Diary Of Insanity

~♦~ Jennifer’s Point Of View ~♦~

About half an hour later and I had found myself at a Walgreen 24hr drug store on Beach boulevard. Of course I’d ran about a bit before actually going there since I didn’t want Matt to find me. I didn’t really want to talk to anyone right now.

I walked into the store and up to the counter. I asked the lady behind the counter for some Tylenol. I think she must have either thought I was in serious pain or I had a gun or something because she took one look at me then hurried off to get me some meds.

As soon as she got me the stuff I’d asked for I handed her the money, walked out of the store and wandered off down the street with my painkillers in hand.

I found myself sitting in the middle of central park. I was sitting next to a pond which had a hell of a lot of ducks in it. The tub of painkillers were sitting next to me, unopened. I was debating with myself on whether or not I was going to take them.

I could hear voices shouting in the far distance and if I listened closely I could tell they were shouting my name. But I didn’t care, I didn’t want to be found.

I looked down at the plastic tub and sighed before picking it up and opening it before shoving two into my mouth and swallowing. I didn’t even realise the voice was so much closer now.

I bit my lip before pouring a handful of pills out of the tub and pushing them all into my mouth. I was about to swallow when the bottle was wrenched from my hands and the familiar voice of Zacky was ordering me to spit them out. I got such a fright that that’s exactly what I did.

“Jen are you stupid!? Do you know how many people die from overdosing on that stuff?” he asked as he dropped the bottle onto the grass next to us and pulled me into a tight hug.

“What are you doing here Zack?” I asked in a monotone voice as I pulled away from him.

“What do you think I’m going here, I came because you ran out the house shouting for something your addicted to and then no one could find you anywhere.” he explained. “I was worried Jen.”

“You shouldn’t have been, I can take care of myself.” I said as I looked down at the ground.

“What’s going on with you, you’ve been acting strange with me for the past couple of weeks?” he asked as he moved from kneeling next to me to sitting next to me.

“Nothing.”

“It can’t be nothing if you kiss someone then try to ignore for the next month. Did I do something?” he asked and I laughed inwardly.

“How’s Chloe?” I asked as I looked up at him. He looked quite confused.

“I dunno, I haven’t spoken to her ever since that night she was here.” I sighed. “Why are you asking about her?”

“Do you like her?” I asked, no point in trying to cover it up. “I saw her kiss you that night.” his eyes went wide as though he’d finally found the last piece of a puzzle.

“No Jen I don’t like her. Well I do like her, just not like her, like her. Like that.” he stopped after he realised how confusing that had all sounded. “What I mean is, nothing was going on, she asked me to take care of you for her after I thanked her from coming to help you.”

“Why would she do that?” I asked, trying to put everything together.

“Because.” he took a deep breath before saying the next part very quickly. “Because she knew I liked you.” this nearly made me choke.

“You what?” I asked. Okay, not the best reply when the guy you have a crush on tell you that he likes you, but I was in shock and caught off guard.

“I like you Jen. In the way that’s gonna make Matt wanna kill me when he finds out.” this made me smile because I knew there was a 99.9% chance it was the truth.

“You wanna know a secret?” I asked and he nodded his head slowly as though he were afraid of what was to come. I leaned in and whispered in his ear. “I like you to.” I pulled away from him and smiled like a school girl would if she were in this situation.

“That’s good.” he nodded. “That means you won’t kick my ass for doing this.” he smirked before moving in and kissing me. I felt like all of my dreams were coming true all at the one time, as though my life may just have a chance at meaning something other than a rule book of what not to do. After what seemed like decades we pulled away.

“You really think I could kick your ass? I mean that’s like…” I started with a massive smile and a slight giggle before he cut me off.

“Jenny, you’re weird.” he smirked and we kissed again.

We sat there in front of the pond for about an hour before we realised we should probably go tell the guys that I was found and safe. We stood up, Zack’s arm tightly around me in a protective way.

“Jen, you have to promise me something..” he started as he looked down at me, his facial expression completely serious so I nodded my head for him to continue. “You have to promise me you’ll try, I know it’s gonna be difficult but you have to give them up.” he said and I nodded again.

“I’ll try, it’s just so difficult. It’s somewhere to turn when things are to much for me to handle. The past two years of my life have been driven by them, it’s as though I can’t let go. But I’ll try.” I smiled and he nodded his head, happy about the answer I’d given.

“Come on, let’s get you home and tell Matt we’re together so he can start killing me.” he laughed as he guided me away from the pond and in a direction I’m sure was the way home. Put it this way, it was dark, I hadn’t been here much and I couldn’t really see well. I didn’t know where he was taking me.

“Oh wait.” I said as I turned around and ran back to the bit I’d been sitting at. I kneeled down on the ground and picked up the tub of Tylenol and opened it before picking up all of the pills I’d spit out and putting them back into the bottle. Then I ran back to Zacky.

“Kids come here.” I noted as he gave me a confused look. He nodded then took the bottle off of me, jut in case I guess. And we made our way out of the park and back towards the house.