Miles to Go

“Is this how you help her adjust, Seth? You desert her?”
I rolled my eyes. Hadn’t I just stepped in the house? “Like she cares, Mom.”
“I don’t care if she cares, Seth! I care.”
I ran a hand through my hair, considered my options carefully, then simply said, “Good thing you’re not her then, isn’t it?”
Her eyebrows rose as her eyes widened. “Clearly you’ve been hanging out with her too much.”
My brow furrowed. “You’re comparing me to her, really?”
“Well, if you talk like her, obviously I’m going to compare you to her.” She sighed, closing up and lightly touching her hair. “Go talk to her, please. Convince her to unpack.”
“Actually, since I’m so like her, I was thinking of going and packing up my things, too,” I snapped, heading towards the stairs. “By the way, not that you care or anything, I made the soccer team. We have practice every day after school. Looks like Rylie’s going to have to find some other chauffeur.”
I heard her huff from behind me and felt bad for a moment before squaring my shoulders and shaking my head. No, feeling bad was out of the question. Remember where you stand, Seth, I thought, going towards my room.
But even as I thought the words again, I paused on the other side of Rylie’s door and stood staring.
Screw where I stand.
I knocked on the door once, just for the sake of being polite before barging in. “Get up,” I instructed, glancing at her sprawled out on her bed.
“Why?”
“Because you’re unpacking.”
She sat up and reached across the bedside table beside her bed for her pack of cigarettes. “I don’t think so.”
“No, I don’t think so.” I stormed over, grabbing the cigarettes out of her hand and tossing them in the trash after crushing the box in my hand. “Keep the lighter, I don’t care. But you’re unpacking.”
She smiled that sarcastic smile of hers as her eyes roamed across the room. “Why don’t you start?”
I rolled my eyes, grabbing the closest box near me. When I opened it, I was surprised to find our mom’s winter clothes inside. “What…?”
“I don’t think you realize I don’t have anything. All this is your shit.”
I gaped at her, searching for words.
“So, looks like I’m unpacked. See your way out.”
I grunted, my impatience flaring as I stalked out of the room.
It was almost funny, the mood she managed to put me in. Ridiculous, absolutely. But almost funny as well. It must have been the lack of emotion, the complete and total control she had over herself.
She was just so unbelievable. She could’ve been wittily sarcastic, had she any feeling in the words she spoke, but her words reflected her personality perfectly: bland.
Rylie Miles was nothing but an unbearable presence, and I was done with it.

The weekend couldn’t approach too soon after that. It took forever, but when it finally arrived, it was like a breath of fresh air, like I’d been drowning in the ocean that was practically my backyard the entire time.
On my way to the door, I plucked the keys off my dresser and jogged down the stairs, grabbing my jacket from the closet.
“You’re going out?”
“I told you this three days ago, Mom,” I muttered. “Bye, dad.”
“Seth,” he called. “Hold on a second. Don’t talk to your mom like that.”
Was everyone in this family a cliché? “Maybe I wouldn’t, if her entire life didn’t revolve around Rylie.”
“Seth.”
“Dad. I’m going to be late.”
“Take your sister with you.”
“Are you crazy?” I asked point blank.
“You either take her with you, or you’re not going out,” he said adamantly.
“Dad!”
“Next time watch the way you talk to and about your mother.”
Jaw clenched, I scoffed. “What, just because one kid is miserable the other has to be too? Screw that.”
“Seth! You step out of this house and you—”
“I don’t care,” I said, shaking my head. “Whatever you do to me can’t be worse than hanging out with Rylie.”
Before he could respond, I stepped out of the house, slamming the door shut behind me. And when I got to my car and glanced at the house, I was surprised to see Rylie staring down at me from her window.
If I didn’t know her the way I did, I might’ve actually worried I’d hurt her feelings.

“Yo, Seth, what’s going on? You seem out of it,” Brent, captain of the soccer team, said, his arm around his girlfriend, a cute brunet.
I looked up from my still half full plate, frowning. “Hm? No, nothing. Just…” I shrugged. “You know how it is,” I said, just because it was what people said when they didn’t know what else to say and they wanted the other person to just nod and drop it already.
And, predictably, Brent nodded and took a big bite of the burger he was eating, and dropped it.
“I don’t,” the brunet said softly, glancing between me and Brent. “You messed up with someone, didn’t you?”
My brow furrowed and I resisted the urge to scowl. Was she for real? “No, I didn’t.”
She shrugged. “If you say so. You boys are just so predictable.” She grinned, kissing Brent’s cheek.
He sent me a look, one I couldn’t decipher if I tried, but nodded anyway.
I brooded at my burger for a minute, two. Then I got to my feet and, excusing myself for a minute, stepped outside, cell phone in hand.
She picked up on the third ring. “Hello.”
Even on the phone she couldn’t have enough emotion to try and make it sound a question. Go figure. “Listen, about what I said—”
“What did you say?” she asked, making me grind my teeth.
“If you heard what I said, I’m sorry,” I bit out. “It was… unnecessary.”
I could imagine her rolling her eyes as she said, “Haven’t you learned anything from me? If you’re going to say something, have the balls to stick by it.”
And then there was silence, the kind of silence when you just knew the person you were talking to had hung up.
Should’ve remembered where I stood.
I sighed, locking my phone and tucking it back in my pocket as I turned to the restaurant. And how hysterical was it that right that moment, as I looked in the window, I saw Brent lean down and pressing his lips against his laughing girlfriend’s. Just like that, I was the odd one out yet again.
And after years of it, I was still surprised.
Unbelievable.

“What’s going on with you and Rylie?”
I stared blankly at my dad who, relaxed and comfortable, sat before me in his sweats with his upper body leaning towards me, elbows on his knees.
Deciding to play stupid was the best way to go about it, I said, “What are you talking about?”
He stared at me contemplatively before nodding. “Alright. Your mom tells me you think she’s on drugs?”
I snorted, unable to help myself as I slouched in my seat. “Have you looked at her? She screams ‘druggie.’”
His lips tightened in a thin line as he looked past my shoulder at the blank TV that was the focal point of our living room. “Is it the move, Seth? Is that why you’re lashing out like this? Making life so much more difficult for me and your mother?”
I thought back to the first day here, to Rylie’s ever present attitude and frowned. I was lashing out because of her. Was it possible that, to some extent, she was doing the same because of me?
I was brought to by my dad speaking again. “You’ve always been the good one, Seth. The reliable one that we could count on. What changed?”
“My life. God, did it occur to you that maybe I’m tired of being the good one that’s ignored because, hey, you’ve got a screwed up child to take care of first?” I scoffed. “It’s not like she has a disease and needs your sympathy, dad. She’s just got a major attitude problem, and it’s your entire fault. Maybe if you hadn’t let it get this far, you wouldn’t have such a colossal problem on your hands.”
“We’re sorry we made you uplift your life on such short notice, Seth, but—”
I laughed; I couldn’t help it. I tried not to, but… “On such short notice? Really, dad? Because, honestly, I think you should be sorry for making me uproot my life at all.”
Hearing ghostly laughter, I looked to the staircase, frowning when I saw Rylie coming down, her excuse of a smile in place. “Clever, Sethie.”
I flinched at the family nickname, glaring at her as I retorted, “Isn’t it, Rile?”
Her “smile” widened slightly as she drifted into the kitchen.
“Rylie,” dad called, “Maybe you should come join the conversation.”
“Maybe,” she agreed from the kitchen, and while we waited, all we heard was silence.
When I looked over and saw him sitting expectantly, I said, “I don’t think she’s coming.”
“I know,” he sighed, “but I was hoping.”
“Stupid thing to do when Rylie’s involved.”
He frowned at me, glancing at the wall behind which was Rylie. “Go to your room, Seth.”
I rolled my eyes as I got to my feet. Just once, I wished I could actually be acknowledged instead of being dismissed.
Just for once.
But that was probably too much to ask.

I stood in front of the mirror, fidgeting with my tie for a moment before going to my bed and picking up my suit jacket, slipping my arms through the sleeves carefully, and leaving the buttons undone.
As I jogged down the steps, gently patting my lightly gelled hair, I glanced into the living room, almost missing the step as my eyes landed on Rylie. Quickly gaining my bearings, I looked to my mother and asked, “Are you sure we’re supposed to be so dressed up?”
“She said formal wear,” my mother replied and I scoffed, knowing her formal was everyone else’s overly formal.
I nodded, glancing at Rylie again. She looked bored out of her mind as usual, but dressed up, it wasn’t as bad, since her clothes made up for all her face lacked. She looked… alive.
And, for a minute, I was almost proud to be her brother.
But then, in typical Rylie behavior, she popped her gum, and I was reminded of who she was.
“Can I meet you guys at the party?” I asked, shuffling my feet.
“Okay,” my mother agreed suspiciously, “but if you don’t show—”
“It’s next door, mom. I’ll be there.”
She nodded, taking Rylie’s arm and dragging her out the front door as my dad nodded goodbye and followed them out.
Once they had left, I made my way to the window and looked out into the neighbor’s house, grinning when I saw that I’d been right—their formal was nothing compared to my mother’s.
I quickly shrugged out of the jacket. Draping it over a chair as I loosened my tie, I undid the first few buttons of my starch white shirt, rolled up my sleeves, and kicked off my shoes. In their place, I put on black and white high tops, not caring if it was fashionable or not.
Once I’d tied the shoes, I stepped out of the house and crossed into the neighbor’s yard.
When I got to the front door, the first thing I noticed was the noise and the music, which was nothing like what I was used to—none of that boring, stiff jazzy stuff I couldn’t stand. The second thing I noticed was that the door had been left open, something no one in their right mind would’ve done back in Pennsylvania.
Oddly enough, I was actually sort of looking forward to—
I held back a curse as I was grabbed the minute I stepped into the house. Dropping my gaze to my shoulder, I looked at my mother, surprised.
She was talking to the owner of the house, Lisa I think her name was, not even looking at me.
I shifted in her grip until she let go, only then actually bothering to pay even the slightest attention to what she was saying.
“...and Rylie are handling this move so well, you wouldn’t believe it.”
My shoulders shook with silent laughter even as I felt my anger steadily rise. Of course she’d still keep up pretenses, telling everyone about how she had the perfect children, the prefect husband, the prefect life.
Didn’t she realize no one believed a word she said but her?
“Anyway, where’s your son?”
“Oh, he isn’t into these types of things,” Lisa answered quickly, shaking her head. “I think he’s in his room, but he might’ve gone out with friends. He’s a very responsible kid.” Lisa smiled, looking over at me. “You must be Seth.”
“Must be,” I answered, smiling to make the words seem less rude as I uncomfortably stuck my hands in my pockets. “I’m going to go find my sister,” I lied, “Excuse me.”
Before either ladies could protest, I ducked into the nearest crowd, accidently bumping into a petite strawberry blonde.
“I’m so—”
“There you are!” she exclaimed, interrupting me as she slid her arm through mine and pulled me in a different direction. She carelessly tossed a glance behind her shoulder as I stared down at her in confusion and, still not looking at me, murmured, “You’re Seth, right?”
“Yeah…” I answered slowly. “Do I know you?”
“No, but you will. I’m Charlotte. And I’m not stalking you or anything, promise. It’s just… you’re the new kid. Everyone knows you, and your sister.”
“Right,” I said slowly, “I—”
She glanced behind her shoulder again and let go, grinning widely at me like I’d just helped her get away with murder (which I probably would have, if she asked,) and hugged me. “Sorry about that, this girl I'm no longer friends with was there, and…” She made a face. “But thanks for your help! People are wrong about you, you know.” Without waiting for an answer, she turned away.
“Wait!” I called after her, watching helplessly as she quickly pushed into a crowd.
For the rest of the night, I was sure I kept seeing strawberry blond hair paired with a navy blue dress from the corner of my eye, but I knew I was hallucinating since she was never there when I looked.