Risk It All

The weather became increasingly cold and crisp as the Fall weather was in full bloom. Immaculate orange and yellow leaves piled up on the sidewalks making it challenging to get around. It was also a reminder that it would not be long before the holidays arrived.

"Shit." Nolee mumbled as she observed her stomach in the mirror after her morning ritual of vomiting. Her bump had seemed to grow overnight and she bit her lip knowing time was running out. Any moment she was about to turn into a human beach ball. She nervously ran a hand through her short hair.

"Okay, don't panic. You can still pass it off as period bloat." she tried to reassure herself but it helped little. She anxiously reached for an old long sleeved top and pulled it over head, the baggy end of it had helped conceal her stomach.

"Looks like it's baggy shirts from now on." she grumbled sliding on her pants. Just as she put half of her hair in a ponytail and on cue her bladder felt as if it would burst. She dramatically whined as she ran back to the bathroom a new symptom of peeing 24/7 had also arrived, how lovely.

When Nolee managed to stop being a human Niagra Falls, she slipped her shoes and grabbed her purse glancing at the microwave, horror filled her eyes as she looked at the clock once more.

"Fuck!" she shouted in a wave of panic not realizing she had lost track of time. The first time ever she had risked being late. Unapologetic she brushed by the various citizens in her path, some yelling at her in the process.

"Get out my way I'm late!" was all she would yell back each time. Just a few minutes over, she reached for the glass door handle and flung it open, making Kira jump.

"Holy shitballs! You scared me." Kira gasped making her emerald eyes widen largely while Nolee scurried behind the register. "You're never late, did something happen?" she asked with a voice full of concern. Nolee shook her head while still trying to catch her breath, that was probably the most exercise she had gotten in months.

"Nothing happened except my bladder being the size of a child's apparently."

"Yikes."

"You have no idea, I have to pee literally every 5 minutes now."

"That's rough, you better be extra careful with Cosmo around. He's already suspicious when you use the bathroom."

"I'm aware."

"Well lucky for you he's not even here yet, so I'll mark you on time today."

"You're a lifesaver."

"I know I am, now get to work preggers, we need more apple fritters."

"Aye aye captain."

_

After completing the morning's bakeries the day had almost was perceived to be decent had it not been for the customer that came in.

"Excuse me, but is your bacon chicken or beef?"

Kira and Nolee could only stare back at the man in disbelief for a solid 5 minutes, creating a new record of the dumbest customer to ever come into Cosmo's.

"I don't get paid enough for this shit." Kira grumbled as she walked away to clean tables. Nolee giggled to herself shaking her head as she glanced at the clock on the wall. It wasn't long until three o'clock would strike. She curiously wondered if Murphy would be in to visit her again, since it seemed that was his new hobby. Even if it was still kind of weird, she had to admit that she had begun to get used to him, after all he had deemed their 'friends.' The corners of her lips curled up in amusement at the thought.

"What are you are all happy about over there?" Kira asked confused as she walk past Nolee noticing her expression.

"Nothing." Nolee replied casually as Kira raised her eyebrows.

"Mmhm. What, you happy about seeing your lover boy?" Kira smirked as Nolee gasped.

"Excuse me?"

"I mean he only visits you practically everyday. I can see how differently you're changing, be honest you're becoming fond of him aren't you?"

"No...? I mean fine I admit, he's not as bad I thought, but there's nothing special going on."

"Right. So if that's true, then why did he walk you home?" Kira questioned crossing her arms over her chest. Nolee couldn't hide the blush spreading along her cheeks.

"Yeah, I saw you."

"How did you even see us?"

"I was eating at Rosalie's with Brian."

"You sound really stalkerish right now."

"Don't try and avoid the subject Nols."

"Just cause we went to dinner one time-"

"Wait what? You went to dinner with him and you didn't tell me?!"

"Shit..." Nolee whispered to herself.

"Well?! What happened?" Kira demanded impatiently.

"Nothing happened! It wasn't planned, it just sort of happened after my doctor's appointment. I saw him when I was going home, he works at the meat packing plant."

"Really?"

"Yes. I mean it wasn't necessarily bad. We just talked about random stuff, but I guess we're friends now though." Nolee answered shrugging.

"Friends? So, he's cool with you being prego?" Kira asked surprised. Nolee's mouth made an O shape as she glanced sideways.

"I haven't quite told him yet?"

"You haven't told him?! Don't you think that's something he should know now? I mean, Cosmo is different. But this could get messy!"

"Well what am I supposed to say exactly? Hey by the way I'm pregnant, hope that's cool with you."

"He needs to know Nolee. Like soonish."

"I know..." Nolee whispered feeling guilt start to consume her.

"Maybe you can try to tell him at the Halloween party at McGinty's." Kira suggested thoughtfully.

"Halloween party?" Nolee replied confused.

"Yeah, I mean Halloween is next, duh."

"Shit, I didn't even realize."

"Well everyone is planning to be there, but you gotta dress up. Oh my god, I can dress you up!" Kira beamed clapping her hands.

"Really? I'm not really festive when it comes to Halloween."

"Oh come on, I have tons of stuff you can pick from. Plus, your lover boy is likely to be there."

"Please stop referring to him as lover boy, his name is Murphy." Nolee replied cringing.

"Murphy huh? Hmm... it suits him."

"Plus what if it gets a little too crazy on Halloween, probably not the best idea I go."

"Well...if you don't you need to figure something out. Because he deserves to know Nolee."

"But what if he...doesn't take it well."

"The he doesn't take it well and you can move on like nothing happened. Either way, you can't avoid this any further."

"How come you're suddenly being the voice of reason now?" Nolee resented as Kira laughed.

"Every now and then I actually can be sensible."

"I'm proud of you."

"Thank you, I try."

____

The rest of the day had passed by without Murphy showing up. Nolee was a bit surprised, but she quickly shook the thought away. Why would she care anyways, he does have a life of his own.

She quickly took out the trash while Kira closed up the register. When all their tasks were finished they bid their goodbyes like always, Nolee carefully locked the doors.

"Nolee." a voice spoke making her jump and gasp. She turned to the person and breathed a sigh of relief to see Murphy.

"Murphy you scared me."

"I'm sorry lass, didn't mean ta startle ye."

"It's okay. What are you doing here so late though?"

"Well I got caught up helpin' Rocco get his hair unstuck from ta blow dryer. Again."

"Again?" Nolee questioned curiously as Murphy nodded his head.

"Again. Let's just say Rocco isn't exactly normal."

"Is anyone ever really normal though?" she teased as he shrugged and gave a nod of agreement.

"Touche lass. Anyways, I was hopin' to catch ye before you left to go home."

"Oh yeah, what for?"

"Ever been to ta Greenway?"

_____

A short trip on the subway had brought Nolee back to downtown. She watched Murphy carefully as he sat next to her in silence. He wore his sunglasses the whole ride and had his arms crossed over his chest.

"Where we going?" Nolee finally asked.

"Just a place, don't worry you'll like it." was he all he said as she eyed him suspiciously the remainder of the trip. When they finally got off, he helped her off the subway and began to lead the way back up above ground. They walked for what seemed like a long time until they reached a dimly lit path. The sun had gone drastically leaving the sky a deep blue and providing just enough light to see where she was going. Her senses started to become alive as she looked at Murphy.

"Where are we?"

"We're almost t'ere lass."

"This is it isn't it? The nice guy act is over, you're going to murder me now."

"Umm...no?" Murphy replied confused.

"Why is it so dark over here then? You're gonna bury me alive aren't you?" she gasped as Murphy raised his eyebrow.

"What ta hell Nolee, do you watch too much Law and Order or sometin?"

"Maybe. So what if I do, it's a good show! Olivia Benson is a bad ass, and hey we're not talking about me right now mister."

"What are we talkin' about t'en?"

"How you're planning to murder me."

"Jesus Christ, I'm not gonna murder ye."

"That's what they all say."

"Oh my god." he groaned as they walked a bit further before we stopped. "We're here, see?" he clarified pointing to a big sign. Nolee stared at the words that read 'Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy Greenway.' Nolee looked around in curiosity and walked over to the grass area. There was various gigantic art sculptures scattered about. Surrounded by plazas and promenades with landscaped gardens. Nolee's eyes sparkled in amazement never knowing such a place existed.

"Wow." she whispered aloud. "This is so cool."

"I told ye you'd like it didn't I?" Murphy smiled studying her reaction. Nolee ran her hand around the muli-colored sculpture in a child-like wonder. She had never seen been to a place like this before.

"T'eres different art each time. " he explained as she smiled.

"They're beautiful."

"I like ta come here a lot, good place ta think." Murphy added as she looked back at him. Her attention was quickly distracted by a large yellow object.

"What the heck is that?!" she exclaimed trotting off closer to it realizing it was a yellow house tilted on its side in the middle of the grass. It has three windows and a front door, quite a random piece to have just laying there. She stared at it infatuated for some reason unable to turn her eyes away from it. Murphy soon joined here to where she stood.

"Christ, imagine being drunk and tryin' ta get into a house like t'at." he stated unsure of the piece. Nolee couldn't help but laugh at his reaction making him look back at her. She shifted her gaze to the floor shyly.

"Let's uhh see what else is there."

They explored the rest of the greenway and the other sculptures, Murphy naturally providing jokes the whole way. Nolee would be lying to herself if she said she wasn't enjoying herself. The setting was calm and peaceful and Murphy's company had been nice. He had at least made a huge effort to keep her entertained and feel comfortable. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this at ease.

"So Rocco, you mention him a lot who is he?" she inquired unapologetically being nosy.

"Ahh Roc? He's a good friend of Connor and I. We met him ta first night we came to McGinty's and well we sort of adopted him. He's not always ta smartest guy in ta world, but he's got a good heart. We love him for ta gentle gorilla he is."

"He seems like an interesting guy, I'd like to meet him." Nolee teased.

"I'm sure ye will meet him soon don't worry. Hey t'at reminds me t'eres a Halloween thing going on ta bar. You should come."

"Oh yeah Kira told me about it."

"It'd be pretty cool if you came."

"Why is that?"

"Cause if you didn't t'en I wouldn't have a reason ta go." Murphy smiled lightly making her blush.

"I'll umm think about it." she replied softly as he gave a nod.

"Okay."

"Thanks by the way, for taking me here. I appreciate it." she added politely.

"You're very welcome. I appreciate t'at you appreciate it." he teased causing her to smile again. He seemed to be able to that a lot it seemed. They continued to chat about random things for a little while which somehow seemed to revolve around music mostly.

"I don't know about ye, but I'm awfully hungry."

"I could eat I guess."

"I know a place just around ta corner if you don't mind."

"No, I don't mind."

"Great, shall we go t'en?"

"Okay." Nolee shrugged as she adjusted her coat. The guilt she felt previously that day reared its ugly head again. She felt her stomach tighten as she looked at him getting ready to smoke a cigarette. Kira's words echoed in her mind to her dismay.

'He deserves to know.'

She inhaled a deep breath and attempted to gather up her courage. "Murphy?"

"Yes lass?" he answered gently looking her way.

"I umm have somethin' to tell you."

"Okay...what is it?" he inquired putting his lighter back in his coat pocket. Nolee shuffled on her and willed the words to come out.

"I umm...just wanted to tell you that...I'll go to the Halloween party." she answered with disappointment, the little courage she had vanishing.

"Oh, well cool t'en." he responded with a smile. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah..." she whispered and began to follow him back to the subway, the guilt eating at her as she kept her head down.

How was she going to do this?