All The Small Things

"Irene can you just please come?" I asked her.

"But Noa, my make up!"

"I couldn't care less about your make up! I have to be in art class in 3 minutes! Hurry up!" I said, pulling her with me, out of the schoolbathrooms.

"Fine, fine I'm coming."

When I kept walking fast, she sighed. "You know, I am wearing heels. Heels are not fit for speedwalking like you are doing now!"

"Then you should've hurried up. You know I can't miss art."

"I seriously still don't understand what you like about it. The class is terrible. All geeks and goths."

"Please, stop doing that okay? I like the class, I'll keep following the class until I graduate."

Taking a few other turns, I found out the door was closed already.

"Crap. Thanks alot, Irene!"

"What? I didn't do anything."

"Sure you didn't. See you later, probably."

"You should take a chill pill. You've had something on your ass lately and I don't like the fact you're taking it out on me." she said and turned around to walk away.

I sighed and shook my head. Of course I had 'something up my ass' but it wasn't important for her to know. I knocked on the door and then opened it.

"Who do we have here. Miss Walters. I already thought you wouldn't make it. Come in, please."

"Sorry, Mr Williams."

"It's perfectly fine, just take a seat."

I nodded and sat down, walking down the row of tables, finding one chair empty next to what Irene called a 'goth' I sighed and sat down. Mr Darcy was telling us about some project he wanted to do, what involved us drawing something with another person. Just as a test. It sounded like fun but I had seriously no idea who Iwas going to be my partner.

"Let's see.. Miss Walters and Mr Way. You'll be a couple as well.. Now, you all know your partner, I want you to go home and draw anything you like. But it has to be together. Interpret your own thoughts and likings in the drawing, painting or whatever you want to make. As long as you both had a share in it."

It seemed like a fun project but I really hadn't the slightest idea who 'Mr Way' was. I looked around the room but didn't see anyone who I knew the name of. Well, there was John Johnston. He was a 'geek' who helped me out with Biology a few times. He was a nice guy but hated his name. His dad thought it sounded funny. Other than that, it weren't people I'd hang out with. "Who the fuck is Mr Way?!" I said, biting a nail. "Please just call me Gerard, okay? And no, I don't want to work with you either but I guess we have to." I took a glance to my left, to the guy I was sitting next to.

"Oh so you're Mr Way."

"Gerard."

"Gerard. I'm Noa."

"Sure. Who's house are we going to?"

"Yours, if thats okay. I don't want to.."

"Fine by me. Meet me at my place at 7 tonight is that okay with you?"

I opened my mouth to say something but I was a little pissed at the attitude he was giving me.

"Fine. Where do you live?"

He scribbled his address on a little piece of paper and practically threw it on my desk. I looked at the address and saw it was quite a few blocks away from me.

"Great." I mumbled to myself, putting the paper in my pocket. I waited for the bell to ring and walked out of the room as fast as I could. Walking home, I already dreaded the evening. This Gerard guy was a total jerk when I didn't do anything to him. I hated people who judged so soon.

Eating at my grandma's house, I made my way to Gerard's house at half past 6. At least he couldn't say anything about me being too late. Noa vs Gerard; 1-0. I did find out I was 10 minutes early so I decided to walk around their block one more time and then I rang the doorbell. No one opened and I waited a while before I rang the bell again. After ringing the doorbell 4 times, I finally heard some movement. The door was opened and Gerard stood in the doorframe.

"Oh, it's you. Come in."

"Gee, thanks."

I stepped in and took in my surroundings. It was a nice house, though it was pretty dark.

"So what do you want to do?" he asked, looking around the room, avoiding eye contact.

"Drawing. You?"

"Drawing. What do you want to draw?"

"I don't know. I can't set my mind on anything. If I put a pencil to paper, it just comes out."

He nodded in understandment.

"So how about you draw something first and then I'll add something? Or the other way around?"

This time I was a little taken by surprise because he actually sounded nice.

"I don't care. You pick."

"Ooookay. You go first."

I nodded, pulled my jacket off, leaving me in my tshirt.

"Where do we sit?"

"Now you pick."

"Kitchen."

He nodded his head in agreement and turned around heading for, what I thought would be, the kitchen. I followed him and looked around.

"You can take a seat. Want something to drink?"

"Do you have coffee?"

"I'll make it, you can draw if you want to."

I nodded and opened my sketchbook. I heard him fiddling with all the stuff he needed but blocked it all out. I started drawing and after a half an hour I had about half of the drawing on the paper. I put down my pencil and moved my wrists a bit.

"You done already?" Gerard asked, sipping his coffee.

"No, my wrist started to ache a bit.. Oh, crap. I totally forgot my coffee." I said, while searching for a mug.

"I didn't make you any."

I looked up at him.

"When I was in the process of making it, I saw you were already lost in the world of drawing, so to speak. I knew your coffee was gonna get cold so I placed everything in the machine. Just didn't turn it on."

I looked at him with my mouth open a little.

"How did you know I wasn't gonna drink my coffee?"

"Because you block everything out when you draw. I've seen you do that millions of times in class."

"How do you know what I'm doing class?" He sighed. "I observe."

I snorted. "Sure."

He smiled and took another sip of his coffee. "Can I see the drawing?" I doubted.

"Shit. I kind of forgot that you were gonna be drawing in this as well.." I said looking at the picture.

"Is it too personal?"

"Well, it's personal alright." I said and then closed my eyes. "Fuck it." I said and quickly placed the book in Gerard's hands. He looked at it and his face saddened.

"Why were you such a jerk when Mr Darcy partnered us up?" I asked him, out of the blue.

He stared me in the eyes and I quickly looked away.

"Well.. I was a bit ticked off at some stuff I won't bore you with. And I thought you'd hate to be partners with me. So I thought I could make it easy for you by acting like I didn't like you."

I shook my head and made a face.

"Why would I hate being partners with you? I don't even know you. Besides, they could've partnered me up with the biggest jerk in school and I still wouldn't mind. You're a bit of an ass."

He looked at me and then laughed. A smile I instantly took a liking to.

"Wow, no one has ever been so bold."

"Well, you know.. You shouldn't believe what people say about somebody so I tend not to. So no, I didn't know who you were and yes, I wanted to work with you when I first learned who you were. But you were being so stupid I didn't really want to work with you anymore. Do you like the drawing or do you want to do something else?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Erm.. no I like it. A broken home, huh?" I nodded, accepting my sketchbook from Gerard. I looked at the drawing of a house, torn up and broken. "It's where my situation's at at the moment. My parents are filing for divorce."

He was about to take a sip from his coffee but lowered his mug when he heard me say the words I hated to say. Yet they fell out like that.

"I'm sorry. Just like that or..?"

I bit my lip. "No. I was an accident but my grandparents wanted my mom and dad to get married. It was like, back in the day you know? So they did love each other at first but when they were forced into the marriage, the love kind of went away. They dealt with each other but that was it. And then last week my dad came home, sat at the kitchentable and he just.. got it out there in the middle of dinner. I felt nausious and almost threw up but I saw it coming. It's probably for the best but I don't like it at all. I mean.. it's not everyday that you hear your parents are gonna get divorced. Like.. how am I gonna spend christmas now? Or thanksgiving? And my birthday? It's gonna be so screwed." I shook my head and then rested my head in my hands. "I've been thinking about going to my grandmothers house for a while because she's my everything I have at the moment.. But I don't want her to take care of me. She's got her own life. So I guess I'll keep living with my mom..?"

Gerard gave me a sympathetic look, which I liked. At least he wasn't an asshole as I thought.

"I know this is a screwed situation but things will get better in the end. The first year or 2 are gonna be hard but then you'll find some sort of balance between them that will work out. And if you say that there was no love anymore, then.. Maybe the mood in your house will be alot better, right?"

I swallowed away the lump in my throat but there were a few tears that escaped my eyes.

"Look, how about we forget the drawing and just watch a movie?" I nodded.

"I'd like that."

He smiled, took my hand and we sat down in the livingroom, where we watched a nice horror movie.

"Shit, I better get home before my mom gets worried." I said, when the movie was done and I saw it was already half past midnight.

"I'll walk you."

"No, it's fine, it's a long walk I can go by myself."

"How long is long?"

"About 20 minutes."

"Shit, that's kind of long. Well, I'll drive you."

"You don't have to."

"I know. But I want to. And there's the difference. Got your things?" I nodded and smiled at him gratefully.

On the way home I learned he was 19, had a huge love for Iron Maiden and he had a younger brother, Mikey. He loved everything that had to do with death because he saw a beauty and release in it. What made me think aboutdeath in another way. When we arrived at my place, Gerard turned off the engine.

"So, I want to apologize for being an ass in Artclass today."

I smiled and shook my head. "You've made up for that, tenfold. You're a real nice guy."

I saw him blushing a bit, what made me adore him. "So how about I see you tomorrow, Artclass?" I asked and Gerard nodded.

"Sure. Can I erm.."

"Hm?"

"Remember how I said that I observe?" he asked and I nodded.

"Well, I don't just observe. I observe you. For about 2 years now. I see you sitting in artclass and you are so.. interesting to look at. You have these things that you do. If you don't like something you've drawn, you scrunch up your nose and shake your head. Then you mumble to yourself. Whenever you're listening to Mr. Darcy and you're not interested anymore, you tap your pencil on the table and move your right foot. And when you look outside, it seems like you want to escape life because it's all gonna end anyway. When I see the light reflecting in your eyes it's like.. Like I see who you actually are and not the you who you pretend to be. You have me completely fixed on you and I can't stop staring. You're... You're just.. You're amazing."

I looked at him in shock.

"I.. I.. How.. can I respond to that. That was.. wow. I never thought anyone would notice all that. I really do those things?"

"Yeah, you do. Trust me. I've seen it on repeat." I bit my lip and then smiled.

"Thanks for saying all that. I guess, I'm gonna go inside now and.. see you at Art tomorrow. Thanks for the ride.."

He smiled but I saw his eyes were sad. I got out of the car, wanted to walk towards the door but my legs and heart took me another way. I walked to his side of the car, while he rolled down his window.

"Forgot something?" he asked, with his eyebrow furrowed.

I looked in his hazel eyes and smiled. "Yeah, I did."

I bent forward and kissed him gently on his lips.

"See you tomorrow." I said and walked away.

I walked to the door and when I wanted to close it, I caught a glimpse of Gerard's smiling face what made me burt out with a smile. I walked upstairs and went to bed straightaway. He actually was a nice guy, who would've thought? Something told me that my life wasn't gonna be so hard now I met Gerard. Something told me, that everything was gonna be fine. Something told me, that he was gonna make it all okay.

Something told me, Gerard Way was all I'd ever need.