Angels

*****
(Teegan's POV)

Two weeks had seem to come and go when I finally found myself back at the parenting clinic, only this time with Zacky right beside me. He sat in the seat next to mine but made sure to not say a thing as we waited for my name to be called out. I felt bad that it had to be this way, but I just wasn't happy about the whole situation to begin with. I was scared out of my mind fidgeting with my phone in my lap as I tried to think about other things to distract myself. I sent a text to Val, telling her that Zack had came with me today to find out more about the baby and maybe even reveal its gender. Even though I wasn't still a hundred percent sure that I was even going to be keeping it, the fact that it could be Chester's is the only thing that kept me going along with. "Um, Teegan?" Zacky said suddenly, tapping me on the shoulder, breaking me away from my thoughts. "What?" I snapped, seeing him flinch slightly. "They're ready for us to go back there." He stated simply, motioning over to where the nurse stood in the doorway of the back office. I stood up slowly before walking over towards her carefully with Zacky following right behind. We sat down in a small waiting room were she took my vitals and blood pressure. ”The doctor will be with you two shortly." She announced as she left, leaving us alone. I tried to look up at the ceiling or the walls, anything I could think of so I wouldn't have to make eye contact with him but nothing seemed to work. I groaned loudly, putting my head in my hands.

Zacky scoffed, shaking his head. "If you don't even want to talk or look at me, then why am I here? Why did you even ask me to come with you?" His voice sounded more hurt than annoyed which made me finally look over at him. "Because I think you have a right to be here, Zacky. Whether I'm happy about it or not, there is a chance that this is your baby. And since Chester can't be here, I have to settle for you." I saw a hint of heartbreak flash across his face as I realized how bad what I had said sounded. "Fuck. I didn't mean it like that. Look, I'm just scared okay? I'm absolutely terrified about this. Everyone is expecting this to be Chester's baby and in reality, what's going to happen when it comes out and it starts to have your features, Zack? The green eyes, dark hair, chubby cheeks? It will make everyone suspicious and probably hurt them because I lied. Their all expecting to see the creation of their dead best friend and his wife when truth is, it's going to be her best friend's baby, someone they probably knew all along that I was going to end up with one way or another." When I finally had shut up, I realized I had only made things worse than before when I saw the tears in his eyes. Instead of saying anything, I simply took his hand and placed it on my stomach. He jerked it away when he felt a slight movement.

I chuckled under my breath, looking away. "Yeah it's been doing that lately." His eyes were wide as he put his hand back on there, the movement continuing. He wiped away the stray tears that lingered on his cheeks as he began to talk softly. "Tee, I don't think you understand how much this really does mean to me. I know, I'm not Chester and this was supposed to only happen with him, but I still care about you. I love you, I want to be closer to you. Especially when this baby is born. Whether it is mine or not, I want to be there. Please, Teegan. Will you just give me a chance?" I bit down on my lip nervously. I really didn't want to let Zacky in, but my heart said otherwise. I fought back the tears as I started to think about Chester and how he should be the one here seeing the baby and finding out its gender, not Zack. But before I could answer him, the door had swung open, revealing the doctor. She set up her machine and began everything that needed to be done. I felt like throwing up at any moment as the screen showed that there was indeed a person in there. "Can you tell what it is yet?" Zacky spoke up curiously as he kept his eyes glued on the monitor. The doctor moved around some, trying to get a good view. Finally she kept it positioned at a good angle and smiled up at the both of us. "Well Mrs. Bennington, I'd say your having a baby boy."

"Do you ever think what it would be like if we hadn't of gotten together in the end?" I asked Chester curiously as we walked down a long pathway to a small duck pond. We were in Florida on a day off after playing two sold out shows the nights before and Chester wanted to take me out on a "date" to celebrate our first year of marriage. He shrugged his shoulders as we sat down on a small park bench, intertwining his fingers with mine. "To be honest with you baby, no, I don't. I don't like to think about it because it would hurt. I was in a really dark place right before I met you and if it wasn't for your friends insisting that I meet you that day in Texas when I did, I probably would have been dead that same night. I had just started to recover from a long break up and then I had found out that the girl, my ex, ended up dying a few nights before from a drug overdose. So needless to say I was devastated. But then I met you and everything changed. I wasn't sad, or depressed, or even thinking about suicide. Sure I was still in mourning but after talking with you, it was like I had just forgotten everything. Like my memory was wiped clean of all the bad. That's why I insisted on keeping in contact with you, because I knew if I didn't, I'd surely hate myself and just lose it completely. I know I haven't really told you all this before, but it's because of you, because of you and the love you have for me, that had saved me from myself. And I will always love you for that Teegan."

(Zacky's POV)

When the doctor said she was having a boy, my heart instantly fell out of my chest. I was happy and terrified to know what he was going to look like, what he was going to be named. Tears had poured out of both of our eyes as I reached out and held onto Teegan's hand tightly. I knew she was hurting because I know this is what her and Chester had always wanted, but I also wanted her to know that I was there for her and that she wasn't alone through this regardless of who the father was. Of course I wanted it to be mine, but I knew either way as long as I remained in their lives it wouldn't matter whose it was biologically. She printed out a couple pictures of the sonogram before placing them in an envelope and handing them over to me. "So have you two thought of any names for this little guy yet?" I swallowed hard, looking over at Teegan nervously. She wiped away a tear before sniffling. "I want to name him after his father, so I was thinking either Chester or maybe Zack, because I really love that name." I almost choked on my own tongue when I heard her say that. The doctor just smiled as she finished up with Teegan's examination. It took about a whole hour and a half before everything was finally done with.

She had an appointment to come back in another three weeks for a followup and was told to come back whenever something felt wrong or didn't seem right to her. She congratulated the both of us as we headed out, making me feel a slight knot catch in my chest when she had called me "Dad". Teegan stayed silent the entire way back to the car, only finally speaking to me when we started to drive back to her house. "So, I guess this is the part where I let you move in now, right?" She said with a slight huff. I looked over at her when we stopped at a red light, putting my hand to her face. "I told you, this is whatever you want. If you want me to stay and help you, I will. If you want to come over, you can. If you want to be left completely alone, fine. I want you to do whatever you want, Teegan. I'm trying to be fair here, so just tell me, what is it that you want to do?" She stared down at the floor, keeping her eyes from meeting mine. I could tell she was more than likely crying, which made me hurt even more. "I-I don't know what I want to do, Zacky. I want to let you in but I don't want it to be a relationship. I don't want you replacing Chester." I took in a deep breath before finally pulling over to the side of the road. I cupped her face in my hands, making her look up at me. "I will never, ever, replace him, Teegan. That's a promise. I'm nothing like him, but I promise you that whatever you choose, I'll still love you and I will still be there for you and your son." She stared deep into my eyes, the memories flashing suddenly between the both of us.

I leaned in and kissed her, our lips finally meeting again for what felt like forever. She didn't fight back this time and instead kissed me back. "I love you, Zacky. I want you to be there for his birth, I want you to be there to sign his birth certificate. I want you in his life, whether you are the father or not. It's what Chester would want, I know it."