Sun-Kissed

Owen pulled up to my house after our date at about eleven-thirty. I told him that we really didn’t need to come back before midnight, but he insisted, telling me that he didn’t want to get on my family’s bad side. He walked me up to my door as a proper date would. It was like what you always imagine what the end of a date is. He was a little taller than me, so as we stood in front of the door he kind of looked down at me. He smiled and my knees almost buckled.
“I had a really, really great time with you tonight. Thank you for saying yes to me.”
“Thank you,” I say. “I haven’t been on many dates, but this has by far been the best one.”
He hadn’t stopped smiling. He took his hands to my waist and pulled me so close to him that a flea wouldn't fit between us. He bent his head down and planted the softest kiss onto my lips. I wrapped my arms around his waist and embraced him, resting my head right under his.
“I’ll call you tomorrow,” he said before planting a kiss on my forehead and walking back to his car. As he got to his car, he turned around once to look back at me and then finally got in.
When I walked into the house. Victor and Lorena were on the couch. Waiting for me I presumed. I remember being really afraid that Lorena had told Victor. He would have for sure told our dad. I put my keys in my pocket and walked over. I was cautious.
“What’s up, guys?” I asked, sitting on a chair across from them.
“We’re waiting for you to get back from your date.” He said with a mischevious smile.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m going to go to bed.”
“Aw, come on. Not even a hint? You can’t even show us a picture. Who is this girl?”
“Vic, if I wanted you to know who I went on a date with, I would have told you when I called you earlier. Back off.” I was started to get annoyed with him.
“Hey, fucker, what’s with the attitude? You better bring that shit down.”
“Fuck you, Vic. You’re not dad, no matter how much you try to be.”
“Hey, calm down,” said Lorena.
“I don’t need this shit. I was just curious about my little brother’s life.”
Victor walked out and slammed the door. Lorena looked at me with a disappointed stare. “Danny you need to tell him.”
“Are you kidding me? He’ll definitely tell dad.”
“Dad is going to find out sooner or later. You might as well get it over with. At least he doesn’t live here anymore, so he can’t kick you out.”
“Lori, this isn’t your business. It’s my thing to tell and I’ll do it when I’m read. Now back the fuck off.”
I got up and walked back to my room. My brother and sister had completely ruined my amazing first date, and I wasn’t sure if I was going to forgive them. At least not for a really long time.

I woke up the next morning to my mother sitting on the side of my bed. It would be creepy if my mother wasn’t such a sweet woman. She started me a little which made her smile. I could tell that her depression was taking a toll on her. Her face didn’t have much color and she looked tired. She put a hand on my leg.
“Lorena told me that you went on a date last night.” She said. I nodded my head in silence. “Who is he?”
“What did Lorena say?” I asked as I sat up in shock.
“Lorena didn’t need to tell me anything. I’m your mother, mijo. I carried you in my body for nine months. I nursed you. It’s a connection like nothing else in the world. I know my children, all three of you.”
I could feel myself start to cry. My mother wrapped her arms around me tight. “Shhhh, no llores, mijo.”
“Mama, please don’t tell dad,” I pleaded while still crying and still in her embrace.
“Don’t you worry about your father. We hardly even speak anymore. I just want you to be happy and I want you to be open with me. As much as it is ok more and more every day for people like you, it can still be dangerous. So, I wanna meet this boy that you went out with.”
“Mom, we went on one date. I think it’s a little soon to meet the parents. Can you wait until we’ve been on like three at least?”
She smiled skeptically. “Okay, but three dates is all I’ll wait. I’ll be keeping track. Now get up. Lorena is making pancakes.”
After I brushed my teeth, I walked over to sit at the breakfast table. Lorena was in the kitchen flipping pancakes and crisping bacon. My mom served me a cup of coffee and sat down next to me.
“Lori…,” I started to apologize.
“Hey, booger, you want bacon?”
I smiled. “Yeah.”
After breakfast, I got a call. I jumped up, thinking it was Owen. It was Robbie. He wanted to know how the date went. He came over not long after our call and took me out. We stopped at one of our favorite boba places to get some drinks. He knew I wouldn’t want to talk about my date around my mom and Lorena, no matter how much they knew.
“So you woke up and your mom was right there and she just knew...like she just knew?” Robbie asked as we sipped on our boba drinks.
“Yeah, she said it was like mother’s intuition or something.”
“Holy shit…”
Robbie had this long-ish brown hair. It covered his ears at least. His skin was this shade of brown that was somewhere between almond and honey that glowed perfectly in the sunlight. His eyes were this bright green that brought a lightness to his face even when he was sad. He looked kind of thin on the outside, but he was totally ripped because he was always working out at the gym. He always wants me to go with him, but the thought of being at the gym with all those hot guys around me always kept me away.
“Anyway, how did the date go?”
“At first I felt kind of awkward because he took me to this super fancy restaurant and said that he was going to pay for everything.”
“Fuck, is he, like, rich?”
“I mean he does go to Shoreline.”
“Oh yeah, he’s a rich private school kid. Hey did you ever hear back from that scholarship contest?”
I had nearly forgotten that I had written an essay for a scholarship to Shoreline Preparatory Acadamy for my last two years of high school. It was still too early to hear from the contest because I had turned it in at the beginning of May and they said that they would notify the winners in July. All of the mess of my parents’ divorce plus the excitement of going on a date with Owen almost made me forget about that completely.
“No, they said they would contact the winners in July.”
“Dude that would be so cool if you won. Then you’d go to the same school as Owen.”
“You applied too, maybe we’ll both win. They’re picking five winners,” I reassure him.
“Let’s face it, the chances of us both winning is very slim. You have the better grades, you’re the better writer. You’re going to definitely win.”
At that moment is when I got the phone call from Owen. Normally I would have excused myself from the table to talk with him, but I was only with Robbie and I wasn’t embarrassed to talk to Owen in front of him.
“Hey what’s up?” He asked when I answered.
“I’m just out having some boba with Robbie.”
He stayed silent for a little longer than I expected. “Oh, that’s cool. Are you telling him all the dirty details about last night?” He lightly chuckled.
“I’m giving him the Cliff’s Notes,” I say.
“Maybe don’t mention the part where I decked one of my best friends.”
“Oh but that’s the best part.”
He got really serious. “No...No it isn’t. I’m not proud of what I did...But...I’d do it again if he ever said another word about you like that.” I didn’t really know what to say to him after that. “Sorry, I’ll let you have your drink with Robbie.”
“Wait, can I call you later? I wanted to tell you something.”
“Sure,” he replied. “Bye.”
“Bye.”
“That sounded weird,” said Robbie as I ended the call.
“He seemed a little sad,” I added.
“Maybe we should head back so you can call him.”
“I think that’s a good idea.”

When I arrived back home, I got a text message from Owen. He asked me to meet him at my spot. I borrowed Lorena’s car and drove myself there. When I got there, he was already there, sitting on the sand and looking out at the ocean. I walked over and sat next to him. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t even look at me. He did reach over, take my hand and bring it over into his lap. We sat in silence for a couple of minutes, just watching the ocean lap against the shore.
“I went to Cody’s place today to apologize,” said Owen, finally breaking the silence.
“How did it go?”
“Not good.”
“I’m sorry this is all my fault.”
He squeezed my hand. “Don’t blame yourself. This isn’t your fault.”
“You’re fighting with one of your best friends over me.”
“Don’t worry about that. That’s his problem.” He paused. “You had something to tell me?”
“Oh...it doesn’t matter.”
I decided to not tell Owen about the scholarship contest, because if I didn’t win I didn’t want to disappoint him and if I did I thought it would be nice to surprise him on the first day of school. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and let me lean into him. We sat silent again for a couple of minutes and then he broke the silence again.
“So, am I really the guy of your dreams?”
I could feel my face get really warm. “Oh my god. You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
He smiled, “But I did.”
I rolled my eyes. “Okay, well, I mean, if I really have to admit it, then yes. You’re pretty much like the ideal guy I always pictured in my head.”
It was going to his head. He had a cocky smile painted all over his face. I playfully punched him in the gut for being so damn cute. Then he grabbed my fist, pulled me into him and kissed me. The kiss lasted longer than I expected, but I wasn’t complaining. I could feel this intense energy between us. Guys that I’ve kissed before had always been just experiments. They were gay and I was gay and so we kissed or went on dates. It was different with Owen. It was high energy and exciting and like nothing I’ve ever felt.
When we were done, I asked him if he wanted to go out with me again. He agreed. I told him that this time I was paying. He smiled that incredible smile at me. When I blushed he asked me why and I told him that his smile made me crazy.
“You make me crazy.”
“Shut up,” I said as I playfully shoved him.
“No, it’s true. After that first night that we met here, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I still can’t.”

* * *

I became more comfortable with who I was, mostly because of being with Owen. I started to feel bad about how I treated Victor. I took it upon myself to drive to his house one day. It was around six in the evening and the sun was just starting to get low. I knocked on his door and his wife Becca answered. She’s a sweet white lady with long brown hair and pale skin, she’s got a thin frame and she’s rather tall.
“Hey, Danny, what’s up?”
“Is Vic here? I need to see him.”
“You know he really isn’t happy with you right now.”
I looked down in shame. “I know. That’s why I’m here.”
She looked at me with sympathy. “Okay, come on in. He’s in the backyard cleaning the pool.” She stepped aside.
I walked in and immediately walked through the house and into the backyard. The door to their backyard was a sliding glass door. When I shut the door, Victor turned around, saw me, and then turned back around to continue cleaning the pool with one of those long-handled nets.
“Vic, can we talk for a second?”
Normally, I would have just come over with a couple of his favorite cheeseburgers for us to eat and that would have been the end of it. We don’t really do a lot of apologizing in our family, at least formal apologies. But, because I knew that I not only had to apologize, I had to also come out to him, this was going to have to be more formal.
“What? No cheeseburgers from Randy’s?”
“Please, can we sit and talk?”
He had this outdoor table set. It was a round metal table and matching metal chairs. He put down the net next to the pool and walked over to the table. The chairs clinked and scraped against the cement as we sat down. He sat down across from me.
“What is it?” He asked.
“First of all, I want to apologize for the things I said to you.”
“Oh, an actual apology this time. Looks like you’re growing up,” he said sarcastically.
“Please, Vic. What I’m trying to do is really hard for me.”
“Sorry…”
“I’ve just been on edge lately because there have been a lot of things have been going through my head lately.” I took a deep breath. “I went on a date with a guy...his name is Owen.”
He just stared for a second and then chuckled a little. “Good one, good one Danny. You had me for a second.”
“Vic, I’m not joking. I’m gay. I like guys.”
He stopped smiling. “Ok, this isn’t funny anymore.”
“It’s not a joke. Please, Victor, this is really hard for me.”
His face got really serious. “Holy shit, are you serious?”
“I was being extra snappy at you because I didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid that you would tell dad. I’m telling you because you deserve an apology and an explanation, but please don’t tell dad. That’s all I’m asking of you.”
The expression on his face changed to confusion. “Who else knows?”
“Robbie was the first person I ever told. Lori and mom know too. That’s it.”
His body language told me that he was very uncomfortable. “I think I’m gonna need a whole to process this. You...you should go.”
I didn’t say anything. I just got up and walked back into the house. Becca was watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians in the tv room. I passed to say goodbye.
“Did you boys work it out?” She asked.
“I don’t know. I hope so,” I answered.
She looked worried. She got up to walk me out of the house. She gave me a reassuring hug and smile and sent me off. I drove off to be by myself, but I didn’t want to go to my spot so I drove myself to the pier and looked for the nearest coffee spot. It was called Beach Beans and it was definitely very beachy on the inside. There were decorative surfboards and seashells. The walls were painted ocean blue. I ordered an iced coffee from a barista that was wearing a Hawaiian shirt. His name was Evan. When he called my name for the coffee, he slid me a cookie as well.
“I didn’t order this,” I said.
“It’s on me. You look like you need it.”
I smiled. “Thanks.”
I sat alone at a table for two. I opened the cookie as I sipped my coffee. It was a chocolate chip cookie. Chocolate chip used to be my favorite as a kid. It reminded me of my childhood and how simple everything was. I didn’t have to worry about boys or being gay or saying the wrong thing. The only thing I was ever worried about as a kid was getting to watch my favorite cartoon or getting to ride my bike with Robbie. I took a bite of that cookie and it was probably the best cookie I had ever had.

It was a week before I heard from Victor again. A lot had happened since I came out to him. Owen and I went on our second date. I took him to see the new Spider-Man movie that came out with Andrew Garfield. I didn’t think I could ever see anyone besides Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man, but Garfield did a pretty good job. Owen said he liked it too. He held my hand through the entire thing which made my whole body tingle. Afterward the movie, I took us to a dive that was close to the pier where this local band was playing.
The band that playing was like a mixture of Taking Back Sunday and My Chemical Romance with that was even possible; they were called Planet Death. It was an eighteen and up show, but one of Lorena’s old boyfriends was working the door and he let us in. Owen had never been to a show like that and I hadn’t either, so I thought I would be fun for us to do something together that neither of us had ever done before.
The venue was packed. Since I was a little shorter than Owen I stood right in front of him. I was pressed up against him quite tightly because there was literally no other way we could stand. I could tell that he was nervous so I put my hands back and reached for his. We entwined our fingers for a second and let go as the show was about to start. Immediately the place went wild. Everyone was jumping around like crashing, banging their head and swinging their arms. It was amazing. The band was really great too. When we walked out of the show, we were so tired we could barely breathe. We were all sweaty and hot, but we still found a private spot for us to hug and make out. It was an amazing night.
Two days after that was when I finally heard from Victor. He came to the house but didn’t come in. He stayed in his car and called me to come out. I had no idea how it was going to go. I knew that he at least never told dad because if he had I would have definitely heard from him by then.