You're All I Need

I allowed myself to bend just a bit after kicking them out of my house. That had happened four nights ago, and none of them had tried to contact me since then. It was honestly killing me. For the past three years, I had seen these men every day of my life. Now, when I say I allowed myself to bend, I mean I broke down and contacted the only one I knew I could talk to at that point. Mick.

He was never in as deep as Nikki and Tommy. I found myself still able to communicate with him, because he was dealing with his demons the only way he could. Ankylosing Spondylitis. A form of arthritis that mainly effected his spine in pelvis, keeping him in a constant state of pain. From what I had noticed about him, his only way to deal with it was to drink. Of course I still worried about his well being though. Only once had I ever seen how much medication he was on for his pain, and every day I worried there would be an accident with how much he drank. But he was always careful.

It was three in the morning when it happened. When I broke down and called him. I had just gotten home from my shift working at the bar, and I spotted a hat sitting on the kitchen counter in my ratty little apartment. A top hat with a skull and cross bones on the front of it. It belonged to Mick, and he must have left it here. Somehow seeing that hat, made me realize just how real the whole situation was and made me all but dive for the phone.

"Hello?" That familiar voice all but sent chills down my spine. I had obviously woken him up, and immediately cursed myself for not waiting until at least morning to call him. "Hey there old man." I smiled, feeling the urge as if to cry coming on. Almost immediately, I could hear movement on the other side of the phone, "Lilith?"

The sun was high in the sky, and the water in the pool was the perfect temperature for just floating around. It was the most relaxing way I could think of to spend my day, however little did I know I wouldn't be relaxing for too much longer. There was music playing loud enough for me to hear it from just inside the house, I had sunglasses over my eyes and my eyes were closed as I floated on my back through the water. The mix of the volume of the music and my ears being submerged under the water made it to where I didn't even hear anyone walk through the house or into the back yard.

It was only when I felt something touch my foot that I realized I wasn't alone. The shock that was sent through my body caused me to gasp loudly and my body to lurch. Effectively causing me to get a mouthful of pool water rushing down my throat as my entire body went under the water.

When I emerged from under the water, I saw four figures on the edge of the pool. Three of them were standing looking down at me, while the third was crouched down and almost eye to eye with me when I stood up. "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me! Next time a little warning huh?" I struggled slightly to catch my breath as I pushed my dripping hair back out of my face. "Well, we did ring the door bell, you just didn't answer. Do you always leave your front door unlocked, you're getting reckless, little girl." Mick smirked, looking down at me from where he stood on the side of the pool. I simply stuck my tongue out at him before moving to get out of the water.

Sitting on one of the lounge chairs next to the stairs was a dry towel waiting for me. My body was covered in goose bumps after getting out of the water, but was put at ease once wrapped in the towel that had been sitting out in the sun absorbing that heat. Only once I was wrapped up in my towel, did I turn to take in the men who were standing in front of me. They were so much different than they were all those years ago.

Mick was closest to me, and I couldn't believe what I had seen. I knew the effects his health had had on him, I heard it in the news of the music community but for some reason it did click in my mind that he would appear to be so different than before. Next was Vince, he had been the one crouched down next to the pool that had grabbed my foot. I could see it in his eyes that he had been broken, crushed down by what had happened to him. His little girl. Then there was Tommy, not the same boy he had been the last time I saw him. You could see how much he had grown and changed in his eyes and written on his face. Finally, there was Nikki, standing the furthest away from me. We had talked some over the years since he got sober, but this was the first time I had seen him in person. My heart seemed to falter and I suddenly felt like I was home.

I was surrounded by family, the people I loved and I couldn't help it. Clutching to my towel, I began to sob as I looked at all the men standing in front of me. Stepping forward Mick put his hand on my shoulder briefly as he looked over my face before pulling me into his arms. "I can't believe you're all here. I've missed you all so much." I cried very briefly before stepping back away from him. "I-I should go get dressed and then we can all catch up. You guys make yourselves at home and I'll be right back." I didn't give them the chance to say anything before turning and making my way into the house.

I made my way upstairs to the master bedroom and closed the door behind me before dropping the towel into the floor. I stripped out of my wet bathing suit as I walked over to the closet where I grabbed clean underwear and an outfit consisted of cloth pajama shorts and a thing long sleeve off the shoulder top. I ran a brush through my tangled hair before peering on the other side of the bed to see Motley and Crue curled up together on their large bed in the floor. It was a rare sight to see them down there instead of up on my bed where they sleep with me.

Smiling contently I made my way out of my bedroom, leaving the door open for when they woke up and wanted out, and rejoined the three out of the four men who were now standing in my living room.

The first one I approached was Tommy, who was standing the closest to me. "I've heard you been through a lot of ups and downs, drummer boy." I said with a sigh, looking up at him. I wasn't lying, it was hard not to hear about the infamous Motley Crue and the insane things they did while on and off of tour. These boys got everything they had wanted, they made it big with fame and fortune by making music; but that came with everything they didn't want as well.

"It's had its moments for sure; but I can see you've done well for yourself, little girl." He had an awkward smile on his face as he looked down at me. Clearly I wasn't the only one who was unsure how to act during this reunion. Especially with Tommy. Even before I kicked them out of my life all those years ago, I cannot recall Tommy and I ever having an actual conversation. Except for him hitting on me. Tommy was an attractive man, but my eyes always seemed to search for someone else. Stepping forward, I wrapped my arms around Tommy and buried my face into his chest. "I missed you guys so much." My voice was muffled, but I could feel his arms slowly wrapping around me as well.

"We missed you too, things just weren't the same without you around." Upon pulling away we smiled at each other before my eyes found Vince standing only a few feet away. Moving away from Tommy I quickly approached my brother. My mind told me to do nothing more than to wrap my arms around my brother and pull him into a hug that I knew he desperately needed; but my body seemed to have a mind of its own. My arms reached out and shoved him backwards- however seeing how much bigger than me he was, it didn't have much effect.

"Why didn't you call me when it happened?" Was the first thing to come out of my mouth, and I knew he immediately understood what I was talking about. His face seemed to drop ever so slightly, like he was ashamed of himself; and that broke my heart and made me step forward to finally wrap my arms around him. I wasn't sure if he knew it, but when Sharise first left him and took Skylar, they had come to stay with me until she could find their own place. Wanting to get to know my niece, I was quick to invite the two of them into my home.

They had only stayed with me for a few weeks, but it was time together that I cherished. When Skylar first got sick, Sharise had been the one to contact me and tell me what was happening, especially while she was waiting for Vince to show up she was so scared.

My thoughts were with that little girl, my niece. How scared she must be. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to go out to the hospital in fear of making things worse on my brother. When word reached me that Skylar was no longer with us, it had once again come from Sharise. I never heard from my brother, and had no way to contact him directly. I got a few updates on him from Mick, but never heard from him directly.

"I should have called you."His voice was gruff and strained. That is when I pulled him into my arms and held him there tightly. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes as I clutched to my older brother. It had been 18 years since we were all together like this, but up until now I don't think I realized just how much I had actually missed them all. Upon pulling away, Vince put his hands on my shoulders and held me there.

"It's been far far too long, little sister. Don't make us leave again. Things are different now, better." He was whispering now, and once the words had left his lips he looked over his shoulder briefly. My eyes followed his, only to spot Nikki sitting out next to the pool. My eyes found their way back to my brother.

"I'm still not sure if there was ever anything between the two of you, but he's never been the same. He hit rock bottom not too long after you banished us from you life. He's better now, but things were hard on him without you around." My brother was looking down at me, and I couldn't read whatever look it was he had in his eye. Almost like he was scolding me for hurting his friend and brother in such a way, but also as if trying to see if I had been hurting the same way.

Nikki and I had never actually hooked up, but there had been glances and stolen kisses here and there. The conversations we had when he was sober enough were usually deep and meaningful. I spent a majority of my time with Nikki, we had been inseparable; but in the end the drugs were still more important and that's why I couldn't be around them any more.

"Why don't you guys all stay here tonight and we can catch up? There are enough bedrooms for everyone, and I'll even make dinner." I suggested lightly. I didn't bother waiting to hear if they said yes or no before I found myself making my way back outside to where Nikki was sitting by the pool.

"You're getting old, old man. What has it been, four years, since last time I saw you?" I said with a sigh as I approached him from behind. He didn't bother turning around to look at me, just kept his eyes forward. Once I came to be next to him, I sat myself down on the edge of the pool and dipped my feet down into the cool water. He still said nothing, and didn't turn to look at me. "I don't regret making you leave, you know. It had to be done."

"Things could've gotten better without you banishing us." I had seen him a few times over the years on his own, but we had never actually had this conversation. Our previous reunions had only taken place over a matter of minutes. We could have had more, but I tried to keep my distance- not knowing if I would be something that ruined his sobriety. "No Nikki, they wouldn't have. You had to hit rock bottom before you could get better, you and I both knew that. If you would've died I don't know what I would've done with myself, so I made the decision to distance myself."

Reaching over, he placed his hand on top of my own before letting out a sigh. "You leaving was my rock bottom, you know? I didn't know what to do with myself when you weren't there." Finally he turned his head and looked at me. "You found comfort along the way." I had heard of his relationship with Vanity when she claimed they were engaged, as well as his seven year marriage to Brandi. It stung when I first found out.

Of course it had, but seeing as I had no real reason to be upset or jealous I simply tried ignoring the fact that he was with someone else. As I said before, Nikki and I were never actually together.

He almost looked hurt by my words as his bottom lip dropped open slightly and he shook his head. "None of them were you." He spoke softly now. I wasn't sure what to say, to be honest I was a bit taken back by his words. His fingers wrapped themselves around my hand before intertwining our fingers together. "I was closer than you would think. You could've found me if you really wanted to, I never went anywhere."

Leaning over, I couldn't stop myself from resting my head against Nikki's shoulder. We stayed like that in silence for a while until one of the others came outside.

"Uh, Lilith, are you aware of the two miniature horses running amok inside your house?" I heard Tommy's voice echo outside from where he stood at the sliding glass doors. I immediately laughed at his words as I made a move to stand up. Nikki seemed to have decided to move as well, as he stood up next to me and placed his arm around my shoulder before we went inside with the rest of them.

Mick was leaning against the kitchen counter, with Motley standing right up against him while Mick was scratching between his ears. He was the only one who had been to my home, and therefore the only one to know about the two very large Great Danes that shared my home. Pulling myself out of Nikki's hold, I moved about four feet away and crouched down next to Crue. "These two boys are the only ones that have shared a bed with me in years. I take care of them, and in return they keep me company and keep me safe. That one over there with Mick, his name is Motley. And this big baby over here with me, is Crue." I smiled.