Status: on hiatus (1/5/2018)

When Hearts Collide

Can't Keep It Between Us

The wedding ceremony had been absolutely beautiful.

After the initial chaos died down and everyone settled into their seats, the music began and the young ring bearer and flower girl made their way down the aisle. Everyone adored the young pair. At one point, the ring bearer reached his hand into the white, wicker basket of paper-thin, pale pink petals that the flower girl was holding. He threw them up into the air, well over their heads. This received a laugh from many of the guests.

Following after the toddlers were Heather's bridesmaids. The bridesmaids looked divine in their blushing pink gowns. All five of them had their hair pinned partially up while the rest of their hair cascaded down their backs in tight curls. They made their way down the aisle one at a time, big, pearly smiles on their faces. Charlie watched as they took their place on the other side of the altar as the groomsmen.

When Heather appeared at the end of the aisle, everyone in the church rose to their feet. Heather gripped the arm of her father tightly, clinging to his side. Charlie all but held her breath as the beautiful brunette made her way toward the altar. She looked gorgeous in her princess gown, twinkling with diamonds. Her makeup was simply flawless, even as tears threatened to spill. Looking to the front of the church, Charlie could see that Caleb was also teary-eyed.

Though the minister had asked them to sing a few too many hymns for Charlie's liking, she enjoyed the ceremony nonetheless. When she wasn't admiring the happy couple at the front of the room, she often found her eyes wandering over to where Jamie was standing at her brother's side. He looked so handsome in his suit. A handful of times, they exchanged glances. Charlie couldn't deny the way her heart skipped a beat whenever Jamie smiled at her.

However, Charlie was relieved when Caleb and Heather finally set off down the aisle. She stood, smoothing out her dress, as the wedding party followed after them. She watched as Jamie offered his arm to the maid of honour at his side. Her cheeks lit up and a smile stretched across her glossy lips. Charlie was painted with jealousy as she watched the pair skip out of the church.

Nora took her hand and pulled her along after her, following the rest of their family out of the church. She inhaled a deep breath of fresh air once they burst through the front doors. The sun was blazing high overhead and the sky somehow seemed even bluer.

Amid the frantic congratulations, Charlie and Nora stood off to the side of the wedding party. Guests began pouring out of the building, forming a line. One by one, they stopped to congratulate the happy couple.

"You think you'll ever get married?" Nora asked Charlie, catching her off guard.

"I don't know," Charlie shrugged, looking at her cousin. "I mean... I guess I've always thought that I would eventually."

Before they could further their conversation, they were interrupted by their grandparents. Nora did her best to take the heat off of Charlie, but it didn't take long for their grandparents' questions to become accusatory. As soon as her late mother's sister, Aunt Maggie, jumped in on the interrogation, Nora's voice became a distant murmur. Eventually, Nora wandered off altogether. Charlie was overwhelmed with the questions and attention. She did her best to answer them and to seek peace with her family. However, even after the wedding party began to break-up and head to their respective vehicles, Charlie's relatives persisted on grilling her.

"Y'know... we should talk more... later," She told them, forcing a smile. "I'll see you at the reception."

Charlie turned on her heels and sauntered off, making her way to her father's truck. She could see that Bill was waiting for her, occupying his time by conversing with none other than Jamie. As she got closer, she could see that they were passing what looked like a cigarette back and forth. Swallowing hard, Charlie approached the men.

"Good to see you're still in one piece," Her father teased, exhaling a plume of sweet, earthy-smelling smoke.

He passed the hand-rolled cigarette to Jamie. It was then that Charlie realized it was a joint.

"I managed to postpone the feeding frenzy until later," She rolled her eyes. Jamie passed her the joint, his eyebrows raising. Licking her lips, Charlie accepted the joint - or what was left of it. She took a long drag, quickly passing off to her father.

"I'm good," He waved her off, patting the pockets of his blazer. Charlie looked at Jamie, handing him back the roach; meanwhile, Bill pulled out his cell phone. "Y'know, you two look really nice. Mind if... got a photo? For old time's sake."

"Sure," Jamie shrugged. He took one last toke before flicking the smouldering butt to the ground. He and Charlie shared a look before they prepared for their photo.

Charlie inched closer to Jamie, feeling his arm snake around her. She took a step toward him and his hand found her side, gripping tight. With a sigh, Charlie felt herself melting into his chest. She gripped her clutch tightly, fighting the urge to grip onto Jamie's jacket. Charlie looked at her father; he was holding the smartphone at the ready, eyebrows furrowed.

"Alright.... ready... steady.... say cheese!"

"Cheese!" Jamie and Charlie laughed in unison.

After taking a few photos, Bill lowered the device. Jamie's hand was slow to pull away, lingering as he retracted his arm to his side. Charlie looked over at him, smiling softly.

"You two have always been so damn photogenic," Bill laughed, offering his phone to Charlie for inspection. To her surprise, their pose looked almost natural, as if seven years of lost time weren't wedged between them. Jamie peeked over her shoulder, approving of the shot.

Charlie was relieved as Heather's mother called across the parking lot to them, telling them about the photo session scheduled in the park. Jamie made his way to his truck while Charlie and her father climbed into their pick-up. Nora had reunited with her family, opting to head to the hotel to pre-drink rather than watching the wedding party be photographed. Charlie didn't blame her.

The drive to the park was short. It wasn't too far from the church. Mostly everyone in the wedding party was there by the time Bill and Charlie arrived. Charlie kept to herself, lingering in the background while the photographer called for everyone to take their places.

First, the wedding party in its entirety was captured. Then, the photographer asked for bridesmaids and groomsmen separately. Charlie watched as everyone smiled and stood up straight. When it came time for Heather and her father to get their photos taken, Charlie noticed the bridesmaids swarmed around Jamie. She scowled from a distance, digging the toe of her heel into the dirt. Charlie knew there would be no sense in trying to stay sober if she was going to endure women hitting on her ex all night.

After her father and Caleb got their photos taken, Bill returned to his daughter's side. He must have noticed the distasteful look on her face as she stared at Jamie and his fans. As a result, Bill laughed when he joined her.

"What's up, kiddo?"

"Nothing," She sighed, eyes reluctant to look away. Charlie forced a smile. "You got another joint?"

"For later," He winked. "Why? What's... on your mind?"

"It's... nothing," Charlie shrugged, her eyes yet again wandering over to where two bridesmaids were following Jamie. He didn't seem invested in their conversation; however, that didn't deter them.

"You... jealous?" Bill teased.

"No, I'm not... jealous," Charlie retorted, looking to her father. She brushed some of her flaxen hair from her face. "I'm not... it's... I don't..."

Bill snickered as his daughter sputtered and stammered. Her cheeks were rosy with embarrassment, her makeup failing to disguise how flustered she felt.

"Y'know, I've gotten to know Jamie well over the years," He told Charlie. "Through you, through Caleb, through work... and even after all this time, Charlie... he's still got it bad for you, kid."

Charlie's scrunched up face softened. She looked at Jamie quickly before turning her attention back to her father. Though Bill may not have been completely up-to-date on the situation between Charlie and Jamie, he trusted his observational skills. He could see the way they looked at each other; he could see it in the photo he'd taken of them, just how well they fit together.

"How do you... figure?" Charlie asked, her eyebrow cocking.

Both Charlie and Bill looked over at Jamie. Upon stealing a glance at Charlie, Jamie was surprised to find two sets of eyes on him. He smiled sheepishly, looking away quickly after. Instead, he pretended to be interested in the shot of Heather and her maid of honour as the photographer directed them.

"You can just tell," Bill insisted. "The way he looks at you... the way he perks up whenever someone mentions your name... the twinkle in his eyes when he's thinking of you..."

"Dad-" Charlie sighed.

"I've been in love before, sweetheart," He reminded her. "I've... I've been there. I've seen it. I know what it's like and I can see it in Jamie, whenever he looks at you."

Though she'd never discussed love much with her father, Charlie was grateful for his insight. She looked over at Jamie, admiring the way the sun danced through his hair. He was laughing with another groomsman, showing off his dimples for the rest of the world. Charlie wished, more than anything, that she could make Jamie laugh like that yet again. His laughter was like a song she used to love but hadn't heard in ages. It filled her with nostalgia.

"And frankly," Bill continued, capturing her attention. "Y'know... I don't hate the idea of you two together again."

Charlie rolled her eyes, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"I think you two... need each other, in a way," Bill went on. "You need the support of a hard-working man and he needs the love of a kind-hearted woman."

"Is this your blessing?" Charlie snickered.

"Something like that," Her father shrugged, wrapping an arm around his daughter. He pulled Charlie into his side, planting a kiss on the top of her head. "Besides... it would be really nice having you around again, honey. Lord knows I could use your help around the farm."

"I'll... consider it," She smirked, resting her head on her Dad's chest.

They pulled apart and shared a smile.

"Dad! Charlie!"

Caleb waved them over to join him. As per his request, the photographer was setting up for one last shot. Bill took Charlie's hand and led her over to where Caleb was standing. Her brother was all smiles.

"Charlie, why don't you stand in the middle..." The photographer directed. "Bill... Caleb... stand on either side..."

Both men wrapped an arm around the dainty woman in the middle. Charlie softened like butter, feeling the joy radiating from her brother and her father, alike. After several shots had been taken, Caleb wrapped his sister in a bear hug. Her feet skimmed the grass.

"Thank you so much for being here, Charlie," He whispered into her hair.

"It's been a privilege," She returned, giving Caleb a squeeze before pulling away.

"Alright, so... we drinking, or what?" Bill laughed, causing most of the wedding party to crack up. "It ain't official until we're all drunk!"

"You heard the man," Heather laughed from a few feet away. "It's time to drink!"

Charlie followed her brother and father back toward their vehicles. Her heels sunk into the ground, leaving her trailing behind.

"Hey, Charlie..."

She looked over her shoulder, bursting from the seams as Jamie fell into step with her. She smiled at him, tucking some of her hair away behind her ear.

"What's up?"

"Nothing, I just..." Jamie shrugged, his hands finding the pockets of his pants. "Well... I wanted to tell you... you look... gorgeous."

Charlie looked over at him, heart stuttering and cheeks rosy.

"Thanks, Jay," She smiled. "You too."

"I was also... sort of hoping... maybe," He shrugged again, looking over at her with a crooked smile. "You'd save me a dance tonight."

By now, Charlie's cheeks were blazing.

"Yeah, sure..." She nodded.

As they reached the edge of the parking lot, they both stopped. Unsure of what to do, Charlie reached over to brush a bit of lint from off of Jamie's sleeve. She looked away nervously, feigning interest in the cement beneath her.

"You staying at the hotel tonight?"

The question caught Charlie off guard. She lifted her gaze from the ground, nodding.

"I'm pretty sure Nora is on a mission to make sure I get plastered," She explained, causing Jamie to snicker. "So I'm sharing a room with her for the night."

"Cool, well... I guess I'll see you there," Jamie smiled.

"Yeah, definitely," Charlie grinned.

She watched Jamie stroll away, hands still stuffed in his pockets. From the corner of her eye, she noticed the quizzical stares of the bridesmaids. However, Charlie cared little. With a skip in her step, she made her way over to her father's truck. Bill was already inside, waiting with the air conditioning on. Charlie opened the door, finding her father loosening his tie.

"You ready, kid?"

"As ever," Charlie sighed, slamming the door shut behind her.

"Good because this guy..." Bill pointed to himself. "Needs a drink."
♠ ♠ ♠
Ya... I know I said I'd finish this by the end of the year... but I'm thinking maybe... I won't. Perhaps by the end of January, now that I have found a little steam and have started making more progress.

All things in due time!

I think one of the most important (and understated) lessons of life is that... there is no sense in rushing. Rushing leads to sloppy. Rushing leads to premature results. Rushing leads us to a place that is not our dream destination.

I've spent a lot of time RUSHING to figure my life out, to finish stories, to fall in love, to get through school, to find that dream career, to achieve (nearly) instantaneous gratification... and it's literally gotten me NOWHERE fast.

So... here's to taking our time, to being totally present, to allowing the situation to unfold as it will; here's to accepting wherever we are in life so that we may fully align our actions, our thoughts, and our words, with wherever it is we want to be.

May 2018 be the year that we all slow down, take a deep breath, and really savour each step of the process. While reaching your final destination is sweet, there is nothing more fulfilling than enjoying the journey.

- M

Title Credit: Now I Know - July Talk