The Graveyards We Leave Behind

On their way to the Ark with Nia's body they are almost celebrating - hoping to turn a shaky truce to a wide reaching peace. When they reach another graveyard the hopeful smiles disappear from their faces. Nyx's eyes squint at the corpses with bullets inside them. Who could have done this? Someone from the Ark, but who? Nyx is scared of ghosts, and when a wounded Indra groans it surprises her. There are tears in her eyes. Octavia wouldn't take this well.

"Skaikru has rejected the coalition," her words are bitter like lemon rinds as she clutches her shoulder.

"No, we were so close," Clarke sounds desperate.

"Can you get in touch with Kane?" Nyx won't give up.

Indra looks at the girl. The anger in her eyes is not hidden, but when she sees the tears welling up in Nyx's she can't help but to agree.

Three clicks on the radio and a few minutes later Kane's voice is a whisper on the channel, "Indra?"

Clarke sneaks a look at Lexa, and before they know it the two are sneaking into the Ark through a vent with Octavia leading them. Nyx decides it is not the time to tell her about Indra yet, but she promises that she will.

She could not believe that Pike is their new chancellor. These people know nothing about the ground. The Earth is not the Ark, there is plenty to share. This endless war is pointless. The endless graveyards are haunting. She doesn't know if she can forgive them.

Clarke and Nyx wait in an empty room. The air is quiet between them. When Nyx hears Octavia's voice draw closer she looks to the ground and purses her lips. Then her heart clenches when she hears Bellamy's voice defending his decision to kill the peacekeeping forces.

"Clarke," is what leaves his lips when he walks in, and Nyx grits her teeth.

"Hi, to you too, asshole," she sneers his way.

He ignores her. He always ignores her. She doesn’t know that it is his way of fighting the urge to wrap her up and tell her he loves her. He argues with Clarke, telling her she has no choice in what they do anymore because she is sleeping with the enemy.

"You're not our ambassador, Clarke. You don't even know us. You left us," he accuses her. He is still mad that she left them after Mount Weather.

"Bellamy," she starts, "I'm sorry." Clarke sounds desperate.

Bellamy doesn’t care. "One guard to room 263," he says into the radio before he cuffs both the girls in front of him, gazing into Nyx's eyes for a moment surprised to see them on fire.

It's only a few seconds before Nathan walks into the room. "What are you doing, Miller?" her voice is vicious and makes him stop in his tracks, "Why are you still wearing that goddamn uniform?" she shouts.

"I'm surviving while you're probably fucking grounders out there," he says in reproach.

She's taken aback for a second. She shouldn’t be surprised. He knows sex is like water to her - she needs it to survive. He didn't need it though. How dare he shame her when she is sure he fucks Bryan nightly.

"Yea, and where's Bryan when he's not sucking your cock?" She spits back in provocation. It triggers something inside him even though she doesn’t know it. Miller is only with Pike to get information, but Bryan's belief in the cause makes it hard for Nathan to love him.

Before he has a chance to respond Octavia has knocked him out. Clarke grabs Bellamy's baton, shocking him to the ground. Nyx's heart strings tug when she sees him collapse, but when her eyes fall on his uniform she shakes her head and runs after Clarke back through the vents and then the woods to Polis. She doesn't care that Lexa is waiting. Clarke will run to her.

She doesn't know how long it takes. Her legs are burning. Her lungs are burning. She won't stop. She doesn't let her feet slow down until she is at the gates. She catches her breath as she strolls through the marketplace. When she gets to the tower she doesn’t take the lift, instead she climbs 25 levels, her legs shaking, to reach the King's chambers only to find the same girl whispering to him.

"Nyx," her name rolls off his tongue in a sigh of relief when his eyes land on her. It's the first time she hears him say it, so she smiles at him in response.

Roan walks over to kiss her when the girl leaves. It is a hungry kiss, but she swears she can feel love too.

"Who is she?" Nyx asks about the woman when he lets her have a chance to breath. She is about to collapse on the chair in exhaustion, but Roan's words stop her.

"Echo? She's a spy," he says, letting her go to pour her a glass of water.

Her body lights up with rage, "Echo? She killed all those people in the mountain." The name is familiar to her from the summit.

"She didn't kill them," Roan responds, handing her the cup.

"She lied to Bellamy to draw him out of there so he couldn’t save them. She killed them, Roan, and I'm going to kill her," she retorts back in disbelief of his defense.

"Drink," he responds, attempting to hand her the cup again.

"You know I don’t want that," she states, reaching for the bottle of wine instead.

"You're going to drink yourself to death," he accuses her.

"I've been told so many times and look, I'm still here," she is snarky.

When she ignores him and brings the bottle to her lips he sighs and says, "when Echo's time comes, she will die."

"Em gonplei ste odon," she warns Roan with every intent to go after the girl immediately.

"It's been days since I've seen you, maybe we talk about something else," Roan suggests. He does not like seeing the emptiness in her eyes, or hearing the threats from her lips.

"I don’t talk, Roan," she says.

"You talked plenty when you thought I was going to die," he reminds her. "Even before that," he starts as he wraps his arms around her. "Chit souda ai dula op yu tie ai op," his voice is lighthearted as he recalls her first words to him asking what she would have to do for him to tie her up.

"Roan," she sighs, fighting his grasp. She cannot sit back when she knows the spy is the one who created more hollow bodies by destroying their souls. It is her fault Skaikru broke the coalition and elected Pike as chancellor.

"I missed you," he whispers in her ear, and she stops.

When she looks into his eyes the world melts away. There is no Echo, no Bellamy. Her lips find his in hunger, and before she knows it they are naked in his bed, and he is thrusting into her lacing her neck with sweltering kisses. She listens to his heavy breaths in her ear, her nails digging into his back. Her legs are wrapped around his waist, and a moan escapes her every time she feels him push his himself in.

They are lost in a new world, but they are together and happy. The grunts that befall her ears are erotic, and her gasps are like a song to his. She wishes this moment could last forever, but when he squeezes her body closer she overflows with desire, and stars fill her eyes. She feels his body fall next to her, realizing he filled her this time. It is the first time in her life that she has allowed it, and she throws her arm across his chest, listening to his heavy breaths in a sweet surrender.

"I missed you too," she tells him looking up at his handsome face.

He returns the gaze, exploring her eyes with his own. He leans down to place a kiss on her lips before he says, "you look better."

Nyx knows he is referring to the fact that the world is no longer dull when she looks at it. She recalls promising that she would tell him how emptiness became her, but she decides that this moment is too precious to ruin.

When they hear a horn blow in the distance she gets up and dresses, pulling the ragged tank top over her shoulders, not failing to notice that the blue has faded from her body. Roan promises to find her some new clothes later as they head to the top of the tower for the meeting.

In the temple there is a body on the table draped with a cloth, and Clarke is on her knees crying. Out of the corner of her eye she spots, "John?"

He gives her a small smile, eyeing the scar on her shoulder that has healed nicely since he last saw her. Roan follows her gaze, slightly jealous at the way her voice sounds when she says the boy's name.

"What happened?" Nyx asks. Her brows are so deeply furrowed she feels as if they are touching.

"Lexa is dead. The conclave will be held tomorrow," the flamekeeper says.

"Who killed her?" Nyx asks, noticing Ontari lingering in the shadows. When there is no answer to her question Nyx turns to leave, allowing Clarke to mourn in peace.

Nyx walks through the marketplace, stumbling upon a women selling meat. She feels a hunger in her belly, but decides her trades are better spent on liquor. Before she can walk away Roan is at her side again, buying them each a piece.

"You're playing with fire," she tells him, devouring the meat like a starving child. She is unsure how many days its been since she's eaten anything. Though the rat is tough and earthy, she bites into it gratefully.

"You need to eat," he tells her. There is a worry in his voice that he doesn’t try to hide.

"You should stay away. It doesn’t look good for the Azgeda king to solicit the company of Skaikru," she tells him.

"No one knows anything," he tells her, "and I am not worried about what they think they see."

"Perhaps you should be," Echo's voice resounds through the air as she brushes past them and walks away.

Nyx tries to keep her cool. She feels that she owes it to Roan not to start a war in the capital. She distracts herself by approaching the woman who sold them the bottle a week ago. She takes out some coin from her pocket and exchanges it for another bottle.

"I thought we talked about that," Roan says watching her take a gulp.

"You talked about it, and I listened," she responds, unwilling to compromise. Roan says nothing.

"You know Ontari can't win the conclave tomorrow," she says to him as they walk back toward the tower. She is scared for the first time since she was a child that would be ripped away from someone she loves.

"She won't. If the other nightbloods are anything like Lexa, one of them will triumph. They've been training for it since they could hold a sword," he reassures, taking the last bite of meat off his skewer. Just then the victory horn sounds, and Nyx looks to Roan with panic in her eyes.

"That's not possible - the conclave is in the morning," she says. Her voice is frantic and her eyes look as if she'd just seen a ghost. Ascending the tower to the throne room they find Ontari soaked in blood, Aeden's head in her grasp.

"You killed them while there were sleeping," the flamekeeper accuses.

"They are dead, and I am not," Ontari argues, "how does not matter."

Roan pushes Nyx out of the room, taking the lift down to the ground. "You and your people have to leave. I've done all I can to protect you," his words are quick and cautioning.

Nyx hears the panic he attempts to suppress but is still angry, "you are the one that got attached first, Roan. I told you sex is sex, but you insisted that it had to be more. So here I am, and now you tell me I can never be beside you because I am Skaikru? They would kill the King's loved one just because she's Skaikru? Your people say we are traitors, but who is the traitor now?"

He doesn’t say anything as he searches for Clarke. Nyx follows, spotting her at the market with Murphy. When Roan tells them what's happened Clarke is furious.

"I have to go back to the Ark. Lincoln will help me find Luna, and we can give her the flame," she says. There is an inkling of hope in her voice that she refuses to let go of.

"Luna left a coward. She will never be commander," Roan says before walking away and leaving them alone. In the back of his mind he is screaming at himself. He should take Nyx and run. They can get far away - live in peace. He shakes he head at thought. He is a king. Kings don't run.

"Nyx," Clarke warns, "we have to get the flame."

"We don’t have to do anything. I don’t owe anybody anything. The people left at the Ark are no longer my people," she says, still bitter that they voted for Pike. Clarke walks away, taking Murphy with her. Maybe Nyx is the only traitor in Polis, but she would not fight for something she does not believe in, and she would not run because she is not a coward - she does not fear death because she has nothing to lose.