You're Too Young to Worry

“Now are you sure he’s okay with you because if you can’t mind him that’s fine.”

“Please child, I had Jason, Matthew and yourself to look after in your teenage years. Now I know the child will be fine. He isn’t an addict or alcoholic.” She smiled, it was her way of saying she was messing because my mood swings where fairly dangerous with everyone expect Luke. “Be careful there today. You are staying for dinner and you can go back home this evening okay?”

“Yes,” I smiled and she kissed my cheek. “I’ll be the angel I was back in my youth.” She tapped my head and frowned. “That would probably kill us. Wouldn’t it babe?” I asked my baby and it gave me a right kick in the bladder. “Ah shit, that hurt!” I hissed.

“Oh trust me you won’t know pain until you have a child like Jason. That child would sleep during the day and stay awake all night. For the last two months I thought I was going to go mad but your mother, bless her, she would stay up at night and talk to me.” She went off into her little trance of when she had her little ‘angel’. She glanced at her watch. “You may get going or you’ll be late. I’ll see you around six for dinner.”

“Alright bye.” I called out and beganwalking waddling over to Jason’s car. Today I was going for a six and a half month appointment. The guys have been gone exactly one month and two weeks. I haven’t talked to Johnny in a month and a half. I’ve had Luke a month and a half. It’s been a month since I realized I was too fat to get into my Hilux, so I’d to use Jason’s shitty ass Peugeot 206. A lot of things can happen in a short amount of time. And hell it did.

Twenty minutes later I arrived in the doctors office. I gave Mandy my appointment card and sat down to read the same magazine I’ve been reading the last three times I was here. A heavily pregnant lady sat down opposite me and I just stared at her, I mean to say she was huge was an understatement.

“When are you due?” she asked nicely. Pregnant and nice, wonder what her secret is? Probably a loving supportive husband who doesn’t cheat.

“In two and a half months, you?”

“Another month and my twins will pop out.” My eyes nearly popped out! Twins and she’s huge? Holy shit I do not want to be that fat when I reach full term. “My husband and I,” yes there’s the loving supportive husband. “Where so surprised when we found out I was excepting twins. How did the father of your child feel?”

I bit the inside of my lip and tried not to burst into tears. “H-he was killed before he knew.” Somehow knowing Nick was dead made me feel a little better. She gasped throwing her hand over her mouth. I tried to hide a smile. After all those years of lying about doing drugs these lies are just flowing.

She was going to say something when Mandy called me. I jumped up as fast as I could and walked into Steve. He greeted me before telling me to get up on the table. Within five attempts I got up no problem.

“So how is my oh so favorite patient today?” he asked rubbing the freezing cold jell onto my stomach.

“Great, except I’m fat, that bitch out front that’s having her twins next month with her husband and then she has the nerve to ask me about my baby’s father. I told her he was dead. I felt like kicking her ass pregnant lady style.” I ranted and laughed lightly. Guess he heard shit like this everyday.

“That would be Kelly, complete snob,” he laughed running the instrument over my lower abdominal. “Health freak as well. We have the little babe facing us today.” He turned the screen to be and I could see my little angel moving around. “Wasn’t the dad at the hospital? The guy with the blond hair with brown in it?”

“Oh yeah,” I said completely forgetting that I told the doctor that. “No he’s not the dad just a really good friend that I wanted to stay with me because I was scared shitless.” I told him keeping my eyes on the screen and listening to the heartbeat. “Is the baby okay with everything?”

“Yeah everything seems fine. Head is the right size and it seems to be the right length. Do you want to know the sex of the baby?” he asked and I shook my head. “Fair play, most women want to know on the first scan and I tell them ‘I’m a gyno not a miracle performer.’” He laughed and I smiled back. He whipped the jell off me. “I just need to take your weight and how plump you are.”

“Well at least you didn’t call me fat that’s the main thing.” I laughed and let him get on with his measurements. After he did his thing I started talking to him about giving birth. He told me straight out that I should have a c-section because there is huge chance that I could lose a lot of blood which could led to me dying.

I needed to think get everything from the baby to Johnny sorted in my head so I went to the one place in Huntington that I knew I could get piece and quiet without being interrupted. I got into the car and drove off to my thinking place and knew I would be a long time there so I left my phone switched off.

I walked down the old concert path way and to the bench I used to sit on every day when I was eight up until I was fifteen. By then I was to busy getting stoned or drunk to even stop and think about life for a while and when I did this is where I came. It was so peaceful and no one walking around would ever disturb you.

I smiled running my fingers over the name I carved into the bench nearly twenty years ago. It had been painted over the years but I still kept coming back to go over it. I wanted the world to see that name. Because it was someone I was proud of. Someone I loved the most in life.

I got thinking of the guys and how much meeting them has changed my life. Jason, my big brother and best friend, tried his hardest to keep me away from drugs while he was doing them. His dealer was Jimmy who turned into one of our best friends and supplier.

Jimmy the guy everyone loved. The only time you knew something was wrong with him was when you mentioned family. He had a rough childhood, he never even meet his father, but then again he isn’t willing to ask the only person who knows who his father is. Threw Jimmy we got to know Brian and Matt Seward, Johnny’s older brother. Come to think of it I wouldn’t know anyone of my friends if I hadn’t have done drugs.

Except Val, I knew her from Kindergarten because her brother bullied me and I didn’t have the heart to tell Jason or my parents. But Val found my crying one-day in the toilets and she managed to get it out of me, and hurt her brother. Thus leading to meeting Michelle but we all lost contact when we left for middle school.

After some thoughts of how to deal with my feelings Johnny and the kid when it’s older, I decided I had spent long enough at the bench thinking about my life and how one person can change everything for you.

My stomach growled slightly and the baby gave a huge kick to remind me it was time to eat. I rubbed my stomach as it kicked again. “Alright can’t you wait ten minutes? Your so impatient.” I told my child and walked towards the car park. I got another kick in the bladder to let me know it was still there or it was punishing me.

I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath before recovering from the last blow to my bladder. All of a sudden I became light headed, so I slowed my pace down and took deep breaths. Maybe I should have eaten sooner.

My eyes lids became heavy and I fought against them trying to get to the car. I was still breathing deep and was forcing my eyes to stay open but I couldn’t. All I could see was blackness, even with my eyes open.

No One’s POV.

“I’ll be back in a second sweetheart,” Linda called to her grandson as the house phone rang. “Hello,” she answered in warmly. “This is she,” she frowned wondering why a hospital would be calling her. “W-what?” she whispered. “Yes, thank you.” She hung up the phone and back into Luke. “C’mon pet we need to go to the hospital.” She said softly trying to make things seem all right.

But they weren’t.

Leana grabbed the Berry brothers, as tears streamed down her face. “You need to get home now.” She told them as she ushered them into the car. She explained the message on her cell from Michelle. The didn’t say a word they sped down the night sky heading to the nearest airport, leaving Leana crying softly as she watched the boys play ‘Seize The Day’. She tried to put on a brave face when Jimmy looked over, to let him nothing was wrong.

But there was something terribly wrong.

At the end of their set, Leana broke down in front of her fiancé and his friends. Explaining why Jason and Matt couldn’t be found by anyone. By the time her recalled events were told Johnny was nowhere to be found.