Sound Effects and Overdramatics

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I had barely fallen asleep, content to just watch Laurel-Beth-sleep soundlessly. Her now hazel eyes flitted behind her eyelids. I could tell by looking at her that she hadn’t been sleeping well. I wondered if that was just from finding out the news or if it was just her new normal.

I wasn’t making much headway in that department either, but I didn’t wanna fall asleep and wake up to an empty bed, thinking it was only a dream or something. So I forced myself to stay awake, just so she could get some peace.

I eased my arm out from under her head and replaced my torso with an extra pillow, taking care not to wake her up, because I doubted her sleeping patterns had changed that much. No one just stops being a light sleeper unless they are seriously sedated, and to my knowledge, she wasn’t.

On the balcony, I slid the door shut behind me and lit a cigarette before answering my phone.

“Yeah?” I asked on my inhale.

“Where the fuck are you, man? Michelle is going ballistic.” Matt ranted.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Don’t-don’t worry about it? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I’m taking care of something that isn’t really you’re fucking business.”

“Are you with that chick? You are, aren’t you? You ditched us so you could chase down some fucking groupie?”

“She isn’t a groupie, asshole.” I snapped. I took a long inhale to calm my shit. “It’s Laurel.”

Silence. I could practically hear his neurons misfiring with the weight of what I had just said. Punching him in the face for what happened wasn’t enough and we both knew it. He didn’t dare bring her up to me after that because he knew I would do it again.

Her leaving was his fault. Her being back didn’t change anything.

If she was back, anyway.

For all I knew, she was only back for the funeral and was headed back to London with Kai in a couple days. Which would explain why she didn’t want to have sex. It didn’t bother me because that wasn’t all she was to me, but we’d never been able to not when we were together, so the change of pace was a little surprising.

Which, again, was probably just her new normal.

She was a whole new person now. One I knew absolutely nothing about, except that she loved me enough to fly all the way back here to make sure I was okay.

“Oh shit.” Matt finally managed. I plopped my ass into a chair and scratched my eyebrow with my thumb, trying to ease the headache that was starting to form. We hadn’t talked about anything since I made the decision to stay, and I had too many questions swirling around in my brain. I was either too sober or not sober enough and we had finished off the remainder of her vodka together.

“What does this mean?”

“I don’t know.”

“What are you gonna tell Michelle?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, when are you gonna be back?”

“I don’t know! Fuck, Matt! Lay off!” I screamed. I lit another cigarette off the cherry from my almost-finished one and flicked the butt over the wall.

“Fine. Go get your dick sucked and chill the fuck out.”

I hung up and tossed the damn thing on the table with a chuckle. As I leaned forward on my knees, I scrubbed my face with my hands.

If he thought not having my dick sucked was the issue then he really had no idea.

A hand slid up my back and rested between my shoulder blades. I straightened and reached for Laurel's hand as she came around from behind me.

Her long, cream-colored legs poked out from my black button-up. She'd demanded it after we settled in for the movie, but hadn't worn anything underneath. So while I shivered in the breeze, I burned with the desire to pop off all the buttons and put my mouth all over every inch of her skin.

She could change her hair and her eyes and her address, even her name, but she was still Laurel. She still smelled the same and tasted the same.

God, she even looked at me the same. Like she was always one step away from letting my frozen corpse sink to the bottom of the ocean…

"Let me guess." She mumbled, pushing her hair back. "Matt."

"Yeah...I kinda just bailed on everyone. We got to Jimmy's parents' and I realized that the one person I needed had walked away from me. Again."

"I didn't think it would have been appropriate for me to stay."

"What's not appropriate," I said with a smirk, "is you looking like that and standing way over there." I yanked her into my lap and cupped her thighs. She put her hands on my face and kissed me.

No preamble, no hesitation. She pushed her mouth against mine, her hair curtaining us, and devoured me. Her teeth grazed my lip and then pulled it. She caught my tongue in her mouth and sucked on it. I moaned and leaned into her, kissing her harder.

She worked me free of my pants and slid herself on top of me. I moaned again, louder, and gripped her legs hard enough to leave bruises. As she rocked against me, she wove her fingers into my hair and pulled before dragging her teeth up the side of my neck.

I hissed when she clamped down on my jugular and started sucking.

Much too soon, that familiar jolt pulsed through my body. My hips bucked and I groaned. She pulled her mouth away from my neck and her squeak shocked my system.

Her forehead rested against mine as her nails broke the skin on the back of my neck. I kissed her again, silencing her moans.

When she came, that was the end of me. I pushed myself against her, bouncing her body up and down when she started to slow. I couldn't take it. I was going to burst.

And then I was going to take her into the bedroom and keep going.

My body went rigid as I came, and she glided herself along, pumping me for more. When at last she slowed, she put a kiss to my shoulder and rested against it, her breath coming in deep, slow shudders.

"Fuck." I breathed before sticking two cigarettes in my mouth and lighting them. She took one with a smile and I kissed her again.

"Um…" she started. I tensed, ready for what she was going to say.

Because when it came down to it, she hadn't changed at all.

She didn’t give me a chance to stop her. She slid off my lap and moved to the wall, getting a firm grip on it. Her hair whipped around as she stared out over the skyline. I remained sitting, stuffing my still-hard dick back into my pants and buttoning up.

I knew that look and I should have known better.

I should have stopped her.

I should have waited to come here.

After some silence, she turned, wiping at her eyes and sniffling. The cigarette burned between her fingers. She took one hit off of it before tossing it to the ground. “You’re engaged, Brian.”

“I know…”

“You can’t just...take that back. She has the ring. She probably has the dress. She has...she has you. And I am such a fucking idiot.”

“So, what? You leave? Go back to London, with...with Kai, and I never hear from you again?”

“It’s-”

“Don’t.” I growled, with another sarcastic chuckle. “Don’t say complicated. It’s insulting.” I whirled out of the chair, shoving it back and storming back into the hotel room.

Now, I was definitely too sober.

“You’re phone’s ringing.” She told me. She held it out to me and Michelle’s name and picture flashed up at me. I took it and threw it, smashing it against the wall next to the door. Laurel jumped and tried to back away, but I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her to me, smashing my mouth against hers.

She fought against me. She brought her hands up between us and shoved at my bare chest, her nails biting against my skin. I let her go. I let her put space between us. I huffed and backed off, hands up in a surrender motion.

“Why are you here? Why did you come back?” I snapped. She folded her arms, folding in on herself.

“I don’t know.” She whispered.

“Do me a favor,” I huffed, struggling to keep my distance. “Next time you decide to jump on my dick, make sure it’s actually what you want.”

I couldn’t stand there anymore, watching her look at me like I was the bad guy. I needed to get back to my life, which she chose to remove herself from. Even if I didn’t want to marry Michelle, even if she was who I actually wanted to be with, Laurel would never admit that she wanted the same thing.

“That’s not fair.” She tried. I shook my head and opened the door.

“Neither was losing Jimmy.”

She let me walk out. No shirt, no phone, but at least I had my pride. I wasn’t going to grovel.

If she made her choice, I’d be around, but until she did, I couldn’t risk being in the same room as her, alone.