Handle With Care

(Jade's POV)

Now you're probably thinking that me and Chester got together after our little kiss, right? Well that couldn't be more wrong. In fact, I didn't talk to him after that night and I completely ignored him the next couple of days plus I didn't even answer his texts when he asked if I was going to be there Sunday night. Childish? Completely. I probably just pushed away the only person who ever really cared for me besides my friends and family. And to be quite honest, I was fine with it. He didn't need a person like me around, I would only bring him down and ruin his reputation that he worked so hard to build up. I'm sure I was probably being selfish as well, but there came a point where I didn't care. Melody and KayT begged me to talk to him and at least give him the decency of knowing that I wasn't ready or that I just needed some space. I was even surprised Shae hadn't come after me, especially knowing that I had broke my promise and had more than likely indeed hurt her friend when I said I never would. But I just couldn't. It was already Sunday morning and my phone had been blowing up since I woke up.

Three were from Chester, two were from KayT and finally one was from Shae. Mostly they all asked the same, if I was still going to the show and where we should meet up and such. I just ignored it, casually pretending it didn't happen as I did my daily weekend chores with Melody. As I've said before, I'm never going to admit it that he was actually right and that I was scared of letting someone care for and love me. "So...you're just going to shut everyone out, huh?" Melody spoke up as we attempted to mop the kitchen floor. I shrugged without any second thought, continuing on with my duty. "Jay, what the hell is wrong with you? I get it that you've been through hell but you can't just keep Chester in the dark like this. He really likes you and I know you like him too. So what if it's only been a month you've known each other, maybe it was meant to be. You'll never know until you give it a chance and stop being so scared of everything." I stopped dead in my tracks, realizing what she had said. "I'm not worth it, Mel. I have too much baggage and for fucks sake I'm not even legally allowed to date him." She groaned now, rolling her eyes slightly.

"Please, we'll all be eighteen in a few more months and everyone is totally fine with you two being close. No one's going to call the cops or anything. Stop making excuses Jay!" I bit down on my cheek hard, holding back everything I felt like screaming at her. "Besides, your parents can't do anything to you, you're legally on your own now as long as you live at my house. Why won't you at least just answer his texts? He keeps asking us if you're okay or if something happened to you, he thinks you hate him. What the hell happened after Thursday, Jay?" I shifted my gaze back down to the floor, sighing deeply. I guess they had to find out sooner or later. "We went to the park and got deep into our lives. I told him about how I had been raped and he told me about his abuse. After all was said and done, we kissed." She covered her mouth with her hands after a long gasp, her eyes going wide. Here it comes. "YOU-YOU GUYS KISSED?! WHAT?! WAIT A MINUTE, JAY YOU-YOU'VE BEEN..." She settled down some when she had finally realized what I had said. I just started to mop again, hoping she'd drop the subject. But when she pulled me into a hug, I knew that it wasn't over. "Oh my God, Jay I am so sorry that happened to you. Jeez, he probably thinks he hurt you or something. You have to talk to him or at least come to the show tonight. You two need to work this out."

I tensed up greatly, dreading the thought of having to see him again. I knew I had made a mistake by not talking to him but I was just too scared. "I can't." I muttered bluntly before she grabbed a hold of my shoulders firmly, making her look at her in the eyes. "Jay, you can't keep being scared. Just go tonight, please. I am begging you, please this has to happen please." I knew if I had given up, she more than likely would stop pestering me and begging, so I reluctantly gave in after a few good more minutes of endless pleading and hoping. She again just hugged me tightly, saying that everything was going to work out just fine, that I'll be happy that I went in the end. I had ran out of things to say by then, so I just nodded with a smile as we hurried to finish up with our work so that we could actually be allowed to go to the show with KayT tonight.

After a good few more hours of housework, Melody and I had finally finished, our rooms and the entire house looking completely new. More than satisfied with our hard work, Melody's mom rewarded us with Chinese food and permission to go out to see Chester's band preform tonight in downtown. I couldn't count the number of times I had locked myself in the bathroom and swore that I wasn't going to go anymore and that I couldn't face him. But each time there was Melody waiting outside the door, practically screaming her heart out that we had to go and that I couldn't back out now, because she had already told Chester I was going. I knew she didn't actually text him, but he sure did. Ten times total to be exact.

"I know I've probably bugged you a million times today but here's one more. I really hope I'll get to see you tonight, we go on at 9. I'm truly sorry if I've done something to hurt or upset you Jay. I just want to make things right. CB" My heart sank as I read it, feeling my heart basically break into a million pieces. It wasn't fair to him because he honestly didn't do anything, it was my own fears and my own self that was really causing all the drama. So I finally gave in and responded, telling him that he had no reason to be sorry and that it was just me being difficult. I didn't mention that I was going to be there tonight because now I wanted to surprise him. Melody helped me add the finishing touches to my outfit, curling my hair into tight curls and adjusting my boot laces. I ended up wearing a form fitting Joy Division tee with ripped skinnies and an army trench coat. Once again, I looked damn good.

It was around 8 when we had finally picked up KayT and made our way over to the venue. There had to be at least 500 people all crammed inside. We somehow managed to shove our ways through to the front of the stage, seeing a familiar face instantly. "Hey! Glad you guys could make it!" Shae greeted us cheerfully with a grin and hugs. "The guys are just about to go on, Chester didn't think you were gonna make it." She said with a half smile. I sighed, a pang of guilt hitting me right in the chest. "Well I wanted to surprise him." I said with a wink, making her laugh thankfully. The lights dimmed almost twenty minutes later, causing everyone to get antsy and start to cheer. We must have been shifted around about ten times until the guys started to appear one by one. My eyes glued themselves on Chester as Shae blew a kiss to Mike. He immediately caught Chester's attention, signaling that we were in fact there. I noticed his facial expression change dramatically when his eyes finally met with mine.

They started off their set heavy, playing 'One Step Closer' and 'Points of Authority' first off causing us to get slammed and tossed around in the mix. Then they slowed it down some with 'In The End' before Chester spoke up, announcing he was dedicating this next song to someone incredibly special to him. "She's here tonight with some good friends, so Jay this one is for you." In a mere matter of seconds were Melody, KayT and Shae all making cooing and "Aww!" noises at me as 'Crawling' started to be played. Now maybe it was just me, but Chester had pretty much kept all his attention focused towards us as he sang, like if he was speaking directly to me. Not that I minded though, because he was nothing short of amazing.

When the crowd started to chant for the song 'My December' towards the end of the set, I knew Chester wasn't going to disappoint them and play it. Only it tugged at my heart strings the minute it started, causing tears to swell up in my eyes. It almost felt as if the song spoke to me from the heart. It made me think of my mom, it made me miss family terribly. I must have zoned out for a good minute though because I finally snapped out of it when Shae had begun shaking me, saying that Chester was going to come down into the crowd to sing this last one. My mouth hung open slightly once I comprehended what she had said. But before I had time to react, he appeared right in front of me. He grabbed onto my hand, holding it tightly in his grasp as he sang. I felt my heart beating fast in my chest, feeling like I was going to pass out or faint right in front of everyone. Only the more he sang, the more I basically got lost in his eyes and lifted away by his voice. Nothing seemed to matter around me anymore as I was stuck in a trance.

As he was about to sing the last part of the song, he did the absolutely unthinkable once again and caught me off gaurd as he leaned over the barricade to kiss me quickly on the lips. He jumped back on stage, a huge smile plastered on his face as he belted out the last words "Give it all away, to have someone to come home to.". My face must have been drained of all its color after that, because Shae said she must be looking at a ghost. "I think it's official though, Jay. Chester wants you to be his." I stood there in shock as I tried to make sense of everything going on and what she had meant by that. But ultimately I knew, he wanted me to be his girlfriend, it was more than obvious.

But sadly, something kept weighing itself down on my shoulders as I tried to imagine that happening. I'd love nothing more than that, to finally get to try my first real relationship, to finally have a chance at finding love. But in my clouded and depression filled mind, it didn't seem possible, it didn't seem fitting. Simply because, I didn't deserve him.