Finding Home

Clarissa Belle walked up her street, iPod in hand. According to her, there was no point in going home after school. Her mother hater her it seemed, and her father was never home.

“Wishing upon a star, that I could find you…” Clarissa sang underneath her breath. She stopped in front of her house and sighed.

I can’t believe I’m still here. Clarissa thought and sighed again. She walked up the steps, took a deep breath and walked in her front door.

“What the hell has taken you so damn long to get here?” Clarissa’s mother screamed from her bedroom.

“Well, I missed my bus and had to walk home.” Clarissa lied.

“Forgetful fool that you are, I’m not surprised. Now I’m hungry. Make me something to good to eat. Now!” Clarissa’s mother yelled the last word and had Clarissa running to the kitchen. “Hurry!” Clarissa winced and walked to the refrigerator. She opened it up and took out two eggs, milk and her secret ingredient. She brought them out onto the island and went to the pantry. She got the brownie mix out and then went to a cupboard to get out a mixing bowl and a polish pottery baking pan. She made up the brownie mixture and poured it into the pan. She shoved it all into the oven and set the timer to ding in thirty-five minutes. She then went to the freezer and opened it up. She took out a pre-cooked brownie and zapped it in the microwave. She put whipped cream and berries onto the pre-cooked brownie and got a fork out. She took the whole thing to her mother.

“Where in this damn hell is my something good to eat?” Her mother screamed. Clarissa jumped, for she was in her mothers doorway when she had screamed.

“Right here.” Clarissa said and handed her mother the brownie. “Freshly baked.” Clarissa said nervously. She waited to be dismissed but her mother said nothing as she took a bite. Her mother looked up and fear took over Clarissa.

“Well? You have chores to do! Get going!”

“Yes ma’am!” Clarissa yelped and rushed out of the room. She went to her room and plopped down into a bean bag. She looked at the clock and groaned. She had a full 4 hours before she could go to bed and end the day.

'Guess what? Your nothing but a boy. A boy who catches my attention.'

“Yellow?” Clarissa answered her cell phone.

“Hey! Can you maybe escape and come down to the café to join me?”

“Maybe. Hang on. Let me go see.” Clarissa said and put the phone on hold and set it on her dresser. She silently walked out of her room and down the hall to her mothers room. Her mother was eating the brownie and watching t.v.

She’d finish the brownie, put the plate on the side table for me to clean up later and fall asleep for a couple of hours.Clarissa predicted. She watched as her mother set the plate on the side table and snuggled deeper into the covers. I think it’s safe if I sneak out of here.
Clarissa silently went back to her room and picked the phone up. She got off hold.

“Yeah, I can come. Meet ya in ten minutes.” Clarissa said and hung up the phone. She shoved 10 bucks into her back pocket and checked to make sure she still had her iPod. She looked outside her doorway and then silently walked out of her room, past her mothers and right out the front door without a sound. She was good at that, sneaking in and out without a sound, without being noticed.

Clarissa put her headphones in and blasted her music. It wouldn't’t take her that long to get to the little café but at least she could get two songs in before the music had to go off.

She arrived at the café and stopped outside examining it. She usually did this when she came. Sort of a ritual for her. It had a homey look and Clarissa felt a twinge of jealousy. She didn't’t have a place to call home. She slowly opened the door and the scent of fresh bakery and the sound of people talking filled her senses. She walked in and instead of waiting for a waitress to serve her, she served herself and paid for it. It was just faster that way.
Blake slowly turned around when he heard the door open. He knew Clarissa thought of herself as invisible but not to him. Never to him. All his senses knew she was there. He thought of her as beautiful and mesmerizing, though she would never know that. All he wanted to do was scoop her up, take her home and take care of her. Give her a home, give her a better bringing up then her parents had ever given her. Blake had fallen in love with her since they had first met, since he had first seen her. But, of course how these love stories go, she was clueless. Blake watched her walk up and get what she wanted and pay for it. He watched her turn around, scan the café and when those beautiful deep blue. Thoughtful eyes landed on him his heart skipped a beat and she made her way towards their usual table. Blake cleared his throat before she sat down.

“Hey Blake.” Clarissa said and smiled at him.

“Hey Claire! How are you doing today?” He was surprised he had managed her name, let alone two sentences!

“Fine.” She took a bite of her crème puff and sighed. “Actually… I’m not okay.” She took another bite of the crème puff.

“Why? What happened?” Blake asker her instantly fearing she had been bruised up.

“My mother. She thinks so little of me, yet expects so much!” A single tear slid down her cheek. “ I don’t know what to do anymore. Should I leave? Should I stay?” All the tears that she had avoided and saved all those years spilled over her cheeks. Blake was speechless for a second for he had never seen her cry. Not unless she was really in pain or happy crying. The one who had been strong all those years, the one that kept him together was falling apart. Blake racked his brain to find something to say.

“Shh. Sh…” Blake said. Brilliant thing to say Blake. He thought and looked at Clarissa. Blake put his hand over hers and they both felt a jolt. Blake kept his hand where it was.

“Don’t. Don’t even think that!” Blake said already knowing what she wanted to say, and what she was going to say.

“But it’s like I don’t matter, don’t even exist. They need me and poof, I am born.” Clarissa shook her head and looked down.

“Don’t even think that Clarissa. Or say it.” Blake noticed that his voice had gone hard and tried to change it back to the comforting tone he had been using earlier.

“Sometimes, I think it’s true.” Clarissa said quietly.

“Clarissa. Don’t. For me… please.” Clarissa caught the need, but not the meaning. She looked up into his eyes and saw the pain. But it wasn't’t his pain. It was her pain that he was feeling. Blake knew what he had meant and hoped she caught it. But when she said okay a piece of his heart broke.

Blake Mindane was losing hope in ever winning Clarissa Belle’s heart.

Blake took Clarissa for a walk after she finished her little meal.

“Look. I’ve made my mind up. I’m leaving tomorrow. After graduation.” Clarissa said and looked into his eyes. She saw the pain, the shock and the confusion.

“What? Let me come with-“ Clarissa didn’t let him finish.

“No. I need to do this on my own. Blake I-“ Clarissa didn’t get a chance to finish either.

‘Whore! Slut! Where’s my damn dinner!” Clarissa’s mother cried and Clarissa shuddered.

“See you tomorrow.” Blake said hollowly and watched Clarissa walk up her front steps. A single tear slid down his cheek.