Status: Completed <3

We're Going to Hell

Trying To Find A Way To Get Away From Me

I woke up, once again, on the other side of the bed from Jimmy. It was now two days after Christmas, and he had been acting very strange lately. He was very distant, blunt, and he was always out of it. He wouldn’t eat, he wouldn’t touch me, he wouldn’t even look at me. I was starting to get very worried, not as much as for our relationship, but what was going on with him. I turned to look at his back. I couldn’t tell if he was awake or not, because all he usually did starting yesterday was lie down and stare at the closet door. I hoisted myself up from the bed, and walked into the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and washed my face, putting my dark purple hair into a sloppy ponytail. I looked at Jimmy’s face through the mirror. It was a lot more pale, and his eyes were bloodshot. My own face came back into focus, and you could see what the stress was doing.

I left the bathroom and headed out towards the kitchen as I started making breakfast. I was still going to urge him on to eat, because I didn’t want him starving to death. I took out the pancake mix, along with milk and eggs, and made the batter. I took out a skillet, and turned on the stove, pouring some of the batter into the pan so it made something that resembled a circle. I watched it as it rose, and became a golden brown color, and I put the pancake on a plate, then placed a few pieces of bacon in the skillet, keeping my distance as the hot grease spurted out in any and every direction. Eventually I was done making the food, and I placed the pan in the sink, and poured a glass of orange juice. I picked up the cup and plate and walked back to our room, placing the food on the side table in front of him.

“Please eat, Jimmy,” I begged, and he glanced up at me.

“Not hungry,” he mumbled.

“You’re going to starve,” I pointed out, my voice rising a little bit. All he did was shrug one of his shoulders, and I slumped, “I can’t deal with this,” I said, more to myself. I slightly shook my head as I went to the closet, retrieving a small backpack. I two pairs of close, and then went to the dressers as I pulled out a pair of shorts, and a t-shirt. I grabbed a few pairs of undergarments and went to the bathroom, putting my brush, makeup, and hygiene stuff in the bag. I stuffed a few of my school books into my bag, seeing as I haven’t really been studying, and added my phone and its charger, laptop, and wallet. I threw the bag over my shoulder, and grabbed my car keys, and left the apartment. I got in my car, and sat there for a few minutes with my forehead resting on the steering wheel. Was I really about to leave for a day or two, leaving him here by himself? I loved him, of course, but I couldn’t take how he was acting. I took out my phone, and sorted through my contacts until I came onto Saleigh’s number, and pressed the call button.

“Oh, look, you detached yourself from what’s his face long enough to talk to me,” she said, sarcastically.

“Can, can I stay with you and Zacky for a day or two?” I went straight to the question. I wasn’t really in the mood to fuck around.

“Yeah, of course. Why? What happened?” Her sadistic side was instantly replaced with a concerned tone, something you barely ever got from Saleigh Vaughn.

“I’ll talk about it when I get there,” I said softly.

“O-okay. I’ll be waiting,” she said, and we hung up after saying our goodbyes. I turned the key in the ignition, and carefully backed out of my parking space. I drove the few minutes over to the house Saleigh and Zacky shared together, and parked behind Zacky’s black Escalade, then thought twice about it, because if he wanted to back out, he’d just go right over my poor ‘Vette, so I backed out again, and parked on their front lawn. I grabbed my stuff from the passenger side, and then stepped out of the car. After slamming the door, I made my way to the front door, and walked in without knocking.

“AH!” I screamed at the site in front of me, trying to duck into the kitchen, but instead knocking my head on the wall, and passing out.

,,,

I woke up on the twin bed placed in the only guest bedroom that was downstairs by the new game room Saleigh gave Zacky for Christmas. I really wish I didn’t walk into Zacky groping Saleigh on the couch when I walked into the house. I shuddered at the memory, and I wanted nothing more than to just get that image out of my head. I threw my feet over the edge of the bed and stood up. I grabbed a pair of jeans and a Green Day shirt I had placed into my bag, and a few other items as I walked into the bathroom that was connected to the bedroom. I stripped off my clothes as I got into the shower, and washed myself. I couldn’t help but let my mind wander to Jimmy, and what was wrong. I couldn’t help but wonder why he was acting so strange, and if this would pass anytime soon. I remembered how he acted when I told him I loved him. Maybe…maybe that’s why he was acting like this. Perhaps he wasn’t serious about us at all, and I drove him away by saying that. My heart ached at the thought, and then soap got into my eyes. I turned around abruptly to face the water, and slipped in the process. Luckily, I didn’t pass out or anything, so I just stood back up. I was careful with the rest of my shower, and I stepped out, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around me.

I looked down at my leg as I dried off, a bruise already making its visible form. I sighed as I got into my clothes and brushed out my hair, and looked at myself in the reflection. He didn’t love me back. I couldn’t help but think that’s what it was. I frowned at myself, and left the bathroom, and walked out to the living room, staring at my feet as I walked.

“Payd,” Saleigh’s voice came through, “It’s okay. Zacky’s not here. Nice parking space, by the way. That went over well with him,” I looked up at her, and grinned, “now you mind telling me what happened?” she asked, sitting down on the couch, and placing two cans of grape soda on the table. I took the seat next to her, and picked up the can, examining it.

“Jimmy’s acting strange,” I said, trying not to let my heart drop from it.

“Jimmy’s always strange. You just noticed it?” she asked, and I rolled my eyes at her.

“All he’s been doing lately is lay around. He won’t eat, shower, get up,” I was more descriptive this time, so she had more of an idea.

“Jimmy didn’t shower in the first place,” she furrowed her eyebrows together.

“Sal, I’m serious. I’m so worried. This all started when I told him I loved him. He just…I don’t think he loves me back,” I looked down at my feet.

“Of course he does,” she made a motion where she looked like she was about to hug me, and abruptly went back to how she was sitting. Then she went to hug me again, and looked like she was struggling with it, “What…what’s not to love?”

“No he doesn’t, I pushed him away,” I sighed and put my head in my hands.

“This hug…when…when can I stop?” she asked, and I couldn’t help myself but laugh. Comforting wasn’t anywhere near her area of expertise.

“Now,” I said, and she sighed a ‘thank god’ as she immediately let her arms drop, “Is this what you do with Zacky?” I furrowed my eyebrows together as I looked at her.

“No, you just saw what I do with Zacky,” she smirked, and I felt something churn in my stomach.

“I..I…” I tried to make a sentence, but I ran to the nearest toilet, just in case. After that, Saleigh and I decided to make breakfast, and then we decided to go out and get breakfast because making food would be just a little bit too much effort on any of our parts. We went to an iHOP, where we spent almost half of the day eating pancakes. Then we decided to go to the mall, because it was across the street. We rarely ever shopped; we usually go to make fun of most of the people there. We started back to the house after our adventure of freaking people out, to find that Zacky was now home.

“I’ve got to get back to writing,” Saleigh said as she turned off the engine. She was currently writing a novel. She wasn’t a best-selling author, but she had a lot of her work out there, and it did bring some money in. She was a great writer, and I would have killed her if she wasn’t doing anything with that talent. I was always arguing with my parents as a teen, so they suggested lawyer school – even paid for it. Which reminded me, I had to do some studying. I changed into a pair of shorts, and grabbed the big book, opening it, and laying down on the bed. I started taking notes on what we were told would be on the upcoming test. I tried my best to get amazing grades so I would pass the first time, because if I didn’t, I would become a hobo.

I passed out, my cheek pressed against the text of the book, and I woke up the next morning to find my drool all over the page. I sighed as I wiped it off on the pillow case, and closed it shut. I would go back to my apartment later, and try to talk to Jimmy. I couldn’t stand seeing him like this, or even thinking about how he was right now. I looked at the clock on the nightstand to find that it was almost the afternoon. Saleigh would still be asleep, but Zacky would be awake. He was one of Jimmy’s best friends, so hopefully he knew what was up with Jimmy. I walked out of my room, feeling the warmth of the heater, but the floor was fucking freezing, so my steps were quick. I walked into the little game room to find Zacky and Brian. Brian was also very close to Jimmy. I’m surprised the three hadn’t fucked together.

“Hey, babe,” Brian smirked as he sat back, and I rolled my eyes.

“Hey, fuck tart,” I replied, and Zacky snickered.

“What’s up, Payd,” Zacky asked as he looked at the game screen. It looked as if he were playing Call of Duty. The guys were currently obsessed with Black Ops. They were more childish then most of the children I knew, which I guess is one of the reasons I love being around them.

“I was going to ask you guys something, and see if you know what’s up with Jimmy,” I asked, and they looked at me, confused expressions everywhere on their faces.

“Why? Is there something wrong with him?” Brian leaned forward as he looked at me.

“He’s acting –“ I decided on different choice of words, because saying Jimmy was acting strange would mean that he was acting more normal than usual “-He won’t leave bed. He’s not sick. He won’t shower. He will barely talk or look at me. He won’t eat. I’m so worried,” I leaned against the foosball table.

“He was perfectly fine last time I saw him,” Zacky said, using the controller to pause his game, “Is that why you stayed here last night,” it seemed like he was finally putting it together, and I nodded.

“Well, if things don’t work out,” Brian winked at me, and a laugh escaped my lips.

“I can go talk to him for you,” Zacky offered, and I nodded again.

“Please,” I begged, and he stood up.

“You’re like a baby sister to me. Annoying and all,” he came over and hugged me, and I hugged him back.

“You’re like an older brother. Gay and all,” I countered, and he scoffed.

“I’m engaged to Saleigh,” he defended himself.

“What the fuck does that prove,” I smirked as he pulled away, and he just shook his head.

“Rude,” he scoffed, and walked out. I was thankful I had these guys as a friend, and hopefully Zacky would be able to talk to some sense into Jimmy. I was so dead worried that it was making me sick to my stomach. Speaking of my stomach, it grumbled, telling me I was hungry; very hungry.

“Food?” Brian asked, and I just noticed that he stayed behind.

“Yeah,” I said, and I followed him out to the kitchen.

“I can’t cook for shit, so, I’ll make cereal,” he grinned, and I just shook my head.

“That sounds amazing right now,” I pulled myself up to the counter as he pilfered through their cabinets, finding the right stuff. He poured the Coa-coa puffs into the bowls, followed by milk, and plopped in oversized spoons. He handed me one as we walked out to the living room. I dove into my bowl when I heard my phone going off from the guest room. I placed the bowl down on the coffee table as I ran to catch the call before it was too late.

“Yeah,” I said breathlessly into the phone.

“Hey,” Zacky said, “the doors locked, so…where’s the key?” he asked.

“You see the coffin ornament with the big anti-Christ cross on it by the door?” I asked.

“Couldn’t miss it,” he said.

“There’s one taped behind that. Jimmy always forgets his key,” I said, and I heard the shuffling of him moving the coffin, and the sound of tape being ripped from its surface.

“Got it,” he said.

“Okay,” we said our goodbyes and I hung up, going back out to the living room. I put the phone down, and picked up my bowl. The cereal was already turning soggy, so I got up again, and dumped it out in the sink. I washed out the bowl, and put it back in the cabinet. I returned to the couch, and heard Saleigh now coming down the stairs.

“Hey,” she mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

“You look like the freaking bride of Frankenstein,” I said, and it took no effort for her to flip me off. My phone started going off, and the caller ID read Zacky’s name. I answered it, and he sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

“Hospital,” was all I managed to hear.

“Wh-why?” I asked, already standing up.

“Jimmy. He – he’s dead.”

©Shannon.