Winter Comfort
An unlikely save.
Its been a while since I’ve felt myself breathe…truly breathe. The past couple of months was every nightmare I had actualised into one single hell. After the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D, I thought that all internal dramas were put aside. Hydra was defeated, I got a new job at the Avenger facility which meant I could continue working alongside earth’s greatest hero, yet all that seemed to be discenergrating yet again. With the Avengers disbanded, a huge rift had once again placed me in a place of contempt. It was like life was constantly handing me ultimatums I could choose between and all my anxiety seemed to cripple me. Even the way I held onto my coffee was tighter, but could you blame me?I felt not only a fool but unsafe in every way. Who was I to trust if I couldn’t even trust the actions of my own.
“Miss, you’re $0.15 short” I look up to face the young woman talking. The innocence in her eyes, thats what drove me everyday. To protect innocent lives like hers, but I’m failing.
I dug through my wallet, my head consumed with guilt, “Sorry” I replied
“Sorry”, I repeated, though I didn’t mean for the $0.15 I couldn’t find but how I felt inside, “I think I’m short on cash, do you take card?”
“No ma’m, cash only” as she pointed to the sign I so clearly missed.
“It’s fine I got it”, I turn around to face the man with the familiar voice behind me, it was Steve. Leave it to Captain America to swoop in and save the day.
“Jocelyn, right?” He looked different. His usually clean shaven face and perfectly pushed back hair was now replaced with scruff and a hat. His demeanour was soft as opposed to strict and he was wearing jeans and t-shirt. In all my years, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Steve so… un-steve.
“Correct capt” I teased. He hated being called Captain, always going around correcting the interns. Aside from being above average in just about anything, Steve was refreshingly humble. He didn’t partake in the ego contest between Tony and the other avenger, he didn’t care for the fame or recognition, he just cared for morality.
“Easy there kid, you know it’s just Steve” he corrected with a giggle
“I know but you saved my morning and isn’t that very Captain America of you? Saving and all” God I missed seeing that smile as he passed the halls. I missed those silent elevator rides, his muscular frame running about the facility. Seeing him daily gave me purpose, the purpose that I’d lost since he left.
“It was just a coffee, really no effort at all” that grin still splayed across his now rugged face. At first glance you wouldn’t have assumed it was the clean shaven hero plastered across PSAs around the country but those eyes, those piercing blue eyes gave him away to those who ever had the pleasure to meeting him
In unison we walk towards the counter to pick up our drinks as we fight our way through the morning crowd, bumping into each other ever so slightly. I could feel my heart skip a little each time we touched.
“So, what you doing down here on a Saturday morning… didn’t think Captain America would be a coffee kinda guy?” I inquire as I stir my drink.
“Just needed the air I guess”, I could sense some pain in his voice. The same one that has haunted me recently. “What about you, its a bit early, no partying last night?”
“Well sir, if you must know that little stunt you and Tony pulled left a hell of a mess and a lot of paper work too and so no party, just fuel”
“Paperwork on a Saturday?! I would think they’d at least have the decency to let you off on a weekend” They did, but I needed to get out of my house. I couldn’t dare spend another day laying at home, devoured by my own thoughts. “My sincerest apologies”
“And I thought you they should have had the decency to discharge you from your “crimes”” I raised my finger in the air, hoping he’d understand my sarcasm. Do 100 year old men even understand air quotes? I must look like an idiot “Speaking of which, shouldn’t you be hiding out somewhere… foreign?”
“you’re not gonna tattle on me, are you? I did pay for your coffee so you kinda owe me” He cheekily replied. Was he flirting I wondered.
“Owe you? Sir, I have around 40 piles of horrid and tedious PAPER to get through because of you, you owe’d me, I was just kind enough to let you go on the account of everything the past year and all” I tried to keep it light, but did I say something wrong? Should I’ve brought up the past couple of months? Oh it was so like me to offend without effort.
“haha alright so we’re even then? That makes us friends and friends do favours. So can you be a friend a do me a little favour and not tell everyone about where I am”
“Captain America gets morning coffee, thats hardly an impressive tale. Don’t worry your secrets safe with me… friend” you wink as you make your way to the door. I look back to shout “Thank for the save though” as I grab one last look of the beautiful man that stood there holding his coffee.
“Anytime” he replied.
The entire drive through the suburbs I was distracted, consumed by the darkness again. As I pulled into the new facility I wondered, given the current circumstances would I ever see that beautiful face again. Long gone were the days of vision passing through walls and Falcon cracking jokes. Everyone had chosen a side and everyone was angry.
“Miss, you’re $0.15 short” I look up to face the young woman talking. The innocence in her eyes, thats what drove me everyday. To protect innocent lives like hers, but I’m failing.
I dug through my wallet, my head consumed with guilt, “Sorry” I replied
“Sorry”, I repeated, though I didn’t mean for the $0.15 I couldn’t find but how I felt inside, “I think I’m short on cash, do you take card?”
“No ma’m, cash only” as she pointed to the sign I so clearly missed.
“It’s fine I got it”, I turn around to face the man with the familiar voice behind me, it was Steve. Leave it to Captain America to swoop in and save the day.
“Jocelyn, right?” He looked different. His usually clean shaven face and perfectly pushed back hair was now replaced with scruff and a hat. His demeanour was soft as opposed to strict and he was wearing jeans and t-shirt. In all my years, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Steve so… un-steve.
“Correct capt” I teased. He hated being called Captain, always going around correcting the interns. Aside from being above average in just about anything, Steve was refreshingly humble. He didn’t partake in the ego contest between Tony and the other avenger, he didn’t care for the fame or recognition, he just cared for morality.
“Easy there kid, you know it’s just Steve” he corrected with a giggle
“I know but you saved my morning and isn’t that very Captain America of you? Saving and all” God I missed seeing that smile as he passed the halls. I missed those silent elevator rides, his muscular frame running about the facility. Seeing him daily gave me purpose, the purpose that I’d lost since he left.
“It was just a coffee, really no effort at all” that grin still splayed across his now rugged face. At first glance you wouldn’t have assumed it was the clean shaven hero plastered across PSAs around the country but those eyes, those piercing blue eyes gave him away to those who ever had the pleasure to meeting him
In unison we walk towards the counter to pick up our drinks as we fight our way through the morning crowd, bumping into each other ever so slightly. I could feel my heart skip a little each time we touched.
“So, what you doing down here on a Saturday morning… didn’t think Captain America would be a coffee kinda guy?” I inquire as I stir my drink.
“Just needed the air I guess”, I could sense some pain in his voice. The same one that has haunted me recently. “What about you, its a bit early, no partying last night?”
“Well sir, if you must know that little stunt you and Tony pulled left a hell of a mess and a lot of paper work too and so no party, just fuel”
“Paperwork on a Saturday?! I would think they’d at least have the decency to let you off on a weekend” They did, but I needed to get out of my house. I couldn’t dare spend another day laying at home, devoured by my own thoughts. “My sincerest apologies”
“And I thought you they should have had the decency to discharge you from your “crimes”” I raised my finger in the air, hoping he’d understand my sarcasm. Do 100 year old men even understand air quotes? I must look like an idiot “Speaking of which, shouldn’t you be hiding out somewhere… foreign?”
“you’re not gonna tattle on me, are you? I did pay for your coffee so you kinda owe me” He cheekily replied. Was he flirting I wondered.
“Owe you? Sir, I have around 40 piles of horrid and tedious PAPER to get through because of you, you owe’d me, I was just kind enough to let you go on the account of everything the past year and all” I tried to keep it light, but did I say something wrong? Should I’ve brought up the past couple of months? Oh it was so like me to offend without effort.
“haha alright so we’re even then? That makes us friends and friends do favours. So can you be a friend a do me a little favour and not tell everyone about where I am”
“Captain America gets morning coffee, thats hardly an impressive tale. Don’t worry your secrets safe with me… friend” you wink as you make your way to the door. I look back to shout “Thank for the save though” as I grab one last look of the beautiful man that stood there holding his coffee.
“Anytime” he replied.
The entire drive through the suburbs I was distracted, consumed by the darkness again. As I pulled into the new facility I wondered, given the current circumstances would I ever see that beautiful face again. Long gone were the days of vision passing through walls and Falcon cracking jokes. Everyone had chosen a side and everyone was angry.