dad. I cried for my baby brother mixed up in this great big pile of shit.

I cried for Will. For Jonathan and Joyce, and oh god I cried for Barb. My best friend. No, she was more than that. She'd been the other half of me since I was thirteen and having her gone - wherever the hell she was - hurt even worse than everything else together. Because she fixed all the other crap that went wrong. And without her...

God, I had to stop myself. If I kept dwelling on all the shit falling apart around me, I'd fall apart too. And that couldn't happen. For an immeasurable amount of time I stayed curled in on myself as I let my crying die down. Once the sobbing had reduced to sniffles, I got to my feet and took a deep, slow breath. For just a moment, I buried my face in my hands and shut my eyes tight like I did when I was little.

"There you go, Ally cat," dad said, rubbing my back gently. I peeked out from my hands to see him smiling down at me. "It's all okay. You're okay. Can you say it with me? I'm okay."

"I'm okay," I whispered; his smile grew warmer as he said it with me again.

"I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay."

"I'm okay," I whispered, lifting my head up and letting out a shaking breath. Dad wasn't at my side. I wasn't on the couch with him, safe and warm and away from all this pain and sadness.

I was having a breakdown in the middle of the forest, making myself late for school. I let out a heavy sigh, then took a deep breath and started my trek back to the main road. At this rate I'd just have to walk to school and accept my fate. I was never tardy so hopefully I wouldn't get in too much trouble this time.

As I got to the edge of the forest, I heard the sound of bikes peddling and voices in the distance. I stayed hidden in the trees and watched as Dustin and Lucas rode past me heading away from school.

"I don't know! Mike just said we had to get there now," Lucas argued to my little brother as they zoomed around the corner.

So first he was sneaking out at night, then he raided our cupboards and left an hour early, and now he was skipping school? I hiked my backpack up onto my shoulders, wiped the last of the tears off my cheeks, and headed after the boys.

School could wait. I had a mystery to solve.

-x-

By the time I got to the Wheeler's, it was just past nine and the cars were gone from their driveway. I circled around the back of the house and narrowed my eyes at the bikes lying by the basement door.

Were they all skipping school because of Will? Dustin and I hadn't gotten to talk this morning, but he had to have been broken up. And Lucas and Mike... Well, I'd check up on them and make sure they were all okay.

And then I can be the cool big sister when I don't bust any of them, I added, feeling pretty good about my plan. I raised my hand to knock and cut off hearing Lucas argue,

“They pulled Will’s body out of the water! He’s dead!”

“Well maybe it’s his ghost,” Dustin reasoned. “Maybe he’s haunting us!”

Wait, what?

“It’s not his ghost!”

“Then what is it?”

"I don’t know! All I know is Will is alive. Will is alive! We just have to find him!”

Okay, what the hell was going on?! Was this denial? Were they really thinking Will was still alive? Enough eavesdropping; I knocked on the door and the talking stopped instantly.

"Dustin? Lucas? Mike?" I called; I heard the boys scrambling. "You're not in trouble. I promise. I just wanted to make sure you're alright -"

"Don't! She can't know about -"

"No, this is good! We need an adult! This is out of control!"

"She's not an adult, she's my sister!"

"Guys! She can hear us!"

There was a moment of silence; I sighed and agreed,

"I can. Just open the door. Whatever you need an adult for, I can -"

A moment later the door was wrenched open. Lucas stared up at me in relief for a heartbeat before Dustin tackled him aside.

"Okay, look," Mike said, angling himself in the crack of the door; I could see Dustin and Lucas wrestling with each other over his shoulder. What the hell was going on?! Mike had on the most serious expression I'd ever seen from him; he stared up at me for a moment and then said slowly, "we could sort of use your help. But if you agree to help us, you can't say a word to anyone."

"Not mom, or Nancy, or Jonathan," Dustin huffed, letting Lucas go but keeping him back. "Or Mike's parents. Or Lucas's parents. Or Hopper. Or -"

"Okay, okay," I cut in, holding my hands up; anything to figure out what was going on to make sure they were alright. "I won't tell anyone."

The boys shared a long look, and Mike leaned back around the door to look inside. After another tense heartbeat he turned to look at me and ask solemnly,

"Promise?"

I looked at all the boys and gave a nod.

"Promise."

Mike took a breath and stepped back, opening up the basement door. Dustin took my hand and pulled me inside, leading me towards a table with blankets strewn over it. As I came around the front of it, I froze.

A young, terrified girl was staring up at me with big doe eyes, huddled into herself and the blankets she was nested in. She met my alarmed stare for a heartbeat and then dropped her gaze, shuffling down further into the blankets and clutching Mike’s talkie to her chest.

"This is Eleven. El for short," Mike said as he came up to us. He knelt down next to the girl - El - and gave her a reassuring smile. "El, this is Dustin's big sister Ally, short for Allison."

El glanced at Mike, and then looked back up to me. What the actual hell was going on here?! Who was this kid? Why was she hiding out in Mike’s basement? Why were the boys keeping me sworn to secrecy? Why were none of them broken up over Will? What was going on?!

Dustin tugged my hand, motioning for me to sit down. I slowly sank to my knees; El shifted back a hint when I was eye-level.

"It's okay, El. She won't hurt you. She promised not to tell anyone about you."

"Promise?" she asked in a quiet voice, looking straight at me. I blanched for a heartbeat and then nodded quickly.

"I-I promise," I managed, and then had to ask, "but can someone please explain why you think Will’s alive?”

“It’s... kind of a long story,” Lucas eased, settling on the ground next to me as Dustin did the same on my other side. I shrugged and tucked my legs under myself, glancing around the circle of suspicious kids.

“Start talking, then. We’ve got plenty of time.”

I had no idea who El was or what the boys were up to or what the hell was going on but they'd trusted me with their secret and I was here to help. The boys seemed to realize I was getting in on this because instead of being defensive, they started talking.

-x-

“So…” I trailed, glancing down at El as I paced past her again. She watched me pass as I continued, “you have super powers. Like, shutting the door with your mind kinda powers.”

El nodded.

“’Kay. And because of that, there are bad men after you. And,” I added, glancing at the boys, “we can’t tell anyone because if we do, they’ll find you. And we’ll all…”

El mimed the gun again and I blew out a breath; my mind hadn’t shut off since the moment she started talking. First, Will went missing. Then Barb went missing. Now, a strange, telekinetic girl was running from psycho murderers.

And that thing. That thing in Steve’s pool – the dream. I still couldn’t remember all of it, but I remembered the feeling. I remembered Barb’s lifeless eyes; they hadn’t left me, and I didn’t think they ever would. This couldn’t be coincidence -

The boys let out a chorus of groans and I paused my pacing to turn and frown at them.

“What?”

“You don’t believe us,” Mike accused, and I furrowed my brow, opening my mouth to argue. “I knew it. I knew we shouldn’t have said anything. Your sister’s gonna blab and get us all in trouble –“

“I said no, Lucas said yes!” Dustin argued. “Ally’s like, the worst option we could have picked. She’s got too much of a conscience to keep a secret –“

“Hey!” I cut in. “Guys –“

“Ally’s not the problem. The problem is the freak sitting under the table –“

“Lucas,” I chastised, giving El an apologetic glance before scowling at them. “Guys.”

“What do we do? We’re in deep shit. Deep. Shit!”

“Guys!” All three of them cut off, turning to stare at me perplexed. “Would you listen to me? I’m not gonna say anything!”

“What?” Dustin asked, genuinely surprised. “You’re like, the biggest narc on the planet –“

I rolled my eyes. “Thanks for that. If you’d listen to me, I could tell you that I actually believe you guys.” The talkie clunked on the floor; I glanced down at El. She was staring at me just as surprised as the boys. “Am I not speaking English or something?”

“You believe us?” Mike asked slowly; I nodded. “You like. You really, really believe us?”

“I do. Look. My friend, Barb, she’s missing too.” They all exchanged slow looks. “She went to a party with Nancy the other night, and she never came home. That night I had a dream.”

“About Barb?” Lucas asked; I nodded quickly. El leaned forward just a hint as I pressed on.

“I don’t really remember it. I just… it was this terrible feeling. This sinking, scared feeling in the pit of my stomach. All I remember are her eyes staring at me. Lifeless. I went to Steve’s yesterday, and I swear I heard her.”

“Was she there?” Dustin asked, brow furrowed as he watched me nervously. All of them looked on-edge, which made me feel a little better. Finally, someone was actually listening to me about this. Granted, they were kids. But still!

“No,” I said slowly. “But I kept hearing her. Calling my name, like she was scared. And I saw this… thing. In the pool. It – it didn’t have a face.”

All the kids shared wide-eyed looks, so I said quickly,

“I – I know it sounds ridiculous. And I would’ve thought it was my imagination. But I saw the same thing at Will’s house a few nights ago –“

“What?!” they all shrieked, jaws actually dropping. El and I both flinched, and we shared a look as Mike asked,

“What the hell happened at Will’s house?!”

“Language,” I warned; El sat up straighter and fixed me with an excited stare.

“English,” she said, giving me a nod in support. I stifled a snort and shrugged.

“You’re right. Anyways,” I sighed, turning to the boys again. I went over my visit with Joyce, repeating the part about the faceless thing in the window twice. By the end, we were all slumped on ground around me in various states of shock and concern.

“This isn’t good,” Mike declared; I didn’t argue. I felt a little crazy, agreeing with a handful of twelve-year-olds, but… well, shit. They were onto something. And it was the best lead I’d found for Barb yet.

“That settles it,” Dustin said, clapping his hands together as he turned to El. “We need to try and get in touch with Will.”

“You really think it was him that you heard earlier?” I asked them, crouching down as El began to fiddle with the talkie. She, Mike, and Dustin nodded, but Lucas seemed skeptical.

“It was hard to tell,” he reasoned, giving the boys looks as they frowned. “It’s all hard to believe. And I need more than crying to convince me this isn’t just crazy.”

“So what, seeing her shut a door with her mind isn’t enough to convince you this is real?!” Dustin argued; Lucas scoffed.

“The freak shutting a door isn’t the same as our dead friend coming back to life and crying on the walkie talkie!”

“Hey, be nice,” I told him, frowning as I saw El’s eyes drop again. The boys didn’t acknowledge me. I gave up, sitting back and listening to them go back and forth, watching El fiddle with the talkie as Mike tried to help. Finally, he slumped back and dropped his hands in his lap.

“This isn’t gonna work,” he cut in, thankfully silencing the other two. “We need to get El to a stronger radio.”

I was at a loss, but of course the nerdy boys around me weren’t. They all shared a knowing look as Dustin said excitedly,

“Mr. Clarke’s Heathkit Ham Shack!”

“The what?” I asked; they ignored me as Mike nodded enthusiastically.

“The Heathkit’s at school. There’s no way we’re gonna get the weirdo in there without anyone noticing,” Lucas sighed, waving his hand in El’s direction. “I mean, look at her!”

She dropped her eyes and I smacked his arm.

“Don’t be a jerk,” I chastised, and turned a smile towards El. “We’ll get you dressed up and no one will be wiser.”

She looked up in surprise as I stood and nodded towards the stairs.

“I’m sure we can find some of Nancy’s old stuff somewhere. We’ll get you disguised and then we can sneak into the school. Get to the AC club –“

“AV club,” Dustin and Mike corrected; I rolled my eyes as I held out a hand to El. She looked up at me, smile slowly spreading, and took my hand.

-x-

“There,” I said with a smile, sitting back on Nancy’s bed and setting her lip-gloss aside. Mike studied my work; a soft, pink blush spread over his cheeks as he took in her new appearance. Oh, he was so crushing on her.

El blinked up at me as I got to my feet, then turned her eyes to Mike. They were staring at one another, both at a loss for words; I’d give them a moment. I slipped into the hall and jogged down the steps, leaning around into the basement stairwell.

“You guys find anything yet?” My brother’s mop of curls poked out from the bottom of the steps. Wordlessly, he held up what looked suspiciously like a Star Wars costume. I gave him a frown. “No.”

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” he t’sked. I rolled my eyes as Lucas appeared at his side and held up an old pink dress.

“Much better,” I said, giving Dustin a pointed look as Lucas smirked at him in victory. My brother held up a finger, disappearing for a few moments as Lucas jogged up the steps and handed me the dress. Dustin leaned back around to show me a blonde wig.

“Atta boy. C'mon, let’s hurry.”

He tossed me the wig and I hustled up the stairs, almost colliding with Mike as he came out of Nancy’s room. I held up the disguise and he smiled, taking them and handing them back to El. Dustin and Lucas joined us as Nancy‘s door shut, and we waited as El got dressed. After a few minutes, the door open and El’s head poked out.

“Ally.” I came up to the door and she stepped back, holding up the wig with one hand, holding her dress in place with the other. With a smile, I slipped inside and shut the door.

“Turn around,” I told her, and she obeyed instantly. I zipped up the dress for her, and then took the wig. She was – frustratingly – almost as tall as me. It wasn’t a hard feat, with me being a whopping 5’3, but still.

“Sit on the bed,” I told her, and she settled immediately, watching in Nancy’s mirror as I fixed the wig onto her head. Once it was done, she got to her feet and slowly walked to her reflection. She ran her hand over the blonde locks and a smile came to her face. I walked up behind her, settled my hands on her shoulders, and gave a smile.

“It’s fun to dress up,” I said gently as she met my eyes. “But I think you looked just fine without all this.”

She smiled a bit more as she studied herself again. I saw her brow furrow, and she reached out to rest a hand on a picture taped to the mirror. It was an older one of Nancy and Barb; my heart twisted as I stared at my best friend. Her finger tapped Barb’s face and my eyes widened just a bit.

“Barb,” she declared, meeting my eyes again. I swallowed hard and gave a simple nod. El studied her a moment longer and smiled, pulling her hand away. “Pretty.”

“Very pretty,” I agreed, thankfully pushing the tears back. I reached forward and tapped her reflection as I added, “both of you.”

We were both smiling as we headed out of Nancy’s room. All three boys stared at her in astonishment, but Mike was the one that stopped breathing. He was transfixed.

“Wow,” Dustin said, thankfully breaking the silence as I leaned against the doorframe, watching the kids. It was absolutely adorable. “She looks -”

“Pretty,” Mike said, and his eyes widened when he realized what he’d let slip out. He saw the smirk on my face and backtracked, “good. You look pretty good.”

Lucas and I shared a bemused look over Mike’s head as he gave me a look to be quiet. As El studied herself in the mirror, I jerked my head towards the stairs.

“Ready?”

El, Dustin, Lucas, and Mike shared a last look, and then turned to me.

“Ready.”

-x-

Mr. Clarke nudged my arm as the assembly came to a close, and I glanced up at him. In his hand were the keys to the AV room, that we’d found locked earlier. I took them with a smile as he turned to leave.

“I’ve got papers to grade, so I’ll be here for the rest of the day. You and the kids take as much time as you need with the Heathkit.”

“Thank you, Mr. Clarke,” I told him with a genuine smile, stepping aside to let the kids pass. He’d been my science teacher when I first got to Hawkins, and I knew how much Dustin and the boys loved him. Even now, he was stepping up and taing care of them the best way he knew how. “Really. This will help them out more than you know.”

“Anything else you all need, you just let me know. Take care, Allison,” he said, and disappeared into the swarm of kids. Man, if I could ever find a way to get rid of Don, I was hooking mom up with Mr. Clarke ASAP.

I turned back towards the gym, expecting the kids to be at my side, and frowned when I saw they were missing. The frown deepened seeing Mike, El, Lucas, and Dustin standing in the center of a group of kids, facing off against two boys I didn’t know.

This can’t be good, I sighed, starting to pick my way towards them, struggling through the sea of endless middle-schoolers (some of which were actually freaking taller than me). As I was nearly there, I saw the unknown boys turning to leave. My kids looked upset; well, more accurately, Lucas and Dustin looked upset. Mike and El looked pissed.

Without warning, Mike surged forward and slammed is hands into the back of one of the boys, sending him to the ground. The kids gathered around – myself, Lucas, and Dustin included – all ooh’d as Mike balled his fists.

“You’re dead, Wheeler!” the kid snarled as he got to his feet. I surged forward, trying to reach Mike before he did.

“Hey!” I shouted; no one even acknowledged me. Damn short legs!

“Dead!” he bellowed, and lunged to attack Mike. Just inches from him, though, the kid froze. I was so surprised I actually stopped, standing along with the other kids as we watched. On instinct I glanced back at my other kids; Lucas and Dustin were gaping, but El was focused. She was glaring at the kid, fists balled, eyes slowly narrowing. A trickle of blood ran from her nose. And then one of the kids beside me gasped,

“Dude! Troy peed himself!”

I couldn’t help it, I started laughing. Dustin and Lucas were cackling behind Mike, who had turned to look at El. She gave a small smile as she wiped her nose, which confirmed what I’d thought. El seriously did have mind powers, and she’d just used them to make a kid pee himself.

Freaking awesome.

I caught sight of a teacher making his way towards the group. I rushed forward and snagged Mike’s arm, motioning to El and the others.

“Let’s go!” I hissed, holding up the keys. They all surged after me as I led the way out of the gym. I handed the keys to Mike, and ushered them all inside before following and shutting the door, locking it for good measure.

“Now what?” I asked them, leaning against the door as I watched the kids gather around what I assumed to be the Heathkit. Mike turned it on and gave me a glance, nodding to El.

“She’ll find Will.”

El closed her eyes, and the boys gathered closer. I took a step towards them, intrigued now.

“She’s doing it! She's finding him!” Mike said excitedly as Dustin woah’d and gave me an excited grin.

“Calm down. She just closed her eyes -” Lucas began, and the lightbulb above us shattered. I jumped towards them as they all gasped. And slowly, noises came through the radio. Loud, heavy banging.

“What’s that?” I whispered, hedging up to Dustin and leaning over El with them. The banging intensified, so loud it was echoing in the room. And then Will’s scared, timid voice called out,

“Mom?”

“Oh my god,” I breathed, hand coming up to my mouth as I stared at the radio in disbelief.

“No way,” Lucas gasped; we shared a look of holy actual shit as Will’s voice grew louder.

“Mom... please... Mom!”

The boys started shouting at the radio, like they expected Will to hear them. I nudged all of them and shook my head.

“I don’t think this is two-way, guys. Listen! I think – I think he’s talking to Joyce...”

“Mom, it’s coming! It’s... it’s like home, but it’s so dark... it’s so dark and empty! And it’s cold!”

We all stared at the radio, horrified and amazed, listening to Will. Just twelve hours ago they’d found his ‘body’, and now he was talking through a radio while a psychic little girl pulled in his signal.

The radio sparked, and immediately I tugged the boys back.

“That’s not good -” I started, and another voice came through the radio.

“Ally?” My entire body ran cold and the breath left me instantly. That was Barb. Clear as day, that was my best friend’s voice calling out on the radio. The boys looked back at me in shock as I gaped at the radio. “Are you there, Ally?”

“Barb!” I shouted, ignoring the fact that I knew this wasn’t a two-way thing. “Barb, I’m here!”

“Ally -”

The Heathkit sparked again and flames burst around it. All of us jumped back; I grabbed the chair El was in and hauled her back from the table as Dustin scampered around me and grabbed the fire extinguisher.

As Dustin put the fire out, Mike and I knelt in front of El.

“Are you okay?” he asked her quickly; she blinked, but didn’t respond. I gently cupped her face, patting her cheek.

“El? Can you move?”

She turned her gaze to me, but she was fading. Right on the verge of passing out. I could hear kids running and screaming in the halls as the fire alarm went off. Shit. I motioned to the boys as I hiked up my leggings.

“Get the door, get the door,” I said quickly, and then wrapped my arms around El’s waist. Thank God she was small. Bending with my knees, I maneuvered her upper body over my shoulder and then stood, holding her in an awkward fireman’s carry. Dustin flung the door open while Lucas and Mike raced out of the room, checking the hall.

They motioned for me to follow; Dustin and I raced out of the AV room and all but sprinted down the hall, El bouncing on my shoulder as we made for the bikes. The boys got on and I sat El on her feet, helping her onto Mike’s bike before jumping onto Dustin’s.

My mind was racing faster than we were riding; I had to hold onto Dustin to keep myself steady as my head began to spin. I had no idea where, I had even less of an idea how, but Barb was alive. My best friend, wherever she was right now, she was alive.

Barb was alive.