Status: in progress!! // uhhh i have strong feelings for hifudo


train station


Hifumi should be at work now, Doppo figures. He left about an hour ago, so he should be there.

Since he left, Doppo’s been laying in his spot on the floor, legs hidden beneath the kotatsu as he stares at the television. It’s a drama that he dropped a few weeks ago, but apparently it’s been picking up speed in terms of plot. Maybe he should get interested in it again. He’s always looking for something to do when he’s home alone.

He‘s trying to give it his undivided attention in the hopes of getting attached to it, but he can’t. There’s that feeling that he can’t stop himself from getting pulled into, the same one that took him over when he stepped on the train this morning. Something is off, isn’t it? Something is wrong, isn’t it?

He should have told Hifumi about it, he knows he should have, but why would he want Hifumi to shoulder his negativity? There’s nothing to say, anyway. It’s not even important.

Even though it made him skip work.

Even though it scared him.

It’ll probably pass. He’s always like this.


It hasn’t passed yet.

In fact, he thinks it’s getting stronger.

Something is very wrong. Isn’t it?


”Do-ppo! I’m so tired.”

“Don’t wake up so early anymore.”

He can just see Hifumi’s cheeks puff out as he pouts. It’s a welcome distraction from his thoughts, talking to Hifumi. He’s been trying to pay better attention to the drama on the tv, but those attempts stopped working about an hour ago. Hifumi really is the only thing that can take his mind off of anything.

”That wasn’t my fault. It just happened!“

Doppo thinks he can hear someone trying to call Hifumi back, but it must not be important because Hifumi is still wasting time taking to him.

”Anyhow! How’re you? You getting sleepy yet?”

“Kinda... Not as much as I usually am, though.” Surprisingly, all of the exhaustion from earlier has melted away. He couldn’t feel more alert, which is a little strange. He could probably attribute that to the odd sense of unease that’s grabbed hold of him all day. It’s hard to even think about sleep when he gets like this. It’s never really been this intense before, but he’s sure it’s just one of his worse days.

”Really? Hey, maybe you’ll– Uh, hold on, okay?”

It seems the person that was calling Hifumi has finally gotten through to him. Doppo wonders what they wanted. Is it something bad? Maybe this is what his bad feeling was leading up to?

”I’m back! Sorry about that, I just needed to help someone find something. But anyway, if you’re not sleepy yet, maybe you’ll be awake when I come back!”

“Yeah. No promises, though.”

”Of course not. If Doppochin gets sleepy at any point, go to sleep! Don’t force yourself to stay up. I know you’re tired.”

Tired from what? Skipping out on work? Walking around? He should just tell him that he didn’t go. It would probably ease at least a little of his worry, being honest with Hifumi. But then he’d have to explain why, which he still doesn’t fully know himself, and it might make Hifumi worry, and while he’s at work, too. So he just shuts up.

”I have to go back to work now,” Hifumi says, disappointment clear in his voice. The music behind him is muted and soft, but for some reason it feels like it’s going to drown him out. Doppo...really doesn’t want him to hang up. When Hifumi leaves, so does his peace of mind. ”I’ll call you back if I get a little more free time, okay? I love you!”

“I love you, too,” he says with no hesitation. Even if it means Hifumi will end the call, he can’t hold himself back. He’s not the greatest partner. The least he can do is let Hifumi know he loves him whenever possible. “Bye.”

”Bye-bye! Get some rest!”

And then he’s gone. And Doppo’s back to having to distract himself, which hasn’t worked that well so far. Maybe he should just force himself to go to sleep. He can’t do anything wrong if he’s asleep. But he knows he can’t, not when he’s this awake.

So what should he do?


hifumi: what?? you’re out this late??? (´;Д;`)

hifumi: where are you going? be careful!

doppo: convenience store. it’s not far from home. and then i’ll go right back.

hifumi: okayyy (ノωヽ) stay safe!

Doppo decides not to text him back. Chances are, Hifumi isn’t in a position to be talking to him now and might be risking a lecture or something by being on his phone. He isn’t exactly sure what proper host protocol is, but he’s fairly positive that being on your phone isn’t part of it.

He isn’t really sure why he’s going to the store so late; there are snacks at home, there’s enough food to throw together something fast, and even though he’s not really tired, he should be going to sleep. But staying home alone was starting to get more uncomfortable. It’s something he does all the time, but tonight - just like everything else today - feels wrong. Hifumi won’t be back until one or two in the morning, and he knows he won’t stay out until then, but even this little trip to a convenience store is a time killer.

Speaking of, the store is within sight now. A few steps away, in fact. Oddly enough, so is that boy from the weird shop earlier. At least, Doppo thinks it’s him. Blue hair, a green jacket with a fluffy hood. He’s lingering by the door, a cigarette hanging from his mouth. It doesn’t look lit.

What Doppo should do is walk ahead, wave at the boy on his way into the store. It’s not like he’s obligated to stand and talk.

But. He’s been making pretty stupid decisions today, hasn’t he?

Besides, the boy notices him first, anyway, so what is he supposed to do?

“Hey, you’re the guy from earlier, right?” he asks once he looks up, his voice stopping Doppo in his tracks. “You live over here?” When Doppo shrugs, he nods, dropping his eyes for a bit. “Yeah, that was kinda nosy. But, hey, I...uh, I’m glad I ran into someone.”

“Why?” And then, because Doppo has already dug himself this far, “What’s wrong?”

“I. Um. Do you know where the closest train station is?”

The boy sounds so different than he did at the shop; all of his confidence is gone, replaced with something shaky and almost afraid. Doppo knows it pretty well.

“Yeah, it’s not too far. It’s kinda late...are you by yourself?” When Doppo looks at him, he looks even younger than he did earlier. Chances are, he’s not too much younger, but definitely more than a few years. Doppo takes a breath, tries to ignore this strange weight on his shoulders, and turns opposite the store.

“Yep. I’m supposed to meet someone there, but I agreed without really knowing where to go. I made this far following directions on my phone, but...” The boy shakes his head and runs a hand over his face before taking the cigarette out. It’s not even a cigarette. It’s the stick of a lollipop. “I was gonna go in there and ask for directions, but. Then you showed up, so.”

Well. Doppo is looking for ways to waste time.

“I can take you.”

“Really? I-I mean, directions would be okay. You don’t...y’know, have to.”

Doppo shakes his head, giving the boy a smile that he hopes looks nice enough. He only ever really smiles at Hifumi and Hifumi’s too kind to say anything about it.

“It’s fine. We should get started, though.”

Hifumi might berate him for this later. Or maybe he’ll be happy that Doppo stepped out of his comfort zone and offered to help someone he doesn’t know.

Whichever it is, Doppo will just be happy to see him when the time comes.


“Why would your friend make you meet them so late?”

“He’s just getting back from some trip. And he’s a jerk. He just called me, like, “Oh, you’re still awake? Good. Come pick me up,” like, what?”

“Oh. He sounds nice.”


“We’re here now.”

Doppo looks over to Dice - what an interesting name -, who looks. Odd. Uncomfortable. At least, compared to how much he’s relaxed during the majority of the walk.

“Are you...okay?”

“Huh? Y-Yeah, I’m fine. Station’s kinda empty, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess. It’s late, so...”

Dice nods, rubbing the back of his neck. He was pretty quiet on the way over, save for the short chatter about this friend he’s supposed to meet. Perhaps Doppo just makes him uneasy. It’s a fair assumption.

“Hey, I gotta use the bathroom right quick. Do you mind staying here for a minute? Just to call me if the train comes. So I can hurry up,” Dice says in a rush, averting his gaze once again. Doppo can’t be making him this nervous, can he? He’s never really thought of himself as an intimidating person; people usually bother him more than he bothers them.

“Sure.” It’s not like he has anywhere to be but the store and home. “I’ll wait.”

Dice’s smile is very unconvincing, but he claps his hands together and goes, “Thanks, man,” before leaving.

Doppo realizes once Dice is gone that he’ll have to walk all the way back on his own. If he speedwalks, he can probably turn the twenty minute walk into fifteen or so. Then again, he’s not really in the mindset for that; he spent all his energy accompanying Dice, who is a lot faster than he’s comfortable with. Oh, well. He’ll probably be alright.

The feeling that’s been following him all day, that unusual dread, has all but vanished in the last few moments. He doesn’t understand why or where it’s gone, but he’s grateful. Sort of. He wants to be, really, but the fact that it’s gone just like that makes him feel weirder. Was there really nothing to worry about? There never is, usually, but this. It didn’t feel usual.

Well. Regardless. It was nothing, like he said.


The train is pulling in.

The station is empty, save for a few stragglers here and there. It’s late, sure, but Doppo always assumed places like this never saw peace. The city is busy, after all.

He leaves his spot against the wall for the bathroom in search of Dice, already preparing his nerves for when he has to walk back home alone. He’s not really nervous, though. Though everything else tries, the night has never really scared him.

“Oi...Dice-kun. The train’s here,” he says once he makes it, poking in just enough to see. The urinals are abandoned, meaning Dice is probably in one of the stalls (if he hasn’t left to wander around or something).

Doppo takes a few steps further, hands in his pockets. He still hasn’t changed from his work clothes. He meant to do that the moment he got home this afternoon, but. Time slipped away.

“Dice-kun? Are you in here anymore or...?”

He feels as though glancing at the bottom of the stalls for a sign of someone may be a bit invasive, but he has to. He at least needs to know if he’s talking to the walls.

Sure enough, he doesn’t see Dice’s shoes. The boy must have started to walk around or something to waste time.

Doppo sighs quietly. Now he’s starting to feel that exhaustion creep in again, taking control. He supposes there’s room for it now that his fear has pulled back. He doesn’t feel like searching for someone. Who knows where he could’ve—


There’s a pain. Sharp, concentrated, right in his back.

He hardly gets a chance to cry out; someone’s cold hand latches roughly onto his face, slapped over his mouth. All of his scream fall into their palm.

He’s only standing for a moment, slowly falling to his knees. The center of the pain drags upwards as he moves down, but only for a moment. It changes into a burning sting once he touches the ground. It hurts so goddamned bad, even when whatever has struck him is snatched away.

Doppo can only remain on his knees for a moment, so he makes the most of it, trying to turn as much as he can without agitating anything. It fails and he yells into that hand again, but.

Through newly blurred vision, he can see a green jacket sleeve when he tries.

Doppo can’t say the boy’s name, doesn’t have the mind to, but he figures it’s fine, because he can hear Dice breathing shakily behind him. He can hear Dice muttering, too, something full of hatred and he can’t understand what he‘s done to Dice, if anything at all, but his mind is so everywhere, maybe he just doesn’t remember. Was the walk that terrible? Perhaps he said something he shouldn’t have. One of the five words he said must have struck a horrible nerve.

He wants to tell Dice that the train is here, that he’s sorry if he offended him, but he can’t. Speaking is hard, moving is hard, all he can do is try to block out how much everything hurts.

Dice’s hand drops, his arm moving down to catch Doppo when he falls forward. His grip has changed now, careful and hesitant. He’s holding Doppo completely different, nothing like the harsh and angry hold he had just moments ago. Maybe he’s not upset anymore.

The stinging is trying to transform into a sort of throbbing, intense and awful, and he can’t imagine suffering through it. So he closes his eyes and tries to block it out, hoping it’ll just go away.

It hurts so much.

Dice is still talking above him. Apparently, he’s been going for a minute, but Doppo hasn’t been able to put any attention towards it. He hears something like metal or steel hit the tile, too, somewhat. He doesn’t know what it is and he doesn’t really care.

There’s a moment where Dice seems to forget he’s holding Doppo, because he drops his arm and then yelps when Doppo hits the floor. His words become a bit clearer to Doppo then, like he’s been jolted awake. “Oh, shit, I didn’t mean that. H-hey, you gotta stay awake, okay? You’re losing...too much blood to nap.”

Doppo is trying to stay awake, if only to attempt to fish out the reason Dice was so incredibly angry minutes ago. But it’s hard. Everything’s hard. He doesn’t really want to stay awake as much as he thought.

”If Doppochin gets sleepy at any point, go to sleep!”

Can he do that? It sounds really nice. Hifumi always knows what’s best for him.

Dice is shaking him now, but miraculously, he doesn’t feel as much pain anymore. Nothing is sticking, not even Dice’s frantic, trembling voice, not even Dice’s tears. “Oi! Keep your eyes open!”

Eventually, everything stops.


hifumi: doppo! are you back home yet? i’m gonna be off reeeeeally soon!


hifumi: doppooooo answer meeeee! ;^;


hifumi: DUH i forgot you fall asleep! good night! i’ll see you soon! i love you (*´꒳`*)
♠ ♠ ♠
did that seem sudden. i hope so. :) did that seem like it came out of absolutely nowhere & super random. hee. :) all i can promise is that this was planned & not an asspull. :)

i don’t think?? i introduced any new terms in this chapter, but i really need to stop updating at midnight or right before. (it’s like 11:40 right now HKSJSKSJS) but it’s okay! i’m having fun, ahhh.

thank you sosososo much to limewire virus for commenting, i’m super grateful! (=´∀`) & thank you so much for reading!! love you all <3

- amina (nikko)