Angels

*****
(Teegan's POV)

It was a new year already before I knew it. I was now a full six months pregnant with my son, Chester James, my belly growing bigger and bigger every day. I named him after his dad and Jimmy of course. It was the right and honorable thing to do. No one knew what I was having or what the name was besides Zacky and Val. Everyone else was going to find out at my baby shower Val was putting together for me in a couple of months. Zacky had practically moved in on my couch again a few weeks after we had went to the doctor back in November. And while I tried to keep my distance from him, most nights I found myself laying down there right beside him, letting him hold me and keep his hands on my stomach. We weren't in a relationship, but everyone seemed to think so and they also seemed perfectly fine with it too. He took me to all my appointments, made me food whenever I was hungry, handled all my scheduled meetings, helped me buy baby stuff and put his room together, he basically did everything a father was supposed to do really. I talked on the phone to Val for a good three hours the other day about the whole situation and she thought it was a great thing that Zacky was so invovled and being helpful. She also said it wasn't a bad thing if I did start to develop feelings. But I honestly just didn't see things getting to that point any time soon regardless of what everyone thought about it.

"Tee, are you okay up there?" I heard Zacky call from downstairs. I was still laying in bed, watching T.V with Chester's pillow tightly in my hands. Anytime I ever seemed to be having a bad moment or really missing him, I just hugged his pillow and inhaled his faint scent to try and feel better. I still went outside every night and had my talks with him about how badly I missed him and how I wished he could be here to see the birth of his son, to hold him and sing to him, to teach him all the things that I couldn't. "I'm fine." I stated bluntly, flipping the channel to a cooking show. I was constantly at war with my emotions every other day, some days wishing I was never pregnant at all and some days way overjoyed that I was. It was a bipolar rollercoaster to be honest and it exhausted me. I knew Zacky was just trying to be helpful, but I was seriously getting annoyed with how clingy he was being with me. But thankfully he knew full damn well that mine and Chester's room was off limits to anyone except for me and that if he ever even considered crossing that doorway without having my permission, I would throw his ass off out faster than he could even blink.

"You're sure?" I looked over to my left, seeing him now standing outside my room. I sighed with a slight eye roll. "For the thousandth time, yes. I am fine, Zacky." I knew he could hear the sound of irritation in my voice when he grunted, putting his face in his hands. "I don't see why you have to be so difficult, Teegan. I'm just trying to-" I put my hand up instantly to cut him off. "To help yes I know that. And seriously, I appreciate it and all, I really do. But I just don't feel too great today. It's officially the half year mark of Chester's death and I'm really missing him today more than usual Zee. You're being extremely clingy and I understand why, I do, but I just want my space today, please?" He grumbled a few choice words under his breath before turning on his heels and heading back down the stairs. I grabbed my phone from beside me, casually scrolling through the many messages I had recieved. I stopped when I noticed the bands manager and fanclub president had written me. They were going to be having a memorial gathering to celebrate Chester's life and to show that he had definitely not been forgotten even after these gruesome six months and that they wanted me to make an appearance. When I finally reached the end, I saw that the date was set for today at noon. I glanced up at the clock seeing it was already a little after ten, shit. I immediately climbed out of bed as quickly as I could before making my way down to the living room where Zacky was.

"Hey, Zee?" I asked softly once I reached the sofa he was laying on. He peered up at me with an eye closed. "What's wrong?" I took in a deep breath before shaking my head. "I'm really sorry, but I apparently have to attend a fan memorial for Chester today and it stars at noon. Think you could take me?" I smiled weakly at him, letting a tear slip past. His face instantly softened as he nodded and smiled back at me. "Of course I can Tee. You just let me know whenever you're ready to go and we'll head over there, okay?" I leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. "Thanks, I'll only be a few minutes." I said before slowly I dragged myself back up to my room to shower and prepare for the day ahead. Normally I wouldn't mind attending these events because I loved having a part in anything that had to do with Chester and his fans, but only this time I was pregnant and I wasn't exactly sure how everyone would react to the sudden news and appearance. But I knew I had to put the negative thoughts behind me and just try my best to keep focused about the task at hand, honoring my husband.

"You know, if anything was to ever to happen to me, I'd want you to go on, right?" Chester said as we laid in bed one cold December morning, his hands roaming through my hair. I looked up at him, staring deeply into his eyes. We had these kinds of talks before but even just thinking about it made me feel incredibly sad. No one ever wants to imagine their life without a husband or any loved one for that matter. I put my hand to his face and stroked his cheek gently, making him smile. "I know baby, I know you do. But I just don't ever like to think about the idea of not having you with me, Ches. I love you so much, I'm not sure I could make it without you." I now felt the tears rolling down my cheeks as I tried to keep them inside. He pulled me closer to him until I was as close as possible, wrapping his arms tightly around me. "Hey don't cry, I love you too baby. I always will, you're my heart and soul. But I'm just being realistic, Teegan. You have to promise me that you will keep my memory alive." I proceeded to cry harder as he just hugged me, rubbing my back gently. "I'm sorry my love, I wasn't trying to upset you so badly. But I just want you to know that I do love you and that regardless of anything, you are always going to be mine."

It was about fifteen minutes to twelve when we had finally pulled up to the record company, already seeing a swarm of a good thousand fans around the building. Each had their own sign or picture, or something that they had personally done in memory of their idol. I could already feel the tears stinging my eyes the closer I got towards it, hearing his voice echoing through the speakers. Zacky stayed by my side as I went behind the back, making my way over to where I could see Mike and his wife standing alongside Joe and their manager Jim. Everyones face seemed to instantly shift when they noticed me, Mike's wife instantly coming over and hugging me. "Oh my God, you look so beautiful Teegan! Look how much the baby has grown!" I hugged her back tight, finally letting the tears fall free. "Thank you, Anna. It hasn't been easy." She smiled sympathetically at me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "I know hun, but Chester would be so proud of you. You're doing such a fantastic job." I wiped away at the tears, smiling back as we walked over to the others. Mike and Joe hugged me twice as tight, the tears running down both their faces. I hadn't told any of the other members that I was pregnant besides Mike so Joe's reaction was to be expected. "Teegan, when did you? How?" I put a hand to his cheek and sighed. "Right before he passed. We had been trying so hard that whole month, I finally found out it worked a few months later. I want you all at my baby shower in March, I'm having it on Chester's birthday. I'll be revealing the gender and the name." Joe grinned wide, shaking his head vigoriously. "Of course Tee, I wouldn't miss it for the world."

After the memorial started, Mike and Joe had given a speech to the crowd about how grateful they were for everyone attending and being able to pull together once more to honor the life of Chester. Mike had then preformed a combination of "Where'd You Go" crossed with "Sorry For Now" with Joe's help which instantly drove the crowd wild with cheers and tears in their eyes. Once he finished, it was my turn to speak. Anna accompanied me onstage thankfully as I could hear the gasps mixed in with the screams as I was introduced out. I drew in a few shaky breaths before I was able to collect myself enough to speak. "First of all I wanted I want to thank each and every one of you for all your love and support over these past six months, I do read every letter and message you guys write me and I try my best to respond but as you can see, I am expecting a little one. Before Chester had passed away, we were in the process of starting a family. So a few months later I had found out that his idea had worked and I am now six months pregnant with his child. Chester's legacy will be continuing on. With the help and support of our friends, families, and all of you, I've been able to keep it together. So I thank you all for everything and I promise once the baby is born I will let you in on the name and gender. I love you all so much and I know if Chester was here, he would say the same. Again, thank you everyone and I will be seeing you all again soon! I love you always babe and I wish you were here with us today."

The crowd screamed and clapped for me as I waddled off stage and back over to where Zacky was talking with Mike. "I'm feeling really exhausted, do you think you could take me home?" I asked once I reached them. He just nodded with a half smile. "Sure Tee, whenever you're ready." I had made sure to say my goodbyes to everyone, including stopping a few times to recieve pictures and gifts from a few fans who insisted that I take them. When we finally made it to the car and started on the drive back to my house, I noticed a pained look on Zack's face. I knew he was probaby upset that I had continued to keep telling everyone that the baby was Chester's, but what else was I supposed to do? It more than likely was and that was the end of it. "Are you going to ever admit the fact to everyone that there might be another person who is the father of the baby?" He finally spoke up, keeping his eyes focused on the road. I just stayed silent, not knowing what to say to say to him at that point. "That's what I thought." He muttered, a single tear coming down his cheek. I just continued to remain quiet and keep my gaze fixed out of the window.

God, how I really wished Chester was here with me. I need him.

(Zacky's POV)

I wasn't so sure why I let little things like that bother me so much, but I guess the closer it go to the baby being born the more on edge I was becoming. I know it was Teegan's decision if she was ever going to tell anyone about me or not, but a part of me just wished that she would. I tried my best to keep my feelings to myself but I knew they were clear to see, on display for anyone who cared or noticed. When we finally reached the house, I didn't say another word to Teegan as we went our seperate ways. Me straight to the living room couch and her back upstairs to her bedroom.