How Did We Get Here?

Chapter Eleven - Stress for Stress

Hannah wasn't used to having to hide from people, she didn't like it, she was very sociable by nature. That evening, however, she couldn't bring herself to go home and spend time with Danny, she couldn't bring herself to see Roxanna or her father, and any consolation she might once have found in John was gone; she just wanted to be alone. She wandered around the surrounding area of the hospital without an aim and eventually found herself outside the pub. She sighed as she looked at the spot where she'd gotten drunk and kissed Ollie, how much simpler things could have been if she'd just fallen for him instead of one her bosses and her father’s best friend.
She found herself walking into the loud pub before she really registered what she was doing. Hooked on a Feeling by Blue Swede was blasting over the speakers, mixed with the multitude of overlapping conversations. She heard snatches of discussions of people discussing her and the day's events at the hospital, she couldn't escape, but she could dissolve into a sea of people.
She fought her way to the bar where she found Dom sitting with Lofty, Nicky and Meena, they all looked sombre. Dom noticed her first and jumped from his chair, rushing to her and grabbing her wordlessly, pulling her into a bear hug. She let herself be squished by him to the point of suffocation before she pulled away and offered him a weak smile; the others were looking at her with a mixture of pity and uncertainty as she joined them.
'How are you?' Lofty asked and Hannah shrugged.
'It's been one hell of a day.' she replied quietly, debating whether to share John's outburst.
'Roxanna was looking for you and Professor Gaskell, Ms Tate said you'd both left for the day.' Dom said and Hannah twisted her fingers together uncomfortably.
'Yeah I think John got out of there pretty quickly.' she replied.
'Yeah well he had time to leave me a message to say that I was no longer needed for the trial.' Meena commented drily, grimacing into her drink. Hannah raised an eyebrow at her but rolled her eyes and shook off her irritation, it wasn't the time nor the place to vent her frustrations.
'I need a drink.' she commented briskly, half as an excuse just to get away, and left the small group before any of them, notably Dom, could stop her. She meandered through the crowd of people until she found a patch of the bar which was quieter, she waited patiently until the bartender could get to her. There was a man sat next to her who looked her up and down and she caught him staring.
'Hi, sorry, aren't you that doctor from the news?' he asked, he was attractive even to Hannah, on any other night she might even have flirted, she wasn't in the mood tonight though.
'Yeah, that's me alright.' she replied quietly, hoping he would drop the conversation.
'I think it's so unfair what your boss did to you, making you believe it was your fault and all that.' the man continued and Hannah gave the bartender her order. 'Did you know her? The doctor who died I mean.'
'She was my friend.' Hannah replied hotly, glaring at him as she prepared her money.
'I'm sorry, no really I am sorry for your loss.' the man said and Hannah softened a little, he hadn't meant to upset her.
'It's been a tough day, sorry for snapping.' she said and the man gave her a smile.
'I'm Colin.' he said and held out a hand, she looked at it for a moment and raised an eyebrow before shaking it quickly.
'Hannah.' she replied and then heard a cough behind her. She turned to see Abigail looking at her with a judging look.
'You move on fast.' Abigail commented and Hannah rolled her eyes.
'Are you following me?' she asked and Abigail smiled.
'No, I didn't expect you to be here to be honest.' she replied and Hannah rubbed the back of her neck.
'It's been a stressful day, I wanted to raise a toast to...' Hannah trailed off and shut her eyes, maybe the drink wasn't the best idea.
'Hannah, go home. Be with your family.' Abigail advised, putting her hand on her shoulder. Hannah reached behind her and took her drink from the counter, downing it quickly and then placing it back, she immediately felt a little woozy, it had been a few months since she’d had alcohol in any form and she devised that it had gone straight to her head.
‘I’ll go, but honestly Abigail, I had no idea about any of it, John’s feelings for me, the trial and the problems with the neo-conduit, I had no idea.’ Hannah told her quickly and Abigail nodded, averting her eyes. Hannah knew that she was just following procedure and she had to think about the how it all looked from the outside as well, she had to think about how the press would spin the story, Hannah had spent enough time helping her father figure out sticky situations to understand it all too well. It didn’t stop Hannah from feeling a little betrayed by Abigail though, at a time when she really needed her support she felt like she was being treated like a naughty school girl caught in the act of completing a dare she hadn’t even wanted to do in the first place.
Abigail left without saying another word and a wave of dizziness hit Hannah so hard she had to turn back to the bar to grab onto the counter and stop herself falling. Colin held out a hand to catch her and he looked at her with a small smile.
‘Are you okay?’ he asked and she shook her head.
‘I just need to go home.’ she replied quietly and began to make her way to the door. Colin watched her disappear into the crowd and after a moment tapped the arm of a man who was sitting next to him. Together they rose, leaving their drinks unfinished, and followed Hannah towards the door.
Hannah felt the relief of the cool air on her face as she emerged from the busy pub and she took a moment to breathe it in but her head continued to spin. This wasn’t the effects of alcohol, she knew that much, this was something worse, she suddenly grew afraid as she considered that she had barely glanced at her drink, had she been spiked?
She clutched at the wall and tried to edge closer to the main road, it was still quiet outside of the pub, there wasn’t anyone she could ask for help. Once she was at the main road, she knew she could get help, it was just a little further.
She was nearly there, her head growing worse all the while, when she felt a strong pair of hands on her arms. She immediately thought of John and prayed it was him, despite the circumstances being incredibly unlikely. She felt safe with John, she wished she hadn’t been so quick to push him away, she needed him then.
‘Hey there, you don’t look too good.’ a voice said from behind her and Colin’s face swam into view along with another man’s.
‘Yeah let us help you.’ the other man said and they roughly took one of her arms each and guided her into an alleyway, she tried to fight back but it felt like she was underwater, her limbs dragged through the air and she struggled to control them. She could hardly breathe let alone fight back.
‘What did you put in my drink?’ she mumbled, aware that her voice sounded jumbled and confused. She could barely walk and they half dragged her down the alleyway until they were content that they were away from the prying eyes of any passers-by.
'Do you want to go first?' Colin asked the other man, still holding Hannah up around the waist, she tried to push him away again but he batted her hands away with little effort.
'Nah mate, you did the hard work and ran the risk, you go first.' the other man said and Hannah felt panic surging in her as she realised what was happening. She let the panic fill her and influence her actions, she lashed out and suddenly screamed. She wasn't loud and she wasn't strong but she still seemed to be proving a nuisance to the men, Colin pushed her hard against the wall and she felt a little disoriented but continued to fight back with as much as she could. Thoughts of Danny flooded her mind, she knew she had to fight for him, thoughts of John intermingled with these and she was vaguely aware of tears pouring down her cheeks as she wished he would emerge in that moment like a knight in shining armour. She wished that anyone would show up out of the blue, she felt more helpless by the second.
'Jesus...' Colin grumbled as he tried to subdue her, eventually the other man stepped in. He hit her once across the face and stars flashed in front of her eyes, she could already feel her eye beginning to swell. Then she started to sob properly, she was still too loud for them so the man hit her again, this time she felt her lip slice against her teeth and tasted blood.
'Okay come on, let's go.' the other man whispered and Hannah was aware of him holding her, pinning her arms to her sides and clamping a hand over her mouth to shut her up. She tried to kick out at Colin but the drug made her woozy and she knew that she was powerless so she glared, staring him dead in the eye and hoping it would deter him at least a little.
'She's staring at me, I can't when she's staring. Can you put a hand over her eyes or something?' Colin complained and the other man hissed a response that Hannah couldn't make out. She was suddenly hoisted forward and her cheek cracked against the metal of a large bin, the shock sent her reeling and she could feel the spots begin to cloud her vision. She tried her best to fight it but eventually the spots won and she fell unconscious.

.....

Abigail couldn't focus on anything after she'd spoken to Hannah and it just felt wrong for her to be in the pub so she decided the best course of action was to leave. She bumped into Dom and the others and found that Dom and Lofty were also unhappy with the way they'd seen Hannah, they decided it was best to just leave and go home for the night.
'It's weird for Hannah just to leave without saying goodbye.' Dom commented as he held the door open for Lofty, Nicky, Meena and Abigail.
'I think the alcohol went straight to her head, she seemed to stumble a little.' Abigail commented and Dom frowned.
'Are we talking about the same Hannah Hanssen who once drank Fletch under the table without so much as batting an eyelid? The very same who is rivalled only possibly by Serena Campbell?' he asked and Abigail shrugged.
'And she only had one drink?' Lofty asked and Abigail nodded.
'That really doesn't sound like her.' Dom said, his frown deepening.
'Maybe the stress of the day just got to her? Made the alcohol a little bit more effective?' Nicky suggested but Dom was unconvinced. By this point they were walking past the alley and Meena happened to glance down it.
'Hey!' she yelled suddenly and just as suddenly took off at a sprint towards what she had seen. She couldn't see who it was, she could only see two men propping up a girl who was very clearly unconscious and doing something unspeakable to her. By the time the others had registered what Meena had spotted, the men had unceremoniously tossed the girl to the floor and were running in the opposite direction. Dom and Lofty hurried after them in a chase but the others were close behind. They approached the victim and all stopped short for a moment.
'Oh, my God...' Abigail muttered as Nicky dropped to the floor to rearrange Hannah's clothes and protect her modesty.
'Mr Copeland!' Meena called, dropping down beside Nicky.
'We need to get her into the hospital, now.' Nicky remarked, doing her best to put Hannah into the recovery position.
'She's breathing okay.' Meena ascertained, all whilst Abigail stood there, shocked and dumbfounded, unable to help in any way. Her first thought was that this was her fault, she had been the one to encourage Hannah to leave, she had suggested that she go when she did. She should have been able to see if Hannah had been drugged, she should have made sure that she was safe, she should at least have made sure that she had left with someone she could trust.
Dom and Lofty had returned, panting and out of breath, they had been unsuccessful in their chase. Dom dropped down beside Nicky and the realisation hit him when he saw Hannah's face.
'I'll call Mr Hanssen...' Abigail began but Dom held up a hand.
'No, let Hannah tell him about this, right now it wouldn't be fair on either of them for him to see her in this state. They have a very fragile relationship, especially at the moment.' Dom explained, checking Hannah over for any injuries other than those on her face. 'We'll carry her into the ED, it'll be quicker.'
He gently scooped Hannah up into his arms, surprised with how light and small she was. The others led the way and they walked around the hospital towards the ED where Noel looked up from the front desk in surprise.
'Ms Tate...' Noel began but Abigail had regained some of her senses.
'We need to be seen, immediately. We have a twenty-six year old female who has been assaulted and possibly drugged.' she demanded and Dylan Keogh came around the corner at that moment.
'Bring her through here.' he instructed, he hadn't seen who she was. In the meantime, Lofty's old colleagues were giving him funny looks as if unsure whether it was appropriate to speak to him at that moment or not. Lofty, Meena and Nicky were instructed to wait in the waiting area and Abigail went with Hannah and Dom as he carried her through to Resus. As Dom laid her down on the bed pointed out to them, Dylan did a double take.
'Is that Hannah Hanssen?' he asked and Abigail nodded.
'She was attacked outside the pub, we didn't see much and we found her like this.' Dom explained as Dylan set to work. Resus was too crowded so Abigail went back to the waiting area so Dom could stay with Hannah.
'Has someone called Mr Hanssen?' Dylan asked and Dom shook his head.
'We thought it would be best for Hannah to do that herself when she wakes up.' Dom replied and Dylan nodded.
'And the police?' Dylan asked and Dom shook his head. Dylan turned to a nurse and requested the police be called whilst he asked for more information from Dom.
'There were two men, she was being… assaulted when we arrived but they ran away.' he explained, looking down at Hannah and stroking her hand absent-mindedly.
'I'll have a female nurse go through everything with her when she wakes up.' Dylan said softly. 'I can wake her up as soon as her bloods come back and we know what drug she was given.' Dylan sighed. 'Today of all days, eh? As if she hasn’t been through enough.'
Dylan left Dom alone with Hannah and he looked down at her, watching her sleep peacefully and dreading when she woke up.

....

It was two hours before they could wake Hannah up, the awareness in her eyes from the moment she opened them was horrible.
'Hey...' Dom said softly, brushing her hair back from her face which had been stitched up the best it could be.
'Hello Ms Hanssen, how are you feeling?' Dylan asked, shining a light in her eyes to check the responsiveness of her pupils, she blinked a little, disoriented.
'My head hurts, I'm thirsty...' Hannah replied with a croaky voice and a nurse appeared a moment later with a glass of water.
'What do you remember?' Dom asked and Dylan looked down, giving her the illusion of privacy.
'The last thing I remember is talking to Ms Tate.' Hannah replied but there were tears in her eyes and Dom knew that she suspected things even if she didn’t know them for certain.
'I’m sorry to say, Ms Hanssen, you were...' Dylan began but Hannah held up a hand.
'No.' she said sharply and Dylan looked at her, confused. 'I don't want to know.'
'But Hannah...' Dom began but she shook her head quickly.
'I do not want to know, I can go my life without knowing and I do not want to know what happened to me.' she replied, her voice was trembling but it was loud and clear.
'Hannah, you have to talk about this, you have to deal with it head on! You know that better than anyone.' Dom reasoned but she glared at him.
'Don't you dare ever try and tell me what happened to me. I don't want to know, it's better not to know.' she said firmly and Dylan and Dom shared a glance.
'Alright, well the police are here and they will want to talk to you.' Dylan explained but she shook her head again.
'I don't want to speak to any police, nobody. I just want to go home.' she was adamant and Dom knew that she would not change her mind, Dylan was not so knowledgeable.
'You do understand what happened to you?' he asked and she glared at him through the tears in her eyes.
'I want to go home.' she repeated firmly and Dylan sighed before leaving.
'Hannah, please let them help you. I can see if someone else is available? Ms Beauchamp?' Dom suggested and was genuinely a little afraid of the scowl she gave him.
'What, so she can go blabbing to my dad? No. Dom, you have to promise me and make anyone else who saw promise too, you won't tell anybody about what happened. Especially not my dad or... Professor Gaskell.' she said, her voice trembling, and Dom understood her reasoning.
'Alright, I just hope you'll come around to talking about it in your own time.' he said and Hannah shifted uncomfortably.
Dom left her alone to speak to the others and relay her request and Hannah stared at her hands. She couldn't remember a thing, she wasn't sure she wanted to, part of her wanted to know exactly what had happened to her but whenever that part got stronger her desire to repress the pain took over and she didn't want to know all over again. She angrily brushed away an escaped tear and waited for her discharge papers, desperate to bottle up all of the pain, all of the emotion; determined to forget that gap in her memory which would partly define her forever.