Someone Lost, Something Gained

The end of November arrives. Hattie and Veda spend the morning at the guys’ house, then they convince the men to come with them to the Thanksgiving feast held by the neighbourhood. It’s too cold to sit outside, so they make their rounds to each house, eating enough to not make the hosts feel jilted before moving onto the next one.

Everyone loves Liam, Harry, and Louis as easily as they love Niall.

Veda waits until December to admit she was accepted into a nearby university to become a physical therapist. Niall pulls her into a bone-crushing embrace then drags her out for a celebratory dinner. He shows how proud he is of her later that night. She falls asleep in his arms wearing his Eagles T-shirt.

He hasn’t ever asked for it back. Instead, he’s added to her collection each time he comes over.

Veda finally gets her first day off in two weeks, and she sits at the kitchen table with Hattie. Niall is working tonight, and David Barkie curls up in Veda’s lap. He doesn’t seem to mind the lack of his human. Veda, on the other hand, can barely tolerate that Niall isn’t here.

“Hey, Hatchling, can we talk?”

Hattie doesn’t hesitate to set her books aside. “Absolutely. What’s up?”

“I, uh, I want your input on something.”

“Talk to me, V,” Hattie says; her voice is too soft for the situation, as if she can sense how Veda’s heart is in her throat. How her blood is buzzing in her veins, the haze of fear clouds her mind.

“I want to ask Niall to move in.” The words come out in a rush. Once she starts, she can’t stop. “It might be too soon, but he’s been in my life since April. He… he means so much to me. I just, I wanna be able to come home to you and him and DB every night. But if you don’t want him to, feel free to say no. I won’t ask him, I promise. This is just—”

“Really stupid of you, V.”

This brings Veda up short. She blinks owlishly at her cousin. Hattie sighs and taps her fingers against the tabletop. Veda shrinks in her seat at the flat expression on Hattie’s face.

“Why the Hell would I have a problem with your boyfriend moving in? Honestly, Veda, he’s here all the freaking time. This would just be him moving in officially.”

“You don’t mind?”

“Nope. Look, you’re practically my sister. All I want is for you to be happy, okay? He’s amazing for you. I can see why you love him so much. And you deserve to be loved as much as he loves you. So if you don’t ask him, I will.”

“I think I can ask my boyfriend to move in on my own, thanks,” Veda protests, and Hattie doesn’t bother stifling her snort of disbelief.

“Mhm, I’ll believe it when I see it happen.” She pauses then throws her pen at Veda’s forehead. “Keep the PDA down to a minimum, please? Because it sucks when your should-be sister is so deliriously happy and you haven’t even taken your own boyfriend to bed.”

Veda cards her fingers through her hair, lets out a breathless laugh. This has gone better than she expected. “Fine. I’ll ask him. Also, you might have to spell it out for Liam. Love the dude, but damn, is he dense. Or he’s just super old-fashioned.”

“Then what do you suggest I do? Just walk right up to him, stick my hand down his pants, and lead him by his dick to his room?”

“It’s as good a plan as any.” Veda shrugs. “Can’t hurt to try.”

Hattie shakes her head and reaches for the pen from where it bounced across the table. “Go away so I can work. One last exam, and I am free for the next three weeks.”

Veda kisses her cousin’s temple and wishes her luck. Hattie waves her off, so Veda makes herself scarce.

To: Niall
< How are we working Christmas?

She yawns and burrows further into her blankets. The question has been on her mind all day, but she’s only just now gathered up the courage to ask. Right before bed. Because she didn't think this through. If she has to spend their first Christmas apart, she might just lose her mind.

From: Niall
> I work overnight on the 24th and 25th and I’ll be spending that morning sleeping :( but! I have 8-4 on the 23rd, so I should be able to come by in the afternoon. I miss you.

To: Niall
< I have to work Christmas, too, but I have the 23rd off as well, so my schedule is completely free for you, my love. I miss you, too. Send me a picture so I won’t forget your face.

From: Niall
> Nope. I think I’ll make you wait. What was it you said ? Anticipation makes the experience sweeter.

To: Niall
< Don’t you dare use my words against me.
< I love you.

A picture comes through seconds later, captioned with I love you, too. Veda smiles at the soft smile, the tender light in his eyes, the barest hint of chest hair as he lies in his bed. She wonders if he knows how much she needs him.

Now that she’s made the decision to ask him to move in, she can hardly make it through the days. Hattie starts studying in the library, citing Veda’s inability to sit still as a distraction. Veda understands; she paces around the house or finds something to clean whenever she’s home. Work can only do so much to keep her from her thoughts.

The want of the future she envisions with Niall.

She craves the stability that he brings, the love he’s given to her and taken from her. The warmth of his body in her bed and the kisses that burn into her skin. She needs him, just as he is.

Thankfully, decorating the house for Christmas helps take her mind off of the question that will change everything. She winds tinsel around the banister of the stairs while Hattie hangs fairy lights around the living room. She even tacks up mistletoe above the archway to the kitchen.

They place ornaments on the tree Veda drags down from the attic. Nonna brings over packets of homemade hot chocolate mix, and Veda bakes dozens of cookies for the neighbourhood. Hattie frosts them and placed them carefully into cellophane bags. Once that’s finished, they bundle up in their coats and make their way along the street. They slip and slide on ice, but they don’t fall.

It’s as much a tradition as it is for the Marions to go house to house singing Christmas carols. For Miss Sylvia to pass out candy canes, giving children extras. For Mister Thompson to pretend to be Santa’s helper in charge of finding out who’s naughty and nice. For Tommy to shovel off stoops and dig cars out of the snow.

The cousins separate to their own bedrooms to wrap gifts, and Veda doubts that Niall will like what she purchased for him. She isn’t sure about the thick sweater she paid Nonna to knit, a soft blue that almost matches his eyes. She wonders if he will even find the second one romantic, like she’d thought it was.

They both seem too simple. Not grand enough to show how much she loves him. Niall is so down-to-earth, gentle and sweet, but Veda knows he deserves better than these two measly presents.