Hold My Hand

Taylor stared at the pregnancy test on the side, her mind racing as she set a timer for two minutes and anxiously bit her lip. Snapped from her thoughts as her phone chimed, she grabbed the test and sat down on the closed toilet lid... negative.

With a shaky deep breath, she buried the test at the bottom of the bin and joined Shay in the kitchen. Not wanting to talk about it, she plastered a smile on her face and made herself a smoothie in silence.

“Are you feeling better this morning?” Shay asked from where she sat at the table eating.

“Much,” Taylor replied, “I’m going to visit Kelly soon if you want to come.”

“Sounds good.”

She’d just finished packing Kelly a few things, when a car horn sounded and she followed Shay out to the taxi. Much to her relief, Renee wasn’t there again when they arrived and she entered the room with a smile.

“Hey,” Shay greeted, kissing Kelly’s cheek and dropping into the seat beside his bed, “How’re you feeling?”

“Still sore, but Halstead reckons I should be out of here within the next day or two.”

They sat talking for almost an hour, when Shay decided to go get some coffee and disappeared from the room. Left alone, Taylor felt anxiety begin to stir in her chest and lowered her gaze to her hands.

“Tay, you’ve been really quiet since you got here, is everything okay?” Kelly inquired after a short silence, causing her to look over at him and take a deep breath as she spoke.

“I was so scared when I saw the news about the explosions and I just wanted to find you, but it didn’t get rid of the fear I felt,” Taylor admitted quietly, “Even now, I...”

The door opening cut her off and she remained quiet as Renee walked in, bustling around the room. Anxiety stirred in her chest and she started feeling easy, mumbling a quick goodbye before leaving.

Tears filled her eyes, but Taylor wasn’t sure if she was crying because she was scared or angry. Not wanting to leave Shay at the hospital, Taylor joined her in the cafeteria and pulled out her phone as it vibrated in her pocket.

‘Hi Taylor, just wanted to let you know that mom’s funeral will be held this Friday at the Holy Family Parish on West Roosevelt Rd.’

“What time?”

‘The service starts at ten and then there will be a small gathering afterward at the house, I hope you will be able to make it.’

“I wouldn’t miss it.”

Sighing, Taylor ran a hand over her face and tried to push back the fresh tears that threatened to fall.

“What’s wrong, Tay?” Shay asked, leaning forward in her seat and resting her hand comfortingly on Taylor’s arm.

“Everything,” Taylor told her, “I’m just going to head home.”

“I’m going to hang around here for a while, but we’ll watch a movie and hang out later.”

With a nod, Taylor made her way home and laid down on her bed. It was nearly two hours before Shay returned home and ordered pizza, while Taylor set up a movie.

Despite not sleeping much that night, Taylor still found herself awake early the following morning and headed out for a walk. Antonio’s apartment building soon came into view and she buzzed his number, stepping back as he emerged.

“Taylor?” he said with a frown, “Is something wrong?”

“It wasn’t just the drink talking,” Taylor mumbled as tears rolled freely down her cheeks.

Without a word, Antonio pulled her forward and wrapped her in a tight hug. She knew that it was the stress talking, but it was how she felt and she didn’t feel as though she could tell anyone else. Kelly had Renee and Shay had Clarice to confide in, but, currently, Taylor didn’t feel as though she had anyone.