Corruption

The next morning, breakfast was at Candace's, which I was glad for. Going to Aiden's just wasn't an option for me right now. I didn't need to have him in my face all the time, gloating about this and that. I got enough of that during the middle of the night. But the breakfast wasn't like an everyday breakfast I was use to having here. Yes there was a lot of food, but the light chatter that usually wen ton didn't happen. There was mostly silence, making feel like every noise I made was a disturbance.

I didn't look at Candace as I chewed my pastry the waiters had put onto my plate. I couldn't bring myself to look at anyone for that matter, but their stares were burning into my flesh as I stared at my plate.

As soon as I was done with my breakfast, left quickly without a glance at Candace. I felt awful for ignoring her, but I couldn't deal with it right now. I just wanted to get away. So that is what I did. I grabbed my shoes, slipped them on, and went outside. Without thinking, I started to walk, turning right instead of left in the direction of Aiden's house.

My mind was clear as I walked, nothing coming to mind until the trees were suddenly thinning and then there were none. To my left was a small park, two swings in the back, and a metal slide just in front of me. I sighed, feeling at peace at once. It felt so familiar, so…like home. I almost ran to the swing on the right and sat down, swinging as I kept my eyes closed. I would have to show Candace this place. She would love it just as much as she loved the one back home.

The park in Georgia use to be our place, our fortress of solitude if you will. When Candace left, I had went there almost everyday, trying to think of how I could apologize to her and yet, be sincere about it. I had been sorry I had yelled at her like that, but I didn't regret doing it. I had told Candace what I thought of her, well, more like threw it onto the ground, but she got what I was getting at.

I swung on the swing until my legs were ramp from moving them back and fourth for so long. Deciding I should head back for lunch, I jumped off the swing and strode down the road. Charles past with the limo, waving to me as he passed. It was too late for him to bringing Nathan to work, and Julie never went anywhere beside going up and down the stairs, so he must have been driving Candace somewhere.

Not really wanting to think about what Candace was doing, I thought about Charles. Did anyone even know anything about him? Where did he sleep? His car? No, that couldn't be right. Maybe he slept inside the house like the rest of the staff. I had just never seen him before. I laughed at myself. I was so dumb thinking about Charles' sleeping arrangements.

"You need a hobby." I told myself out loud. I was half expecting Aiden to pop out of the woods and tell me off about what I had just said, but he didn't; I didn't see him all day actually. When I toured the garden behind Candace's house, he didn't show up in a tree; when I walked past his house and down the endless road, he didn't follow me. It was a nice peaceful day by myself, even though I wanted to be with Candace.

I missed Candace's face next me every time I looked. I missed the way her eyes lit up when she thought of a good idea or the way her lips curled up and down at the same time when she tried to surpress a grin.

Nathan came into my room as I was reading a book that had been placed on my bed for me to read. It had no title and was more boring than watching paint dry, but I skimmed over the pages, every now and then stopping to read a few parts that got a little heated between the two enemies of the book, but everything else was dull.

"You like that book?" Nathan asked. He placed a plastic bag on my bed that held some type of suit.

I glanced up from the book then smiled. "Not in the slightest."

Nathan chuckled, then patted the plastic bag. "This is for you to wear tonight at the premiere. We'll be leaving soon."

I nodded. The premiere, of course I would forget all about that. I placed the book on the end table by the bed and picked up the bag just as Nathan closed the bedroom door behind him.

I dressed into the suit, looking at myself in the mirror. The black made my red hair look even more flouresant, but I really didn't mind. It was the best thing I had ever worn so I wasn't going to complain. I walked down the stairs after grabbing my wallet from my other pants and slipping it into the inside breast pocket of my jacket. Everyone was already waited at the bottom, all dressed in fashionable clothes.

Candace was the one that caught my eye. Her dress was hanging just above her knees, showing off her legs. The cut was almost too low, but not quite. I averted my eyes down to the stairs so I wouldn't trip and fall flat on my face.

"Shall we?" Julie asked, going through the open door Nathan was holding open. Nathan let Candace go before him, but she waited for me. I nodded at her and followed her to the car, getting in after everyone else. I noticed Julie looking at Candace and I as we drove, but I ignored her. Her stares were so frequent now that I learned to ignore them. A nervous habit of mine, I drummed my fingers on my knee, not able to sit still. Even though I was excited about going to a premiere, I was still a little nervous about it all. Candace being there was the cause of both of these things. I was nervous about her presence because I really didn't know how she was going to react to me now, but I was also excited because she was finally there next to me every time I turned my head.

Candace seemed to get irritated as she watched her mother stare at us both. It was like she had noticed for the first time that her mother watched her like a hawk. Maybe it was the first time. Candace was the kind of person to see only what she wanted to see.

The premiere was larger than I thought it would have been. It was in another town, about an hour away from Candace's home. Since it wasn't in the usual spots for big-shot premieres, I figured that it wouldn't be that crowded. I was wrong. The screams were deafening when the doors popped open, even though the crowds couldn't see who we were just yet.

Nathan seemed to be in his element as he clasped hands with Julie and took her in the flashing lights outside of the limousine. Candace seemed reluctant to go so I gave her a slight nudge, trying to encourage her. She was like a robot as she stepped from the car and stepped out into the screams of people that didn't get tickets on the other side of the street.

Reports were everywhere, shoving microphones and cameras in Candace's face, startling her. She was frozen in spot, her mouth hanging open in anguish. I got out of the limo and grabbed Candace's elbow, shoving my way through the crowd pulling along a stunned Candace. Once inside the enormous building, I pulled her to the left, following the signs on the walls. The world inside was quieter, but there was still a little chatter from the people trailing in the hallways, trying to get into the ballroom.

A tall man with short black hair let us through the door, closing it quickly behind us. The ballroom was magnificent, all of the light coming from a single chandelier that was bolted to the ceiling. Elegant tables with different reds and golds were assorted around the room. People in suit and gowns were seated in some of the chairs, others left open for the guests that have not yet arrived.

Candace didn't seem to take it all in like I was doing. She seemed sidetracked almost bored now, but I could tell that her fingers on my arm were tight, almost constricting.

Nathan and Julie waved from the largest table in the front of the room by the performing stage. I led Candace through the tables and waiters to the table, pulling out her chair for her. She sat down without a word, grabbing the napkin in front of her instantly and draping it over her lap.

A large poster behind the table showed a picture of a teenager girl staring at an older figure, her dad maybe? I wasn't sure. The two actors looked new, but also familiar. It clicked rather easily into place in mind where I had seen them. They looked exactly like Candace and Nathan. Even the slight smirk on the actress' face was something Candace did often. The words The Other Side of Me was scrawled across the top of the massive poster.

Nathan said my name and my head snapped instinctively toward his direction. He was shaking hands with the man that was on the poster, introducing the guests he had brought with him to the premiere.

Candace didn't seem to notice that standing next to each other, they could be twins. I watched her then, trying to see what was wrong with her. She grabbed her fork in her strong grasp, starting to gentle stab her spoon that was still on the table. I don't she noticed she was doing it though. It was like she was in a different world, or too deep into her thoughts to realize where we were and what we were doing there.

Dinner was served, but Candace hardly touched her food. I was too distracted that she wasn't eating so I really didn't eat either, even though I was really hungry. I excused myself to the bathroom so I could go and wash my hands, but someone had followed me. Right before I went inside, I whirled around to see who it was.

"Did I startle to you?" Julie asked.

I sighed. "No."

For a long moment we stared at each other. She was really getting to be annoying, but I would never tell her that to her face, so I waited for her to tell me what she wanted to. It didn't take long.

"Um…Mike?" she said, not waiting for me to answer. "I was just wondering if you have talked to Candace about last night. I'm sure she is sorry she yelled at you."

I shook my head. "She didn't yell at me."

"Well I'm sure she is sorry for whatever she did to you."

It was weird thinking that Julie was blaming everything that had happened on her own daughter instead of the boy her loved her. "She isn't the one that needs to be sorry. I am."

"Aren't you?"

I thought about that. "In some ways…yes. But others, not really." I wasn't going to elaborate on that if I wanted to keep the life Candace was really living a secret from her family.

"Have you told her that?"

"No."

"You should you know. Everything will be okay after that. I read my daughter well. Then she was gone, walking away with a slight waddle in her stride. If I could have guessed, I would have said she was…

"Sorry son." A middle aged man said, bumping into my side as he came out of the restroom. I nodded to acknowledge him, then went inside myself. Splashing cold water on my face, I stood by the sink and thought. Julie just had to make everything hard for me, didn't she? Why couldn't she just leave me alone and let me do everything for myself. I am a big boy. And she isn't my mother.

I dried my face and went back to the table. People were already getting up and following other signs that led the way to a large theater. Nathan, Julie, and Candace were all waiting for me by the table. “Come along.” Nathan said proudly as I approached.

We all followed the crowd, every once and awhile being stopped to shake hands with someone I didn’t know, or to say I hi to someone I had only seen in movie. But we eventually made it to the theater and were seated in the front row between the stars of the film and the main crew.

I should have felt special as I sat here in this amazing seat, of course I didn’t. It felt odd as I tried to enjoy myself, only to look next to me and see Candace’s pained face. She had never acknowledged me, never even spoken to me since the night before. It had never gone on this long before, and it was starting to worry me.

Candace and I made up very easily, forgetting about the fights we have and never talking about them again. The topic of a few months ago was just not something we could talk about anymore.

As the lights dimmed above our heads and lights cheers came from the crowd, I made a promise to myself. I would never bring it up again, no matter how much I wanted to know. The beginning of the movie shocked me, screaming and yelling coming out of the speakers surrounding me.

Of course Candace didn’t even flinch. Her face was screwed up in mock concentration, trying to decipher her own thoughts. Only two minutes later, she changed. The young actress that could have been Candace came on the screen, the older male actor coming on as well. They were both yelling at each other in their living room of their two story house.

So familiar…

The couches, the window, the curtains, even the car keys on the table behind them. All familiar. That was when I stopped watching the movie and watched Candace. Her attention was drawn now, intent on the plot of the story. I listened to the dialogue, and wanted to take Candace out of there right now and bring her back home. Of course I never heard the whole story about Candace’s dad leaving. She had never shared that part of her life with me.

But I did remember that day he left. Candace sat on the roof of her house all night long, staring at the empty space in the driveway; listening to her mother’s sobs from the other room. What else were you supposed to do when your father left? I had done almost the same thing…I guess. I had a bon fire and burned a lot of my things that reminded me of my dad.

Sure I regret it now but boy had it felt good then. Watching the flames lick all of the possessions he had left behind, erasing him from the house for good.

Tears began to run down Candace’s face as the movie progressed farther into the dark past that was father and daughter. Maybe if the actors and actresses didn’t look so much like the people in Candace’s life, it wouldn’t have been so hard for her. But they did look the same, making her focus stay onto the screen.

I slid my hand under hers, entwining our fingers together. Candace gripped back, hard than I thought she would have. She looked at me then, her eyes still glossy with tears. Her eyes begged me to help her, but all I could do was squeeze her hand tighter, turning to the screen so I could see what was happening.

The father, in the movie called Robert, was back standing in the door way holding the three suit cases he had left with. The teen daughter, Caroline wasn’t happy to see him home. She didn’t go near him, didn’t talk to him for most of the movie as Robert tried to break through Caroline’s wall. I didn’t need to watch the rest; sure I knew how it ended anyway.

The ending credits started and the lights flickered, people standing up on their feet and praising the cast, the crew, and the whole picture in general. Candace did not move and nor did I. I really couldn’t if I had wanted to. Candace’s grip on my hand was so tight I could no longer feel my now purple fingers. Her grip loosened after a long moment, then she was gone, up out of her seat and almost running away from me.

I got up and ran after her through the long halls and down a flight of stairs until there was a row of benches in from of us. Candace sat down on one, her hands covering her face as she sobbed silently, her shoulders bobbing up and down. I reached with caution out to her, sitting down next her.

Once I did, she tackled me violently, wrapping her arms around my chest and burying her face into my chest so violently I almost fell off of the bench. Her smell filled my nostrils with their vanilla scent. “Shh…” I tried to soothe her, rubbing my hand o her bare back. “It was just a movie.” That was something stupid to say because it was almost like Candace’s life had been on screen, but she didn’t argue with me, only buried her face farther into my jacket.

It looked funny but I couldn’t find the sense to laugh. She wasn’t trying to be so helpless. She calmed down after a long moment, checking her face in the ladies restroom across the hall. When she came out, she looked like she had a cold. Her nose was red, and her eyes were a little puffy, but she would fit in with all the other sniffling blubber faces upstairs.

Nathan and Julie didn’t come over to us and we went back upstairs, but stayed near the group of people they were visiting with. No one was leaving the ball room, so the after party must be here at the same place. The tables had changed no longer elegant red and golds, but bright blues and greens; more exciting colors. The large table Candace and I had been seated at was now filled with a variety of food, a buffet.

“Do you want something to eat?” I asked Candace. She looked up and me and shook her head. “Some water then?” She nodded this time, going over and getting a glass on her own. I followed anyway, not wanting to get lost in the crowd that was going larger as the seconds passed.

I don’t know how long the party was, more than three hours is all I know. By the time it was time to go, Candace was leaning her head on m y shoulder, no longer caring if she looked elegant or not. There were toasted every half an hour, people laughing about something or another every few seconds, and a few children that had been dragged along asleep on the chairs at the extra tables.

The limo began to arrive at the front door, ready to pick up the occupants. The crowd slowly dwindled until there were only thirty or forty people left, all still surrounding Nathan and Julie.

“Why don’t we go over to my place and spend some time over there? We’ll let the help clean this place up.” Nathan said, holding up his wine glass that had been filled three times already. The group murmured in appraise, then headed for the doors.

Julie stayed put and motioned for Candace and I to come over to her. Candace perked straightened up, now fully awake. “Nathan and I are going to go in someone’s else’s vehicle. You guys go home with Charles and we will see you there.” She patted Candace’s cheek and then left with her husband and her new friends.

Candace groaned.

“What?”

She shrugged, then headed out the door like the rest of the crowd, but turned left on the street instead of right. There were no more reporters, no more new crews there to bother us now. Charles was the only one of the sidewalk, on the whole block it looked like. His hand were covered with black leather gloves to cover them in the nippy summer air.

Candace got in without a word.

“How was it Candace?” Charles asked, peeking into the limousine. I did not hear her answer, but Charles smiled even brighter. “Sounds marvelous.”

I smiled at Charles an got in like Candace had, without a word. Candace was on the long seat on the side of the limo stretched out like she was going to take a nap, but she was far from it. Her eyes were wide open, her mouth moving silently as she thoughts something over.

I stayed quiet and out of her way on the way home, turning on the TV to watch the news. Nothing was on beside clips from the “red carpet premiere.” I turned it off immediately after seeing myself pushing threw all of the reporters, Candace trailing behind with a frightened look on her sallow face.

It seemed the way home took longer than it had taken to arrive at the premiere, and that was saying something. I got out of the car, reached my hand inside the car, and helped Candace stepped out and onto the gravel driveway. The front door was wide open, people standing just inside.

“Let’s just go upstairs.” I whispered to her, yanking her elbow and tugging her through the throng of people drinking and laughing, Nathan in on all of the fun. At the top of the stairs, a soft yelp cold be heard from Candace’s room. She ran to her door and let Cassandra out of the room, scooping her into her arms and continuing on down the hallway.

It was a slight surprise that we were headed to my room, but I didn’t protest. Candace plopped herself down on the sofa and sighed, placing Cassandra on her chest. I sat down by her feet, staring blankly at the TV screen. Candace did not move, only her hand twitched as she patted Cassandra’s head every now and then. The silence was awkward and I wanted to fill it with something, but thought against all of my lame ideas. I sighed and left her on the couch, going over to the bed and relaxing, taking off the jacket before laying my head on the pillow. This was going to be a really long night.

An hour passed without any noise, then Candace spoke quietly. It wasn’t for me to hear though, it was to Cassandra. “Cassandra is such a long name,” she pondered, changing positions on the couch, her head now on the other side so I could see it. “Why don’t I call you Cass. Cass sounds good.”

That was it. Silence enveloped the room again, making me want to close my eyes and fall asleep, but I knew I couldn’t possibly do that even if I tried. I wanted to her Candace speak…to me.

Two hours passed. Nothing from Candace. The guests downstairs was getting a little louder than they had, now full of liquor. I contemplated on going down and joining them ,but knew I would have more fun sitting on my bed and drooling. They would never give me liquor, and they wouldn’t be as laid back as they are right now if a new comer came into the group. Besides, Candace would need me. I didn’t know why, but I knew she would want to talk about it…or at least acknowledge what had happened tonight.

The puppy now called Cass I guess groaned as the clock above the bedroom door just passed three hours. Candace sighed in agreement, her soft voice carrying over to me as she said, “Happy birthday, Mike.”

I smiled, but she couldn’t see me. “Thanks. Happy birthday to you too.” I went and sdat down on the couch again, ready to be on speaking terms again. Cass felt me come over and hopped up from her spot on Candace’s chest, pouncing off of her and bounding to me. I scratched behind her ears. “You want to talk about it?” I asked.

“Not really.”

I shrugged like it didn’t matter to me either way. “Okay.”

She turned to me like my answer wasn’t what she had been looking for. “Maybe I do.”

“Okay.” I said again.

She sighed. “I don’t know.”

“Well—I’ll be here when you make up your mind--just as long as it is within the next two days.” I had come up with this as I sat on my bed for the last two hours. Being hjere with Candace was making her miserable, and I. We couldn’t keep doing this forever. And my mom needed me anyways. At least, that was what I told myself.

Her posture stiffened. “What do you mean?”

“I have to leave soon Candace. My mom needs me.”

She looked at her dog still in my lap, her cheeks turning Crimson. “I need you.”

I didn’t answer right away, thinking about it. She may have thought she needed me, but she had gotten along fine without me here before. She had fallen in love, got her relationship with her dad back up. She was better off with me out of the way. “Sorry.” I said sincerely.

Candace sat up a little straighter, cocking her head to the side. “I need to tell you something—something important.”

I shifted where I sat, nervous about her tone of voice. “What?”

Someone knocked on the door and opened it a little. “Can I come in?” a voice said.

“Yeah.” I called in the direction of the door, regretting it immediately as soon as I saw Julie in the door way, rubbing small circles into her belly.

“How has your night been going?” she asked, coming over to stand behind the couch.

Cass jumped off Mike’s lap and onto mine to get to Julie. She yipped her little announcement she always did, making Julie smile. “Hi, Cassandra.” She mumbled, giving Cass a good pat on the head. She smiled at Cass, Candace and I. “It is pretty late, you two. You should be in bed.”

I figured it was aimed toward Candace, and she obeyed, getting up from the couch, grabbing Cass as she stood. She smiled and left the room, looking back at me as she went.

“Have you told her yet?” Julie whispered into my ear.

I groaned. Not this again. “No.”

Her lips turned down into a frown. “Why not?”

I looked at Candace that had stopped right in front of the door. “Because,” I wasn’t going to just go and say this to her. She would beat herself up inside for it.

“Chicken.” She said.

“Am I missing something?” Candace asked. I looked her way, but didn’t answer her. Of course she was missing something, she was missing me. That was my opinion anyway, and apparently Julie’s as well.

“Did you like the movie?” Julie was smiling now, trying to hide the turmoil inside of her.

Candace shuffled her feet, looking at the ground, clearly uncomfortable with this question. “It was good.”

“I know!” Julie shrieked, surprising everyone. “And the main character, the girl. I think her name was Cheri…anyway; she looked exactly like you. It was amazing. Your father agrees with me. She almost acted like you.”

Candace nodded at her mother, but glanced at me. No, she glared at me. It wasn’t in rage, but in desperate assistance. I couldn’t think of what to do. Candace decided to escape herself, taking off out the room without another word.

Julie didn’t seem to notice she had upset her daughter. “What is wrong with you?” she demanded, slapping her hand on the back of the couch.

“Excuse me?” I was the one that had something wrong with them?

“How could you not tell her tonight? It was the perfect setting, perfect mood.”

I shook my head, disbelieving. “It wasn’t even close to perfect.”

“You just need to take my advice and go for it.”

I was exasperated. She was so unbelievable it was sickening. She had to meddle into everything, ruin my time here, and just be plain annoying. If she would just let me do what I wanted to do about it, we all would be better off in the long run. Julie wasn’t like that though. She had to meddle into every little thing of everyone’s life. “Can you just forget about it?”

“No!” she said, her face coming closer to mine. “You need my help in this and—“

I stood erect trying to get away from Julie. “I don’t want your help.”

She didn’t seem to believe me. “Of course you do. You need---“

“You’re not my mother.” I stated calmly. “I know what is best for myself.” She was quiet for a moment, not even breathing. Her mouth opened to say something, but I cut her off. “I should get some sleep. It’s really late and I have a really big day tomorrow.”

She didn’t respond, or answer, just left the room, the door slamming behind her. What I had said was harsh, but it had to be done. She couldn’t keep trying to control my life. She didn’t even do that to her own daughter. I really didn’t get why she was doing it to me. Maybe, just maybe she cared for me the way a mother would, but she wasn’t. That sounded so mean in my mind I pretended I didn’t even think it. She could act like my mother if she wanted to. The good side to that was I didn’t really have to listen to her.

Aiden didn’t come like I thought he would have. Of course I was relieved, but also a little curious. Had he not felt obligated to butt into my life tonight? Or was he somewhere else…with someone else? I realized that I hadn’t heard Candace talk about Aiden when she was around me. Of course when he was actually with us, she payed way more attention to him than she did to me, but when she was with me…it was like she forgot about him all together.

I took out my guitar from under my bed, and went out to the balcony. The moon was almost full. A full moon tomorrow I guessed, staring at the bright planet for a moment, then I began to play, still paying attention to the moon. I really don’t know if what I was playing was even a song, but I wasn’t paying attention. I didn’t care. Playing was my passion; it was my favorite thing to do.

When I was playing I was free…