Almost Easy

Liz’s POV

My mouth felt like the Sahara, like I hadn’t touched water in centuries. I blinked my eyes a few times and sat up, groaning at the pain in my stomach. It wasn’t a nauseas feeling but an actual pain. I looked around and realized I was sitting in the basin of the tub in our master bathroom.

My frantic motions of looking around managed to knock over a few shampoo bottles and catch Matt’s attention from his spot sitting beside the tub on the floor where he was half asleep, “Liz, oh Liz you’re up.” He spun around, kneeling beside the tub and grabbing for my face, “Jesus you’ve been in and out of sleeping for like two days.”

“Wait, what?” I asked, “How?”

“Uhm, well one of our friends came over and tested your blood apparently you had a shit ton of cocaine in your system along with some other weird date rape type drugs.” Matt lowered his voice, “Where even were you? Jimmy said you didn’t really leave his sight all night except a couple times..”

“With Gena.” I whispered, “I know that.”

“What were you thinking, Liz?” Matt rubbed his face, he looked a mix between exhaustion and exasperation, “You could have really got yourself in trouble… Did you think of that?”

“Of course I did.” I looked down, noticing I was covered in dried vomit and what looked like shampoo, “Uhm..”

“Yeah, you barfed on yourself a few times in bed so I put you in here, then you tried cleaning it up with shampoo.” Matt gestured to my body, “Come on, I’ll take your clothes. Get cleaned up.”

I nodded, feeling slightly like a scolded child and very much so embarrassed. I started by pulling my bra off from under my dress then slid that down past my feet. I tossed them over the edge of the tub as Matt turned the water on for me, nice and hot. I sighed and undid my hair from the messy bun it was in, “Did you put my hair up?” I asked Matt as he collected my clothes from the floor and put them in the laundry bin.

“Yeah, so you would stop puking in it.” He laughed a little and sat at the edge of the tub, “Listen, Liz. There’s a lot of shit going on with both of us right now… We aren’t in a good spot, any one can see that. Maybe we just need… Maybe we just need a break.”

“A break?” I asked as the water rose up to my stomach, I reached and grabbed for a bottle of body wash and dumped it in to create bubbles, “Like…”

“We should separate for a little bit.”

The pit of my stomach dropped nearly out my feet as the words left Matt’s mouth, but somehow I found myself nodding to his words. He was instinctively rubbing the back of his neck, “Oh… Ok. Alright.”

“You’re staying here, obviously. I’m actually gonna spend some time out at my sisters new place in Seattle.”

“Washington?” My mouth dropped, he nodded, “Matt please you don’t have to leave… I’ll go and stay at Zack’s, it’ll be fine… You’re going to come home anyways so why-“

“Liz I don’t know how long it’ll take us to figure this out.” Matt made eye contact with me finally, “I’m not doing the best for you, and you’re spiraling out of control, Zack sees it too. We talked an hour or so ago, he agreed it would be good for me to go, I uh… I already packed some things up I’m gonna head off tonight.”

I felt tears welling in my eyes but once again I was nodding before I even know my muscles worked, “Ok, don’t uh, don’t forget to pack your phone charger and… Lots of underwear and shirts.”

“Lizzy, it’ll be ok.” He leaned down and kissed the side of my head, “We just need time to breath.”

I looked up and sighed, “You can leave now then, thanks for making sure I didn’t die on your watch.”

“Come on-“

“Go. It’s about time you finally bail on this for good. I’ve spent how many years of my fucking life waiting around for your dumb ass, calling you, being there for you, waiting around for you to figure it all the fuck out and finally…” I scoffed a little at the hurt reaction on his face, “I’m still not good enough for you. It’s Val, isn’t it.”

“Excuse me?” Matt froze as he began to stand up, “What?”

“You’ve been fucking her, haven’t you?”

“Elizabeth don’t start this now, come on-“

“Brian’s party? Big Bear? Every time you haven’t come home? You’re fucking her again and I’m not sticking around to let it ruin my life so yeah, maybe leaving is the best option for you right now.”

“Oh you think I’m fucking someone behind your back?!” He raised his hands.

“No! It’s directly in front of my fucking face! Brian pretty much solidified it for me the other night!” I shouted, glaring up at him as tears fell down my cheeks, “You’ve never been mine and you never will be! Fuck off, I don’t want to be married to you any more Matt Sanders!”

Matt stepped backwards as if I had just thrown something at him, “Liz don’t be absurd, that’s not what this is about-“

“So have you, or have you not, been fucking Val.” I crossed my arms and inhaled deeply as he paused, “There’s my answer. Right there. I don’t want a separation, I want a fucking divorce.”