Status: Due to no more insperation for writing this story, I have discontinued posting.
You're Too Young to Worry
Hurt
Beep. Beep. Beep.
I frowned hearing that god-awful noise over and over again. It was so annoying. And those things up my nose, hell where do I start? I opened my eyes slowly, white lights shining down on them. I closed them only to open them and see I was in a white room. The hospital.
“You’re awake!” someone said a bit louder than I would have liked. I was going to tell them to shut up but my throat was like sandpaper. That someone turned out to be Matt. And he looked like complete shit. “Hang on I’ll get you someone.” He ran outside I could hear him yelling.
A nurse ran in with a cup of ice. I tried to sit up for her but I was so weak and my stomach began to ache. “Take this pet.” She told me, as Matt sat me up. She brought the cup to my lips and I swallowed it was a relief.
The nurse took the thing out of my nose. “What happened?” I croaked looking at the nurse and then back to Matt. Val walked into the room with a teary smile with Shads right behind her.
“You fainted due to stress and high blood pressure,” Matt told me. “You’ve been in a coma for the past six days.” I frowned. “You hit your head off the pillar of a pavement.” I gave a weak smile to let him know I understood. I don’t remember a thing. Although I do remember going to Steve.
“The baby?” I asked trying to bring my hand and my eyes to my stomach. I began breathing heavily and my heart rate increase. If anything happened to my child because I fell I don’t know what I’d do.
“Your daughter is in NICU.” The nurse said exchanging glances with everyone in the room. “She was born at 11.11 pm on Monday by c-section. She’s in an incubator at the moment. She is also on a ventilator and a feeding tube. Do you have a name for her yet?” Tears came down my eyes.
“I have a baby girl.” I said but it only came out as a whisper. I bit my bottom lip a tried to hold back some of the tears, but I wasn’t working. “Can I see her?”
“I’m afraid you can’t go anywhere until the doctor talks to you.” She said trying to smile. “If you give me five minutes I could get a picture of her for you?” she set down the cup. I nodded, smiling slightly. “I’ll be a back in a few minutes.”
“Oh hon,” Val walked over and hugged me tight as I cried into her shoulder. “She’ll be fine. If she’s related to you at all she will be fine.” She whispered and I let out a little laugh. “She’s so small.” She told me almost so I couldn’t hear. I sobbed in fear, how the hell could I have been so stupid? She might not live she’s born over twenty weeks to early. “It’s okay babe, JB and his parents are with her now. They’ll look after her.”
“Ms. Berry?” the nurse came back in. Val let me go but still stood beside the bed. “Here is photo.” Val took the camera off her and showed it to me. I saw a tiny little baby hooked up to several machines. “She weighs one pound four ounces and it twelve inches long.” I was breathing heavy again; I couldn’t believe that small little thing was my baby. My baby girl.
She was nothing, just a tiny amount of bones. She looked so fragile and harmless, yet she was causing a horrible pain in me. She was so small I couldn’t get over it. And I missed her being brought into this world. It was heart breaking to see her like that.
“Ms. Berry glad to see your awake.” A young female doctor walked in. “I just want to check everything before I can let you see the baby, alright?” I nodded and Val gave the camera back to the nurse. “I just want to see how your scar is healing from the casern section and then your stitches.” She got everyone to leave as she began to check everything. “Everything seems to be fine. I’ll get a couple of nurses to bring you down to NICU but I can’t have to staying for two long. Any questions?”
“Yeah,” I tried to say. “Where was I found? I mean where did I fall?”
She frowned. “You don’t remember?” I shook my head. “Well that’s not uncommon when people get head injuries. A passer by found you lying on the side of the road in Talbert Avenue.” She told me. “But you do remember everything from before you fell don’t you?” I nodded. “Good I’ll send your family in now and the nurses will bring you down soon.”
Jason walked in looking the worst I’ve seen him. “Bitch don’t ever do that again.” He told me and I looked him straight in the eye before more tears sprung to my eyes. We hugged and for the first time in years I cried more then I wanted to. “You scared me so bad. She’s so fucking small, Cat.”
“What happened Jay? I don’t remember?” I whimpered, still holding onto him.
“You fell about five foot away from your mom’s grave.” He explained and I caught my breath. “You where bleeding when they brought you in. mom was staying strong for Luke but she broke when dad came.” He said softly as he rocked us back and foreword. “The baby went into heart failure twice before they got her stable. I was so worried you’d never wake up and see her.”
As if on queue the nurses walked in to take me to my little baby. They took me out of the bed and placed my in the wheel chair. Jay walked one side and Val the other as I made my way up to NICU. I was scared, hurt and happy all at one. I was scared that I hurt my baby, I was hurt because it’s my fault if I lose her and happy because she is finally here.
The door was opened and I was wheeled over to the large incubator. I saw my baby, so small and un-human looking, lying still with wires going in and out of her. “Oh god,” I whispered as a fresh set of tears rolled down my face.
What had I done to her?
I frowned hearing that god-awful noise over and over again. It was so annoying. And those things up my nose, hell where do I start? I opened my eyes slowly, white lights shining down on them. I closed them only to open them and see I was in a white room. The hospital.
“You’re awake!” someone said a bit louder than I would have liked. I was going to tell them to shut up but my throat was like sandpaper. That someone turned out to be Matt. And he looked like complete shit. “Hang on I’ll get you someone.” He ran outside I could hear him yelling.
A nurse ran in with a cup of ice. I tried to sit up for her but I was so weak and my stomach began to ache. “Take this pet.” She told me, as Matt sat me up. She brought the cup to my lips and I swallowed it was a relief.
The nurse took the thing out of my nose. “What happened?” I croaked looking at the nurse and then back to Matt. Val walked into the room with a teary smile with Shads right behind her.
“You fainted due to stress and high blood pressure,” Matt told me. “You’ve been in a coma for the past six days.” I frowned. “You hit your head off the pillar of a pavement.” I gave a weak smile to let him know I understood. I don’t remember a thing. Although I do remember going to Steve.
“The baby?” I asked trying to bring my hand and my eyes to my stomach. I began breathing heavily and my heart rate increase. If anything happened to my child because I fell I don’t know what I’d do.
“Your daughter is in NICU.” The nurse said exchanging glances with everyone in the room. “She was born at 11.11 pm on Monday by c-section. She’s in an incubator at the moment. She is also on a ventilator and a feeding tube. Do you have a name for her yet?” Tears came down my eyes.
“I have a baby girl.” I said but it only came out as a whisper. I bit my bottom lip a tried to hold back some of the tears, but I wasn’t working. “Can I see her?”
“I’m afraid you can’t go anywhere until the doctor talks to you.” She said trying to smile. “If you give me five minutes I could get a picture of her for you?” she set down the cup. I nodded, smiling slightly. “I’ll be a back in a few minutes.”
“Oh hon,” Val walked over and hugged me tight as I cried into her shoulder. “She’ll be fine. If she’s related to you at all she will be fine.” She whispered and I let out a little laugh. “She’s so small.” She told me almost so I couldn’t hear. I sobbed in fear, how the hell could I have been so stupid? She might not live she’s born over twenty weeks to early. “It’s okay babe, JB and his parents are with her now. They’ll look after her.”
“Ms. Berry?” the nurse came back in. Val let me go but still stood beside the bed. “Here is photo.” Val took the camera off her and showed it to me. I saw a tiny little baby hooked up to several machines. “She weighs one pound four ounces and it twelve inches long.” I was breathing heavy again; I couldn’t believe that small little thing was my baby. My baby girl.
She was nothing, just a tiny amount of bones. She looked so fragile and harmless, yet she was causing a horrible pain in me. She was so small I couldn’t get over it. And I missed her being brought into this world. It was heart breaking to see her like that.
“Ms. Berry glad to see your awake.” A young female doctor walked in. “I just want to check everything before I can let you see the baby, alright?” I nodded and Val gave the camera back to the nurse. “I just want to see how your scar is healing from the casern section and then your stitches.” She got everyone to leave as she began to check everything. “Everything seems to be fine. I’ll get a couple of nurses to bring you down to NICU but I can’t have to staying for two long. Any questions?”
“Yeah,” I tried to say. “Where was I found? I mean where did I fall?”
She frowned. “You don’t remember?” I shook my head. “Well that’s not uncommon when people get head injuries. A passer by found you lying on the side of the road in Talbert Avenue.” She told me. “But you do remember everything from before you fell don’t you?” I nodded. “Good I’ll send your family in now and the nurses will bring you down soon.”
Jason walked in looking the worst I’ve seen him. “Bitch don’t ever do that again.” He told me and I looked him straight in the eye before more tears sprung to my eyes. We hugged and for the first time in years I cried more then I wanted to. “You scared me so bad. She’s so fucking small, Cat.”
“What happened Jay? I don’t remember?” I whimpered, still holding onto him.
“You fell about five foot away from your mom’s grave.” He explained and I caught my breath. “You where bleeding when they brought you in. mom was staying strong for Luke but she broke when dad came.” He said softly as he rocked us back and foreword. “The baby went into heart failure twice before they got her stable. I was so worried you’d never wake up and see her.”
As if on queue the nurses walked in to take me to my little baby. They took me out of the bed and placed my in the wheel chair. Jay walked one side and Val the other as I made my way up to NICU. I was scared, hurt and happy all at one. I was scared that I hurt my baby, I was hurt because it’s my fault if I lose her and happy because she is finally here.
The door was opened and I was wheeled over to the large incubator. I saw my baby, so small and un-human looking, lying still with wires going in and out of her. “Oh god,” I whispered as a fresh set of tears rolled down my face.
What had I done to her?