Status: Starting over



My breath caught in my throat and I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest. A flash of heat washed over me so quick I couldn’t determine if I was burning hot or freezing cold. All I knew was that if I didn’t remember to breathe in the next ten seconds I was sure to pass out. The cold came over me when the anxiety began building up in my body. It told me to run because he could only bring trouble. My body also reminded me of the heartbreak, it reminded me of everything I’ve been trying so hard to forget. Then a wave of heat washed over me because Brandon was a vampire, I was baffled, and every instinct in me told me to kick his ass.

Angel grabbed my arm from behind me, but I snatched it back from her in anger. I was not going to let him get to me. I wanted answers, and I couldn’t do that in front of her. In the distance, through my confused anger I could hear the bell ring and Angel urging me to come to class. I shook my head and turned to her, with tears in my eyes I told her to go on. I wanted to talk to Brandon alone.

Angel reluctantly went in the classroom, closing the door that was propped open behind her. I was ready to tell Brandon off, for everything he’s done to me, for Brian, for being a vampire. Before I could open my mouth to hurl whatever insult I could think of at him, a head of blond hair bobbed down the hallway behind him.

Trevor smiled in our direction, I was glad to see him, just so I could tell him who Brandon was and we could deal with him together. Yet, I was wrong again, and when Trevor reached us he put his hand on Brandon’s shoulder in a genuine guy like greeting. That heated me up even more, did these two really know each other and were actually friends? I had to have been dreaming, or died and went to hell.

“Shannon, this is Brandon,” Trevor said very cheerily. Oh goodness, that probably meant they were good friends too. Brandon grinned back at me, extending his hand toward me. I really looked at his face for the first time and noticed the changes within it immediately. His dark buzzed hair grew in short curls similar to Brain’s, the golden brown showing through when he turned his head to the side. His eyes were similar to his late brother’s as well, dark brown and sparkling. Just like Brian he had a dark freckle above his lip. Brandon was almost a handsome spitting image of his brother.

Brandon was different than Brian though, his face was slimmer , his jaw more angular, and sharply cut. Brandon stood taller, more lanky and thinner. However, since last seeing him his shoulders had gotten broader and his arms had filled in, giving him a good build. I glanced at his body and noticed the uniform, he’s a student here too?

I shook my head, I would not think about Brandon’s looks, or how similar Brian would look if he were still alive today and standing beside his brother. I cleared my throat and swatted away Brandons hand in front of me, “I know who he is, I want to know how you know him.” I was glad my voice didn’t give out, I sounded just as spiteful and angry as I felt.

That disgusting smirk never left Brandon’s face as his eyes bore into mine. Trevor looked bewildered, shifting his head between us. I wanted to scream, I wanted to yell at Brandon, and I still was fighting the urge to punch him in the face. Before this altercation could get out of control I grabbed Trevor by the wrist, not really wanting to touch Brandon, and lead the two just outside the hallway where the doors to the school were facing the parking lot.

“Speak,” I said to Trevor once we were out of earshot and to the prying eyes of teenagers. I didn’t care if I was being rude or too forward. I deserved some answers, and this time I wasn’t going to care about the feelings of others when I asked them.

Trevor furrowed his brows but hesitantly began answering my previous question, “Brandon and I met through my father recently. He is one of the few who found the witch to help decipher your prophecy.” I groaned. Great, Brandon was in on the whole save the world plan too. But knowing his past motives it would be more like a manipulate everyone involved plan.

I paced in front of the two, trying to control my rage and get my thoughts together. How in the hell did Brandon become a vampire and when? Why was he trying to help me out when that’s the last thing I know he’d do? Most importantly why was he here? If he was a vampire he had no business being in school.

Trevor and Brandon were probably looking at me like I had gone mad, but I didn’t care, I have gone mad! Standing in front of me was a guy who looked exactly like the love of my life, but acted nothing like him. Then beside him was the guy who didn’t tell me that he knew Brandon. I thought Trevor and I were becoming friends, besides the whole ignoring him because of the shock of vampire/prophecy subject. Then he goes on to not let me in on something this important, even if it wasn’t Brandon.

Taking a long deep calming breath I stopped pacing and gathered my thoughts. I turned to Trevor, still not wanting to look Brandon in the eyes, “Brandon is Brian’s twin brother, my ex-boyfriend who died.” Shock registered on Trevor’s face, well I was glad that he probably had no idea who Brandon was to me before today. My suspicions were right once Trevor began whispering to himself as he put his hand to his mouth in deep thought and looked at the ground.

Finally, I turned to Brandon and looked at his deep brown eyes. I could get lost in those eyes they were so similar to Brain’s, but I knew they weren’t his. I knew those eyes held mischief, Brandon was always the rogue one out of the two. He caused mayhem so often his mother sent him to military school after his brother’s death, and now here he was standing in front of me looking smug and annoying the shit out of me.

I snarled and held my anger in, “Tell me everything.” I said to Brandon, but when he didn’t respond and kept that annoying smug look and crooked smirk I knew he wasn’t going to talk. I rolled my eyes and elaborated for him, “How did you change? Why are you here? And how did you convince Trevor to have a role in whatever this is?”

Brandon smiled and leaned on the brick wall of the school. He shrugged and took a long time to answer me. Ugh, I just wanted to wring his neck! He sensed my rage and smirked, “I was turned when I was on my way to military school. I was getting drunk and happy to leave. Before I got on the bus I went to visit Brian, because contrary to what you think Shannon, I am a good brother.” I rolled my eyes again, I highly doubted it. However, Brian wasn’t here to tell me otherwise.

Brandon continued, “I was stumbling in the graveyard and yelling, when Joseph came to me and asked if I would like to help him with something. Drunk me said it was a good idea and to go for it. He told me he needed help finding a girl, I told him I was good at that, of course.” He smiled mischievously, “Before I knew it I was drinking his blood and I woke up like this.” He gestured to himself, waving his hands up and down his body and wiggling his eyebrows. His cockiness actually made me want to gag.

“As for convincing Trevor, I didn't have to do anything. I did what Joseph asked, I found that witch and your little prophecy. When I met Trevor I had suspicions that you were the Shannon he was talking about, but I had no idea if it was true.” Trevor stood there silently, I seriously could not believe he didn’t even say ‘oh I know of a Brandon’ when I told him everything to do with my sordid past.

“Then why are you here?” I inquired, “Trevor’s here to keep close to me as we work through this prophecy before graduation. Don’t give me some bullshit excuse on being here for that, Jonathan and Cameron didn’t come here. And please don’t tell me you came here just to turn my life upside down. You’re a vampire, you don’t need high school to succeed in life, you can compel people to do anything you want.”

Brandon smiled and sat on the bench near the doors, “I only came here to make you upset a little bit. I came here to have fun! Just because I’m a vampire doesn’t mean I don’t need an education. Besides, I couldn’t just tell my mom I don’t need high school.”

Frustration built in my body, people dropout of school all the time. I’m sure his mother would have predicted it would happen anyway. I really didn’t trust Brandon, whatever Joseph made him do or even if Trevor had all his faith in whatever Brandon did for the prophecy. I knew Brandon better than anyone here, he was manipulative and lying, he would do anything to get what he wanted and make people miserable. I was one of the many caught in his cross fire.

“Like it or not Shannon, I’m on your team. I’m helping with the prophecy and I’m going to make sure that the world doesn’t end with supernaturals taking over. The world needs order, and having supernaturals reign on top will just make matters worse.” Brandon said with a serious look on his face. He was right, just like with Trevor and the rest of them, I had to suck it up and face the facts. The key goal here was to keep the supernaturals hidden so the world didn’t implode. After this was all over I definitely needed a spa day, and to get rid of Brandon.

The bell rang, signaling the beginning of second hour. I groaned, I almost forgot we were in school. Kids started piling out of the class rooms and into the hall to make it to their other classes. A few people passed us by and widened their eyes at the sight of Brandon, everyone knew who he was. The twins went here before Brian passed, but no one has heard from Brandon since then.

I knew I had to make it to at least a few classes today and try to forget about this whole Brandon mess. “Fine, do whatever you want. When you’re at school you stay away from me and my friends. I only see you in class and any vampire meetings. Understood?” Brandon nodded with his signature smile that I wanted to wipe off his face.

I turned away from him and Trevor, storming off to class. There were so many emotions running through me. I could feel the fear at the base of my chest, the sadness at the back of my throat, and I was so angry I wanted to cry. Brandon looked so much like his brother that it made my heart skip a beat. It made too many memories resurface, good and bad ones. Mostly the one where he was regrettably my first.

How could Brandon come back into my life so unexpectedly and ruin it so quickly? How could he have not known the prophecy was about me when he was around Trevor and the others so frequently? He must have figured out and thought of a way to get near me. There was no way Joseph got Brandon to do his dirty work and then put him on the forefront with me.

I had to know why Brandon was here, and I needed to find out quick before he caused too much trouble. When Trevor came here I only suspected that he was no good and that I should stay away from him. But I knew Brandon, I knew he was no good, and I knew that I had to stay away from him. But I also knew that I had to find out a way to get him out of here for good.

Throughout classes my friends kept asking questions about Brandon. The ones I hadn’t talked to in weeks told me he was back at school and that I should watch out. I just wanted to scream at them that I knew, but that would have just caused more problems for me. The friends that asked about Brandon I ignored their inquiries, I would deal with it all at lunch. For most of the day during classes I sat in my seat, irritable and angry, glaring at Brandon when he was anywhere near me.

When lunch came around Angel was quiet around me, sensing my irritation and knowing that I didn’t want to talk about the Brandon situation until everyone was there to hear it at once. During classes I had to think of a lie to tell my friends about us regarding vampire situations. I knew we would have to speak to each other if he was in on this whole supernatural-prophecy-war thing. For now I would just have to keep out the part of him and I spending time together, that would have to be a perfectly planned out lie. Something that I was not ready for just yet.

Once everyone got to the table at lunch I was bombarded with questions, including some from Xavier and Gavin. They all asked questions at once, making them cluster together and being unable to seperate them. I groaned and put my head in my hands on the table. How did I think I was able to do any of this?

Jameson was the first to speak up, “Guys! Chill out, let Shay get a moment to think. You guys are bombarding her.” He reached across the table and put his hand on my arm. I smiled at him and mumbled a ‘thank you’. He returned the smile, “Now, Shay Honey, say whatever you have to.” Jameson always knew what to do in a crises, he knew how to calm me down without saying too much of anything.

With the strength of my friends I took a deep breath to calm myself from all the chaos that conjured up throughout the day. “I don’t know why Brandon came back here,” I told them a semi-lie. I knew he was here to help with the whole war thing, but I didn’t know why he was here at school other than to cause trouble and give me a giant headache for the rest of the year. “All I know is that he came back here from military school and that him and Trevor are somehow friends.”

“How in the world did that happen? Did they meet when Brandon was at military school or something?” Emma spoke with her mouth full, as usual.

I shrugged my shoulders, “I guess so. They must have been in the same state when Brandon was at military school. But Trevor knows everything and won’t be bringing Brandon around. I also told Brandon to stay away from us, which I hope he sticks to his word.” Just as we were talking about him Brandon and Rachel pass our table, laughing and talking so loud their conversation carries over to us. As he passed us he gave me a wink and one of his little cocky smiles. I sneered and rolled my eyes, turning to my friends and trying to ignore them.

Angel stared at the two and watched them as they sat at Rachel’s table, “Likely not. It’s Brandon we’re talking about. He’s prone to causing trouble and making people miserable. If I have anything to do with it, if he even looks your direction I’m going to kick his ass out of here.” Xavier and Gavin gave similar threats, I smiled at them. I wouldn’t know what I’d do without them, I’d probably be driven insane.

However, I knew there was nothing they could do outside of school. Outside of school I’d have to be on the same team as Brandon. Or at least pretend that I was. I knew I had to find out as much as I could about him after The Change, and figure out a way to have Joseph release him and get him the hell away from me at all costs. I knew it wouldn’t be easy and I knew that I wouldn’t have my friends there to save my ass. As much as I wanted to tell them everything and have someone to confide in and tell all my troubles to.

As lunch continued my friends tried to get me to ignore Brandon and Rachel making a scene behind us at their table. Still, I couldn’t help but to hear their laughter and loud comments that echoed through the room and traveled to our table. Everytime I heard them it got me more and more upset. Rachel already had Brian, what could she have possibly wanted with Brandon too? I should have ignored it and let her have him, they were perfect for each other anyway. They both enjoyed hurting me.

Despite that, I wasn’t going to just let her get hurt by him like he wanted to hurt me. Maybe I thought for a slight fraction of a second that Rachel deserved it. Nonetheless, my gut feeling told me that I had to do for Rachel what she tried to do for me. I had to tell her that Brandon was no good and that she should stay away from him at all costs. I would tell her and if she didn’t listen it wasn’t up to me after that. At least I would warn her and return the favor of not completely hating each other, even if her warning didn’t do much for me.

When lunch was over we were behind Rachel and Brandon, they were talking loudly and laughing, just as they had been all lunch hour. Goodness, how much could two self centered crazy people talk about? When the boys, including Brandon, turned to go to their own dorms I told the rest of my friends I would catch up with them later. I stood outside, waiting for them to go to their dorms so they wouldn’t see me walking up to Rachel’s door.

Rachel opened the door with her school uniform still on, the skirt hiked up way too high and her shirt untucked. When she saw it was me she looked annoyed and folded her arms across her chest. Looking down at me, with the added height of her heels, she sneered, “What do you want, Matthews?”

I ignored her rudeness and straightened my spine, “I’m doing you a favor, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t act like a total bitch for five minutes.” I pushed her aside with my shoulder gently as I walked in her room so we wouldn’t be seen by anyone in the halls. I didn’t wait for her typical ‘speak’ command to tell her what I was here for. “Look, Brandon is bad news. I’m here to tell you to stay away from him like you did to me with Trevor.”

Rachel scoffed and shifted her weight on one heel so that her other foot was sticking out in front of her and keeping her balance. “Yet, you didn’t listen to me. You’re still hanging around Trevor, it might not be at school but I know everything. It’s not going to be on me when he hurts you like he did to me.”

“You don’t know the full story of it, Rachel. He wasn’t trying to hurt you.” I told her. I couldn’t say that his blood lust couldn’t be controlled with his anger, but I didn’t have any other sensible explanation. So I had to keep my mouth shut. Even if I would enjoy seeing someone drinking a little bit of her blood to shut her up for a moment.

She rolled her eyes, “Yeah, tell him to tell me that. Besides, aren’t you the one who slept with Brandon? He must not be all that awful if you did the nasty with him.”

It’s going to be impossible to reason with this girl. “Yes I did, but he’s still not a good person. He told me to sleep with him so we both could hurt Brian, and look what it did. Brandon’s not the same since he came back, he’s worse. He can seriously hurt you this time, and I don’t just mean by sleeping with you and leaving you to hang high and dry. Just like with Trevor, you don’t have to listen to me, but hear me when I say he is way more than bad news.”

Rachel leaned on the wall, looking at me for a moment before speaking. “I’ll think about it. I don’t know what’s up with you this year, but it’s freaking me out.” I gave her a confused look and tilted my head. Whatever, at least she was going to possibly stay away from him. I did not want a vampire death on my hands.

I nodded my head and left the room, not saying another word to Rachel. Before going to my room I stopped in the hall and thought for a moment, not really wanting to deal with Angel and my other friends at the moment. I thought about the last thing Rachel had said, about me being different.

I didn’t think I was any different than any other year, besides actually coming to confront her about the Brandon situation. I was trying to be a better person, I didn’t know if that’s what she was referring to. Or that I had changed since the loss of my boyfriend and the discovery of vampires and that I was more powerful than I actually thought. If she could see that then everyone else could. I knew I had to start being more careful.


A few days passed since Branon came back to Brighton. Of course he started causing trouble in all his classes. He would speak out, be rude to teachers, and cause all other sorts of mischief. I wasn’t sure if vampire’s had the allure thing that was so popular in mainstream media, but I was sure Brandon had some sort of it. Just like when Trevor came here, Brandon had every girl falling over him and following his every move. Except this was like times ten.

With Trevor it seemed to dissipate within a few days, girls were still hung up over him though. Although, with Brandon it seemed that girls were there to do his every beck and call. He had new dates every hour, and I could hear all the girls talking about him. It felt strange having every girl swoon over him, since most knew about him before he left for military school. Before he was a vampire not many girls liked him, he had the usual bad boy lust. But this was different, this was extreme.

Luckily I was able to stay away from him during school and he ignored me and my friends as well. I knew that wouldn’t be the case during the weekend when training continued and I’d have to be around him and the others the whole time.

After school on Thursday Gavin, Jameson, and I planned a study session in the library. They were doing homework as I was researching on the computer, but I couldn’t concentrate and all I could do was stress about the disaster that was bound to happen this weekend with Brandon. I knew I had to figure out what he was really doing here, and fast before he screwed everything up and not just my school life.

“You’re looking really focused on your work,” Jameson jokes. I forced a laughed and then sighed, closing the tab on the computer that I completely wasn’t paying attention to. I shut off the computer and took out my notebook to try and focus on something else. I laid my head on the table, trying to read whatever notes I took in class. “Okay, what’s going on, Shay?” Jameson asked, closing my books.

I quietly groaned and pushed my hair away from my face. “You know what’s wrong. Brandon’s here, karma is coming back to kick me in the ass. I thought this year was supposed to be great, but it’s just turning into a big pile of crap.” I put my elbow on the table and rested my head in my hand.

Gavin spoke this time, putting his hand on my arm, giving me strength and sincerity. “Shay, karma is not coming for you. It’s not your fault about Brian. He was dealing with stuff before you slept with Brandon. You couldn’t have caused him to do what he did.”

“But I still slept with him, and that was awful of me,” I said. “I might not have caused it but I definitely could have prevented it or prolonged it. I could have even talked to him, but I didn’t. I’m to blame for some of it.” I always had this weight on my shoulders and in my heart that I was to blame for Brian’s death. It was true that he battled depression before, that it wasn’t his first attempt. However, I could have stayed by his side instead of holding a grudge about the whole Rachel thing. I could have not slept with his brother in spite of it all. In the end I always blamed myself. In this story I was the bitch who deserved everything that was now coming for me.

Gavin shook his head, “You can’t continue to only blame yourself, and you can’t start feeling bad just because Brandon is back. That’s exactly what he wants. Brian killed himself because of depression. Yes, what you did was horrible, and you’ll have to live with it your whole life. But you have to forgive yourself, Brian cheated too. He’s to blame too. Everyone played a part in what happened. Don’t put all the fault on yourself.” Jameson nodded in agreement.

I sniffled and thanked my friends. They were right, once Brandon came back it was like all the hurt and pain came back with him. Before he came back I was living with the pain, I was forgiving Rachel. Brandon was just a pest who wanted me to hurt like he knew I would when I slept with him. I would have to live with all the things I had done, but I would also have to forgive myself and do something good to redeem myself. Helping Joseph and the supernaturals was a start, but I know I would need to do more in honor of Brian.

I started to open my books and get back to studying when Jameson shoved my hand away and closed the book again. I furrowed my brows and gave him a look of disbelief. “We’re not done here yet, girl. What’s up with you and Trevor and those other boys you’re hanging out with so much?” I groaned, how could be go from my ex-boyfriend to new vampire boys so quick?

Gavin rolled his eyes and starting looking at his homework in front of him, but I knew him well enough to know that he was only pretending to do his homework. He was trying to sneakily listen in on our conversation, and he wasn’t doing a good job at it.

Groaning again I answered Jameson the best that I could, “There is nothing going on with them. We’re just friends, just hanging out. Trevor really isn’t a bad guy, Rachel didn’t lie about what he did, but hear what he has to say first. Despite everything, including him being friends with Brandon, he’s alright.”

Gavin scoffed, never taking his eyes away from his papers. He really was a jealous guy. He was okay with Brian and I, mostly because they were close friends. However, before and after Brian it was like I was off limits to any guy. They knew that if they hurt me Gavin would kick their ass before they could even think of doing something. He was protective, but he meant well. I just hoped he wasn’t waiting around for me. I wanted Gavin to move on just like I had to.

Jameson rolled his eyes, “Well Emma keeps talking about that Jonathan guy. We’re going to have to meet these friends of yours one day.” Don’t count on it, I told myself. If I could help it I would not want any of my friends to meet Jonathan and Cameron. I knew they were able to keep their vampire lust and what not under control, but I couldn’t take any chances. There would be too much explaining and lying. I had to deal with one thing at a time.

“Besides, if nothing is going on it seems like Trevor is really into you. The other day during class he kept looking at you. I don’t know what you plan to do but you better talk to the kid, before you both get into something. You’ve got to get your shit together.” Jameson said, finally getting back to studying.

I didn’t want to get my shit together, I wish my shit would get itself together on it’s own. I had too much on my plate already, and now Jameson added another. Boy problems. If Trevor was looking at me in class it would have to be because of the whole prophecy thing and when I wasn’t talking to him about it and still comprehending it all. Yet, when he mentions something like that it’s like I can’t help but think what if. Trevor definitely seemed into me before my discovery of vampires, but that could have been all in my head too.

Then Emma was still thinking about Jonathan when I told her that she should just forget about him and leave him alone. I would have to do major damage control on that part. I wonder if the boys could do some of that mind control thing where Emma either forgets about Jonathan or thinks that she wants nothing to do with him. Either way I had to remind the boys to not meet at school, or else I’d have to convince all my friends to stay away.

I didn’t even bother to open my books this time and pretend to study or do homework. I sat there and checked off everything that I had to handle before graduation approached and before I had to deal with the whole war thing. The top of the list was to deal with the whole Brandon situation and figure out why he was really here and back in my life. Then behind that was trying to figure out my powers and learning other supernatural related things, trying to maintain friendships, school, and at the very bottom: boy problems.