If It Gave Us Time

Running a brush through her hair, Isla kept her stare on the mirror in front of her, her mind whirring. She knew that she had been quiet, since she had gotten home from her appointment at the bridal boutique, she had barely said two words which weren’t coaxed out of her by Gerard and his cheerful persistence, but she knew that it was only a matter of time before he noticed, even if he had spent most of the afternoon distracted by Maddie. She knew that, as soon as the little girl was down for the night, he’d start to catch onto the fact that there was something on her mind.

Settling the brush down onto the bathroom counter, she moved to gather her blonde hair up into a messy bun before she jumped, feeling something touch her stomach. Blinking a couple of times, she spared a brief glance downwards before she shook her head, a soft smile tugging the corners of her lips upwards. “Weren’t you busy somewhere else in the house?” she asked, lifting her hands to adjust her hair a little more.

Gerard, who’d stepped up behind her, dipped his head, pressing a soft kiss against the bare skin of her shoulder which was left exposed by the vest top that she wore. “I finished” he muttered.

Isla laughed softly. “And you thought you’d come and bother me?” she asked.

Gerard grinned against her skin. “You love spending time with me” he quipped.

Isla rolled her eyes playfully before she stepped away from him, collecting her toothbrush from its spot in the holder.

Gerard watched her for a few moments, the sound of her brushing her teeth the only sound that passed between the two of them, before he sighed, shifting his feet slightly. “You know” he muttered “I really thought when you got back from your wedding dress fitting, I’d have a hard time trying to shut you up. I thought I’d spend the afternoon listening to you talk about the lace or the length or the cut, but you’ve hardly said a word” he added.

Isla stayed quiet, stopping brushing her teeth only to lean over and spit into the sink.

“Was the dress wrong?” Gerard asked “I mean, I know how much of a perfectionist you can be. Did it not live up to your expectations or something?” he pressed, trying his hardest to keep his frustration out of his voice.

Isla shook her head. “The dress was fine” she said softly “It’s really beautiful. It made my mama speechless for once in her life” she added, a faint smile passing over her lips.

Gerard quirked a small smile before he stepped closer to her again, his arms once more settling around her waist. “Then what is the problem?” he asked, pressing a soft kiss against the spot where her neck and shoulder met. He knew that there was something, despite her smiling at all of the right moments and the chirpiness in her voice when they’d spoken, he knew she had something on her mind, and he wanted to coax it out of her, not wanting whatever it was to fester.

Isla closed her eyes at his touch, briefly contemplating asking him what he meant, before she let out a little sigh. “It felt real” she murmured gently.

Gerard propped his head up on her shoulder, a soft frown playing on his lips. “What does that mean?” he asked.

Isla blinked her eyes open, meeting his stare via the mirror. “It means I got scared” she admitted, her voice a little above a whisper.

Gerard’s frown deepened. “Lala...”

“It felt real” Isla interrupted quietly “I was stood there, in my wedding dress, with my engagement ring on my finger and my glasses in the pocket of my jeans because I’m worried about having smudged lenses in our wedding pictures. Can you believe that?” she asked.

“That you’re worried about our wedding pictures?” Gerard asked confusedly.

“That I am worried about wearing my glasses” Isla clarified “I’ve had them on in every picture that’s been taken of me since I was a child, and all of a sudden...” she trailed off, shrugging her shoulders as she struggled to find the words.

Gerard squeezed her waist, but didn’t say anything, allowing her to keep talking.

“It just...I don’t know” Isla babbled “For a moment, when I staring at my reflection, I felt...overwhelmed” she stumbled out.

Gerard dipped his head, kissing her shoulder softly. “OK” he murmured.

“OK?” Ava asked.

Gerard, who’d been dusting her skin with light kisses, nodded his head before he looked up at the mirror again to catch her eyes. “It felt real” he noted “I get that” he added.

Isla closed her eyes, smiling ruefully. “I always wear my glasses” she mumbled “It’s never been a problem before, but all of a sudden, it feels like the biggest deal in the world. I, for some reason, feel like if I wear them, then I am not going to look perfect in the pictures. Like I don’t quite fit next to you” she added.

Gerard breathed out slowly before he leant down, kissing her shoulder a few times before he spoke. “I like your glasses” he noted “And I don’t care if you do or don’t want to wear them in the pictures, either way, you’re going to be beautiful, but you really don’t need to worry about looking like you fit next to me, because you do fit, Isla. That’s what all this is about in the first place” he added as he dropped a hand down towards hers, his fingertip tracing the line of her engagement ring.

Isla took his hand, gently twining their fingers together. “We’re really doing this” she murmured after a few seconds of quiet “I think that that is what hit me. I know we’ve made a lot of plans, but actually putting that dress on...seeing myself like that...seeing my mother cry...” she breathed out a soft, awed, laugh.

“Your mother cried?” Gerard pressed, gently tugging on her hand so that she turned to look up at him.

Isla nodded. “She tried to hide it” she noted “But there were definitely tears in her eyes. She thinks you’re going to melt” she added.

“There’s no doubt in my mind that that is true” Gerard replied “I mean, I kind of melt a little whenever you smile at me” he added boyishly.

Isla couldn’t stifle her laugh. “You’re such a dork” she squeaked.

“I know I am” Gerard quipped “But I made you laugh, no? That’s what I was aiming for” he added, gently bumping her glasses back up her nose.

Isla shook her head, but didn’t say anything, affording Gerard the chance to lean down, brushing a soft kiss over her lips. “It feels real now” he murmured between little kisses “And that’s a little scary. I know I am kind of dreading my suit fitting next week” he added.

“Really?” Isla asked.

“I’ll have a wedding suit, Isla” Gerard replied “An actual suit that I will wear when I marry you. The idea of there being something tangible is...it’s a little scary, but it’s a good kind of scary. More butterflies in my stomach rather than a cold sweat” he explained.

Isla’s face lit up with a slow, soft smile, something which made Gerard smile back at her before he tugged her into a soft hug, kissing the top of her head gently. “It’s going to be great” he mumbled into her hair “Who cares about your messy glasses or whether my suit jacket is a fraction too big? We could sit here and worry about a million things, but we shouldn’t. It’s the getting married that matters, not some pictures” he added gently.

Isla nodded against him, hugging him tightly as the little knot of worry that had been in her stomach loosened slightly.