You

As soon as Joanna stepped foot inside Tony's place, she noticed that it was beyond trashed. He hadn't changed since school. In a way, she guessed maybe he had changed even just slightly.

"Excuse the mess," Tony mumbled. " I wasn't expecting company."

"You mean..." she stopped herself from the smartass remark that was urging to slip past her lips.

"It's never like this unless I'm burning down and in a shitty mood because of it."

"Nice."

"My room is the only decent spot. C'mon follow me."

Joanna froze. His bedroom? "Actually I just remembered I've gotta meet up with Becky and the girls to go over plans for Matt's party."

"Wait I didnt mean it as-"

"Thanks for the food, but I gotta go."

She quickly made her way back outside and ran back up the way she came. Innocent or not, she was not going to be stuck in any room with Tony that wasn't bigger than a kitchen or living room. She may have been overacting but she still saw her choice to leave the best.

----

"He actually invited you into his room?!" Becky, Jeremiah's fiancee asked. She was a very pretty lady with long, flowy brown hair with green eyes, not pasty white but nowhere near tanned skin and a knockout body type. At first glance you'd swear she was a snobby bitch, but she was far from it.

"Said it was the only place decent enough," Joanna mumbled.

"He's ballsy man."

"Of course it's the only decent spot. That's the 'magic happening room' where all the girls go to fuck him," Rachael, Matt's wife, added with a scoff. "Fucking man whore from hell."

Rachael was naturally tan with blue/gray eyes. Her hair was shoulder length and was dyed burgundy. She was built more average, much like Joanna was. Both Rachael and Becky were covered in tattoos, where Joanna only had a few here and there.

"I figured," Joanna sighed.

"What the hell were you even at his house for anyways? He did what he did to you in high school and has been rather shitty with you this entire week. I just dont get it," Rachael went on.

"He gave me a ride back to Matt's house after apologizing to me for the week's worth of bullshit he put me through. Me being a natural smartass, said something I shouldn't have and pissed him off. For whatever reason I felt bad for it and wound up at his house to say sorry. He knew I had smoked on the way over and used my food as his excuse to get me inside."

"What a pig!"

"Nah, I don't think he was planning on using it to get me in bed with him Beck, but I know how he is from personal experience and he wasn't gonna win this time."

"I know," Becky sighed, "But still, he was an idiot for even thinking his bedroom was an ok option."

"Right," both Rachael and Joanna agreed at the same time.

"So enough of my drama, what's the plans for Matt's party? I have the guys' version of it and Matt is helping plan it out," Joanna asked after deciding to get off the subject of Tony.

"No no no he can't help plan something of his own!" Rachael groaned and pulled out her phone immediately.

Becky and Joanna laughed as Rachael waited for Matt to pick up.

"Evening ladies,"Nick said sweetly as he and Jeremiah joined the girls.

"Nick," Joanna nodded with a smile.

"Where's Jere and Matt at?" Becky asked as Nick sat down with Joanna.

"They were literally right behind me. They're probably inside stuffing their faces while they wait for dinner," he shrugged.

"Ugh whatever," Rachael mumbled. "You guys are fired from planning his party. Us girls will take over like it should have been in the first place."

"Oh come on that's not fair!" Nick whined.

"What's not fair?" Matt asked as he and Jeremiah joined the group.

"None of you are in charge of party plans anymore," Joanna replied, shooting him a grin.

"I saw that coming," Matt sighed.

"But hey at least you'll have a normal birthday this year," Jeremiah added.

Matt nodded before bending over his wife to kiss her.

"Aww the sweet Lovato of the bunch," Joanna laughed.

"Yes he is," Rachael agreed.

"Yes I am," Matt grinned.

Joanna gagged playfully earning laughs all around. The night continued on with the guys playing video games and the girls drinking wine and planning Matt's party. Joanna truly did miss this, but she knew her place wasn't in Illinois anymore. It hurt her but she knew better.

XxxxxX

Never caught my breath
Every second I'm without you I'm a mess
Ever know each other
Trust these words are stones
why cuts aren't healing
Learning how to love

I'm melting (I'm melting)
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while
And I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
(Stay with me lay with me now)

You could stay and watch me fall
And of course I'll ask for help
Just stay with me now
Take my hand
We could take our heads off
stay in bed just make love that's all
Just stay with me now

Two weeks had passed and it was finally the night before Matt's birthday. Joanna was enjoying the quiet night out back of Matt's house. She had The Used playing quietly in the background. She had been staying with him and Rachael after realizing that, although her dad loved having her back around, she wasn't really wanted at his house.

He told her it was because he was never home. Joanna knew better though, she reminded him too much of her mom. It didnt bother her though, she was well used to it.

Tony had practically been around Joanna daily since the day she accepted his apology. It reminded her of the old days. The days before they hooked up and everything was ruined shortly after.

As the song continued, Joanna heard someone walking up to her.

"You're up awful early," Tony said while swiping a cigarette from her pack.

"More like up awful late," Joanna corrected him.

"You're gonna be a zombie at the party."

"Yeah probably," she sighed.

"Speaking of the party, is it really like a couples thing?"

"Well I mean even though a good majority of the people coming are either married or with someone, no 'cause I'm going alone. I thought you had someone to bring though, so why ask?"

"Yeah that idea flopped last minute. Guess I'll be like you and go alone," he shrugged.

Joanna nodded quietly.

"Unless you wanna be my date," Tony shrugged again.

"I don't think..."

"I mean we wouldn't have to hook up or anything. It's just not fun going out places like they've got planned to go to alone."

"Yeah but-"

"I promise nothing more than two friends sitting near each other at dinner. Two friends maybe tossing back a few shots at the club afterwards. Two friends supporting my cousin on his birthday, and maybe smashing his face in the cake."

Joanna sighed again, but didn't answer right away.

"Please give me this chance to make everything up to you."

"What are you talking about?"

Tony let out a frustrated growl, "I know who you are. I've known for a while now."

Joanna gasped. She knew the past two weeks were too good to be true, "Who fucking told you?"

"I... what?"

"Who fucking told you who I was?!"

"I figured it out on my own," he shrugged.

"Matt told didn't he?" She thought back to the odd exchange of words between him and Matt the day Tony gave her a ride to Matt's after the food run.

"I told you, I figured it out myself. None of the guys had anything to do with it."

"That's crap."

Joanna watched as he dug into his hoody pocket and pulled something out of it. She watched as a stack of pictures slid towards her. She used the light coming through the kitchen window for support to view the pictures.

They were all of her and the guys. Some matched the ones in her childhood bedroom where a couple she didn't even know existed.

"I uh found them about three weeks ago by accident. Matt had been riding my ass about how I had been treating you. I got frustrated and punched my bedroom wall, the force knocked a shoebox full of pictures onto the floor," he paused to relight his cigarette, "I came across one that had Nick and the doobie in his mouth, you and I had our arms around each other, and Matt rolling his eyes. I guess Jere was the photographer cause he was missing."

Joanna laughed slightly as the memory of that exact picture and the conversation with the others, "Yeah Matt was rolling his eyes because Jere had said 'Smile at the camera for uncle JereBear."

"Oh shit yeah I remember that now," Tony chuckled.

"I had forgotten that until we were in my old room looking at my pictures of all of us growing up. I have this exact picture."

Tony nodded, "Keep flipping through them, maybe there's a couple you haven't seen or don't remember. I had a blast going through them. It's been too long."

Joanna nodded while she looked at each picture. She smiled to herself at each one, thinking back to each time one was taken. Her smile faltered though as she came across a couple that had only her and Tony in them. She froze, seeing herself and him at Halloween time.

"No."

Tony looked confused, "No?"

She slammed the pictures down on the table between them and stood up, "It won't work. You took advantage of my feelings that night and then threw me away! Fuck you dude."

"Jo wait a second," he grabbed her wrist to stop her from leaving.

"Get your hand off of me. "

"Listen to me for a minute please?"

"Nope."

"Come on Jo! Look I'm sorry ok? It was the-"

"Don't you dare blame it on the alcohol!"

"You wanted me just as badly as I wanted you," he sighed. "I just didn't want to ruin our friendship by dating."

"Oh but having sex was ok?"

"I thought it was," he shrugged. "You're the one who bailed though, not me. I was ready to resume being your friend afterwards but you ran away."

"I didn't run away you dipshit! My parents got a divorce. Dad didn't want me around anymore so I had to leave with mom! Even fucking now he doesn't want me around!"

"I didn't know that, " he sighed, even though he did know.

"Yeah well had you not ignored me like I was the fucking plague maybe you would have figured it out!"

"I'm fucking sorry ok?!"

"No, take your apology and shove it up your fucking ass!"

Joanna took off on foot. Tony wasn't sure where she was headed, but she wasn't going be hanging out with Tony anymore. She wasn't even sure that she would stay for Matt's party now that Tony revealed he knew exactly who she was.