Bandit Bride

Felix didn’t do too well in crowds. Especially the bustling crowds of Willsden’s marketplace. Having been born and raised in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere, large towns made him nervous and paranoid. But ever since Anthony had passed away, it left Felix in charge of his late older brother’s duties. He anxiously jumped nearly a foot when he felt a hand on his shoulder, spinning around and seeing his contact standing before him. The man looked equally surprised, holding a small bundle tightly.

“Sorry, mate,” the man said, clearing his throat. “I’ve got the wrong man. You look like him from behind.”

“No, no,” Felix said quickly. “It’s me. I mean, I’m the one you’re looking for. You’re Neil, right?”

Neil narrowed his eyes, nodding slowly. “Where’s Anthony? Are you his brother or something?”

“Yeah,” Felix sighed. “Look, he’s indisposed at the moment. It doesn’t matter, I have your money.”

Neil still seemed skeptical, but looked over his shoulder and handed Felix the bundle, with Felix handing him a coin pouch in exchange. He weighed the money in his hand and gave Felix a brief nod before slipping back into the crowd. Felix unwrapped the bundle, seeing an assortment of vials inside. It was a strong black market healing solution, illegal for its addictive properties.

Felix pursed his lips, pocketing the bundle. Well, it wouldn’t do Anthony much good now. But he wasn’t about to tell anyone about the death of his brother, if they didn’t need to know. It took a lot for Felix to talk about it with the people who DID need to know. He composed himself and ducked into the back alleys, back to the outskirts of town and into the woods. It was a relief to be back among the shade of the trees and off the roads. For whatever reason, it felt more secure. He was met by the other three members of his small crew. Lyle, Allen, and Burns looked annoyed and impatient.

“What took so long?” Allen scoffed. “We left Jack alone at camp, he’ll set it all on fire any second now. Anthony would’ve-”

“Keep his name out of your mouth,” Felix snapped harshly.

Everyone went silent. Anthony was a sore subject and they were quickly learning to not bring it up anymore. Felix sighed. Jack was alone at camp, and Felix was well aware of his younger brother’s frequent “accidents”. He was twelve now and sure that he could do more for the group to pick up what Anthony left behind, but sometimes it felt like the kid only made things more complicated for everyone. That’s why he got “important” jobs like “keeping lookout” at camp.

“Jack is fine, let’s just-“

They all instinctively went quiet when they heard the sound of a carriage passing on the road nearby, followed by a thud and rustling in the trees. Investigating the sound turned out to be a mistake. Now there was a girl tightly hugging him, though he wasn’t sure it was a girl at all. She seemed like she might have been half-cloud, with all the fluffy fabric hanging off of her.

He could feel everyone’s eyes burning holes into the back of his head as they led the runaway bride back to their camp. Anthony would’ve had the strength to turn her away, but Felix? Well, they saw the way she hugged him. He never would have been able to shake the guilt of leaving her out to die. On the trek to camp she wouldn’t stop talking, telling them all about her sisters and the preparations for her wedding. Lyle elbowed Felix in the gut, hard.

“Uh,” Felix interrupted her, closing his eyes. “Look. There’s, uh, bears. All around. So we should be quiet.”

“I thought you have to make a lot of noise to scare bears away,” she frowned.

“We don’t want to scare them away, we want to feed them,” Allen said in a flat tone.

Felix shook his head, continuing on his way. Elisa didn’t seem to take the threat to heart, seeming more excited about the prospect of running away than being with a bunch of criminals in the dark woods.

When they returned to camp, Jack ran out of the tent, a big grin on his face.

“Everything is in one piece!” he said excitedly. “No bears! And I- hey, who’s this?”

The boy peeked around Felix and at the porcelain doll that had joined them.

“It’s not important,” Felix said. “We need your clothes?”

“My clothes?” Jack frowned.

“Yeah, when it comes to sizing... well, you’re the closest to her size.”

Jack followed Elisa and Felix to the tent and the trunk of their things, frowning as Felix dug around the trunk for a shirt and trousers.

“Are you calling me scrawny?” he asked.

“I’m calling you smaller than the rest of us,” Felix snapped. “Let it go.”

He sheepishly went quiet as Felix handed Elisa the clothes.

“Alright, get changed,” he said. “And don’t try sneaking off with any of the stuff you promised, or I’ll find out.”

She nodded happily, moving behind a sheet that had been hung up to dry so she could change.

“Thanks again!” she said as she changed. “For your help and all. I don’t know where I’d be without you.”

“Without a bunch of dangerous criminals?”

“Well, I could be other places right now,” she said. “You know, all that wedding night... excitement.”

Felix’s eyes widened as the fluffy dress was tossed over the sheet, catching it out of the air and struggling to move the fabric away from his face. Jack was quiet, leaning in slowly.

“What does that mean?” he whispered. “What happens on a wedding night?”

Felix shoved the gown into the boy’s arms.

“Go put this away. Please.”

Jack waddled off with the giant bundle, struggling to see past all the fluffy fabric. A few moments later Elisa hopped out from behind the sheet, twirling around in her new boys’ clothing. She’d made some modifications to it, having torn a piece of light pink ribbon from her wedding veil and using it to tie her hair up and cinch around her waist. Felix supposed he could let that slide.

“This is so comfortable,” she said with a grin. “I’ve never worn trousers before. I can see the appeal.”

“Jewelry,” Felix said simply.

She sighed, removing all her jewelry along with the hair pins and handing it over.

“So what’s for dinner?” she asked.

“Dinner wasn’t part of the deal,” he said.

“Come on, I can smell it from the campfire,” she protested. “You can spare a bowl before you send me off to be eaten by bears.”

Felix stared her down, but she just stared back. Stay strong, hold your ground. Hold it, hold it, hold it. She just kept staring back. Damnit.

“Fine,” Felix sighed. “Just tonight. That’s it. Tomorrow you’re on your own. Got it?”

She just smiled, which wasn’t reassuring. Everyone shifted uncomfortably when she sat down with them by the fire, right by Jack. The twelve year old just turned bright red. Someone had clearly explained to him what happened on a wedding night. This night was going to be even stranger.