Angels With Dirty Faces
IX
She winced as the nurse, removed the bandages, winding them around her gloved hand as she went, the fresh air made her skin tingle, Kevin watched, one hand in hers the other covering his mouth, he watched his stomach turning as the bandages slipped away revealing, angry red wounds, the staples holding he surgical wounds together just barely in the skin, he chewed his lip glancing at Scarlett’s face trying to gage a reaction.
She stared emotionless and gripped Kevin’s thumb like a child,
“We will need to take you to xray at some point today just to check everything is settling properly, we think your pelvis has virtually healed and now the stitches are gone your head looks a million times better! I am just a little bit concerned about” she paused
Kevins ears pricked up
“About what?”
The nurse looked at him reassuringly
“I’m sure it’s nothing but I’m just going to speak to the doctor”
Scarlett smiled uncertainly, she lay back down slowly, pulling the blankets up to her chin, she throbbed,
“You alright love?”
Kev asked stroking her hand, she nodded closing her eyes, ignoring the nausea and dizziness that crashed through her.
--
“Look Dolly if you don’t want to do this we’ll understand, you’ve been through a lot with him”
George stated
“And without” Bayleaf sneered “I don’t understand how someone would walk away from their pregnant girlfriend and miss the entire thing because of a poxy row!”
“That’s just it Bayleaf it was a poxy row!” Scarlett looked at him with pleading eyes “She needs to know her dad, she has every bloody right to know him as well! Regardless of my feelings on him” she began to well up, her voice becoming thick George placed an arm over her shoulder “The pregnancy and the bloody labour was easy but this bit I can’t do alone, the poor little mite hasn’t even got a name yet! I need Kevin!”
She swallowed the words hard, after everything she had been through the past year she never thought she’s want him let alone need him, she bought everything for the baby, she gave birth with just the midwife at her side and she had done every dirty nappy and every midnight feed alone, but now she was starting to crumble, as sleep deprivation had set in she found herself lonely and on edge, barely leaving the flat unless she had need to, but as the realisation set in that she hadn’t even provided her daughter with a name she sunk lower. She took a deep breath swallowing the tears, George placed a hand on her shoulder,
“go on doll, when you’re ready”
“And you’re okay watching her? She’s not due a feed for a few hours but if she wakes up I’ll-“
“Stay in there until you’ve sorted things, I’ve got a sprout of my own you know!”
She smiled
“I’ve never left her with anyone before”
“You’ll be in the next room she’ll be fine”
She walked in to the sleeping quarters, she moved slowly through the dark, keeping her steps slow and quiet, she crouched next to his bed, fixing her eyes on him, he was almost angelic, she reached up and switched the lamp on, his face twitched,
“Kevin?” she nudged him gently, he groaned, rolling her eyes she nudged him again “We need to talk”
He woke up, his head swimming and eyes blurred, he smiled reaching a hand out, brushing his finger tips along her jaw, She pulled her face away, irritation bubbling in her stomach,
“I can’t believe you’re here”
“Me neither!” She sighed standing back to her feet, “Are we going to talk about this or not?”
He sat up, stretching himself out,
“Can I have a cuppa first? And a smoke?”
“No Kev and do you know why?” she sat on the foot of the bed locking eyes with him “I’ve been alone for the past 14 months, well I can’t say I’ve been alone exactly, our daughter has kept me company”
His eyes widened
“You’ve had the baby then?”
“Yeah two months ago, you’d know that had you not been too…busy? Shall we say?”
“I’ve been working!” He snapped “I’ve spent every waking hour trying to keep myself busy, so I wasn’t haunted by you! So that I didn’t end up driving myself up the bloody wall with panic!”
“What have you had to panic about Kevin? What lacy drawers Marian’s wearing?”
She cocked her head folding her arms, he froze,
“Who told you?”
She stood up,
“Is that what it takes to get a response? Bring your bloody tart in to things?” her heart began to pound as she felt her blood run warm, she clenched her fists, “I had your child Kevin, by my bloody self, because you were too busy drinking and bed hoping to care! You know where I live Kevin! You could have come over, you could have made some bloody effort!”
He stood from the bed, charging towards her grabbing her by the arms, she pushed against him,
“Who told you?!”
He began to shout,
“It doesn’t matter!” she shouted back her voice breaking, she shoved him backwards, “It doesn’t matter, none of this matters, you’ve just proved that! You Kevin Medhurst are just like your father!”
She spat walking away, she walked back in to the mess room, picking up the changing bag and car seat,
“Dolly? Everything alright?”
George asked
“Yeah, smashing” she said her voice still quivering “Thanks for having her, I’ll see you about”
She strapped the car seat in to the back, touching her daughters face,
“Just me and you baby, we’ll be okay”
She climbed in to the front locking her door, she put her head in her hands and broke, tears flowing thick and fast she heaved sob after heavy sob, unable to take consolation even in the fact that she tried.
He dashed past the mess room, George called after him,
“Here, Kev are you taking the piss?!”
He demanded as he ran past
“Leave it out George”
He called back, he ran in to the car park, gleaming in the corner was Scarlett’s car, relief swept his body, he rushed towards it, knocking frantically on the window, she looked up and wound down her window,
“what?”
Lost for words he noticed the car seat in the back,
“Can I see her?”
He asked quietly,
“Get in”
--
“Mummy”
The little voice woke her, she glanced to the seat next to her,
“Hello roo” She smiled weakly, her head pounding with pain, she held her hand out taking her daughters “Have you been good?” The child nodded “Mummy be home soon; do you want to go for a walk?”
Kevin smiled moving Ruby from his lap and passing Scarlett her dressing gown. They moved slowly through the hospital grounds, her head spinning,
“Are you sure you’re up for this Scar? You don’t look well”
She stopped and looked at Kevin, her eyes glazed pain smashing through her insides, she made a desperate grab for her husband as her legs buckled beneath her, she crashed to the floor, her daughters cries fading a she slipped in to a haze.
She stared emotionless and gripped Kevin’s thumb like a child,
“We will need to take you to xray at some point today just to check everything is settling properly, we think your pelvis has virtually healed and now the stitches are gone your head looks a million times better! I am just a little bit concerned about” she paused
Kevins ears pricked up
“About what?”
The nurse looked at him reassuringly
“I’m sure it’s nothing but I’m just going to speak to the doctor”
Scarlett smiled uncertainly, she lay back down slowly, pulling the blankets up to her chin, she throbbed,
“You alright love?”
Kev asked stroking her hand, she nodded closing her eyes, ignoring the nausea and dizziness that crashed through her.
--
“Look Dolly if you don’t want to do this we’ll understand, you’ve been through a lot with him”
George stated
“And without” Bayleaf sneered “I don’t understand how someone would walk away from their pregnant girlfriend and miss the entire thing because of a poxy row!”
“That’s just it Bayleaf it was a poxy row!” Scarlett looked at him with pleading eyes “She needs to know her dad, she has every bloody right to know him as well! Regardless of my feelings on him” she began to well up, her voice becoming thick George placed an arm over her shoulder “The pregnancy and the bloody labour was easy but this bit I can’t do alone, the poor little mite hasn’t even got a name yet! I need Kevin!”
She swallowed the words hard, after everything she had been through the past year she never thought she’s want him let alone need him, she bought everything for the baby, she gave birth with just the midwife at her side and she had done every dirty nappy and every midnight feed alone, but now she was starting to crumble, as sleep deprivation had set in she found herself lonely and on edge, barely leaving the flat unless she had need to, but as the realisation set in that she hadn’t even provided her daughter with a name she sunk lower. She took a deep breath swallowing the tears, George placed a hand on her shoulder,
“go on doll, when you’re ready”
“And you’re okay watching her? She’s not due a feed for a few hours but if she wakes up I’ll-“
“Stay in there until you’ve sorted things, I’ve got a sprout of my own you know!”
She smiled
“I’ve never left her with anyone before”
“You’ll be in the next room she’ll be fine”
She walked in to the sleeping quarters, she moved slowly through the dark, keeping her steps slow and quiet, she crouched next to his bed, fixing her eyes on him, he was almost angelic, she reached up and switched the lamp on, his face twitched,
“Kevin?” she nudged him gently, he groaned, rolling her eyes she nudged him again “We need to talk”
He woke up, his head swimming and eyes blurred, he smiled reaching a hand out, brushing his finger tips along her jaw, She pulled her face away, irritation bubbling in her stomach,
“I can’t believe you’re here”
“Me neither!” She sighed standing back to her feet, “Are we going to talk about this or not?”
He sat up, stretching himself out,
“Can I have a cuppa first? And a smoke?”
“No Kev and do you know why?” she sat on the foot of the bed locking eyes with him “I’ve been alone for the past 14 months, well I can’t say I’ve been alone exactly, our daughter has kept me company”
His eyes widened
“You’ve had the baby then?”
“Yeah two months ago, you’d know that had you not been too…busy? Shall we say?”
“I’ve been working!” He snapped “I’ve spent every waking hour trying to keep myself busy, so I wasn’t haunted by you! So that I didn’t end up driving myself up the bloody wall with panic!”
“What have you had to panic about Kevin? What lacy drawers Marian’s wearing?”
She cocked her head folding her arms, he froze,
“Who told you?”
She stood up,
“Is that what it takes to get a response? Bring your bloody tart in to things?” her heart began to pound as she felt her blood run warm, she clenched her fists, “I had your child Kevin, by my bloody self, because you were too busy drinking and bed hoping to care! You know where I live Kevin! You could have come over, you could have made some bloody effort!”
He stood from the bed, charging towards her grabbing her by the arms, she pushed against him,
“Who told you?!”
He began to shout,
“It doesn’t matter!” she shouted back her voice breaking, she shoved him backwards, “It doesn’t matter, none of this matters, you’ve just proved that! You Kevin Medhurst are just like your father!”
She spat walking away, she walked back in to the mess room, picking up the changing bag and car seat,
“Dolly? Everything alright?”
George asked
“Yeah, smashing” she said her voice still quivering “Thanks for having her, I’ll see you about”
She strapped the car seat in to the back, touching her daughters face,
“Just me and you baby, we’ll be okay”
She climbed in to the front locking her door, she put her head in her hands and broke, tears flowing thick and fast she heaved sob after heavy sob, unable to take consolation even in the fact that she tried.
He dashed past the mess room, George called after him,
“Here, Kev are you taking the piss?!”
He demanded as he ran past
“Leave it out George”
He called back, he ran in to the car park, gleaming in the corner was Scarlett’s car, relief swept his body, he rushed towards it, knocking frantically on the window, she looked up and wound down her window,
“what?”
Lost for words he noticed the car seat in the back,
“Can I see her?”
He asked quietly,
“Get in”
--
“Mummy”
The little voice woke her, she glanced to the seat next to her,
“Hello roo” She smiled weakly, her head pounding with pain, she held her hand out taking her daughters “Have you been good?” The child nodded “Mummy be home soon; do you want to go for a walk?”
Kevin smiled moving Ruby from his lap and passing Scarlett her dressing gown. They moved slowly through the hospital grounds, her head spinning,
“Are you sure you’re up for this Scar? You don’t look well”
She stopped and looked at Kevin, her eyes glazed pain smashing through her insides, she made a desperate grab for her husband as her legs buckled beneath her, she crashed to the floor, her daughters cries fading a she slipped in to a haze.