I Know I Was for a While

“So” Lucille mused as she sipped on her glass of water “How are you feeling, Camila?” she asked, offering a look towards her daughter who sat on the opposite side of the table, quietly perusing the menu.

It had been a while, after Camila had informed her of her pregnancy and the end of her relationship with Noah, opportunities for the two of them to get together had been few and far between, but with a break in her schedule, Lucille had been quick to invite Camila out for the afternoon, wanting to check in with how she was doing. They had talked a lot, in the few weeks that had passed since she’d visited her daughter at Lionel’s home, she and Camila had shared copious phone calls and texts, but still she was glad to see her in person, even if she didn’t want to spend the entire afternoon fussing over her. She wanted to make sure that she was handling things as well as she could be.

Camila, who was quietly reading the menu, quirked a small smirk at her mother’s question, something which made Lucille tilt her head. “What are you smirking at?” she asked before she turned towards their waiter, reciting their order to him.

“Nothing” Camila replied “Leo just owes me some money. I bet him that the first thing you did would be to ask how I’m feeling” she added amusedly.

Lucille rolled her eyes. “Am I wrong to take an interest?” she played along “I mean, you are carrying my first grandbaby. Aren’t I allowed to be a little curious about it?” she added.

Camila nodded, her smile softening slightly. “Of course you are, mama” she mused “And I will tell you whatever you want to know” she added.

Lucille offered her a look, briefly thinking over her next words, before she reached her hand across the table, gently taking a hold of Camila’s which pulled lightly at the table cloth. “I am sure that you don’t want to talk about him” she mumbled “And if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s the father of my first grandchild, I’d be more than happy to never mention his name in conversation again, but have you heard from him?” she asked tentatively.

Camila quirked a weak smile, not missing the fact that her mother hadn’t said Noah’s name, before she shook her head, her eyes fixed on the table that sat ahead of her. “I haven’t” she mumbled “I’ve been tempted to call him a few times, but I haven’t done it, and even if I did, I think I know that he’d not pick up. It’s been weeks, mama, and he’s not tried to call me and I don’t think he’s going to. He’s made himself pretty clear when it comes to this” she added, her dark eyes briefly peeking down towards her stomach.

She couldn’t deny that it still hurt, with only a few weeks having passed since she had told Noah about her pregnancy, the idea that he didn’t want anything to do with her or with their baby was one which was still incredibly painful to her, but she knew that she wasn’t going to change his mind, no matter how much she wanted to. The fact that he hadn’t even tried to contact her told her all she needed to know.

Lucille followed Camila’s stare downwards for a split second before she squeezed her hand tightly. “Then he’s an idiot, sweetheart” she mused “And he’s going to miss out on something pretty amazing” she added, her face brightening with a comforting smile.

Camila offered her mother a look, not missing the warm smile that she sported, before she nodded quietly, something which caused Lucille to squeeze her hand once more. “How are you feeling in yourself?” she asked, trying to move the topic away from Noah and towards Camila’s pregnancy.

Camila, who’d moved to take a sip from her glass of orange juice, shrugged. “I feel OK” she mused “I mean, I still get nauseous quite frequently, and I am starting to feel more and more tired, but it’s still pretty early. I’ve got another scan in a couple of weeks, though, and I’m looking forwards to that” she explained, her expression brightening a little as she spoke.

Lucille grinned, admiring the bright expression that had quickly spread over Camila’s face, before she shook her head. “I could come with you” she offered “I mean, if you’d not mind your mama tagging along. I’d love to be there” she enthused.

Camila shook her head. “I’d love that” she mused.

Lucille flashed her another warm smile, allowing a moment of silence to pass between the two of them before the sound of a phone vibrating filled the air. Shaking her head, Camila moved to slip her phone out of her jacket pocket before she spared a look down at the screen, a small smile spreading across her lips.

Lucille noticed the smile before she tilted her head. “Who’s that?” she poked.

Camila, who’d started to type out a reply, shook her head. “It’s just Leo” she replied.

Lucille nodded slowly, thinking over her next words for a second before she shook her head. She hadn’t missed it, the way that Camila’s face had lit up when she’d looked down at the text from Lionel had been clear and obvious, and whilst Lucille was pleased to see that someone was making her daughter smile, she wanted to warn her slightly, not wanting her to get ahead of herself. Things were complicated for her, with her hurting over Noah whilst trying to get her head around the idea that she was only a few months away from becoming a mother, her emotions were likely to be a little all over the place, and Lucille didn’t want to see her get too attached to Lionel, even if she was glad that she had him around. The last thing she wanted was for something to happen between them that Camila ended up regretting.

“You two are still getting on Ok?” she asked.

“Me and Leo?” Camila asked, slightly confused by the question.

Lucille nodded. “You’ve been staying with him for a few weeks” she commented “I thought you’d start to get bored of one another” she added, trying to keep her voice light and teasing.

Camila shook her head. “It’s been good” she mused “I mean, it’s not likely to be a permanent thing, but Leo’s tried his hardest to make sure that I am comfortable, and I’m grateful for it. He’s been amazing, mama” she fussed with a warm smile.

“I don’t doubt it” Lucille replied “I mean, he’s a pretty great guy. I was amazed that you didn’t catch onto how great he was before you and...Noah got together” she teased, stumbling a little over her daughter ex-boyfriend’s name.

Camila shook her head, a slight hint of a blush spreading over her cheeks. “Mama...”

“I know that you loved Noah” Lucille interrupted, cutting off Camila’s inevitable complaints “And I am not trying to start a conversation about your love life right now, I just...I saw your face light up when you looked down at that text from Leo and I just want to ask you to be careful. Now’s not exactly the best time for you to think about...”

“He’s Leo, mama” Camila interrupted.

Lucille nodded. “I know” she mused “But I know you, Camila, and I saw the smile on your face. You might be able to fool other people, but I know that look, and I just...I want you to be careful with this. You’ve got a lot going on right now, and the last thing I want to see is you get hurt more, or Leo get hurt too” she explained.

Camila frowned at her mother’s words before she slowly nodded her head, something which made Lucille smile at her warmly before their waiter reappeared, placing their meals down in front of them. She knew that it wasn’t much to go on, Camila and Lionel had always been close and the sight of her smiling at his text wasn’t uncommon, but Lucille knew the look on Camila’s face and she wanted to warn her early, even if there was nothing between her and Lionel. She wanted to encourage Camila to be careful in whatever it was that happened between the two of them.