Breaking the Habit

I walked into the house, closing the door softly.
I wasn’t even sure if Gabi was home, but I didn’t want to take the chance of being lectured if she was.
I walked up the stairs as quietly as possible to my bedroom, and locked the door behind me.

Finally, breathing a sigh of relief, I stripped out of last night’s clothes and took a shower.
I was drying my hair when I heard a knock on my bedroom door.
“Mick, you in there?” Gabi called.
“Just got out of the shower Gabs, hang on.” I yelled.
I twisted my hair in the towel ontop of my head and unlocked the bedroom door.
“When did you get home?” She asked.
“About an hour ago, why?” I asked.
“Because when I fell asleep in my room, you weren’t here, and when I woke up, I heard your shower running.” She said.
“I came home and thought I needed a shower, is there a problem with that?” I asked.
She gave me a look, “Where have you been?” She asked calmly.
“With a friend, why does it matter?” I asked, shaking my hair out.
“Because you were drinking last night and you’re not known for making the best decisions when you’re drunk.” She replied.
“Okay, so I was with a friend that I also had sex with last night.” I shrugged.
“Honestly, I’m glad dad made you get on birth control. It worries me how many kids you’d have If he hadn’t.” She sat on my bed.
I rolled my eyes, “If I weren’t on birth control, I’d make sure and use protection.” I said.
“No you wouldn’t, when you drink you don’t think about things like that.” She said.
“Gabi, I’m grown, I don’t need you or dad hovering over me anymore.” I said.
“So were just supposed to let you do whatever and end up pregnant by some low-life who’s going to leave you to raise a kid by yourself when you’re obviously not mature enough to take care of a child, you barely take care of yourself.” She snapped.
“He’s not a low-life! He’s a good guy, and he cares about me. I’ve been terrified of dating ever since William, but I’m finally ready to try it again, and nobody, not you, not dad, NOBODY is going to stop me from trying to be happy. We both know that we’re not ready for kids, but we care deeply for each other and we’re going to try and make this work.” I yelled back.
“Who are you talking about? The guy from last night?! Michelle you don’t even know him! You’ve slept with him one time! You can’t seriously think that this guy is boyfriend material!” She yelled.
“Three times. And yes I do think he’s boyfriend material. Matter of fact, he may just be husband material but we’ll get to that later on.” I replied calmly.
“Three times what?” She asked.
“Well, more than that actually.” I replied shrugging.
“Three times WHAT Michelle?” She asked angrily.
“I’ve fucked him more than three times, Gabi! I think we did it twice last night and we did it twice today!” I yelled.
“What?!?! That’s where you’ve been? Spreading your legs for some random dude who you think you’re in love with?! And what do you mean you “think” you did it twice last night? You don’t know?” She asked.
“I do love him, Gabi! And he loves me! And I was very, very drunk last night. I don’t remember anything that happened. It was one of those nights.” I said.
“Michelle, how do you know he didn’t roofie you or something?! You’re gorgeous, of course he’s going to be “in love” with you. Until he gets bored and then he’s going to toss you aside like a piece of trash.”
“Because you know so much, Gabi.” I snapped.
“I do! That’s why I have Ryder, and I live with you! Because James wanted me long enough to satisfy him, and then he was gone. I got pregnant with Ryder and he vanished. I don’t want that to happen to you!” She yelled.
“That’s not going to happen to me!” I cried.
“Because you’re on birth control, I know. But if you forget even once, to take that pill and you sleep with him, you’ll be right where I am.”
My phone rang.
“It’s dad, so shut up.” I glared at her.
“Hey dad.” I said.
“Hey Mick. I gotta cancel dinner tonight, Ashleigh is in labor and we’re flying to Houston. I’m sorry.”
“No dad, I completely understand. Tell Ashleigh and Nick I said congratulations, and I’ll come visit as soon as I have the free time.” I said.
“Let your sister know. And we love you both.”
“I’ll tell Gabi, and we love you guys too, dad.” I said.
“Okay Bye Mickey.”
“Bye dad.”

I looked at Gabi, “Do I have to repeat all of that, or did you hear it?” I asked.
“I heard. It’s fine, I’ll just go see Chauntelle.” She sighed, standing up.
“Whatever. Just keep your nose out of my love-life Gabi. I know what I’m doing.”
She rolled her eyes, “Whatever Michelle, I’ll be in Sacramento.” She left the room, closing the door behind her.
I dug the piece of paper out of my pocket, and dialed the number.
“Hello?” He asked.
“Hey babe, it’s me.”
“Oh, hey! I wasn’t really expecting you to call this soon. What’s up?” He asked.
“My dad cancelled dinner, because he and my step-mom are flying to Texas where my step-sister is about to have a baby. So I’m free tonight. What about you?” I asked.
“I didn’t have plans. Probably order pizza and lay on the couch watching TV. Is that something you’d be interested in joining me for?” He asked.
“How about I cook you dinner and we spend some time together?” I asked.
“My kitchen isn’t fit for cooking right now, love.”
He chuckled.
“So I’ll come over and clean it.” I shrugged.
He laughs, “Okay, I’ll pick you up when I finish up here.” He said.
“Or, I can go ahead to your place and get it cleaned up.” I suggested.
“The spare key is under the potted plant on the porch. And don’t judge the amount of dishes in my sink, I was a bachelor until recently, we don’t clean much.” He laughed.
“No judgement here babe. My kitchen gets pretty bad sometimes too. I’ll see you tonight. I’ll wear something naughty for you.”
“Oh don’t tease me, Michelle.” He groaned.
“Bye babe.” I hung up.

I threw on my jeans and a nice blouse and spruced my hair up, fixed my face and grabbed my car keys and an overnight bag, because let’s face it, I was spending the night and we both knew it.
I threw in some of my sexier night things and headed out the door.

I found the key, and let myself into the house.
I set my bag on the couch and went into the kitchen.
The counters were full of empty take out containers, fast food bags and dirty dishes and the stove looked like it hadn’t been touched in ages.
I looked under the sink for cleaning supplies, only to find he had none, so I got back in the car and headed to the store, arming myself with everything I’d need to clean the house, because I knew that I wasn’t going to stop with just the kitchen.

First, I filled up four trash bags with the take out containers and other trash, carried them out, scrubbed the stove down and boiled water while I swept all the floors.
I dusted all of the living room furniture and vacuumed the rug the best I could.
I washed the dishes in the sink, dried them and put them away, then I dumped the boiling water in the sink with some floor cleaner and mopped the sticky crusty floors.
Then I tackled the countertops and microwave before moving on to the bathroom.

I was finished cleaning and starting dinner when I heard the front door open.
“Hey babe.” I greeted him with a smile and a kiss when he walked in the door.
“What happened to my house?” He laughed.
“I did. I thought it wasn’t that bad, but once I start cleaning, I can’t stop until it’s all done. I haven’t made it to the bedrooms yet, but it’s on my to do list. How was work?” I asked, slipping his jacket off.
“It went pretty well. Gotta go back tomorrow. I mean wow babe, my house hasn’t looked this good since I moved into it. You did an amazing job!” He kissed me.
“Thanks. Another thing my mother was, was an insane clean freak. A trait she passed on to all three of her daughters.” I turned and walked into the kitchen.

“Well, at least she taught you something useful.” He followed me.
“Holy shit I have a countertop.” He laughed, running his hand across it, “And the floor! It’s not sticky and crunchy anymore! Who are you? My fairyhousekeeper?” He laughed.
“You wish.” I rolled my eyes.
“What’s cooking in here?” he asked.
“You’ll just have to wait and see.” I said.
“Well, that’s not fair.” he kisses me, pushing me against the counter, his hands pulling my hips against him.
“Is this the game we’re playing?” I whispered, pulling his shirt off.
He chuckled, “No baby, I don’t play games. I’m straightforward about what I want.” he pressed himself against me, “But I don’t have to tell you what I want, because you already know. Because you want the same thing.” He whispered.
I bit my lip, “Baby, I’m not saying I don’t want to, but we should wait at least until I finish cooking, we don’t want me burning dinner.” I ran my hands down his back.
“Trust me, what I want to eat, isn’t going to burn.” he runs his hand up my leg into my shorts.
My body was begging me to let him take me, right there on the kitchen counter, but I knew that this was my one chance to make a good first impression with my culinary skills, and I should be paying attention to the food.
I opened my eyes, looking directly into his, and I could see the hunger, the lust, and how his body begged me.
I bit my lip, and kissed him.
I reached over and turned off the stove, while he pulled his pants off.

We were rattling the cabinets when someone knocked on the door.
I stopped and looked at him, “Who the hell is that?” I asked, grabbing my shirt and jeans.
I hastily yanked my clothes back on, and turned the stove on, like I’d been cooking the whole time.
“I’m looking for my daughter, is she here? And don’t lie, because her car is parked in your driveway.”
I pulled my shirt back on and walked into the entryway.
“Dad? I thought you were going to Houston.” I said.
“Nope, I told you that so you would make other plans, and I could see if Gabi was right about how bad you’re getting again.”
“Dad, I’m still sober.” I pulled my jacket tightly around me to conceal the fact that I wasn’t wearing a bra under my shirt.
“So, how did you meet this fellow?” he looked Chester up and down.
“Okay, so I drank last night. But I haven’t had a drop all day today.” I said.
“That’s not to say that you won’t. You remember how bad you were before.” He crossed his arms.
“I’m going to go check on the food babe.” Chester glanced at me, and disappeared around the corner.

I stepped forward, closing the front door behind me.
“You all have got to let me grow up and make my own decisions sometime, dad. I’m done being treated like a toddler. Stop following me around with your rule book, so you can bash it over my head when I break one.” I glared at him.
“Maybe if you acted like an adult, we’d treat you like one.” He said.
“I’m doing fine.” I argued.
“And what are you doing over here with this guy? Michelle you don’t even know him.” he said.
“I don’t, but I want to. We’re getting to know eachother better. Everyone starts out as strangers.” I shrugged.
“Yeah, you’re really getting to know each other. I saw what you’re talking about, and it seemed that he was getting very acquainted with your body on that kitchen counter. Maybe next time you decide to screw someone on their kitchen counter, close the fucking living room blinds.”

“I’m going to marry him, dad. I know it. And this time it’s going to happen. How about you don’t worry about how Chester and I spend our time together, and come to peace with the fact that I’m not 14 anymore, and you can’t control my every move as some way of protecting me from the damage that’s already been done. You were eleven years too late to save me dad, and it’s time you stopped trying to, because that ship has sailed. You let that monster stay in my life, you allowed her to destroy me, so don’t stand by and act like some kind of fucking hero for divorcing her, because it should’ve happened as soon as she hit me the first time, but you played stupid and believed her made up lies, you’re just as responsible for what happened as she is, so stop making everyone think that you’re some kind of good samaritan. I couldn't’ stop what happened back then, but I can control who has sex with me now, and I’ve chosen him. Swallow a dose of reality and back the hell off of me. If you ever want to be apart of my life or my potential children’s lives, you’d better figure out where you want to be in it, and fast, because I’m not giving anymore second chances. Now, leave my boyfriend and I alone, or I will see to it that you never see me again. If that’s not a dealbreaker, then your decision is already made, and you should leave.” I turned and walked inside, slamming the door in his face, and throwing myself against it.
I sank to the floor, tears overflowing my eyelids, sobs shaking my chest.
Chester came to my rescue, “Are you okay?” He asked, sitting down and pulling me into his arms.
“I’ve got to get out of here. I’ve got to get away from all of them, at least for a little while.” I sobbed almost incoherently.
“We’ll get you away from here baby.” he petted my hair, speaking softly to me.
My dad started beating on the door with his fist.
“Get the hell out of here!” I screamed.
“You’re not cutting me out of your life because you’re think you’re in love. You’re going to need me even more when he up and leaves you like the last guy did.” he yelled.
Chester’s face changed, and the kind man I’d been with earlier was gone, replaced by anger and rage.
He helped me to my feet and tucked me behind him as he swung the door open, “I am not going to leave her. I’d never do anything in this world to hurt her, but it seems like you and your family have made it a pastime. I want to love her, protect her, make her happy. I want to show her what real love feels like, which apparently you’re incapable of doing, so maybe she doesn’t need any of you in her life, but she has me, and that will be more than enough to make for the shitty excuse of a family she came from. We are going to get married one day, and have a family, and if I see you at the wedding or the birth of our children, so help me God, you’re going to need a miracle, because I’m not letting you people inject the same venom into my family that you’ve put in her, it’s no wonder she’s an alcoholic. It’s no wonder she’d rather not have to remember her childhood. Where the fuck were you when she was being held down, against her will, by men twice and three times her age while your wife watched and laughed in her face. Where were you when she tried to put a gun in her mouth, than go through that for another second? Huh, where the FUCK WERE YOU JACK?! Because you weren’t there for your daughter when she needed you most, and she doesn’t need you now. You have thirty seconds to get the hell off my porch before I call the police and have you arrested for harassment. Do not try and contact her anymore. She made it clear that she doesn’t want you around, so you should remove yourself from her life, because you’ve never done anything to help her anyway.” he slammed the door shut and took off down the hall to his room.

“What are you doing?” I asked through tears.
“Packing. When I get finished, we’re going to get all of your stuff from your house, and bringing it here, then you’re going to pack a bag too, because tomorrow morning, we’re leaving.” He continues to throw clothes into a bag as I stand in the doorway.
He stops, drops his bag and turns to me, “I am never going to let them hurt you again. You don’t deserve that, you’ve been through enough because of them, and you need to be happy. If it kills me, I am going to keep you safe, and happy.” he kissed me, and then hugged me tightly.
I buried my face in his shirt, “You hardly know me, and you’re trying to save me. I’m so sorry I dragged you into this, it wasn’t my intention.”
“Don’t you dare apologize. I’m the one who’s sorry. Sorry that I didn’t find you and save you from that heinous family sooner. Sorry that those awful things happened to you. Sorry that you think that you deserve all of this because your mother was a psycho who couldn’t love her own child out of jealousy. That’s over. Your new life, your happy life, with me, starts tomorrow morning. And you’re not going to look back.” he said.
“Where are we going to go?” I asked.
“We’re going to do something crazy, something we probably shouldn’t do, and then we’re getting the hell out of California for ten months. That’s long enough time to let all of this blow over.”
“Are you going to tell me the crazy thing we’re doing? Since I am going to be doing it too, I think I should be in on the plan.” I looked up at him.
He wiped my tears, smiled down at me and kissed me, “We’re going to elope.”