Can’t Look Away

“Are you sure that you don’t want a deeper colour?”

Sasha, who had been cooing to Arlo, smiled amusedly at the question before she shook her head, glancing at her mother who sat on the other side of the kitchen island, studying the fabric swatch she had put in front of her. She had started to do it a lot. With the invitations for her and Lionel’s wedding have been sent, the date was set in stone, and it meant that plans had to be made, plans that Sasha often consulted her mother, Cassie and Ellie about before she took the suggestion back to Lionel. He took an interest in everything. Even when Sasha approached him at a bad time, he still made an effort to take in her opinions, and offer his in return, and Sasha had to admit that she was enjoying planning. She hadn’t thought that she would.

“I knew you wouldn’t like it” Sasha quipped.

“I didn’t say I didn’t like it” Carina protested “It’s nice. I was just asking” she added.

Sasha offered her a dubious look, a smile playing on her lips, before Carina shook her head, pushing the fabric square towards Cassie who stood next to her. “What do you think?” the older woman prodded.

Cassie studied the fabric for a moment before she shrugged. “I like it” she said “I mean, purple is a pretty common wedding colour, but this is soft, almost grey. What are you matching it with?” she prodded.

“A soft sage green” Sasha replied “Maybe some white, too, or really subtle greys” she added.

Cassie nodded her head slowly, something which made the smile on Sasha’s face widen slightly. She still couldn’t quite get over how excited Cassie was to help with the planning of the wedding. “Do you think you’d be OK wearing a dress this colour?” she asked, tapping the piece of fabric.

“Depends on the dress” Cassie retorted “Are you one of those brides that’s going to punish your pretty bridesmaids with horrid dresses so we don’t upstage you?” she added impishly.

Sasha shrugged, her expression impish. “I haven’t decided yet” she quipped.

“Sasha” Carina warned.

“I’m teasing, mama” Sasha retorted, rolling her eyes when she spotted Cassie’s smirk out of the corner of her eye.

Carina nodded before Arlo let out a grumble, causing his grandmother to sweep towards Sasha, happily plucking him out of her arms.. “We will need to get you to a boutique sooner rather than later” she mused “The bridesmaid dresses are important, but I think the moment I am looking forwards to most is seeing my little girl in a wedding dress for the first time” she added, shooting a fond smile towards Sasha who smiled back at her, the tops of her cheeks a light shade of pink.

Cassie tried, and failed, to stifle her laugh, causing Sasha to glare over at her.

Carina didn’t seemed to notice Cassie’s laugh, too busy fussing over Arlo. “The dress shop your sister used was nice” she mused “I could ask if she still has the number so that we could make an appointment” she added.

Sasha’s expression changed, the playfulness sliding out of it, before she shook her head. It had been a couple of weeks since she and Lionel had run into Olivier, and still there was no sign of Leila making an attempt to put things right between them, something which meant her wedding invitation still sat in Lionel’s study, unsent. It wasn’t something Sasha wanted. As weird as things were between her and Leila, she still wanted her sister in the building when she got married to the man she loved, but she unless something changed, she wouldn’t take the risk. The last thing she wanted was for things between Leila and Lionel to spoil the day.

“It’s OK, mama” Sasha said.

“Are you sure?” Carina asked “Leila’s dress was beautiful” she added.

“It was” Sasha agreed “But I have actually found a place” she added. It was true, but it was also a means of stopping Carina from calling Leila. Sasha didn’t know if it would matter to her, but she worried that hearing that her wedding plans were being made without Leila’s input would hurt her sister, and she didn’t want to do that, no matter how bad things were.

“It’s the same place my sister-in-law got her dress from” Cassie piped up “The designer is amazing, and she happens to be my sister-in-law’s cousin, so I was able to pull some strings” she added.

“It’s next Tuesday” Sasha mused “You’re free, aren’t you?” she prodded.

Carina nodded. “I can move some things around” she replied “There’s no way I am missing helping my baby pick out her wedding dress” she added.

Sasha rolled her eyes, but couldn’t hide the blush which had spread across her cheeks.

Cassie grinned, but before she could get her teasing comment out, her phone rang. Huffing out a playful sigh, she scanned the screen before she pushed away from the counter. “I need to take this” she said.

“Aiden?” Sasha quipped, her eyebrows lifted amusedly..

“Yes” Cassie replied “Don’t look at me like that. You’re far worse when it’s Leo” she added.

“I didn’t say a word” Sasha retorted innocently.

Cassie glared at her before she walked out of the room, leaving Sasha giggling behind her.

Carina, who’d been watching the two of them in between fussing over Arlo, let the room fall quiet for a beat before she lightly cleared her throat. “Have you heard anything from your sister?” she asked.

Sasha sighed. “Mama...”

“It was just a question, Sasha” Carina interrupted “Can you just answer it?” she added.

“No, I haven’t” Sasha answered “I thought I might. Leo and I ran into Olivier a couple of weeks ago, but there’s been nothing” she added.

“The invitation?” Carina asked.

“I haven’t sent it yet, mama” Sasha said “I want to, but...It’s complicated. I want you all there, Leila and Olivier included, but right now, I can’t trust that inviting her wouldn’t be a mistake. I want it to be wonderful” she added.

Carina moved back towards her, using one hand to gently smooth out Sasha’s hair. “I know you do” she said.

Sasha leant into her hand, closing her eyes. “Are you upset that I haven’t sent the invitation?” she asked.

Carina shook her head before she pressed a kiss to the top of Sasha’s head. “It’s your day” she mused softly “And you’re entitled to do whatever you have to do to make it as wonderful as it ought to be. I just wish things between you and your sister were better. I know it’s not your fault, I just wish that things were better” she added.

Sasha let out a soft sigh. “So do I, mama” she replied.