Fragile

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(Jade's POV)

As a week passed by, I still didn't feel any better as time went on. I tried my best to hide how I was feeling on some days but it was useless, Chester saw right through it. We had complied a list of all the things we wanted to do together regardless of knowing my fate or not. As cheesy and cliche as it sounded, we titled it "Jay&Chester's Epic Adventures". No one knew about it and we weren't going to tell anyone besides Brad who promised he wouldn't say anything to anyone unless we had told him to. Melody had came over a couple of times to hangout and tell me about a school she had gotten accepted to. It was a specific class about music journalism and creative writing. As tempting as it sounded, I wasn't going to let anything take up any of my time and distract me from doing things with Chester. Shae and Mike had come over the other day to tell us her due date and I swore she was getting bigger each day that passed. November 9th, the first day that I had met Chester. I just about cried when I had heard it, what a better way to bring in a child then on a special occasion. We were in the middle of discussing the plans for our day when Chester's phone had started to ring loudly. It was Shae and Mike, they wanted to know if we wanted to go on a double date with them to the movies. Chester left the decision entirely up to me, but not wanting to feel like I was excluding them, I agreed. He told them that we would meet them at the theater in an hour or so after we finished getting ready.

I made sure to apply a small amount of eyeliner and some blush to bring some life to my obviously tired looking face. I didn't want them to think that anything was wrong with me so I kept up the happy face as best as I could. "You're still so beautiful to me, even without the makeup." Chester's sweet voice whispered in my ear as he stood behind me in the mirror. We looked so cute together, especially since he had shaved his head completely, it made his face stand out a lot more. I turned so I was facing him before I kissed him softly on the lips. "You always know how to make sure I'm feeling good, don't you?" He nodded which made me giggle some. God he was so fucking adorable. "Are you ready to go?" I asked as I glanced down at his outfit quickly. Button up shirt, baggy pants, yep. Typical Chester Bennington going out attire. I grinned as I then looked over at my own self. I had gone the extra mile to look a little more girly so I was overly satisfied with how everything had turned out. We gather up our belongings before locking up the house and heading out the front door. The drive to the movie theater was pleasantly quite. We didn't need to make conversation each time we were with each other, sometimes the silence was enough to get us by until we made it to wherever we were going. I glanced over at him a couple times, a smile on his lips every time.

When we finally pulled up to the theater, Shae and Mike were waiting out in front for us with our tickets already. We were seeing a movie called "A Walk To Remember" and it was supposedly a really good romance type of movie. When we took our seats, Chester instantly put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him. We kissed a couple of times before the lights had dimmed and the movie started to play. So let me just warn you now, this is the most saddest and fucked up movie I had ever seen. Sure it was romantic and full of sappy love type of things but the whole idea behind the movie was just the most horrible thing ever to have witnessed. Maybe it was because I could relate to it sort of? Well more like mostly. Maybe because the guy meets the girl who turns out to be the love of his life and she ends up dying in the end from brain cancer? I cried and sobbed loudly so bad that I had to leave the theater. Chester of course came with me and held me the entire time until I could stop long enough so everyone would stop staring. "I'm so so sorry baby, I had no idea it was going to go that way." I sniffled, it wasn't his fault, no one could have really known it was going to end up like that. I looked up at him and smiled weakly. "It's not your fault babe, honestly. None of us knew it was going to be that type of movie." He returned the smile until we were met up with Mike and Shae. Both of them had tears in their own eyes which made me laugh lightly.

"Are you okay, hun? I'm so sorry Jay, I had no idea it was that kind of movie." I shook my head with a smile at her. "Damn it Mike, you're not allowed to pick the movies anymore!" We all laughed now, wiping the tears from our own eyes. We had agreed we were going to meet up later on for a dinner at mine and Chester's house, parting our separate ways once we reached the outside of the theater. We walked hand in hand back to the car until he opened the door for me, like he always does, and kissed me before he shut it. We had looked over at our list and seeing as it was still early enough we decided we were going to go to the beach for a little while and write our names in the sand like I had written down. But on the way I had noticed that I had missed a call from an unknown number while we were in the movies. I listened to the voicemail, my throat instantly tightening up. It was my doctor's office, they finally had the results back in and they wanted me to come in right away so they could discuss them with me. I told Chester as calmly as I could, trying to fight off the urge to cry as soon as I saw the look in his eyes turn worried. I held onto his hand tightly as we turned around and made our way to the hospital. I kept praying over and over in my mind, that this would all be fine.

We reached the hospital in a matter of minutes, my hands shaking and my whole body trembling as we walked up to the main entrance. I couldn't keep steady as we made our way up to the third floor. Chester kept his hands gripped onto mine the entire time until we waited for my name to be called. My stomach twisted and turned into knots, the feeling of panic starting to over take me once I heard a nurse call out to me. I made sure Chester didn't come with me because I wanted to do this alone, I couldn't handle him hearing the bad news. I wanted to be able to tell him myself. I sat down on the small exam table, the doctor coming in a few moments after the nurse had taken my vitals. She had closed the door and sat down in front of me, a folder file in her hands. She opened it before flipping to a certain page. "So Miss Martinez." She began but I quickly corrected her. "Call me Mrs. Bennington, please." She looked a bit surprised but none the less agreed to it.

"Mrs. Bennington, I'm sorry it took so long to get these results back to you but we wanted to be a hundred percent sure on everything before we gave you any sort of diagnosis. Are you sure you don't want to bring your husband in to hear this?" I shook my head, I didn't want him hear, only me. "Well after a few dozen analysis and tests we did on the mass, it came back positive for a rare form of intestinal cancer. I am so sorry, but since we got it in time, we have a high chance of beating this before anything gets worse. We can start you right away on chemo and sorts of different medications, we could beat this. But without it and if you don't accept it, then you will have a few months left to live. About half a year, give or take." It all went black from there.

My worse fear had finally came true. I should have expected this all along, though. I knew I wasn't feeling well, I knew there was something wrong. So why am I so upset now? Why am I so shocked and surprised that this was the outcome? I should have expected it, it's what I deserved. I had done so much wrong in my life that it was all finally catching up to me. I had finally gotten the karma that was long over due. Just as my life was about to begin and I was about to finally be happy, it was all being taken away from me. In the blink of an eye, it was all going to be ripped apart into pieces.

(Chester's POV)

I sat nervously in the waiting room for Jay to come back out. I was devastated when she wouldn't let me go back there with her but in the end I knew it was her choice and that I would be there for her regardless of anything. I was gripping onto the arm rests of the chair I was sitting in anxiously as I looked toward the door every time it had opened to see if it was Jay. Twenty minutes had passed and I still hadn't heard anything. But I knew I had to be patient because things take time, I just wished it wasn't so hard for me to not think the worst of everything. I tried my hardest to push out all the negative thoughts that kept clouding my mind but nothing was working. I kept thinking about what would happen if Jay wasn't around anymore, how different my life would be without her. I kept thinking about what it would be like not to able to hug her and tell her how much I loved her each and every single day. The tears started to leak down my face as I finally saw the door open again, this time revealing Jay. She looked like she had been crying pretty badly, so I instantly ran to her side. I held her close to me, waiting until we got back outside to the car to ask her about what they had said. I knew it should have waited until we had gotten home, but I was desperate to know.

She kept quite for a good long while, her eyes seeming so out of it and her face was distant. Of course I was worried, she wasn't the same as before she went in there. I kept my hand on her knee as I drove, only when we stopped at a red light did I fully look at her. "Jade, baby. What did they tell you? Did they say anything to you?" She stayed silent again, not saying a word. Growing more upset and frustrated now, I pulled over to the side of the road. I grabbed onto her hand tight and practically begged for her to talk to me. She wouldn't budge, but the more I pleaded and begged, the harder she fought me. Finally when I had tried everything and we had pulled into the driveway of our house, she faced me, the tears just running down her cheeks consistently. She sobbed uncontrollably a few times and sucked in a shaky deep breath as she screamed out the words that I never thought I would ever have to hear come from her beautiful voice in my life. "I have cancer, Chester. I'm fucking sick and dying, I have a rare form of intestinal cancer."

My entire world started spinning out of control as I gathered what was being said. She was sick, she had cancer, she was dying. The reality finally hit me when she showed me the paperwork that they had given her. She was diagnosed at an early stage, so with the right treatment, she could beat it. Without any sort of treatment or medications, she could have maybe a maximum of 5 to 6 months tops. "But you can get better, baby. That's what they are there for, so you can get better. It's not the end of the road, Jade. You can win this." She shook her head violently as she slammed her fists into the dashboard. "No! I don't want to! I don't want to be filled with all kinds of chemicals and have my hair fall out! I don't want it, I give up! I want to die, I've always tried, now just let me finally do it for good this time. Let me live out the rest of my life the way I want to! Let me die!"