Status: Complete

Risk It All

Fresh Slate

Nolee's eyes flickered with nervousness watching the slender man before her. There was a certain peculiar charisma that the man in a hickory colored suit donned. His light cool brown hair had straight and layered just reaching the end of his neck. His icy blue eyes held a curious look towards her and assuming the way his skin looked slightly weathered Nolee assumed to be in his at least late 40's.

"If your respective party doesn't mind, I usually like to conduct my interviews alone. This shouldn't take too long." Agent Smecker informed Kira and Murphy who seemed uneasy at the idea but Kira was the first to comply.

"I'm gonna go see Connor. I'll be back later." Kira assured Nolee as she gave a small nod watching the tall brunette walk out.

"I'll just be outside ta room okay? Call out ta me if ye need me." Murphy whispered firmly.

"I'm scared." she whispered back as he lifted her hand to kiss the top of it.

"Just tell the truth love, it's all ye can do." Murphy assured as he slowly stood up from where he sat on her bed. Nolee anxiously watch Agent Smecker give a thankful nod to Murphy as he exited the room before shifting his attention back to Nolee.

"Am I going to jail?" she whispered afraid causing Agent Smecker to lift an eyebrow.

"What makes you say that?"

"Because of what happened..."

"Well that's why I'm here to get your side of the story Miss Wade, I just want to make sure we have all the correct facts here. I know there was some pretty intense events that took place at your apartment last night. Can you explain to me your relationship to Mr. Lockwood?"

"He-he was my ex boyfriend." she answered softly.

"How long were you together?"

"It was around 6 years."

"How would you describe your relationship with Mr. Lockwood?" Agent Smecker questioned as the small looked down and fumbled with her hands.

"I know this may be difficult Miss Wade, but it's procedure to get the necessary details to distinguish self defense from homicide."

"I didn't kill him on purpose." Nolee replied astounded as he lifted his hand up calmly.

"I'm not trying to imply you did Miss Wade. Like I stated previously, I just need to get the necessary details. So again, could you describe your relationship with Mr. Lockwood?"

"Tristan and I met in high school, he had transferred from Nebraska. When we met things were pretty good, it felt any high school romance. Tristan was...kind. But then he fell into the wrong crowd of people, very bad people. They managed to convince him to join their lifestyle and the more he hung around them...he became like them. Eventually he turned abusive."

"What kind of abuse?"

"He abused me all the ways you could abuse someone. Physically, emotionally, and mentally."

"Did you ever let anyone know about the abuse? Tell the police?"

"No...I never did. I was too scared..."

"And how long did the abuse last Miss Wade?"

"It lasted until I decided to run away from him."

"Where did you go to?"

"I fled from Phoenix to Boston. I've been living here to escape him."

"So Mr. Lockwood eventually caught on to you to leaving and tried to track you down."

"Yes. He had a friend track me down and stalk me basically, his name is Foster. When he found me out he alerted Tristan and when I had been out my apartment he managed to break in. When I returned home he was waiting there with a gun and threatened to harm me and people I cared about if I didn't return back to Phoenix with him."

"At what point did Mr. MacManus show up?"

"He had come to check on me, I was supposed to go to the movies with him but decided to stay home because my pregnancy had been messing with me. Tristan had held a gun to my back and made me turn him away, he threatened to shoot Murphy if I hadn't. Murphy had pretended to leave my apartment, but kicked open my door shortly afterwards. It was then Tristan and Murphy ensued into a brawl. When I attempted to call the police, the gun Tristan had been holding wound up at my feet. When Tristan managed to knock Murphy unconscious I grabbed the gun from the floor." Nolee explained but stopping to inhale a deep breath unable to continue.

"What happened next Miss Wade?"

"I warned Tristan if he made a move towards me or my child I'd shoot him. When he knew I wasn't going to comply with him anymore, he tried to lunge at me. That's when I pulled the trigger." Nolee admitted running a hand through her hair still unable to say it out out loud without wanting to break down but her tears betrayed her yet again. "I didn't want to kill him...I just wanted to protect my child."

"I understand Miss Wade." Agent Smecker replied gently. "From what I gather then, what you described clearly meets the criteria for self defense. You don't have to worry about being charged with anything." he assured her as she let out a breath of relief.

"But coincidentally your story ties into some recent crimes being committed in Boston. If I'm assuming correctly the Foster in your story is most likely Foster Evans. We've been trying to catch him for a while now, he's a well known drug dealer and recently suspected of holding a man at gunpoint. The victim says Mr. Evans had confused him for another Irishman. If my intuition serves me right like it usually does, I will say Mr. Evans most likely thought the man was Mr. MacManus." Agent Smecker put together making Nolee's stomach twist.

"What about Foster? What if he tries to come after me next?" she questioned fearfully.

"We can put in a protection order for you from Mr. Evans."

"How can you guarantee that'll be enough?"

"I can assure you we're working hard to take Mr. Evans into custody. I have good reason to believe with his latest mishaps lately it won't belong before he slips up. When we catch him, I will let you know Miss Wade, you have my word."

"Okay..." was all Nolee could muster in reply. At first glance Agent Smecker seemed to be intimidating with his icy stare, but as he continued to speak Nolee was strangely drawn to his unique body language.

"I believe that is all I need to know, I won't pester you further I'm aware you need to be resting right now. Thankfully after what took place you're still here with us and safe, that's the most important thing. However I will need to inform you it may take some time until you'll be able to return to your apartment, you won't be able to enter until the crime scene has been officially cleaned up. Will you have a place to stay?"

"Yes, I will." Nolee assured as Agent Smecker gave a curt nod.

"Between you and me Miss Wade, it sounds like Mr. Lockwood is better off six feet below." he added giving the small girl a smile in sympathy. "For the record I already knew you were innocent before I came here."

"T-thank you...for believing me." Nolee whispered gratefully.

"Of course, I think after all you've gone through it's time you have some people on your side now. When I head back to the station I'll make sure we get the case closed as soon as possible." Agent Smecker noted as he adjusted his coat. "I hope you are able to gain some peace of mind now Miss Wade. I wish you the best of luck with your delivery, sounds like you and your child deserve a fresh slate." he added giving Nolee one last smile before swiftly exiting the room with the same charisma he had entering. Nolee sank into the hospital bed and wrapped her arms around herself.

'Sounds like you and your child deserve a fresh slate.' Agent Smecker's words repeated in her mind. There was an adjustment that needed to be made clearly. She knew now it was time to pick up all the broken fragments of her life and learn how to piece them back together then.

The question was though, where the hell did she even start?

___

It seemed like an eternity that Nolee had to sit in that awful hospital bed. The constant evaluation was diminishing any sanity she had left. But everytime she would find herself frustrated, it was a wake up call that things could have gone so much worse, therefore she needed to be grateful her and her child were unharmed.

Murphy and Connor did their best to keep the small girl entertained, especially when Kira had returned home. Both of them even going so far as to dress up like doctors and parody medical shows on TV. It gave her some hope that even in the midst of her misfortune she could still be able to laugh. Maybe that was the first step in the right direction of recovering.

"Alright, drop ye trousers and spread em' brudder." Connor grinned slapping a pair of gloves on. "Time for ye prostate exam."

"Get ye fuckin' hands off me Connor!" Murphy yelled in annoyance as the brothers began to continue their saga of brotherly bantering. A small smile spread across the girl's face watching the twins, this was probably the only time Nolee had been actually grateful to hear their banter.

The universe finally deciding to have some mercy, Nolee sighed in relief when she was given the okay to go home. Of course the doctor had given her a long lecture about remembering to stay stress free beforehand, but at least she could finally get out of the god awful hospital gown. Connor had been kind enough to get her a change of clothes from her apartment, despite her not being able to go back just yet. The thought of returning to her apartment had put her on edge just thinking about it. When she was given her discharge papers and officially free to go, her hands trembled as she stood in front of the hospital doors staring at the only barrier between her and the new life that awaited her.

"When ye walk out of here, everythin' will be different. It will be just like Charlotte returning home ta Boston. Ye are braver than you have ever been Nolee Wade." Murphy whispered encouragingly as she shifted her focus to the brothers who stood on each side of her. Inhaling a deep breath and taking Murphy's hand in hers she took the first steps through the sliding doors. Walking out the hospital and into the Boston gloomy skies, she watched the thick raindrops crash against the ground.

The brothers had began to walk ahead several steps when they realized Nolee hadn't moved any further. Allowing the rain to fall on her and graze her face Nolee closed her eyes and blocked her mind out. It was as if the skies had been giving their own sign of encouragement and washing away the last of the tainted pieces.

"Lass, are ye okay?" Connor questioned concerned.

"Ye gettin' all wet love." Murphy added with his own concern.

"Just let me stay here for a second. I just want to feel the rain." she whispered in a soft plea with her eyes still closed. The twins looked at each other briefly remaining silent as they obeyed the girl's request. Nolee felt as is she could stay there forever and she would have had it not been for Murphy retaking a hold of her hand after a while.

"Come on lass, if ye get any more wet ye gonna catch a cold." he told her worriedly as the three began to walk away from the hospital. It was strange how certain events could culminate and suddenly make you view the world differently. Your senses start to notice things you hadn't before and as strange as it is, it's also enlightening.

The rain had eventually subside as they made their way back to the brothers' apartment this time and Nolee welcomed the unusually barren apartment.

"I'm gonna go visit Roc, been a while since I've see him. I'll update him on everything." Connor told his twin knowingly. "I'll see ye later lass." he added giving the small girl a hug before exiting the apartment.

"What do ye want to do now love? We can order some takeout if ye like?" Murphy asked gently as he removed his coat and hung up his rosary on the wall.

"Will...will you please just hold me for a while?" she requested quietly wanting nothing more than to feel his arms wrap around her, seeing as there hadn't been much time just the two of them at the hospital. Murphy's face had softened as he quickly nodded his head.

"Of course I will." he answered softly making his way over where she stood by his bed. As both of them climbed into the messy and undone bed Nolee curled up into a ball with Murphy cradling her. None of them spoke a word and they didn't have to.

As her eyes were glued to the wall her mind seemed to play a movie of her life. Six years ago she wouldn't have ever guessed that her life would lead her to this moment. Coming to terms with the fact that Tristan was now forever gone by her own hands, and inevitably her life had changed once again. But this time Nolee had wanted to shed her old identity. The hospital nurses had deemed her a 'survivor' and even though it may been true, that was no longer the label she wanted. She did not want to be the survivor of someone's abuse. She longed to be the person she was before Tristan ever came in her life. She simply longed to be just...Nolee Wade.

"Murphy?" she whispered quietly once more listening to his steady heartbeat.

"Yes?"

"Will you sing me the song you sang me in the hospital again?"

"As ye wish love."
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for the record I'm not very knowledgeable about hospitals and crime stuff, I tried my best to be realistic but I apologize if it isn't. Early updates cause I'm impatient.