Cult 7

Chapter 1

“Tell me everything you are experiencing Joseph. All the sights, sounds, smells, and even how your surroundings make you feel. Don’t leave out any details.”

“It’s pouring rain. I’ve always loved the rain. The sound of it hitting the ground, the smell of it, even the feeling of it hitting my face as I look up towards the sky. Other than the sound of the rain, I can’t hear anything else. No moon or stars, just a pitch black sky.

I’m all alone on a small street. All the buildings around me are just as dark as the sky. There’s no evidence of any people. All there is a quiet eerie emptiness that’s making me feel uneasy,” I took a deep breath to calm my uneasiness.

“Is everything okay Joseph,” just hearing Dr. Corrin’s soothing voice was able to calm me down. “We can stop if we need to.”

“No, let’s keep going. I can do this.”

“Alright. I want you to focus on the how your dream ends.”

I took another deep breath and continued on, “Now I’m a larger street. It’s still raining and I’m still the only person around. However, in from of me is a large building. All the lights are on and it’s so bright that it covers most of my surroundings. The top of the building pierces the sky and I can’t see the top. All the sudden, a massive bright light shoots out of the clouds towards the ground. It engulfs everything.”

I slowly opened my eyes and sat up from the couch.

“Is that everything,” Dr. Corrin placed her notepad down on the table next to her.

“That’s all I can remember from my dream,” I ran my fingers through my hair and let out a little sigh. “As long as I can remember I’ve been having this dream on almost a nightly basis. It ends the same, but I know there’s more to it.”

“You’ve been seeing me for three months now Joseph and all you can talk about is this dream. You rarely talk about your family, your job, or your love life. Why do you think you’re so focused on this dream?”

“Part of me thinks this isn’t a dream.”

“According to what you’ve told me, you’ve never lived in a city or even visited one. There’s no evidence that this is a repressed memory. What makes you think this is more than a dream?”

“It’s just so vivid. Every detail seems so real. It’s like I’m really there.”

“Can I be honest with you Joseph?” she stood up and took a seat next to me. “Part of me believes everything your saying. However I think there’s more to it. I’ve been working on helping people recover repressed memories and focus on the trauma that that comes with them. I think you are a perfect candidate for my study. There is a catch though. The only way I can make you part of the study is if you come to the university I work for.”

“Isn’t that in Axiom? That’s a three day drive. There’s no way I can go to and from there.”

“I have another idea. I’m willing to help you relocate. I’ll pay for your moving expenses and can even get you a job at the university. I know how much you love books. It just so happens our librarian is in need of an assistant. It doesn’t pay much, but I know Mr. Avari would appreciate the help,”

“You’d really do all that for me?”

“Of course. We would both benefit from it. Besides I think a change of scenery would be good for you. I have to head back tomorrow and I could have all the preparations made in a month. I want to help you I really do. Please think it over.”

After our session ended, I sat at the train station for a while and thought things over. I’ve never been anywhere other than my hometown. Everything I knew was here. Could I really just leave and start over? I was anxious and excited all at the same time.

I took a long drag off of my cigarette and thought things over. I hate change, but there’s nothing keeping me back. My job sucks and I don’t have a girlfriend or family here, being an orphan has some upsides I guess.

“I’ll do it.”

A month had passed and Dr. Corrin had yet to get back to me. It wasn’t unusual, it just seemed odd that she gave me such a proposition and then not keep in contact with me. I tried my hardest not to let it affect me. She had helped me with my anxiety and taught me techniques to ease my mind.

For as long as I can remember, my anxiety was almost debilitating. I couldn’t keep a job, couldn’t stay in a relationship and never really had any friends. I wish I could describe what exactly went on through my head. The best I could come up with is that I thought people wouldn’t want anything to with me, but I knew for a fact all of that wasn’t true. No matter how hard I tried to make myself realize that it was all in my head, I always convinced myself that it was all true.

Dr. Corrin was the only person I felt genuinely cared about me and wanted me to succeed. She was the one hope I had of living somewhat of a normal life. That’s why I decided to move and be part of her study. If she could fix me, then I knew my life would be better.

Just when whatever hope I had left was started to fade, I received a text message from her. It read, “Great news! I was able to get you a nice apartment near campus and I was able to get you that job. My colleagues who are assisting in the study are very excited to meet you. I know how you feel about meeting new people, but they really want to help you out. I promise Joseph, your life is going to change for the better. You can come to Axiom at any time. Don’t rush things. I’ll send you an email with all the info you’ll need. Just let me know and I’ll buy you a train ticket and have your things moved to your new place.

P.S. I owe you big time for this.”

Something about the way she wrote things or said things that always put my mind at ease. She really understood me. It was like talking to a lifelong friend.

I replied, “I’ll give my two weeks notice at my job and leave the day after my last day. Thank you for everything. I can’t wait to get things started.”

I was actually pretty happy to quit my job. I was a stock person at a warehouse. It was back breaking work, but I didn’t have to interact with that many people. That was the only plus to it. I didn’t get paid that well for the hard labor and my boss was a huge asshole. I gave him my two weeks notice, but he informed me that he was going to fire me anyways. Apparently I was too slow at my job.

Surprisingly enough I hugged him when he fired me. It was completely out of character for me, but I was just too happy to say goodbye to another crappy job that I was unhappy about. Working in the university library was something I was looking forward to. I loved to read, always have. The world inside those books is so much more interesting that the real world.

That night I sat in my small one bedroom apartment. I had lived here since I turned eighteen. I never really had a place to call home. Even though I lived here for five years, this place felt strange to me. I wondered if that’s how my new place was going to feel like.

Things were going to change and for the first time, I wasn’t scared.